I think the photos are great, but I'm with JohnP in the sense that I can't help but think that it looks unhealthy. If I saw someone very thin ordering a massive bacon burger with onion rings a beer and a coke, I would still have the thoughts in the back of my mind that this just can't be good for them health-wise.
I realize this is a sensitive subject and I wish for everyone to be comfortable in their own skin and everyone has equal rights toward happiness, but I can't control where my brain goes on this stuff.
You absolutely can control your own brain. It's called learning a new habit. You don't have to judge someone based on how they look. For example I used to look in the mirror everyday and say something negative to my reflection. I taught myself to think that and had to put in the time and effort to unlearn that behavior. Your thoughts are not an involuntary response. We can and should challenge out own thoughts especially when those thoughts are unnecessarily judgmental.
By the way, I saw women of every size and shape in those photos. You don't know what kind of health ailments any of them have. You're making assumptions on just a few of them based on one picture of them.
I doubt it is possible to change how I think at my age and ever apptitude test I have taken has said I am a natural problem solver which also means I am the kind of person who sees the problem. While this sometimes bothers people (like in this case) I like myself and don't plan to change how I think just because you feel I am being judgmental. I don't share your opinion in the slightest and frankly that isn't surprising because rarely do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wannabeskinny
By the way, I saw women of every size and shape in those photos. You don't know what kind of health ailments any of them have. You're making assumptions on just a few of them based on one picture of them.
#1) I never said they all were going to have health problems. Again, you're in your own head. Read what I actually wrote.
#2) It is not an assumption. It is a medical fact that if you're obese or heavier you are going to have a shortened life span and you will have health problems. Thinking otherwise is simply naive or willfully ignorant.
#3) I never said any of them have current health problems. In fact I would guess they don't right now based on their ages.
I'm not trying to change your opinion so there is no reason to get mean and start requoting yourself as if I don't know how to read. As a woman and a feminist, as a person who has been ridiculed and scrutinized and judged on how I look, as a woman who has lived for a considerable amount of time in an inner world of self shame it is important that I support another woman's right to express her own beauty. I would say the majority if people share your opinion. I wouldn't argue with the fact that obesity leads to health problems but that's not what that link is about. As women we are judged so much by our appearance. It's horrifying for someone to look at me and all they see is an early death sentence. There is so much more to me than my outward appearance and a woman's choice of clothing should not be contingent in her health.
Anyway, my own struggles with this is that I am on extended vacation on the Mediterranean right now. Before I left I considered taking a bikini with me but I chickened out and left it home. Now I regret it because I'm feeling really good about myself and would really enjoy wearing a bikini now. It's easier to drown out the naysayers when your inner sense if self acceptance is strong.
Last edited by Palestrina; 08-10-2014 at 04:48 AM.
I have to say I appreciate that this has been empowering for these women but I don't find that I can look at this without being mortified at how large most of these young women are for them.
I've had arthritis and joint replacement due to an accident and all I can see is a fast track to early onset arthritis even if these women eat healthily and exercise. Pain and immobility far earlier than normal. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
I hope they take the empowerment they feel to motivate themselves to make changes, enjoy their body at every size, but to get to a more healthy weight.
I have never seen people this big, and it was quite horrifying to see it on such young people. I can't see how anyone could be healthy at those weights. I am not sure I agree with it being glorified. I have very mixed feelings about this.500 pounds for one girl... I mean how much longer until she can't leave the house? Let alone wear a bikini...
I don't know how I feel about this. It is my impression that women in the middle of these extremes - 30s/40s, chubby/pudgy/overweight BMI - tend to be the ones who are most afraid or intimidated to wear a bikini. I know I certainly fall into that category. It's like, the hugely fat ladies *know* they are hugely fat, but I can dress in a way that makes me at least appear a bit thinner than I really am (at least I believe this it true). Placing me in a bikini, you'll notice my pudgy belly, the fat on my back, dimples on my thighs. I am more moved/inspired personally by middle-aged moms who dare to wear bikinis.
And for the record, I did wear a bikini, at more or less my current weight, in Hawaii a couple of years ago and after my initial trepidation ended up feeling quite comfortable. It seemed the European and Australian women were most comfortable in their own skin that American women are, from my anecdotal observations anyway.
