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I never quite realized the rampant airbrushing/Photoshopping going on and when I started to read about it, I got really angry. Already beautiful people are being told they're STILL not good enough. I remember seeing a before and after retouching on an ad campaign Madonna did, and they airbrushed out all of her muscles and made her bust look larger, which made me feel super offended. Madonna looks pretty damn good for a woman her age, and to make her look softer and more rounded when she's worked so hard for her muscles is kind of annoying. If women are too thin, they're castigated. If women are too round, they're castigated. If they're too muscular or too soft, doesn't matter, whatever it is it's wrong, and we can't even let models and celebrities look like themselves. I see old issues of magazines from the '70s at the library and I think how much more natural and attainable those models looks were. Well, that's how models STILL look; we just can't tell because of all the retouching! :mad: |
Do you guys go to the Jezebel website? They always have hilarious photoshopping mishaps and then fabulous commentaries about how terrible the jobs are for women's body image. I think the tag they used for these stories is "Photoshop of Horrors." Here's the related website: photoshopofhorrors.com. I also saw the one about the VS model whose literally had no inner thighs. Ridiculous!
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The whole airbrushing thing kills me! Because i hear people comment on that dark shadow that is forever under most people's arms, even when freshly shaved. they flip out saying, EW THAT GIRL NEEDS TO SHAVE! ...I just think most people are used to seeing pictures so airbrushed that the model has one skin tone, just varying degrees of glossy or shiny...like anyone's skin looks like that.
and the thigh airbrushing...oh my god. another killer, because some people expect thighs to not touch together at all...0.o |
I'm almost back guys! 130 this morning though I did give blood yesterday. That means my binge weight is gone gone gone! :D
Thinking about models and airbrushing and things makes me a bit upset. I have to view myself in a non-comparative context or I just feel like garbage. It has to be about how I feel and how I have either improved or slacked off compared to my own standards, or else I'll lose my mind. Sometimes I feel so discouraged about my shape. I used to think I was an hourglass because I had extra fat on my hips and still had waist definition, but now I know I am definitely a lumpy a$$less rectangle with a gut that will probably never go away and linebacker thighs/legs. Luckily, I am very good at dressing for my figure and feel confident in clothes. But it's all stupid, because my boyfriend is attracted to me and apparently a lot of other men are too. Male validation shouldn't be the primary measure of happiness of course, but it helps keep my mind in check on those "I have a sh!tty body" days - "I may have a sh!tty body but XYZ doesn't seem to mind." Why are we women so HARD on ourselves?! |
Seriously... why are we so hard on ourselves?! I entertain myself sometimes because although I feel that I am especially inadequate, if I see someone who is similar in height/weight/shape I'm not critical of her. Why can't I behave that way toward myself? I live my life based on this principle: "You never look as bad as you think you do, but you never look as good as you think you do too" (and by you, I mean me of course). There are days when I think I look great, and other days when I think I look like a flaming bag of crap. That principle helps me to put things in perspective, so that when I'm feeling great I don't think I can eat whatever I want, but when I'm feeling like garbage I know that I still am not as bad as I think that I am.
Krampus, I understand what you mean about men's compliments making you feel good. True, self esteem shouldn't rely on it, but sometimes it's nice to know that other people don't think we're so flawed. On the flaming bag of crap days, my husband will look at me and say, "You're just so gorgeous!" and, while I may not believe it, at least somebody does. |
You know that scene from Beavis and Butthead where Beavis is running around with his shirt over his head because he was on a sugar and caffeine high? Well that's how I felt today when I weighed myself. :dizzy: I was 129.4! Okay so it was after a 13.5 run, but it was after I had very much re-hydrated and eaten so I'm taking it and running with it. :D I hope I'm in the 120's again tomorrow, that would be awesome! This has been such a long time coming for me and I had also been stuck for just over a month at 131.4.
