Great ideas everyone. I'm such a downer right now. I have an excuse for almost every good idea you all gave. My biggest down fault is really the very small town and area I live in. The nearest town with really anything to do or groups like you talked about is Madison and that's over 2 hours away. Moving away is not possible though because of my very good job and the visitation agreement we have set up for our daughter. Pooey. I also still attend collage and will be done with my third degree in May. My ex had my daughter the last two nights which may be why I'm feeling like such a downer today. I did go out and meet up with girlfriends both nights but still felt horrible once I got home and felt like I was faking all conversation while with them. And I've been donig everything to be civil and nice for my daughter (and secretly hoping he will get his head out of his butt) and then last night he blocked me from his myspace. Why? I don't know. Just because he knew that would kill me. Nice. Ahhh, OK, enough of that today!

I'm going to check out the books you guys mentioned. As far as church, we already have a Mom's group but it meets during the day time while I'm at work every other week. Plus, they are all happily married (there are only 3 in the group) and two are expecting babies.

I also really need to get some motivation and get in shape like crazy! It's "his" weekend with her so I can spend as much time as I want at the gym!

Start dating his brother or best friend! LOL! That'll show him!

ok, ok just kidding.....

when my spouse left I decided to make myself a better person and do all the things I always dreamed of doing.

but first I got counseling for my kid to help her cope with all that went on, after that...

I started taking acting and drama classes privately and in community college and then doing community theater and eventually got my SAG card and went on to film, television and commercials (all parts that if you blink you would miss me but hey I got in! LOL)

I got really serious about music and started taking music lessons (guitar and mandolin) and getting out and going to music jams, picking parties and open mic nights. And now I play in a band and teach music lessons myself.

I think it is good to do some things to distract you and help you get over this rough part of your life but think about this...

you are FREE! You can DO or BE anything that you want!

Ask yourself this. What is it that you have always dreamed of doing???

Become a writer? play a musical instrument? write poetry and have it published? becoming a gourmet chef? opening up a piercing and tattoo parlor? (ok thats one of mine! LOL),

The sky is the limit! You could start by looking into your local community college or adult education classes in your city.

My spouse ran off and left me with our kid... I was destroyed at the time. In retrospect it was the best thing that ever happened to me because I would not be who I am today if I hadn't gone through what I did!

I discovered who I really am!

For pure laughs try The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams. Or just about anything by P.G. Wodehouse. Mr. Midshipman Easy by Captain Frederick Marryat is also totally hilarious.

Wow, very inspiring post there! THANK YOU! I did play the piano growing up and have thought about getting back into it and getting really good. (I've been asking the DH for a piano since I met him, but never got one...) Maybe now is the time...once I get enough money saved up!

I feel like I've done everything else I wanted to do though and am/was ready for the pure family life of being a mom and wife. I joined the military (still in the guard), almost done with my third degree, have a good job, beautiful child with dreams of having more. If I could do ANYTHING, I would move somewhere that I could open my eyes and see the ocean every day and where it's warm all year round....but that isn't possible with having my daughter or my good job I have right now.

I'm going to start saving for a piano. And become a running/work out fool!

If you can't move to the beach then save up and buy a timeshare in Florida. Buy used and you can get them dirt cheap, My best friend has one in St. Augustine and get to use it when she doesn't and I LOVE it!


OR get that piano and again if you buy used you can get them cheap and learn to play!

first, take time to mourn the loss. dont jump into new things too quickly, but dont sit in the misery too long, but experiance it, then let it go. hopefully you can have an amicable relationship later. good luck to you!