My 20 is in May. Unlike a lot of people, I had a really good high school experience and despite being far away from almost everyone, I'm still friends with a lot of people. I can't say I have an unfriendly relationship with anyone. It was a unique experience and I really enjoyed it.
I'm not sure I'm going to go. For one thing, I've been a SAHM for the past few years. I have done almost nothing besides parenting. At all. No travel. No job, not even any volunteer work. I feel like the most boring person alive.
Second, I have gained over 100 pounds in 20 years. Let me be clear: my friends will not care. I get together with a large group of friends about once a year. They've seen me, they know. They do not care at ALL.
I care. It's sad. I've just let myself go. I look so tired. My skin looks tired, I haven't had a good haircut since my daughter was born. I haven't done anything for myself. I never get enough sleep. I'm worried all the time and it shows. I don't take time to exercise. And I'm so so so overweight.
I would like to take the next four months and try to work on myself...not to impress anyone but I guess this twenty year marker is coming up and it reminds me of all the plans I had for myself and how very few of them I've followed through with. It reminds me that I used to take the time to take care of myself, to exercise, to care about my looks AND my brain and in the past few years it's like I just dropped out of life.
Just wondering if anyone else is in the same spot?
I have my own trepidations. I had my daughter when I was just 20. She's in college now (she started when she was 17)....so I was young to have her and she was young to start college, and while I wouldn't change a thing and I burst with pride about how amazing she is, I really don't want to hear: WOW! you have a daughter in college? The statement is typically accompanied by a slightly upturned upper lip. I love my daughter and my life far more than I care about anyone's opinions, but I know it will irritate me a little.
Can you find the time to get a haircut? I think that always helps me feel better. I should take my own advice as I'm reverting to ponytails more often than not these days.
And, I love this:
Be the change.
Bloom where you're planted.
The one you feed.
My ten year is coming up and I'm not sure if I will go. I have gained a lot of weight and though I've lost some I think I'm still heavier than when I saw most of the people.
I just felt so many of them were judgemental as it was and quite a few of the people I went to school with who were supposed to be my friends just stopped contacting me so I've cut pretty much all those people out of my life. I just fear I'll sit in a corner with no one to talk to and wind up leaving early.
My 20th is coming up this year, and I'm not going. It's not because of what I have or haven't achieved, or how I look. It's because everyone I went to school with was a jerk, I haven't maintained any of my friendships from back then, and I don't think I'll like the grown-up versions of these people any better than I liked the teenaged versions.
Wow, I sound so bitter! LOL Just keep doing what you're doing, whatever you decide about the reunion. You'll do fine!
I had a really good high school experience. It was stressful academically because I was in over my head and I have TERRIBLE study habits but any social drama I totally brought on myself. My friends were great. I've made peace with old boyfriends. No one was mean to me (at least if they were, they had the decency not to do it to my face). I'd like to see everyone but at the same time, a lot of my friends have gone on to be very accomplished and while I am very happy for them and I feel confident THEY don't care that I haven't been as successful on that front, it makes ME a little sad that I haven't pushed myself at all. I am proud of my daughter and the kind of mother that I am, but I could and should be doing more and really, the child is five. Yes, I have been busy with her but that hardly explains what I did with the 15 years BEFORE she came along.
midwife, most people in my graduating class have just started having kids in the past few years. There will be a lot of toddlers, newborns, and a few women are pregnant and will still be in May. There are a few of us with older kids, kids in high school and just starting college...the rest of us are trying to claim them for babysitting. I doubt you'll be the only one there with an 18 year old! If nothing else, it forces people to tell you how you look WAY too young to have a kid in college (I will take my ego stroking anyway I can get it)!
BTW, as someone who has been a SAHM and as someone who has worked outside the home doing a job I love, there is nothing (IMO) as special and important as being a mommy. Be proud of who you are and what you do.
I have an "all-school reunion" this summer...it has only been three years since I graduated, but it's a big thing for my itty bitty town...I still have yet to decide if I'm going to go yet or not...
My friend & I were talking about Romy & Michele's High School Reunion the other day..which is our fave best friend movie. And we started thinking about our own lives. We realized that we haven't done anything!! We got married, and had kids (her, not me) and that was it, lol!! We're just now getting around to going back to school. Our 10 year is in 2 years..so I would like to show up and say that I have a really awesome job! I wish I could avoid the whole thing, but my husband was Mr. Popular in high school, so we have to go, lol!! Hopefully, I'll be slimmer too. That would be an added bonus, lol!
Anyone else with a class reunion coming up?
I like your perspective, Nicole.
