I have weight falling off of me left and right this week! Woke up to weigh 130.6! My heart jumped into my throat when my digital scale flittered around in the 129s before settling at 130.6, SO close to 120's! I'm not going to change my ticker yet, I like to change is when I can round down and 130.6 rounds up to 131. No biggie, maybe tomorrow. :D

I had a Fage greek yogurt and some almond/craisin trail mix for breakfast, I found a new flavor of the Fage that I had not tried (cherry pomegranate) and I think it's my new favorite!

I also bought the mock (vegan) chicken salad at whole foods because that stuff is delicious and I have some for lunch today. (I added sliced red grapes into it, yum!) -- I'm not vegan, but I used to be and I fell in love with it!

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Indiblue - I would love to post a picture of it! I will get one with my crappy camera phone after work (doing it in the bathroom in the office might be awkward, lol.)

Claire - I already have a baking date planned with a friend for these brownies! I am definitely thinking cherries, too, that sounds amazing! My friend isn't vegan either, but she is allergic to all dairy and eggs! So these are perfect. Thanks! Also, YUM at your lunch, goat's cheese is SO delicious.

Day off from work spent in the warm (but not TOO warm) spring sunshine, taking a long run, and oh, my gosh, I feel amazingly wrung out in a very pleasant way. Now THIS is what we should be focused on, IMHO, making fitness be a relaxing part of a healthy lifestyle. Yes, I've had good news on the scale today, but I care less about that than about the fact that I increased my mileage/time ratio and am going to now settle in for a nap with my kittycat. :)

Hi everyone...

I've been away for awhile and still catching up with reading how everyone is doing.

I'm struggling BIG TIME! 2 Fridays ago I was finally down a pound to 137...I should have been happy about this, but instead I started obsessively reading my old posts and calculating how long it took me to lose that one pound and then got super super discouraged. I've been pretty good at keeping to 1200-1500 calories. I have a cheat meal on the weekends, but I don't just full out binge...yet I am so hungry constantly, and when I drop down to the 1200-1300 range for several days I start feeling like I am going to pass out when I sit / stand up. I know this is mainly blood pressure related, but it's scary when my vision goes each time I stand up off the couch, or I feel like I am going to fall over and have to grip the wall like an old lady!!!

I know weight loss is hard...and reading posts here about having to eat 900 calories a day to lose anything, or doing 2 hours of exercise a day to help, are just even more discouraging to me. It may be reality, but I don't want to live on 900 calories a day in order to lose weight. I would just rather stay the weight I am at. It has nothing to do with a lack of willpower, it's just common sense. I don't want to meal skip, I don't want to eat that low, I don't want to work out for 2 hours a day. I just want to lose 1 pound every two weeks by eating 1300-1500 calories a day and exercising moderately. For my body, and for others here, this seems to be unrealistic and to see any progress drastic measures are necessary.

I don't know where I am going with this...I guess I am giving up. It pains me so much to start to believe that this is the only way i will see weight loss as a feather. Maybe it's because I used to do this when I was younger, that I would basically starve myself for days on end so I could eat out with friends. That I was so busy I would easily go all day without eating. But it all changed for me when my younger sister was hospitalized with anorexia. I couldn't believe I ever did that to my body.

I don't know where I am going with this, or what my point is. I started doing this journey "the right way" over a year ago. I started by cutting back on junk and running and doing tons of yoga. I barely lost anything and I couldn't cut back my calories under 1800 with all the running. So in September i backed off excercise and started dieting. For the first few months, I lost well at 1500 calories, but since January I've been frustarted and stalled and losing really slowly while craving crap I would never even want to eat in the past.

This last weekend was one of my "Goal Weekends" I'd been planning towards since January. I was so sure I could get down to 130 by then. I had a trip planned with friends and I wanted to show up thinner and happier and feeling wonderful. Instead I showed up down 2 lbs and feeling lousy about myself. the whole weekend was spent inside my head feeling fat. I tried to hide behind others when getting my pictures taken - i look like I am going to cry in most of the pictures. I was really, truly miserable with myself for not making my goal. And did I do anything to deserve not making it? NO. I've refused treats and gone hungry and blah blah blah to absolutely no avail.

I guess this is a giant rant...sorry for being miserable, I just don't know where to go from here. I feel like doing weightloss "the healthy way" is useless and "the unhealthy way" isn't for me, but staying at my current weight makes me feel miserable about myself. I don't know where to go from here...my wedding is in 6 months and despite having started this journey a year and a half in advance it's going to be a sprint to the finish line which is probably going to involve me eventually starving myself and living on one of those cabbage soup diets you hear brides talk about. Or I suck it up and be the chubby bride, captured for all eternity in thousands of dollars of pictures my family will purchase and display everywhere.

:( Sorry to be such a downer...I know I am really negative and am not trying to offend anyone...I just need to get this all out.

Wildflower- lots and lots of hugs. Thank you for sharing. I don't know if you just wanted to rant or if you wanted a response - so if you just wanted to rant, ignore EVERYTHING I put below:

You mentioned that you'd rather stay at your current weight forever than take drastic measures, but you also said you are miserable at your current weight. Sometimes the hardest part of weight loss and dieting is learning to love ourselves again. Gaining self-esteem is more important - and frankly, harder - than losing pounds.

