Why do children scream and scream?
 

I don't have children. There's a girl who lives in the apartments across the street. She's probably about 8. She screams and screams as they play. Or sometimes she just stands and screams. It's been, like, an hour of her screams. It's driving me nuts.

Children, especially older ones, scream to get attention, pure and simple!

She screams because no one makes her stop :(.

I have a 9 year old and a 5 year old -- from the time this started (probably around 1 until about 2 or 3) they "tried this" for attention (I think most kids do a little bit of this). They learned by about 2ish that it got only negative attention and they stopped.

is she special needs? if a child stands and screams for long periods of time she may be self-stimulating....

ugh our neighbors let their kids stand outside unattended in our busy apartment complex and both of theirs scream constantly. and then once in a while, she screams at them to stop screaming. most of the time though, she ignores them. i'm scared one of them is going to get hit by a car- they are always running out into the driveways and streets and running around naked. the kids are like 3 and 5 though.

As ladybugnessa suggested, special needs is a big possibility. It's possible that the child has Autism or something else. If that's the case, it might make you feel less frustrated. If, on the other hand, this is just rude behavior, I can understand your frustration compeltely and suggest ear plugs. ;)

Originally Posted by luckymommy:
As ladybugnessa suggested, special needs is a big possibility. It's possible that the child has Autism or something else. If that's the case, it might make you feel less frustrated. If, on the other hand, this is just rude behavior, I can understand your frustration compeltely and suggest ear plugs. ;)

or screaming back. Your lungs are bigger, you'll win ;)

I've thought about screaming back, but I don't want the parents to come thump me for presuming to correct their child!

I have no idea if she's special needs. I never hear the parents come out and yell at her. I wonder how they can stand it.

Originally Posted by Ufi:
I've thought about screaming back, but I don't want the parents to come thump me for presuming to correct their child!

I have no idea if she's special needs. I never hear the parents come out and yell at her. I wonder how they can stand it.

i never corrected my special needs child by yelling at him.

do you live on my street or what?

Is it a "I'm hurt/scared" sort of scream or a scream like she's being chased in a game of tag? I have a 4.5 and 7 year old and the only time they have ever screamed was short little ones when they are chasing each other. I guess when I was in about 3rd grade my sister could tell when my class was playing tag because she could hear my squeal through the window. :D

If she just stands there and screams...yes, she probably is special needs. It could even be that she's hard of hearing or deaf and has no idea how loud she is...and why you wouldn't hear any parents telling her to stop. Yelling at a kid isn't the way to teach them not to yell anyway, but it is just a thought. I can certainly understand how it would drive you mad. My two will start making train whistles or singing at the top of their lungs...if we were in the country that would be fine, but I try to keep it to a minimum, without keeping them from having fun, since we have neighbors.

I scream back at my kids when they scream. I mean, in a playful way I scream at them, not in an abusive way. My oldest told me how annoying it was and I replied, "I'll never do it again if you'll never do it again!" It worked. If you really want to scream back, go for it, just let out a playful horror movie scream. Maybe she'll smile, who knows. Then again, if she is a special needs child that might not be such a great idea.

I would have to go talk to her parents and find out what she is. Maybe they'll also take that as a big hint.

I have 3 children, my 7 year old has a mild form of autism but he knows screaming like that is unacceptable. If she is in deed special needs then why on earth is she left outside by herself to just sit there and scream?

exactly.... if the child has a disability (prefer that word to special needs, we all have special needs, some of us have disabilities) then why is she left outside to scream and scream....
and to be honest that would drive my husband insane.... not me I am Deaf and it has its advantages to be honest.... but to listen to a kid scream and scream and the parents do nothing about it is inappropriate regardless of whether the kid has a disability or not.

s

I feel your pain. There used to be a family that lived across the street from me with a little girl that would scream incessantly, the entire day. It was an attention thing. Man, did I want to :frypan: that kid sometimes. :mad:

Originally Posted by 36Paws:
exactly.... if the child has a disability (prefer that word to special needs, we all have special needs, some of us have disabilities)

lol thanks...I don't think of my kid as having any kind of label, we just go about things a little different. It took me about 10 mins to type out "special needs" but didn't want people jumping on me for not using it. I guess I should just go with my gut and not conform ;)

