Thanks for the advice, everyone. Neither job I work is something I could see myself doing more than necessary, and the only careers I've ever considered doing long term all require an education. I have a high school diploma, that's it. I live in a rural area of the midwest, where the only jobs you can get without a college education are those in a factory, on a farm or in the service industry. None of those jobs offered pay very well without high risk of injury, long hours and/or being very physically demanding. And by pay well, I mean I might make $2000-$3000 a month with overtime.

I am going to continue working both jobs until I can pay off some bills. I am NOT a big advocate of going on assistance at all, but at this time I'm literally working myself to exhaustion for no gain at all. Plus, I would love to have a more rewarding career to look forward to.

I've walked the single Mom routine for quite awhile before I remarried and it is TOUGH! Never, ever,e ever feel you are being a bad Mom because you want better for your children. That actually makes you better as a Mom! I have always been a big fan of the pro and con and brainstorming ways. I list all my options (no matter how crazy they may sound) and do some pros and cons. Then I let it sit for awhile and pray and repeat the process. In the meantime, use your crockpot to good advantage (ie, pot roast on Sunday, beef and cheddar sandwiches on Monday and beefy veggie soup on Tuesday. Also, now is a good time to start teaching your kids to help around the house. We used to see who could fold the towels or the socks the fastest and the best. My kids could pick thier music of choice (within reason) while they cleaned. It was tough - I worked 70 hours shift work with two small kids and did volunteer work to barter for food for my kids. You are obviously a great Mom to be worrying about your kids and their futures. In the meantime, talk to the counselors at your kids school and/or an employment resource center. Often they will have scholarships or grants you may apply for. Also, I would much rather see my tax dollars go to someone who will make something of their life and change thier children's lives for the better get ANY assistance rather than seeing the people in my line buying filet mignon and bacon wrapped steaks and abusing the system! I know you will make a c\good choice, one that is good for your kids AND for you! Good luck and study hard when you go back to school!

The assistance isn't just a give away for lazy people- it's intended to get your out of your current situation and give you the school you need to make your family's life better. Take it, there's no shame.

Completely, totally agree.

Go to school and get a career you'll love.

From what I can tell, nurses and midwives and physicians' assistants have a much better chance of finding work in their specific fields than a lot of other degree/program graduates. It's not like you're going back to school for a Swedish Master's degree in underwater basket weaving - you have a career path in mind that is very much needed and not morally bankrupt :P I'd say go for it, assistance is there for times like these and you will likely pay it back many times over in the future as was mentioned.

For what it's worth, you could look into working as a personal caregiver for a state-run consumer directed services program in the meantime. These vary by state, but I know in New York State caregivers receive modest hourly pay but full benefits and insurance. You don't need any credentials or specialized training because the principle of the programs is that the disabled/sick person is fully capable of training their own personal assistants to do things however they want.

I agree with the others who say getting assistance isnt shameful, it's what it is therefore. Just because others abuse the system doesn't mean people who truly need the help should feel ashamed to make use of it.

I also second the idea of starting small. A CNA license or a Med Tech license can usually be acheived in under a year, with that you can obtain a better job and work on furthering your degree as well. One of my best friends is going this route, she just took her CNA exam and is waiting on her license number. Once she is settled into a routine wherever she works she is going to take her pre-requisites online for her end goal of becoming a Physicians Assistant

I empathize with your situation. At 26 years old I live at home, attend graduate school and work a just-above-minwage-job which is very related to my career goals. My parents are less than understanding about the situation but I suck it up because I know this is what it’s going to take to get to where I want to go. Best case scenario I am a year and a half from being completely independent. In a way I am receiving “assistance” and It is very humbling to say the least.

I get stafford loans from the government for graduate school. Pretty much anyone can get them. I imagine being in a nursing program would qualify you for the maximum. I get something like $10,200 every semester minus tuition and then they send me a refund check for the difference. I attend an “affordable” state school so I get a decent refund check each semester. The refund checks plus what I make at my job are just enough to pay my bills with a little breathing room.

I wholeheartedly support the sentiment that school doesn’t necessarily equal better job in these tough times. Many recent graduates are struggling to find jobs even in fields like nursing.

I work at a nursing home. I recommend getting a CNA (certified nursing assistant) lisence and finding work at a nursing home. The program to get this lisence is only something like 8 weeks long and many healthcare companies offer free CNA training. Even if you have to pay for the course it’s a cheaper community college type deal. The bulliten board at work is always littered with postings that they are looking for CNAs for different shifts. At my facility I believe they start around $15 an hour with the more experienced aids making over $20. In these tough economic times I’m surprised more people aren’t becoming CNAs. The demand is through the roof and you can make something resembling a living wage with 2-3 months of training/schooling. Obviously it isn’t for everyone and involves things like changing diapers, but the aids do get to spend a lot of time with the residents. It’s one of those jobs where you really feel like you are making a difference.

You could easily CNA part time while attending nursing school. At my facility the company actually offers some tuition reimbursement for CNAs going to nursing school as many are doing just that. Finishing nursing school with 2-3 years of experience in healthcare would put you in a much better position than just earning a degree. Plus you’d really be able to determine if healthcare is for you without “biting the bullet.”