I don't want to question you or judge you, but I want to throw this out there: Is it possible that you are stunning and beautiful at your current weight? You may need to come to peace with where you are - healthy - and start considering the rest of the weight vanity/"I'd like to but it wouldn't kill me if I didn't" pounds. It may help give you the courage/strength to stick with a non-drastic plan even if pounds are coming off slower.

This is going to sound really weird, but one thing I can suggest is this: take your fiance shopping with you, and let him dress you for a few weeks. Let him pick out your outfits and just go with it - even if he asks you to wear less inside the house, go commando with a sundress on, or wear something you really don't think fits. Trust him to let you be sexy - and you will feed off his reaction. Nothing will boost your ego like the person you love drooling over how you look.

I can promise you one thing: no matter what, you will look beautiful on your wedding day. I have never in my life - even looking at pictures of someone who is 100+ pounds overweight - seen a bride look ANYTHING but gorgeous on their wedding day.

Wildflower, Mayday has some adorable, nurturing suggestions, and makes some excellent points. If you're getting married to someone you love, you will look beautiful no matter what. And also? At your current weight, you are HARDLY going to look chubby to ANYBODY, believe me! :hug:

I can't think of a one of us who hasn't remarked on here that the less weight one has to lose, the harder it is to lose it. And no, you don't have to do unhealthy things. You may have to accept that things are going to go really, really slowly, though. For my own part (and at your height, I might add), every ten pounds has taken about 4 months. I can't seem to lose more than around a half pound or so per week. I think it's just too hard once you're already in a healthy weight range (which you ARE) to expect the kind of results that people who have far more to lose see.

Here's something I did just today, though, and it made me feel great about what I've accomplished THUS FAR. I took some dumbbells and made a pile of them in the amount of weight I've lost. And then I took all these dumbbells and tried to pick the big stack up. Let me tell you, this was heavy and not easy. And I thought, "I carried this around!" You've already lost what, 15 lbs.? That's not nothing, girl! Maybe if you looked concretely at your already-lost weight as an accomplishment and, with a positive, proud mindset, focused on a specific plan for the rest of it--maybe not all that you'd previously thought about losing, but a PORTION of it--and realized that yes, this is going to take a long time to do carefully and healthfully and at times it might suck a little bit, but being MODERATE about it is the only reasonable way to go.

And again, no matter what, you're going to be gorgeous at your wedding.

Awww...thanks guys, I really appreciate the encouragement. You are right Kat, 15 lbs is a lot.

I am TERRIFIED about wearing a wedding dress because my heaviest part (my arms/shoulders) will be the only thing on display. My tiny waist, smallish thighs and tiny legs are all going to be hidden away for my big beefy arms to be on display. :(

I know it's not the end of the world...and you are right, all brides DO look beautiful and my fiancee thinks I am sexy already. Mayday, you are right about him and that's a funny suggestion to have him pick out my clothes! Ha. I work in conservative job and he's always wanting me to wear something that's trashy/clubby in my mind. So maybe I can't wear that stuff to work, but I can wear it out to dinner, etc for him once in awhile or around the house. :) Cute idea, thanks! And also, yes, it's entirely possible that I look fine already...I guess it's just hard knowing I used to weight 112 lbs in college and thinking how much attention I got then. You are right in that I need to start being happy already...it's just hard sometimes, especially when i've spent the last 6 months obsessing over weight loss.

Hello feathers! Ive been doing pretty decent the last couple days. Eating well, on plan, workouts are ramping up, pain continues to lessen and weight has stayed out of the red zone if no major loss to report (129.2 today). Ill take it!

AND in exciting news, I signed up for my first 5k and am going to try to raise $10k in the next 30 days to support an org I just joined as a board member. Would appreciate any moral, mental, or of course financial support: http://www.nami.org/namiwalks11/SFO/xty


*Dorian5* - feeling up to buying a bikini is a major victory, woo! Not so sure how friendly that friend seems :P I lold with the chunky chicken vs hawk.

*krampus* - listen to your body and worry a little. Id focus less on calorie intake (seems ok at a first pass), more concerned about BP. That is very low and could def be why you feel a little light headed and 'off'. Work on the sodium?

*claire* - welcome!

*minifluffy* - I vote for considering this is a small irregularity and presuming thing are back to normal, maybe skipping weigh in with an agreement you will make better choices this week and weigh in next?

*lackadasiy* - Dont know enough about your workout regime or eating plan, but raising a small (friendly) red flag that you seem awfully hard on yourself. Im guessing the stress of exams and maybe the parental stuff is finally catching up with you. Take a breath and remember you are awesome :)

*indiblue* - Ugh I hate making silly mistakes. But things happen, and if you cant fix it…move on and remember to proof better next time. YAY for staying at 126 and feeling so good about health. That is super.

*Wildflower* - First a big hug. You sound frustrated and boy do I understand. Take a few deep breaths and when you are ready try to be self-inquisitive and analytical about what has worked. Also what hasnt and see if you can figure out why and some alternatives. Maybe we can help? Dont give up. There is *always* a way forward. We just have to figure it out.

Down to 59.0 kg/130.1 lb this morning. 7 pounds of bloat and some fat since Monday and my "fat face" feeling is nearly gone. Last night's semi-desperate snack attack at 10:30 pm (plain yogurt, nori) and having to quit my Tae Bo DVD five minutes in because of BP-related wooziness suggests that I take a day or two of slightly higher caloric intake with more salt.

