I forgot and now she's mad. Anything I should do?

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  • My coworker/cubicle mate was on vacation last week. The Friday before she left she asked me to water her plants at her desk. I said that I would, despite being relatively uncomfortable doing so. 1) I'm extremely forgetful 2) I kill plants, she knows that.. she's seen what happens when I try to keep a plant at work. Plus we've discussed why I do not garden many times.

    So I completely spaced and forgot to water any of her plants at all last week. I fessed up instead of pretending that I had done it once early last week. Now she's super pissed. She's kinda passive aggresive, so she's not acting like she's super pissed but I've been sitting next to her for 4 years.. I know that tone.

    I feel REALLY guilty about forgetting. None of her plants died, but her spider plant wilted a bit and she's SO anal about those plants. So I feel like a big giant jerk. She's prim and proper, big on formality and pleasantries and stuff like that, so is there anything polite I can do to make up for my mistake? I did apologize several times when I fessed up but I didn't know if there was anything else I should do.
  • She may need some time to get over it. Perhaps you can bring her a new little plant as a peace offering?
  • She knew what you were like with plants before she asked. I feel that she went into her vacation with full knowledge you aren't a plant person. I'd just give her time to be angry. Nothing is completely dead so she should get over it eventually.

    I'd drop it for now. If I'm irritated with a co-worker the last thing I want them to do is continully apologize. Let me be angry at you for awhile, I'll get over it eventually.
  • You've already apologized, you don't need to do anything else. I'm like you- I can look at a plant and kill it. She knew that before she asked you. Let her be mad, she'll get over it.
  • Also, she may be a little mad at herself because she knew of your plant killing skills and still asked you to take care of them.
  • Phew. Thanks guys! You put things in perspective. It's not the end of the world, I just hate having people mad at me. I feel crazy guilty when people are mad. But I guess I'll try not to worry about it. Nothing died, it should pass.

    I had thought of buying her a small "I'm sorry" plant but I don't know what kind she'd like. Plus giving a plant to someone without knowing if they want one is equal to giving someone a pet in my book, lol.
  • I know we're all on a diet here, but baked goods go a long way in the office. Or her favorite Starbucks drink. It's something you can do casually, like, I stopped for coffee this morning... I at least owe you a latte.. Or, I know it doesn't make up for my forgetfulness, but how bout a muffin?
    Haha. Maybe I'm way off base, but in every place I've ever worked, sharing food or coffee seems to break the ice and bring people together. Who can be mad when they're ingesting sugar? ;-)
  • oh my god, it's just plants. let her get over it. getting her a coffee seems sufficient. but seriously..plants.
  • You're only human, geez! You've apologized and I think that's good enough. I mean, it's not like you did it on purpose. she just needs to get over it. But if you feel you need to do more I like the coffee over mrslynah suggested.
  • I would go for a humor angle. A "get well soon" card addressed to the plants and maybe a $5 sbux card if you are feeling generous and you think it would help smooth things over. Office tension sucks and I think it's worth avoiding if possible.

    I set outlook reminders for things like that because I have a horrible time remembering!
  • Well if you want to do more than just say sorry... keep it small.

    Just send her a gift card to Lowe's or get a prepaid VISA gift card or a nice clean fresh bank bill of cash that can be used wherever and tell her in a "I'm sorry" card that the next plant is on you. (Don't use a nasty wrinkly one if cash -- just get a crispy one from you bank, makes the card so much nicer)

    There. You made tried to make ammends with grace. Next time just do not agree to something you are not comfy doing. You don't have to be people pleaser if it lands you in places you are not comfy in. That's all the baggage YOU have to hold and tend to.

    She wants to make a fusspot after that, that's HER baggage, so let her hold her OWN bags, hold her own tempest in a teapot. You don't have to drink her tea.

    Her mad, her upset that she pushied a known plant killer into tending and you killed the plants, etc. That's not your fault, it's her bags to hold, she took the risk. She's gotta own it. You were not deceitful in your plant killer ways. (joking to make you feel better)

    There's subirrigation you know -- I have subirrigation planters that go 1-2 weeks without my having to top up. She could have repotted in one of those and topped it before she left. She could have taken it home to the house sitter, whatever on her travels. Don't blow it up bigger than what it is. Just give her space to get over herself.

    Not end of world. Stop worrying.

    A.
  • Quote: She may need some time to get over it. Perhaps you can bring her a new little plant as a peace offering?
    Thats what I was thinking as well. Or maybe some plant food and a "I'm sorry I almost killed your plants" card.
    She'll get over it. At least you fessed up and didn't lie. She knows you are honest.
  • Honestly, she'll get over it. It's plants, not pets. What you did was NOTHING compared to what a former co-worker did once. She forgot to check on my cats the whole weekend, their food bowls were empty when I came back and she was honest saying she totally forgot, busy with kids, stuff, etc. Thank goodness I decided to fill up their water bowl and their food bowls a lot more than usual before I left but jeez. Cats were fine in the end and I of course eventually forgave her and I didn't ever ask her again.
  • Buy her these..

    http://www.amazon.com/Aqua-Globes-AG...plant+waterers

    That way if she ever has to go away again she can simply fill up the spikes and stick em in the plants and BAM no more wilted plants. They last for two weeks, so she never has to worry about asking you to water her plants for her again.
  • ^ That's a good idea!