Lastly I’d like to add that attending school later in life/while working makes it so much easier to focus and put things into perspective. My graduate grades are MUCH better than my undergraduate grades. You just really realize how important school is and find that extra energy to get everything done, even when you’re swamped. It’s a GREAT experience to go back to school.

GOOD LUCK!!

As far as I'm concerned you've worked your butt off and paid your share of taxes to get some assistance. You aren't taking assistance because you are lazy. You're taking it so you can make a better future for you and your kids.

My 2 cents...Go To School!!!!!!! The state assistance is there for EXACTLY this reason. It's not like you will be on it for years. You will be making a better life for you and your kids. I dropped out of nursing school 20 years ago and have regretted it ever since. If I had stuck with it, I would be making 100K ( I was going to be a surgical nurse). There is a MAJOR nursing shortage thru out the country! Do something NOW before you're almost 40 and regret that you didn't go back to school. Good luck!!!

-Megan

Here's my take on this. I worked a VERY physically demanding manual labor job at a tree farm for almost five years. All I got from this job was an autoimmune condition from the constant exposure to pesticides and herbicides, plant hormones, and sunlight (although I have no proof). I also screwed up my back, my neck, and probably aged a bit from the sun even with sunscreen (I live in Florida). I went back to school to work as a vet tech. This was probably one of the best things I have done. It opened my eyes to the fact that I am a person that needs mental stimulation. I also make MUCH more money with benefits than I did doing the labor job. The first time around, I paid for my classes. I am now back in school, and I pay what I can. I have taken loans, which are loans after all, and will have to be paid back. But I have also refused loans, which you can do each semester, if you don't need them. You have a goal, which is half the battle. I don't think that college is the be-all end-all of betterment in life. But it affords the student opportunities that will not come to a factory worker. The networking alone is valuable. The exposure to a variety of types of people only serves to open your mind. That is, after all, part of the college experience. And remember, even if you were to look for a higher paying job, you will be competing against people who are overqualified for a job you will still hate ten years from now. It is important (I feel), to do work that satisfies your needs for a sense of accomplishment. I don't know the salary of CNAs and med assistants where you live, but where I am they make about 10-12 dollars an hour. Not much considering the amount of bodily excreta you will be mopping up. And the courses and training for those jobs will likely not transfer for credit to the college you attend for nursing. If you know what you want, go for it. Take a damn loan, what's the harm? You will pay it back. The likelihood of getting a better paying job is greater than the likelihood of you being glad you gave yourself arthritis for a job you hate and wasted your youth on. I know the difference between a better paying job you love and a piss poor labor machine that will ultimately be the vampire that drains your life. If it were not for my sense of being at the limit of things I can do in my career now, I would not be changing jobs. I have a sense of purpose, my job makes a difference, and makes me happy. However, if you think that going to school will afford you more time with your kids, you may need to reconsider. Any college, and especially science programs, require seemingly more time than you think you have. It requires commitment on another level entirely. But I would much rather see you working as a happy, productive labor nurse than a mentally depleted factory laborer. And with as much scholarship and grant money as there is out there, you might not have to take the dreaded welfare others here seem to scoff at. But if it were me, knowing what I know now, I would not be above taking assistance. I look at the wealth disparity even in my job. The vets make pretty good money, the techs do okay, and the kennel staff seem to struggle a bit. The difference? Education.:yes: So gather as much information as you can BEFORE you make a decision. I would recommend doing observations in the hospital departments you would be interested in before you commit. I changed my major after doing this! The classes you take will help you figure it out, too. I found out that 7 classes of advanced Chemistry was REALLY not for me, but only after experiencing 2 of them. Best of luck!

re:
 

I should add a caveat that is worth researching before you decide on the assistance route. Some states require welfare to be paid back especially if the father does not have a court child support order. I don't know the specifics of your life, but it's something worth exploring before deciding.

In my opinion, that's what the "assistance" is for. It's not for someone to "live" off of - it's to have some time to better yourself, take care of your business, & when you're done - HEY! - no more assistance! - Just the proud notion that YOU are taking care of YOU and your children.

NEVER FORGET: sometimes we must make ourselves humble for the greater good. THIS is the greater good. :hug:

Don't look at going on governmental assistance as becoming a "loser." You are literally investing in yourself, your future and your children's future. And your family is giving their support! I might be worried if you were getting assistance to get a worthless degree (I know lots of people who got in debt for college and they were humanities majors) but you are getting a degree with a specific job in mind. That sounds like a smarter career move than many people make. I get where you are coming from, I am totally living on assistance now while I am in graduate school and I feel like ****. But I know that I am going into a good field and that my loved ones support me.

The only thing I will suggest is that you do a TON of research before you take out loans, you don't want to get stuck with any surprise fees or interest rates. Also if you can, borrow money from family. I know this is uncomfortable but student loans have an interest rate of around 6.8% and this amount compounds while you are in school. These days the government isn't giving out anything significant in terms of scholarships (but of course try to get it, anything helps). My point is that borrowing from family really sucks but at least you don't get stuck with disgustingly large interest fees. People literally can spend decades paying back their loans. Considering you have two small children maybe your family will be more ready to help out financially...especially since there are a lot of jobs available in nursing compared to other fields.