***

Wildflower, *HUGE HUGS.* I'm so, so sorry to hear about your weekend panning out the way it did. I have been there many times, most recently when my mom was visiting Japan - I couldn't stop thinking about how I was "supposed" to weigh 115 lbs and was in a terrible way the entire time she was here, and I HATE the pictures! It's the most difficult because rationally we know no one cares about our weight except us, but it's impossible to just stop caring. I sincerely hope you can find some answers or at least a little peace; perhaps letting your fiance dictate your self-esteem about looks for a while would be a good idea/would transfer to your own thinking? You are not going to be a chubby bride; you are going to be radiant and beautiful - like you already are.

xty Glad to hear things are going well on your end, esp re: pain subsiding and your 5k! I dumped soy sauce on my dinner and felt better an hour later; coincidence? Probably not. It seems weird and counterintuitive to consciously aim for salty foods, but the average Japanese person eats something like 5,000 mg of sodium in a day (!) and they live forever...

MiniFluffy I love those days where you're dreading weighing and find you haven't actually gained anything. Good news!

kat999 Nothing beats a relaxing day where exercise is just part of your schedule, especially when the weather is nice! Sounds like a perfect day.

Dorian See you in the 120s thread soon, I hope!!! Congrats on the loss!

indiblue AAGGH typos and goofs; hope the readers recognize them as such, which seems likely. I'm really glad to hear you're feeling so good about your health and body - that energy undoubtedly transfers to other areas of your life too. You have lots to be proud of!

Claire California, Vienna, sounds like no matter what, your future is looking bright. I will continue daydreaming about my European life; I have no prospects or connections over there aside from one year of German 101. Not ready to throw in the towel and work as a prostitute yet.

claire Because the chickpeas were subbing for flour, they made the brownies very dense and dry. I sometimes have to cook gluten-free for potlucks and other gatherings and I'm starting to learn that's the most difficult challenge for baked goods without flour. I really love the idea of sneaking proteins into dessert through which is why the bb brownies (flour and all!) sound wonderful to me.

MiniFluffy I am SO happy for you! Kudos to you! I've never had that happen to me- when I feel I've gained I always have haha.

Wildflower :wave: it's nice to see you back! I'm really sorry to hear you struggling. I was having similar hunger problems too at 1200 and not willing to cut cals back. I was having trouble too, and since then IF + reducing carbs to 100-150 g a day/upping protein has done wonders for me. I eat full meals and get in all my nutrients and have been losing slowly, but at least losing. I think I've mentioned those before to you so as usual, comes with my caveat of 'ignore them if they don't apply to you or if you've heard them already!'. The other thing that has made a big difference is switching up my exercise. I was doing 3-5 yoga sessions a week and I think my body just got really used to it. I've cut back yoga to 0-1 time a week and replaced it with lifting and running. I'm pretty convinced this has something to do with it.

All that to say I remember one of the hardest things for you was stress and lack of sleep, so how are those going?? Are you feeling more relaxed and have a bit more time to enjoy wedding planning amidst school and work?

I hear you on the arms versus tiny waist and legs. My upper arms are disproportionately fatter than the rest of my body. It's one of the few places I have a true fat deposit spot. For that reason halter tops and strapless shirts tend to look better on me weirdly enough, I think because it's not a capped sleeve or short sleeve cinching my fat upper arm!

kat your run sounds fabulous, and I totally hear you on using fitness to relax and rejuvenate rather than punish. I'm looking forward to trying to hit 30 mins on the treadmill today, if an old injury I'm trying not to agitate doesn't flare up!

xty congrats on getting out of the red zone! Best of luck for your 5K, it sounds like a great cause.

krampus yay yay yay! You must feel so much better and smaller with the bloat gone. Thanks for the well-wishes on the letters- fortunately at least where I've worked cover letters are only glanced over for key words and phrases so it's likely the spelling typo won't be noticed. we'll see... Let us know how the Great Salt Experiment goes.

--

Well today is my birthday, quarter century. I keep forgetting it actually. I don't like big celebrations so I haven't told anyone here about today. My boyfriend arranged the surprise weekend trip a few weeks ago as my gift, so we will probably just be hanging out tonight at home, which is just fine by me.

Unfortunately my scale looks like it broke this morning. It was giving weird readings so I replaced the battery and now it only reads 188.8 LB ST KG. I put in the old one with no luck. There's no reset battery and I haven't been able to find any help online or on the website or instruction manual.

So... I may have to go without weighing myself for a while after weighing 2x a day for the past two years. That, and I'm out of a scale until I go back to the US (the ones here are really poor quality).

Good morning everyone! I have no idea what I weigh this morning, the beau and I had sushi for dinner and I crashed over there... he has no scale, of course. I went to see if his gay room mate had a scale, but he doesn't. His room mate looks like a Calvin Klein underwear model, what does he care about his weight? *sigh*

Even though we had sushi, and they weren't terribly healthy rolls, we split just 2 rolls and I had fairly low calories from breakfast and lunch and only 1 beer. I may be retaining water, but I know my calories are golden.

Indiblue requested a picture of my hawk tattoo -- I'm not gonna post the actual image in here because I'm kind of in my bra and don't want to offend, but here's a link to it if you want to see it. Please ignore my Godzilla-tits if you can, I've (unfortunately) only lost 1inch in them since I've lost 20lbs. :rolleyes:

http://www.axcessmypics.com/photos/p...e18f02140f.jpg

PLEASE let me see 129's by my official weigh in on Monday! I would be so so happy! (Not likely, I tend to eat over my calories a lot on the weekends.... but at least 129 some time next week!)

