Very same thing happened to my ex-(girlfriend then boyfriend). I don't know if this is what it was, but giving up the "gay" identification is difficult. I considered myself a lesbian for most of my young adult years, though I was secretly attracted to men at times, but being "bisexual" was frowned upon. Now I claim bisexual and to heck with what others think. But as I am now in a long-term, committed relationship with a man, I definitely do not fit in with the gay community anymore and I do miss that.
I think in the end, gender and sexuality are far more fluid that most people are comfortable believing.
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