I am almost 30 , have been married for 11 years , 3 kids (9,3,1).
I have my surgery for this Friday October 8 .... right now i do not want more babies ... but is not the same to say ( not want to I can not)
I am not complete sure , some times when my kids are fighting , is a yes no more babies for sure ... but then when my 3 year old baby boy say mami I love you .... makes me thinks.
If you're not 100%, I wouldn't do it. You're still very young, if I were in your shoes, I would chose something less permanent. Maybe look into some long term birth control and then revisit the possibility of tubal ligation in a few years. I'm pretty sure my husband doesn't want any more kids, but I'm not ready to say no more, so I wouldn't consider anything like that yet. You should do what you think is right for you, but if you're not 100% sure, then I would get something that doesn't guarantee that you'll never get pregnant again.
Height: 5 ft 8.5" athlete who can give a punch & certainly take one too! :)
I got my tubes tied when I @ 22, & have been married 22 years with ZERO regrets in my decision. FYI, I chose the kidless route. Although my SIL, had 4 kids,& got her tubes tied, she got remarried & her new hubby wanted a child together, so she got her tubes untied which cost a lot of $ & had another child, so I say think before you do! Being you don't sound 100% sold on the idea, I say maybe it's not the route for you just yet....
Last edited by evilwomaniamshe; 10-04-2010 at 11:53 PM.
I think if you aren't completely sure you shouldn't do it.
I had my tubes tied at age 27 when I had my second daughter. I was having a c-section so the doctor said he could do it if I was positive. I and my husband were positive. However, there have been times when I think we would have had a third child if I hadn't done it at such an early age. While I didn't really want another child, I think dh eventually did and we didn't have that option.
I would wait if I were you.
Good luck with your decision.
I got my tubes tied when I @ 22, & have been married 22 years with ZERO regrets in my decision. FYI, I chose the kidless route. Although my SIL, had 4 kids,& got her tubes tied, she got remarried & her new hubby wanted a child together, so she got her tubes untied which cost a lot of $ & had another child, so I say think before you do! Being you don't sound 100% sold on the idea, I say maybe it's not the route for you just yet....
I really want to explore this option, but am upset that most doctors would not be willing to perform this procedure. I've known quite some time I don't really want kids, (i'm 23, i've known since 15). so, may I ask how you convinced a doctor to tie your tubes?
I really want to explore this option, but am upset that most doctors would not be willing to perform this procedure. I've known quite some time I don't really want kids, (i'm 23, i've known since 15). so, may I ask how you convinced a doctor to tie your tubes?
I'd also love the answer to this. Doctors around here refuse to talk to me about it until I'm 35, because I don't have kids. If I had kids, they would have agreed to it years ago.
I don't know about that, bacilli. I had to convince mine I was really serious at 26 and pregnant with my second child. Actually, we had discussed it even before the pregnancy too since I didn't want to "late life" children. I WAS REALLY SERIOUS!!! I also was not one of those lucky women who had wonderful pregnancies. I was sick as a all get out and miserable through both. I got so used to vomiting everyday that I continued to for a couple months after delivering.
Then, when it turned out I had another daughter, he thought maybe I would change my mind in order to try for a boy. Ahhh... Na!!! I WAS REALLY SERIOUS!!! But, I still had to convince him even after three rounds of IVs to rehydrate me while pregnant. I couldn't believe he thought this was a decision I took lightly. Fortunately, I did have the two kids or he probably wouldn't have done it anyways.
I would joke that after finding out my mom had 5 and was the oldest of 12, he figured I could be the one to pay for all his kids to go to Harvard.
That being said, I agree with the other ladies. You really need to be very, very sure of your decision before you have it done. It's a PITA to reverse a tubal and there are no guarantees of success.
Last edited by Operator265; 10-05-2010 at 08:00 AM.
For women who want tubals and their initial GYN says "no", ask him/her, ok, who will do it then? He or she may feel concern that you will regret it, but he or she may know someone else who is willing to. If that fails, call your local Planned Parenthood for a referral. The big worry is regret, but it is not right to NOT be able to get your tubes tied because other people have had regret. Persistence is the key (although one should not have to persist to have a medically appropriate, legal procedure done).
You need to be 100% sure that don't want any more kids before you do that. You could try an IUD. The hormonal ones last 5 years and the copper ones last for 10 years. They can be removed to try for another child at any point.
In my opinion, a vasectomy is a better option. First, b/c we do all the hard work of pregnancy and delivery. Second, b/c tubal are real deal surgeries and come with all of the risks of anesthesia. Third, there have been many problems reported by women after tubals and complications. Long term side effects from vasectomies are so rare I have never even heard of one. I have only heard of short term discomfort from vasectomies and once in a while a guy will need an antibiotic. Problems with performance afterwards have been found to be primarily mental, not physical, again it's rare to have any complications. Vasectomies are office visits and guys are all good to go in 2-3 days, sex can resume in a week. Some guys just go right back to work after they get it done. See if your hubby will man-up and get a snip-snip so you don't have to go through major surgery and spend weeks recovering, it's only fair since you had the babies.
Whatever you do, make sure you don't want any more kids. Any surgical sterilization should be considered permanent! Reversals don't carry a very high success rate, in general.
My dh had a Vasectomy after my 5th was born. Before I became pregnant with him we pretty much felt we were done but wanted to think about it for a few more months. turned out I was pregnant. LOL
I have painful pelvic pain during the pregnancies and a few months after childbirth. I knew I didn't want to deal with that again. I wanted my 5th to be a girl but he is my little boy. As much as I'd like a girl, there's no guarantees. I know others that have decided on a permanent fix and still have those lingering "What if's" but they know they're done and happy. I'm sure I will always want another but heck I can't be popping out kids all my life. lol
think about it carefully before doing something permanent.
Height: 5 ft 8.5" athlete who can give a punch & certainly take one too! :)
therex and bacilli,
My doctor put the norplant birth control into my arm, it was shaped like a fan, I got it inserted and I had horrible side effects bleeding 25 days out of 30 days each month and I about had it, so I got it removed 8 months later (this product was pulled off the market years later) and being I was not a candidate for the pill, I chose getting my tubes tied for a safe birthcontrol option, being I knew I didn't want kids and being I was a mature married adult, my doctor had no problem and no questions about tying my tubes @ 22. Now hubs and I continue to have FUN & no worries about gettin knocked!
Last edited by evilwomaniamshe; 10-05-2010 at 10:51 PM.
Just out of curiosity, how are ladies getting tubals under 30? Do you have to approach several doctors or are they becoming more flexible?
Anyways glad to see you canceled, it's such a big step if you aren't 100% sure. Perhaps you will change your mind, perhaps not. I see a lot of ladies here did it with no regrets but it seems like they were 110% certain with no question
Just out of curiosity, how are ladies getting tubals under 30? Do you have to approach several doctors or are they becoming more flexible?
When I went to the doctor i want deep in my heart , a no from him .But he said yes , whit 0 questions, so i went ahead . Yesterday i have all my test for friday surgery and i was very sad .... today morning I Wake up , call and canceled .
Tubal ligation yes or not at 30 years...
Although my SIL, had 4 kids,& got her tubes tied, she got remarried & her new hubby wanted a child together, so she got her tubes untied which cost a lot of $ & had another child, so I say think before you do! Being you don't sound 100% sold on the idea, I say maybe it's not the route for you just yet....