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Wildflower I don't know what to say that hasn't been said, except that I've never looked at any bride on this planet and thought that she looked bad at ALL. I know you'll look amazing. It IS frustrating that it's so hard for us to lose, especially the closer we are to goal. I, also, have tiny thighs, a tiny waist, and then just store fat in my chest and my upper arms. :hug: I bet in all those pictures, even if you do look sad, you look hot. And if you asked your fiance he would tell you so! :D

krampus Woohoo, 130.1 is AWESOME! .2lbs away from being in the 120's! Excellent! I should see you there shortly, I hope!

xty Awesome on signing up for the 5k, and staying out of the red zone!

indiblue HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! That does suck about your scale though, I would be slightly panicked without knowing what I weigh each morning. Hopefully you can get it working again??

kat999 I love what you said about the dumbbells, I did something like that the other day at the grocery store with the butter. I was looking at the boxes when it struck me that, wow, ~20lbs of butter would be a lot.... and I lost that much... holy crap. But I think trying to lift something that weighed that much, like you did with the dumbbells, would really help me out on days when I'm feeling hopeless about this weight loss thing.

Have an AWESOME day everyone!

xty - good luck for the 5k! I have a 5k on 22nd May, and a triathlon with a 5k in June so after this half I will be in full 5k training mode!

indiblue! Happy Birthday! Good that you couldn't weigh in on your bday, nothing like a bad weigh in to kill the birthday mojo!

Kat - I love those exercise sessions. I had one of those yesterday too. I left my garmin at home so I didnt get too obsessed with my times, I just enjoyed the run. It was raining though, so it seems like you had a better time!

Dorian - haha I don't know any boys who own scales. When I moved in to my boyfriend's flat and brought my scales with me, he just looked at me like 'erm, why are you bringing those with you?!' They are no buried under the suitcases in the spare room to avoid the 5 x a day weigh in!

I was doing well today, until I started to revise for the exam i've got (in an hour!) I bought some Nervennahrung (chocolate covered nuts, normal nuts, cranberries - 100g packet). I obviously ate the whole packet mindlessly while reading some powerpoint slides. Hmm. 550 calories in 15 minutes as a snack, well done me! I've got to get better at this intuitive eating or i'll be forced back to calorie counting and dieting, and i'd really rather not! Clean slate from now on...

Have a nice day everyone! It is the start of the school holidays here in Vienna, thank god!!!! I just need to get this exam out f the way and then i'm free!

dorian really incredible tattoo, thanks for sharing! I love your new avatar pic. You are lovely.

claire hope you have a wonderful break from school for a bit. Good luck with the intuitive eating- regretfully it doesn't work for me because my body intuits I need about 2700 calories a day to survive, but I hope it works for you because it's definitely better than ccing :)

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Birthday was a bit of a downer in some ways, but that's mostly my fault. For some reason I get a little down on my birthday and I don't know why. My boyfriend was sweet and got dinner and made dessert. We stayed in and watched tv, which is really all I wanted to do. Being abroad I didn't get any phone calls, which is a bummer because birthdays are often a nice excuse to catch up with friends, but I know it's par for the course when you're overseas with an international number. I also didn't get an email or whatnot from my brother and sister which is a bit disappointing, but a few good friends and my ex-boyfriend (who is still a good friend) did send me sweet emails, so that was nice. Sent out two more job applications but have yet to hear from any, which I had said two weeks ago that's all I really wanted- to hear back from somewhere. :( Scale is still broken so I'm not sure what I'm weighing these days. Maybe it'll be a good lesson for me... to just focus on keeping calories down and getting in exercise every day. Hopefully when I weigh in next I'll be down, we'll see.

EDIT: Ten hours later, heard back two from positions in India requesting information for the next step in the interview process. Huzzah! Ok, universe, you're a few hours late, but thank you for fulfilling the bday wishes... fingers crossed for more good news in the coming days.

I understand about the birthday and no phone calls, I don't get any from my family or friends in the UK either. My mum sends me an email and my friends write on my facebook wall...
Good luck for the interview! Sounds all good :)

I'm just preparing for the half marathon tomorrow. I've bought a cool new outfit (purple!) and have charged my garmin and mp3 player. My boyfriend is running with me as a pacemaker and I'm ready to go! We're cooking a massive pasta feast tonight (anti intuitive) and then early to bed fr me! If there are decent finish photos, I'll link them here :D

Have a nice weekend everyone :)

am i considered a featherweight if i need to lose 30lbs?
:D:D

I would say , yes.

More If you relate more to the issues raised on the featherweights forum than others please join us. It's about where *you* feel most comfortable. We'd love to have you around here.

claire I hope your half went well!! So impressed with halfers- 13.1 miles is incredible :)

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Had a birthday dinner to attend last night and a brunch this morning. Ugh. Two big meals in a row :(. I did okay, but not great. Last night the hosts kept filling my wine glass (I only wanted to have half a glass) every time I took a sip. I asked them to stop but they refused so I just stopped drinking the alcohol. Then we toasted the honoree with champagne so I had to have a bit of that. Champagne is very expensive here and difficult to get so I can't just take a sip and waste the rest- it's quite rude. I hate, hate, hate intaking calories I don't want or need :(.