What a great blog post! And so many cute swimming suits on lovely people!
As for the debate in this thread...
No one is glorifying any specific body shape in that blog post. The point was this:
No matter how you look, or what people tell you about your beauty or lackthereof, loving yourself is extremely important.
For those women, part of loving themselves was overcoming the feeling that they should be too ashamed to be seen (whether they were fat or thin).
Being fat or thin isn't a behavior - it can't be changed overnight. And it's a helluva lot easier to make a change at all if you love yourself.
I would never, EVER not want a woman or man to avoid wearing something (or feeling confident in themselves) because it makes me think of their potential health problems and an early death. How selfish of me would that be?
Wow, thank you wholeheartedly for sharing this! I thought it was really touching and the pictures were beautifully done. It actually had a wide range of size representation too which was neat as it's easy to forget that slender chicks have insecurities too and no one has a monopoly on self-loathing! What a great gesture for the site to provide a safe space for women to embrace their beauty no matter their size. I don't see how this is condoning obesity or downplaying potential health risks. It's an entirely different subject. We all have a right to self love at any age, weight, or other variable, and I would argue that self acceptance and the ability to feel beautiful is a far better motivator toward improved health than the shame and self-loathing we are all expected to feel as overweight people. When I feel bad about myself I treat my body accordingly. When I feel good about who I am (and that means ALL of me) I feel compelled to go above and beyond in all areas of my life.
Thank you for the link. As someone who has been overweight/obese since around age 18 I have always hated my body. I've also suffered from depression, and anxiety that deepened with weight gain. Body love, which is what I like to call it.. is learning to love yourself, regardless of your size. At least that's what it is to me. It's the message that you don't have to be a certain size to love yourself.
Hating myself has led to so many negative things, including overeating in general, binging/purging, attempts to starve myself, and not exercising (I didn't want to go out, and had no motivation). When you love yourself, part of the mental change includes caring about your body and your health. I realize that isn't true for all people, and some people are motivated by shame.. however there have been studies that show positive motivation has much more of an effect on a larger scale.
The fact of the matter is we don't know where someone is in their life, why they are at that weight, if they're currently working on getting healthy, or what their doctor has to say.
I actually had a conversation with my aunt at the wedding I attended this weekend about this very thing.. she was asking me why I did the HCG diet, which restricted calorie intake to 500 a day. My answer was that it was dropping weight off fast, and at the time I just wanted to lose it as fast as possible. I didn't care about my health, I just wanted people to not stare, to not make comments about how large I was, and to not tell me I should feel ashamed. People don't care where you are in your own personal process, they judge you on what they see, and that's sad because it doesn't support healthy processes.
It wasn't until recently that I actually started caring about myself, and caring less about what people have to say about me that I was able to make a positive change. The mental part had to come first though, and I would love to get more people to love themselves so they can make healthy choices, and improve their life.
Sorry for the long post, this is a very sensitive topic for me and I think the mental part of being healthy, and the benefits that follow are huge. The group that feels the need to comment out of "concern" always seems to forget their "concern" is likely making the problem worse for a large part of the population because that isn't how motivation works.
I identify a lot with the pictures. It was only when I learned to love myself, have fun the way i was and apreciate my body for what it was that I was able to do something about my obesity. Feeling good about yourself or being able to have fun without being ashamed of your body does not mean you are not willing to change to a healthier lifestyle or that you are not doing it already. I'm sure when i was already living a healthier life filled with exercise and healthy food many people looked at me thinking i needed desperate help because i was obese. Heck, i'm still obese and i'm healthier than a lot of thin people i know! Feeling good about yourself and accepting who you are doesn't necessarily mean you are part of the FAM. I accept who i am in many aspects but i also want to evolve as a human being. The pictures actually show women of all sizes: normal weight, overweight, obese, morbidly obese and one or two seem even underweight. They show women comfortable in their own skin or at least trying to deal with their bodies. A lot of pressure is put on women when it comes to looks... this pressure can be exhausting.... i love the pictures.
Last edited by Marina Brasil; 09-23-2014 at 06:56 PM.
