Advice on saying no...
 

Hey guys,

So I'm kind of in a really awkward situation right now!

I have a really good friend, one I went to to undergrad and grad school with, and he just recently asked me if I was interested. He first asked me about my dating life (which is nonexistant!!) but he lives on the east coast and is in medical school so I really didn't understand how it would even work since we are miles apart??

BUT BUT BUT, I'm jumping the gun here, I'm not actually interested in the guy. He's just not "manly" enough for me? If that makes sense?? I hate writing this out, because it makes me sound shallow but he's very soft/gentle type of guy, which I can already see it not working out for me, but I don't know how to tell him. He's been pretty persistent too.

I mentioned it to him before that I'm focusing on school, so dating really isn't my thing right now, I want to focus get back on track, but i also don't want him to think that im saying "there's hope for later just not now" especially if I end up moving to that state for school since I am applying to schools there.,

Am I making this a bigger deal than it actually is? I haven't dated in so long, I don't even know how to carry a normal conversation anymore with guys!

ugh I feel overwhelmed over nothing.

HELP ..ANYONE!

Been there. And honestly me not being up front with him ended up ruining our friendship. He saw "hope for a us in the future" and when I met my bf he was really hurt and felt jaded. I would just be up front and honest :) best of luck!

Thank you! Yeah I really don't want that to happen, he's a great guy. Just not for me. I told him just now and he stopped texting me. I hope this isn't the start of awkward :?:

The reality of relationships is the chance of loving someone who doesn't love you back in the same way. And visa versa.

It was good that you made the decision to be honest with him. And yes, there will be awkwardness. But if he wants to keep you as a friend, he will. And you can go on being the good friend you've been up to now.

It may be awkward for a while but should bounce back eventually. He's probably embarrassed and/or hurt but if the friendship was solid before he will be back.

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