Brunch this morning was weird. I've been practicing IF and have gotten uncomfortable with eating before 2-3 PM. I started eating at 11 AM and tried to just stick with fruit and coffee; everything else was completely carbs and sugar (not like fruit isn't just carbs and sugar... but it was better than the pastries available). I must have had WAY too much coffee because I began to feel extremely jittery and nauseous and have felt almost hungover since brunch :?:. Have eaten only tuna and egg whites for dinner to at least get in a little protein for the day. I still feel blah.

So... two days of not great eating. Looking forward to a bit of a detox for the next few days.

Feathers - I might be MIA for a while, I live in Raleigh NC with my family and yesterday we had so many tornados rip through the area -- a lot of houses in my neighborhood were destroyed, no power yet. Our carport, my mother's BMW, my dog's pen -- everything was wiped out by falling trees! We live in the woods.

Needless to say, I'm getting my exercise hauling chunks of tree trunks around. :)

Food choices are awful since we're not able to cook, lots of fast food. :(

indiblue, you're very sweet, thank you. I hope you're feeling better today than you were on your birthday. I get down on birthdays too.

Hope everyone is doing well!

Happy bleated birthday, indiblue!

Ack, Dorian, be safe! I have friends down there, too. Scary storms! :(

Unproductive run this morning. It was too windy out; I barely got in a mile, and my ears were freezing. :( My speed was terrible. I'm scared to death of my race next Saturday now. *whine*

On the upside, even though I ate a piece of cake yesterday (birthday party for a family member), I was at 115 this morning. I can't even remember the last time I was this small. Maybe... five? Six years ago?! I feel like trying on my secret Super Tiny Jeans, the size 3s I've saved in a special spot in my spare room closet but which I've been too scared to try on. Am I ready for them? AAAAAAA! So scary. :D (The silly thing is, they're so ridiculously out of style now, but I love them and don't care. If they fit, they are coming out of the closet! ;D)

Up 1.5 kg after the weekend, bleh. Saturday was way above calories and yesterday I didn't make the smartest food choices, so I wound up just having one gigantic meal - wasn't hungry for dinner. I think I'll see the 120s before the week is over though! Got in a decent workout last night. I have determined I want to learn the "Melbourne Shuffle" dance move (unrelated to that "Party Rock Anthem" song!), so that's something physical I'll be practicing.

indlblue Happy belated birthday, sorry it was a little disappointing/anticlimactic. If it means anything, I thought of you and wondered how you were doing! It is frustrating too relinquishing control over food at events etc; I am really excited to be back to routine today after a weekend at my boyfriend's.

Claire Hope the half went well! Enjoy pasta. That's really neat that your man runs with you.

Morethananumber Sure! Hope to see you around more.
Dorian5 O_O I'm really glad to hear you're safe but craaaap that's rotten that so much damage has been done to your neighborhood and things. Love the new avatar, you have really ahem "dangerous" eyes :D

kat999 Those runs are the worst, but 115!!! Wow! What kind of jeans are the 3s? I doubt anything could be THAAAT out of style. Is that you in your avatar? Whoever it is, she has a lovely smile! :)

indiblue, happy birthday!! Congrats on moving forward in your job application process. Forget about the scale for now. Not weighing myself every day has been incredibly good for me. Not knowing how much you weigh could even help you with sticking to your plan rather than being preoccupied with what we all know varies unexpectedly.

Dorian -- I'm impressed that you're being so positive. It sounds like you're okay -- I hope things continue to work out well.

Krampus, Congrats on being down to your comfortable weight! It does sound like a little more food & salt might be good for you. Do you track your salt intake (on a calorie counter)?

xty, claire, & kat, I'm so heartened to see how many other feathers are also runners at various levels (I'm still a big n00b, of course). I could never do a half-marathon, but I'm running a 10k tomorrow in a burger suit, which is longer than I've ever run before and a bit scary, but even more exciting. claire, I hope you're out celebrating now and that you update us on how the half marathon went soon.

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Haven't posted for a few days as I tried to get back in control of my eating habits. I was really worried about how many times I slipped up last week and felt unable to stop myself from eating things I didn't really want to eat (i.e the Fiber One bars that gave me a huge, horrible stomachache in addition to putting me over budget. But today will now be my fourth day of on-budget eating (1200-1400) and moderate exercise. I'm so glad to be back "on plan" and feeling sane about what I'm eating and when. Thank you to everyone who chimed in to remind me not to be too hard on myself, that was really helpful :)

Weighed in at 118.5 today after dodging the scale all week during my scary time & recovery -- I'll take it. "Celebrated" by getting my favorite half-healthy indulgent foods at brunch and at an afternoon concert. I even had half a Corona, a big indulgence for me. I usually overeat a lot when I drink, so I am quite proud of myself for only having a small Tex-Mex chicken salad and a veggie burger patty at the bar. My self-control muscle is getting stronger!

krampus, yup, that's me! :D And aw, thank you. :hug:

lackadaisy, good luck with your run! But wait, BURGER SUIT?! That's hilarious! Have a ball, hon. Don't worry about being the best or the fastest, just have fun. :)

A report on my jeans... the size 3s do fit today! They're not as out of style as I thought, just a little lower rise than you might find on the shelves today, but very slim fit, not-quite-jeggings sorts of things. They're maybe a teensy bit more snug than they were back when I first bought them, but I think in a pound or two, they'll fit like they did before. Which is, I gotta say, a huge, huge victory. :carrot:

Dorian I hope everything is OK and you get power back soon... Sounds scary!

Kat Congrats on the super skinny jeans! That is a great feeling! I also have a secret pair I bought by mistake, but I don't have the balls to try them on!