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The Great CORNHOLIO, of course I know it. I feel like that today - my mom's flight landed in Tokyo without fanfare and now I'm waiting for her to text from her rented Japanese cell phone. Well done bananapancakes! I hope that number sticks!
pinkrunner Word! It's something we really need to keep in perspective. Yesterday's blood pressure reading (way down from my last health check, which was when I was 15 lbs heavier and still smoked) reminded me that while I may not be Olivia Wilde in a catsuit, I've been doing my body a lot of good these past few months, even if I'm not satisfied with the scale. My weight and body fat is within the healthy range, I exercise and eat vegetables, I quit smoking, and I never get sick. How "bad" can I really look? |
Totally hear you guys on the airbrush and body image. Seriously I've read enough snarky, witty commentaries by Jezebel to now not even be bothered by photoshopping and airbrushing. It's just straight-up amusing now.
I'm grateful for all the balanced, positive men in my life too. pinkrunner and krampus your guys sound so sweet. My bf does that too. I'll tease him and ask "Why are you always in the mood?" and every time he responds with "Because you're always so pretty!" Being around that attitude, plus growing up with my dad who is the least superficial person I've ever met, and guy friends who are (usually) very respectful towards women are all things I certainly am grateful for. krampus I am so happy for you. Way to get back on track. 120s will feel soooo good when you see them again in just a few days. banana WOW big, big, big congrats! You have lots a ton of weight and have powered through so well in these last few pounds. And a half marathon- way to go! You have so much to be proud of. I'm somewhere in the low 127s these days. IF does a TON of good for my body. I look and feel like my normal self finally and I feel in balance. Good good good. |
Ladies, we are way, way, way too rough on ourselves. I had disordered eating and some serious body dysmorphic feelings in my mid-20s, and I can tell you all it leads to is pain, depression, anxiety, and terrible self-esteem. The media is sexist, sizist, and designed to appeal to the lowest common denominator. Why do we want to live "up" to their standards? Sounds to me like we WOULDN'T, you know? Health and character are beautiful, powerful, and last longer than smooth skin and a perky behind. ;)
Here's the thing. When I weighed 97 pounds, I had guys fawning over me. I smoked cigarettes like they were going out of style, I was taking ephedra pills (soooo dangerous), I wasn't sleeping, I was going out to clubs and drinking too much, and I was living on SlimFast and Diet Pepsi. I had no energy, I had no muscle tone, and it didn't matter if I could fit into a size 2 skirt, I felt awful and my female friends sometimes remarked about things like, "Are you tired today?" and whatnot. I remember once at my university, I stood up too fast in the library from looking at a book on a bottom shelf and almost passed out. That was my clue that I wasn't being healthy and I had to stop. About ten years later, and yes, I'm 23 pounds heavier. And when I quit smoking, I gained to the point where I was indeed overweight and had to do something about it back down the other way. But this time, I had to do it HEALTHILY. Now I'm eating pretty clean, I haven't had a cigarette in over 5 years, I barely drink anymore, and while I may not have guys fawning over me, I do have a husband who thinks I'm pretty hot, and that's all I care about anyway. The last time I hung out with a group of friends, the women remarked on how fit and rested I looked, and one of my guy friends said something about me being pretty. Can I fit into a size 2 skirt? No, nor would I want to, since I would lose the muscular legs that are going to get me through a 5K race here in a few weeks. If I ate much less than I do right now, I'd start feeling crummy and faint all the time again, and I don't want that. I don't want to take dangerous supplements. I want to feel GOOD and to put food and fitness into perspective as part of a happy, healthy life. We're more than our bodies, we're also our minds and hearts, after all. Some of my female role models are people who are traditionally "hot," but many aren't, and many are older. Who wouldn't want half the talent of Meryl Streep or the wit of Tina Fey? Susan Sarandon is in her 60s and still exudes a kind of regalness. My fitness ideal of the moment is Cameron Diaz, a woman in her late 30s who is sporty, fit and has the figure of an athlete with amazing arm musculature. She's never considered fat and yet is not some willowy twig, either. (Not that there's anything wrong with being a willowy twig if you came by it HEALTHILY, of course.) Anyway, sorry to rant. I just do indeed think this retouching thing is crazy damaging to people's self-image. |
You ladies are so right on so many points as usual. The whole airbrushing thing is ridiculous and I just hope I can teach my "tween" to not even give it a second glance. She is athletic and muscular and I hope she stays that way.