Personally, I see nothing wrong with talking to her parents about (not confrontationally, but in a friendly way), and just ask them to put a muzzle on the kid ;) Or rather, tell them that while it's great that ther kids are having so much fun playing together outside, they're being very loud and screaming and you were wondering if they could talk to their kids about keeping their voices down a bit. If the child does in fact have a disability, but you approach in a friendly way, the parents might be honest about it -- that they really CAN'T make her be quieter. At least then you'll know what's up and you might even feel less aggravated by it. But if she's just screaming to get attention or whatever, hopefully the parents will realize letting her scream isn't such a good idea.

When we moved into our house our neighbors came over, introduced themselves and let us know their daughter was autistic and would, on occaison, be screaming :D -- this worked well, since the first time I heard her scream, it sounded like someone was killing her -- had I not had the information, I would have probably called the police!! Since we've moved in, we've added one more little man to our house, so the yelling in my backyard equals the neighbors daughter refusing to do something :D -- however, I've always made it clear to all my neighbors that if my kids were being too loud, please let me know. But, to me kids being kids (playing loudly) is something that you get in a neighborhood (just needs to stop at nighttime, no early morning, etc. and no screaming) If this child is loud to you, imagine what her parents hear!! I would make a nice social visit to the family (Maybe bring some cookies :D) and try to work the noise level into a conversation, maybe you will learn something about the family that will explain it or at least get it across to them that the child is too loud.

I don't know, but I have had my fill of the screaming as well. Was just at Target this morning and all thru the store...screaming, ugh!

So im pretty much laughing histerically at my job picturing all you ladies yelling louder than the kids. I too have done it. I agree with you nessa though if its a specials needs child that is a different story. My little cousins though at the time were 7y/o twins and would scream to get your attention instead of saying hey can i have this and the only way to get them to stop was to scream back. They got so puzzled and confused they forgot why they were screaming. Plus you get to release some frustration from listening to all of that

argh! I hate screamers. My little sister was a screamer. In her case I'd just beat her up and she'd hide in her room and cry but since you're an adult thats not an approptriate approach...lmao!
Maybe your neighbor kid standing outside screaming is saving the sanity of mom who sent her out there to scream instead of doing it inside. It could be saving her life doing it out there instead of inside with mom. In any case, if its you are in the same apartment complex complain to the management and have them take care of the situation. That would be the appropriate move instead of approaching the parents and creating inter-apartment conflict.

It isn't a scream of fear or of joy. I wouldn't mind it so much if she sounded like she was having fun. There are other children who play in the neighborhood and squeal, laugh, or sing. It's almost like she's just exercising her lungs or something. I've looked, and she's just sort of standing there, screaming recreationally. I'm not in the same apartment complex, and I'm not sure what apartment she belongs to, but I can keep an eye out.

Originally Posted by Ufi:
she's just sort of standing there, screaming recreationally.

Sorry, but that made me laugh...screaming for recreation. Guess it would be good lung exercise.

If she's doing that it may very well be that she's autistic or almost deaf and that is about the only thing she can hear. I've never yet met a kid who just stood there and screamed for the sake of screaming.

Some special needs/kids with disabilities (however you wanna say it;) scream in order to feel the sensation in their throat, mouth, and head. They might like the way it feels, or they might just like the fact that they feel ANYTHING. For example, some special needs/kids with disabilities like to gag themselves because it's one of the few sensations they can feel. Or kids who pinch/hit/bite themselves. It's a sensory experience that they are craving. Just a thought from a special education teacher....

Reminds me of my mom -- she said when my oldest sister was about 5 she decided to throw a fit that annoyed my mother immensely!! (rolling around on the floor, screaming, etc.). Mom said she had a thought -- fell down on the floor with my sister and copied everything she did -- my sister was so shocked at the whole thing, she never threw another one!! :D

As a mom I've learned there isn't much you can do about someone elses child (unfortunately!!) -- unless they are hurting someone. If this child isn't special needs, then the parent probably doesn't care/can't be bothered to correct her so your saying something might not have any effect. Isn't there somewhere you'd like to move too, possibly by the ocean or something?? ;)

Originally Posted by chickybird:
Just a thought from a special education teacher....