Lacksadaisy Congrats on the self control! It is something I don't possess when I drink, terrible! I was on antibiotics until today, so i couldn't drink anyway but let's see how virtuous I am next time I go out... I bet not as good as you!

My half was great! I pushed myself to the absolute limit, and my boyfriend pushed me further (that didn't end well for him!) but I managed to knock 13 minutes off my time from last year, so score! To be fair, last year I ddin't train very much at all because I had knee problems. I think I got up to 14km in training a few months before, and then couldn't do anything for a few months. I only did the race because I was trying to impress him (we hadn't got together yet...). Haha! So no surprise I did better this year. All I have to show for it now is a medal, photos of me pulling weird 'i'm going to die' grimaces, sore muscles so I walk like John Wayne and impressive sunburn with a bandana mark across my forehead - SEXY!

My eating was pretty rubbish yesterday! Taco salad for lunch with my boyfriend's family (with his brother who ran a marathon in 3hrs 2 mins and was absolutely fine afterwards, unlike me! amazing!), lots and lots of meat at the BBQ party we went to and lots of crisps. Hardly any alcohol though, and i think the crisps were needed to sort my water/salt balance out because I was feeling like absolute crap before I ate them! But according to my Garmin I burned 1600 calories on the run, so it was allowed and today is a new intuitive eating day!

Lacksadaisy Good luck for your 10k! I am intrigued about the burger suit, you'll have to post a picture! 10k is my favourite distance to race though, long enough but not too long. Enjoy it!

Dorian I grew up in the South and went to college in NC so I totally know how much damage those awful April tornadoes can wreck :( So sorry to hear about the power, the car, and the property. I'm glad to hear everyone is safe and hope life can get back to normal soon.

kat I had a bad run too the other day, 10 mins in and I just couldn't go any further! I ended up doing intervals that day. I was fine the following day and today. I wonder what causes those bad runs? Congrats on your 115 low! And YOUR new avatar- you are lovely too!! So many pretty feathers around here.

krampus aw so nice, thanks for thinking of me! I hope you see the 120s this week!!

lackadaisy thank you for the well-wishes! Big kudos on the 118 and maintaining good food choices amidst your half-Corona evening. It's hard to keep alcohol in check and it's really hard to cut it out completely too sometimes; finding that middle balance is key. Can't wait to hear about your burger run!!

claire congrats on the half and your new PR!! Wow so many victories to celebrate around here.

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Seriously continued to feel hungover from my coffee binge last night. It was a waste of a day, food-wise. Today has been much, much better: only water and 110 cal homemade pumpkin bar thing (with soy flour, bran, and lots of fiber and protein yum) so far, followed by a 30 minute/5K run and a bit of upper body strengthening. It's ridiculous how awesome exercise can make you feel. I'll want nothing more than to eat a sensible lunch and dinner today, so I'll do that and be back on track. No idea how much I weigh, the scale continues to be very much out of commission.

Lovely day to you all, feathers!

Part of the problem during mine was the weather. It was crazy windy, and I was running on a bike path next to a river. My ears were full of cold air, and I just felt a little battered around, and of course it seemed like I was always running straight INTO the wind rather than having it at my back. Ugh. Too much resistence. I couldn't even get warmed up enough to where my own energy was keeping me from shivering. Bleh. The only good thing about it was I kept my speed up pretty well while I could still feel my feet, and I didn't get a side stitch. So I suppose I should look on the bright side.

I think other times the time of day and my food intake can adverse affect my energy level. Other times, I just FLY! Those are obviously the runs I love. :D

I've been feeling very quiet lately, like I just don't have very much to say. Eating is fine, think I had about 1300 calories yesterday and I sort of had to push myself to eat something for dinner. This morning's weigh-in was 59.5 kg or 131 lbs, down 1 kg from yesterday, up a pound from Friday. I can't remember the last time I "went."

I wanted to run this morning before work but I just couldn't get out of bed. Got caught in the rain on the way to work and now I'm freezing cold and damp, boo! Tuesday continues to be my least favorite weekday by far. :(

kat999 I can never figure out the science behind "good" and "bad" runs. Hopefully we'll both have some really good ones to report soon!

indiblue Glad to hear you had a better day yesterday - exercise really does do wonders. It's got to be scary not having a scale, but you seem really on top of things so I doubt you'll go off course!

claire Awesome work on the half, you definitely earned that taco salad and then some.

Running the first leg of the Boston Marathon today was SO much fun -- the energy of the runners and the cheering masses was infection. I went a bit slower than I usually train and instead of just jogging at a steady pace, I dashed from side to side giving all these little kids high-fives! The benefits of running in a burger suit, right?

We're all over the news but I especially like this Boston Globe article: http://www.boston.com/sports/maratho...tional_attire/

Congrats on your awesome half marathon, Claire!! I think instead of resting on my laurels after my 10k today I'll try to push for longer runs every week from now on -- it would be amazing to be ready for a half-marathon by mid-summer.

Between carb-loading last night and celebrating Passover Seder today, I've been a bit high in my calories, but, shrug, I like to think I deserved them between LOTS of walking and that hourlong run. I'm looking forward to more regular exercise next week -- just me with no burger -- and staying more on-track with food. Finally bought the "under-120" reward I'd planned for myself -- wunder under pants from Lululemon -- which are are FANTASTIC, but also reveal how much better my thighs and waist could look. It's definitely major motivation to stay on-track and keep recomposing my body.

