So after a rough 4 months, things are finally starting to look up for me. Quick recap: I graduated from college in December and got immediately dumped (various reasons, boils down to he was a scumbag). In school they made it sound like you would get a job right out of school but that wasn't the case for me. I moved home with my mom who doesn't work and she spends all day mentally torturing me. Just insulting me, saying I'm worthless, that my 2 part time jobs aren't real jobs, why won't I get a JOB, etc.
Things are looking up because I've realized just how big of a piece of crap my ex was and it makes me feel better about him being out of my life. Also, I just got hired! My degree's in biology and I'll be working as a lab technician at a company that does all sorts of testing on medical devices. This will keep me out of the house away from my mom, and I had hoped it would make her happy. Of course it didn't, but that's besides the point, nothing has really changed there. The problem is that even though things seems to be turning up, I feel miserable. Like, incredibly exhausted, crying for no reason, can't summon the emotional energy to go on dates with a guy who I do like, my room is a mess because I can't find a reason to clean it, and so on. To be honest, it's scaring me. I should be happy. I have a great new job related to my degree, and I get to keep my part time job at a theatre (I love that job so much) because the hours work with it. Is this just becoming an adult? Why do I feel this way?