I have so much respect for special ed teachers...thank you for what you do, I know you all don't get enough thanks. My sister-in-law is a child psychologist for 3 school districts working with very troubled (some due to being abused as kids like with shaken baby syndrome, some chemical imbalances, etc.). My aunt teaches the disabled deaf. She had a class of 15 and only 7 of them knew their name...these are HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS! Their parents just gave up on them. One of the kids who was essentially a genius was deaf, but also had severe CP. He was always smiling but as you can imagine, with his hands curled up sign language is incredibly hard for him.

I love kids, but I know my limits...I am not patient enough to do what my aunt or sister-in-law do. I had a blast teaching a pre-K/K class that had a little guy with Downs (think they are calling it something else but don't know what). He was a fantastic kid, but that is about the limit for me.

To me, it sounds like lack of obedience. The child was probably put outside to scream because the parents couldn't handle it inside. We have some of "them" around here, and it drives us bonkers when a parent gets so sick of their child's screaming (they don't believe in any form of punishment), they just let them outside the scream themselves silly - even if it's 10 at night. BTW they did end up getting evicted because they didn't heed the warnings that the resident manager gave them.

DH and I were sitting down at a mall to grab a bite to eat this past weekend, and the mother left this 2 year old and 4 year old children while she wandered around the (VERY LARGE) food court to find some food. Her two year old son screamed and screamed (blood curtling, nerve wracking) the whole time she was away.

I'm not the one to "hit" children, but I sure felt like smacking that kid to get him to shut the **** up!!! OH MY GOD!!! The mother didn't even bat an eyelash! She just ignored them and did her own thing.

If it was my children 1 - they would be with ME, not left alone to play on their own 2- they wouldn't scream in the first place. Even my ADHD son KNOWS that screaming is not acceptable.

I think I would go talk to the parents and tell them it concerns you when their daughter screams like that, they will either tell you to MYOB, explain why the child does that or try to find another outlet for her

Originally Posted by chickybird:
Some special needs/kids with disabilities (however you wanna say it;) scream in order to feel the sensation in their throat, mouth, and head. They might like the way it feels, or they might just like the fact that they feel ANYTHING. For example, some special needs/kids with disabilities like to gag themselves because it's one of the few sensations they can feel. Or kids who pinch/hit/bite themselves. It's a sensory experience that they are craving. Just a thought from a special education teacher....

thats very true but then there is another issue here and that is that the child is being left alone outside to scream.....

The kids that yo uare talking about have a much more severe level of disability and would not be children that should be left outside alone to scream and scream.....

and if they screamers or do other self stim behaviors they should be brought in the house...... and if they are not then DCYF should be called because the child is not being cared for properly.....

Originally Posted by 36Paws:
The kids that you are talking about have a much more severe level of disability and would not be children that should be left outside alone to scream and scream.....

Yep, unfortunately it does happen. :( Hopefully the backyard is very secure with nothing the child could hurt themselves on...assuming that disability is involved.

We were leaving a shopping centre a while back and in the parking garage was a van with a woman in the front passenger seat. She was yelling constantly. The car was running, but no one was there. I was buckling my youngest in the car watching the other car. Several people came and stood behind that car obviously very disturbed, talking to each other. If one of them hadn't gotten their phone out made a call I was going to call the police...I am SURE that is what they were doing. This was a grown woman (kind of reminded me of my grandmother in the later stages of Alzheimer's), not a child, in a car that was obviously left running so the air conditioning could be left on, but that is still absolutely unacceptable IMHO. I understand that it would have been disturbing to lots of people to have whoever was there bring her into the stores with them, but either get someone to watch her or plain don't go to the outlet mall - ie., NOT a short run in and grab a bottle of milk type place.

That would drive me batty. I'd talk to the parents.

Thanks Caffiene! That's sweet of you to say. I love my job, except when it exasperates me, lol!
36paws, you're right, and I should have mentioned that. I kind of skipped past the "left alone part". I was just focusing on why the kid might have been screaming. Obviously she should be monitored:)