Lacksadaisy Hahaha cool! How was the burger costume? Respect to you!
I figure we were allowed to be high on our calories, one or two days after a run like that you defo need more food to regenerate..!

I like your reward system, I have a reward system for every personal best I run in a race. I get either Raybans or a new Ipod Shuffle for my 1/2 marathon PB! From today on I am training for my first ever 5k race, which will be nice! Up to an hour of training is much more manageable than 2hrs and interval training is fun!

Kat I hate those days where running just doesn't happen. I had my last one three weeks ago. I went out, perfect weather etc, but I just wasn't feeling it. I turned around after 15mins and went back home. I got ill with strep throat a few days after though, so maybe my body was trying to tell me something!

Krampus I hate Tuesdays too!

I'm trying desperately to get my intuitive eating back on track today. So far, so good (it is 11:30am haha). i've even downloaded a hypnosis cd (Paul McKenna 'I Can Make You Thin') to sort it out. I'm getting pretty happy with my body now so I think I might start maintenance soon. I could tand to lose another 10lbs or so, but if I keep up the exercise and get the intuitive eating down, they might come off naturally. I'm fed up of thinking about how much I weigh...

ps:
Indi I completely agree. Exercise makes me eat so much better! I am just more motivated to not annoy my body with junk food. On the days I don't exercise my eating is terrible! It is a nice feeling anyway, enjoy it :D

Ugh, you guys it's a monsoon out there today! Major thunderstorms, lightning, etc. No run this morning, and my head is killing me. I was starting to get panicky stress from the idea of not getting in enough training for Saturday's race.

But then I read lackadaisy's account of running in a burger suit. And you know what? That's reminding me what it's all about: having fun. My race this weekend is a charity event for Earth Day celebrations and preservation at a local ecology reserve, a park and campgrounds that hosts science programs for middle schools. It's a great cause, and everybody who finishes gets a tree sapling at the end of it. I'm trying to tell myself that if I do this one and get through it (even if my time sucks), I'm going to have done a good deed and enjoyed some nature at the same time, right? Right. If one of our own can run in the biggest marathon in the country wearing a crazy costume for the sake of entertaining others and having fun, who am I to say I'm feeling too wimpy to do a piddly three miles on gorgeous hiking trails just because I might not get in enough "practice" this week? Pfft, practice. I've jogged over a hundred miles this year. I think I've got the practice part down! :D

8 am and I've already eaten 450 calories and am still hungry. I hate those days when I'm a bottomless pit even though I'm eating enough -- I register that it's my body figuring out I need more food just as it gets ready to use more fat, but "the noms" are still a terrible feeling. I might actually be developing sugar highs/crashs again after eating too many sugar carbs over the last two days -- super irresponsible of me in retrospect.

Kat, I'm glad my burger suit run is doing good in the world!! :) You should definitely not worry about training for the weekend run all that much. I mean, run a bit beforehand if you have time/weather to do so -- but it is all about having fun. And I promise that in any race the energy of the crowd will pull you through.

Today was an oddly not-hungry day...I scarfed down my packed lunch (the same salad I always bring) before noon because I just couldn't wait, and then everything was totally fine and manageable the rest of the day despite low calories for me (under 1300). I wonder what I'll weigh in the morning?

GOOD day eating-wise. Some jellybeans that my mother sent from the US did make their way into my diet, but so did Kashi Go-Lean, a homemade pumpkin "cookie"/health bar, yogurt, eggs, etc. I couldn't muster enough motivation to really exercise today, but I did do 25 minutes of intensive yoga to get the heart pumping for at least a little bit.

Now, really hoping I stay on track for the rest of the night. It's one of those critical crossroads in my day where I can either close it out perfectly or completely mess up.

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krampus I also can't wait to see what you weigh... will keep my fingers for you the middle number is a 2!

lackadaisy congrats on your 10K!! It sounds so much fun. It must have been surreal to be in that crowd. Sounds like you're nourishing yourself deservingly after such intense exercise, so good for you :)

claire Ooo maintenance that sounds wonderful! It's nice to hear you're happy with your body. Such a wonderful place to be!

kat I'm playing around with what food works best for my run days. I'm practicing IF and often don't eat anything before my run. Sometimes I'm pretty hungry and consume about 25-50 cals beforehand. Not sure yet what works best...

This might crack you up (or gross you out) but I just read something in a fitness magazine yesterday that recommended "no high-fiber foods 3 days before a big run." (You can probably imagine why they made that rec. ;)) Instead, they recommend a light, high-carb meal or snack before a run. I've often heard folks swear by a half a banana and a tablespoon of peanut butter. Might be slightly more calories than you're currently consuming, but the combination of natural sugar/carbs and protein is very satisfying.

Hey everyone! Thanks for your well wishes, it meant a lot. Power is back as of yesterday, and the yard is cleaned up. :) The insurance people are coming tomorrow to look at the damage. Here is a picture of our yard and my mom's car:

http://img840.imageshack.us/img840/9193/tornado1p.jpg

As you can see, we're VERY lucky those trees didn't fall ON the house itself, just on the carport. :)

As for my weight, I clocked in a 131 this morning, which is .4lbs more than last Friday... but considering the amount of CRAP food I ingested, I'm pleasantly surprised. :lol: Must have worked it off with the yard work.

