Good heavens, what an extraordinary statement. No, of course that's not the case, just as it's a myth that all men are biologically driven to rape women if the latter happen to be wearing remotely slinky outfits. I think the pair of you have some very deep jealousy and trust issues you need to work on, hon. I'm glad that you've both decided to go to relationship counselling.

A friend of mine has just escaped from a relationship where his girlfriend was so jealous that she isolated him from all his friends. In other words, domestic abuse. He's in a terrible state. I think the girlfriend had serious mental health issues, but whatever caused her behaviour, it was not remotely acceptable and caused him a lot of damage. Please don't travel down this road.

Esofia I didn't mean it as a generalization of all men, it was just an observation of what I have seen/experienced before and I don't see how that in anyway in comparable to the rape statement, rape is a terrible thing for anyone male or female to go thru and to blame the victim is a terrible thing to say even if some people think that myth is true. I admitted to having had jealousy issues and I have tried to work passed them. Things have changed a lot since we were first married, the friends he knew at the time that we met were heavily into drugs and drinking, he himself has told me that he knew that he wasn't heading in a good direction hanging out with them all the time.

I understand that having interests outside the relationship is healthy and I support that but like I pointed out and I don't think I am wrong or am I? by asking him to spend some time with just me, to go out on a date with me it doesn't have to be a fancy dinner or anything something as simple as going out for a hike, just a walk in the park, or the movies. We don't see each other much because of his work he comes home on the weekends and leaves usually on Sundays. He is a truck driver and we try to keep the lines of communication open by talking to each other on the phone.

The only thing that bothered me about the single woman was that since she came around I have been in a way banned from going with him on trips because he "fears" that I will yell at her. In the all 6 years I have known him I have never been one to cause a scene, never once in my life. That raised my suspicions, he used to complain about the dealing with the people in the office and would tell me about everyone not because I was poking and prodding for information but he would tell me when he wanted to vent out his frustrations, and I had never heard of this woman until they became facebook friends. I asked who she was and he said oh its a friend. When she commented on something of his that I had also commented on I saw a picture of just boobs...yeah not what a wife wants to see on her husbands friends picture.

I was very clear with my fiance from just before we became a couple.
If he wants to have lonely dates with other women he can turn around and just do that without me in his life.
I don't mind us going out together with other single women in the group, I don't mind getting to know all his girlfriends and be friends/acquaintances with them too, but as I won't go out alone with single guys (and God knows I could do that every day) he won't either.
I was not *****ing, I was not demanding, I didn't opress him. I simply stated how I want my life and asked if he wanted to live like that too. He accepted and we have had 5 years of spotless joy and plenty of fun with common friends.
There is nothing wrong with making clear what is important to you and what you expect from your man/woman. In fact there are many things wrong in expecting the other party to guess what you want and be sad whenever they fail.
I did my part of course in hearing out what he wants and adjusting to it.

Chubbykins I totally agree with what you said! I don't see it as controlling just about being a part of his life. I know everyone has different views on relationships and things such as friends or whatever but I just asked to be included or to be the one he wants to go out with sometimes, you know?

my DH has many friends who are girls, mostly relatives of some sort, some co-workers, etc....he is always honest with me about where he is and what he's doing and always asks if i'm okay with him doing x-y-z because neither of us want to do something that would make the other one uncomfortable....he's gone out to the bars with his co-worker friend and her friends to celebrate her birthday, things like that, and i'm not bothered by it...i know her and she's been to our house and it doesnt bother me...and likewise i wont do things that make him uncomfortable either...he came from a relationship where his gf cheated on him so trust is very important to both of us

but again, it has to be a mutual thing where you both trust each other and agree on things like that...neither DH or i go out very often together but we will on special occasions, and that's just fine by both of us...he's never given me suspicion not to trust him, and i am trustworthy to him also