I'm going over to the boyfriend's place tonight, and bringing my scale to weigh in the AM. Yes, I'm that girl. :o

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krampus Stoked to see what you weigh! We're both 131lbs now, but you'll probably weigh less than me at your next weigh in! We're getting to the 120's SOON I can feel it! I've never had anyone call my eyes "dangerous," but I love it, favorite compliment ever. :D

lackadaisy - Damn the noms to the deepest pit of ****. :mad: I have them today too, I kept shoving lunch meat, of all things, into my mouth tonight - even though I was full. I am totally digging the burger suit as well.

indiblue - I only know if I had a good day the next morning - lol! I end up eating and eating right before bed on days when I think I'm doing great. Nice job on the intensive yoga, even though your energy was down.

claire - great job on your run! Wow!! :carrot: I love to hear that you're getting happy with your body, I can't wait to feel that about mine!

kat999 - SO glad to hear you're getting pumped up about this run and telling stress to take a hike!! You've so got this! I can't wait to hear how you do!!!

XOXOXO to everyone, glad you're all doing so well!

Managing the noms today was definitely harder than normal, especially with my rough start in the morning,. but I actually ended up finishing dinner under 1350 -- (relative) success!

Dinner was especially delicious -- a HUGE bowl of steamed Chinese cabbage, two roasted tofu patties, a grilled teriyaki chicken breast, and a big spoonful of sauteed mushrooms. Literally over a pound of low-carb deliciousness for 340 calories -- yum!! So foolishly proud of myself for resisting cookies / pound cake to actually plan out a good day for once.

This morning I was 0.3 kg heavier than yesterday, boo! But clothes fit fine, face doesn't feel fat and I got in exercise before work. I sort of assumed I'd be the same or heavier going by hunger cues. If I feel like I desperately want to chew off an appendage in the evening, I tend to see the scale move down in the morning. Do any of you have a system for accurately predicting these sorts of things?

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Nice work containing the munchies lackadaisy! That dinner sounds great and I am really impressed by your willpower.

Dorian5 O_o I'm really glad the trees missed the house itself. Who knows what's going on with my weight - bouncing all over the place - but I'm really hoping that I'll at least be 130 even by the end of the week.

indiblue No such luck today, but I'll keep trying. How did your night end? All those healthy foods you mentioned (and the jelly beans) sound fantastic. I'm getting Easter candy in the mail from a Canadian friend soon...eep.

kat That's funny... fortunately my runs are little runs (30 mins/5K) so hopefully I don't have to worry about... er... runs on my runs, so to speak. (Sorry if that was bad, haha). I used to actually do the banana- pb combination and I haven't been lately for various reasons, but it's a good reminder.

Dorian For some reason the photos aren't working for me, but I'm sure the damage is bad :-/. You're right though, it's almost like the worse the damage in the yard/carport the more grateful you are that nothing fell on the house. We had a neighbor lose literally 90 trees on their property in a storm once, their yard was completely full of trees so that you couldn't walk more than a few feet without stepping over a tree trunk, yet none hit their house. Always something to be grateful for. And yes I hear you on the good day/bad day thing haha. Most of my bad days were once good days until about 8 PM.

lackadaisy Your dinner sounds amazing! Congrats on closing out a good day without the cake/cookies.

krampus You mean accurately predicting little day-to-day gains? Not really. I'm not one of those who loses .2 lbs every morning or whatnot. My losses come in big and small whooshes- drops of .6-1.2 lbs at a time. I've gotten used to seeing a series of days like 127.2, 127.6, 127.4, 127.6, 126.6.

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Yesterday ended up well! I had a bowl of 1 c ff yogurt, 3/4 c Kashi, and 3/4 c strawberries and that was pretty much it. I did have probably 3-4 more jelly beans and 2-3 "hot chips" (Indian homemade potato chip things), but that was all. For me, a good night. Phew.

BF and I are going on a trip for the Easter weekend, so I may just pop in once or twice over the next few days briefly to say hello. Hope everyone has a great rest of the week!

Enjoy your trip indiblue - where will you be headed? I completely forgot about Easter.

Thanks to everyone for the supportive comments in response to my giant hysterical rant the other day! I appologize for being so negative in general and after having a bit of a time out / break the past 2 weeks, I am feeling better mentally about things. I think that dieting can really make me crazy...I tend to need lots of breaks!

My new strategy will be to focus on exercise (weights 3 times per week with running and yoga mixes in) and eating more but not a ton (I want to be up closer to 1500-1800 calories but with more protein). I don't know if eating that much will lead to weight loss, even with exercise, but I figure if I can at least boost my metabolism by eating a bit more and having the energy to exercise, I can check how I am doing in a month and adjust downwards again.

Wildflower - I completely get the needing time out in dieting. I get too obsessed with it really easily. I think you'll be fine with 1500-1800 calories and lots of exercise. We have to think about our state of mind as well as our bodies!

I'm focusing on exercise too for the time being and just doing the Paul McKenna rules:
1. Eat when you're hungry
2. Eat what you want
3. Eat slowly
4. Eat consciously
I'll listen to the mp3s every day (when I get my new Ipod!!) and concentrate on maintaining what I've managed so far. I think I'll weigh in every month just to check and if I put on loads of weight then it's back to dieting but otherwise... I'm starting triathlon training tomorrow, I am a bit scared but will think of the extra muscles I'll gain!

I weighed in at 69kg this morning. I had a nice bike tour with my friends around the lake and they didn't believe me when I told them how much I weigh. So that is something to be thankful for!


Have a nice rest of the week everyone :)