Like you all, I am hardest on myself. My husband is my biggest advocate and always tells me I look pretty good for 40! I used to think he had to say that, but you know what? No, he doesn't. I went to the doctor and my blood pressure was 102 over 68 so that was good and she felt I was in decent shape. I do have a nodule on my thyroid. Pretty common, though. I have weighed in at 116.5 for 2 days in a row now. Still no comments from anyone about the weight loss but whatever...like you all said....could be jealousy. I don't care. I am feeling better about myself every day. I even bought some new spring/summer clothes in anticipation of my new improved "whole being." And I even bought some Juicy stuff because even though I have plenty of age appropriate clothes, I really like my fun, flirty stuff, too. My stomach is pretty flat but these darn cankles, lol!! Maybe it's just because I am so freakin' short!!! So, I guess I will embrace my cellulite and my cankles and I will highlight my "assets." Best compliment I ever got (and this was when my daughter was a baby) - a guy who worked at Fairway said "damnnnnnn girl...you're rockin a J.Lo booty - looking good!" I loved it! Kat, I hear you on those bad habits. I took ephedra like they were vitamins and I also nearly passed out, but I did it on an elliptical machine! Good times...not. This time, I vowed to do this the healthy way and set a good example for my daughter. I never smoked and it literally saved my life. So glad you gave it up. Krampus, every time I have caffeine and sugar I become the great Cornholio! |
pinkrunner, " if I see someone who is similar in height/weight/shape I'm not critical of her. " TRUE. I say that I sometimes look like Hilary Duff, because she's a shorty and has bigger arms and legs like I seem to. And when i see people online criticizing her, I am like I think she looks smoking hawt! Plus her face is just so pretty! it sucks that I hear people just say, she has tree trunk thighs ew. It KILLS my self -esteem but I do it to myself all the time. I know I do not need guys "approval" of my body, but I guess it's just a female instinct. My boyfriend says he loves my body and I should believe him because he can't keep his hands off of me.
bananapancakes, I want to give you a big round of applause. I wish I could run more than two miles at a time! And even if you fluctuate now, you can know that the number 120-something is possible! and krampus, w00t. isn't it good to know nothing is permanent! And good for you for knowing that you're doing your body good. same to you kat! I am sorry to hear about what you went through. I know a lot of girls my age who are sort of doing the same thing now. It's like, instead of the freshmen 15, some girls lost that and started going down that path. indiblue, I am glad you love IF! It's almost ..fun? can i say that? to me anymore to fast and then eat a nice meal! part of yesterday and today I am in a fast so I can enjoy some Thai food and my own carrot cake in celebration of my two year anniversary with the BF. haven't weighed myself in awhile but i have been liking what i see in the mirror, even dressing room mirrors! :) OH and my ideal body type is basically pin up model. I watched the movie on bettie page a few times and each time it just made me smile. She was so confident of her body and had so much fun with it. She was also fearlessly sexual, something else society has against women still. this also makes me think that we need to remember there is no one ideal body type. and if we all looked like that (whatever it is)..life would be boring. everyone has different tastes and no one is right or wrong in that! |
Krampus... I'm glad you're doing well again, and that you realize what good you are doing for your body! I've tried to lose weight before but I've NEVER felt as good as I do now, with working out 6x a week, even if it makes this weight loss a little stubborn.
Anyways, I FINALLY saw the scale move! I've been bouncing between 126.5-127 for a MONTH. I gave up drinking for lent, and maybe that did the trick, because this morning AFTER breakfast I weighed 125.8! I haven't seen 125 since I was 16! Hope you all have a wonderful day. :-) |
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I think you can be gorgeous at any age and size. One of my fittest friends in terms of flexibility and cardiovascular endurance is technically obese. But damn if she doesn't run circles around me on the track, and she's also just an incredibly swell, awesome, funny, smart lady. If anybody ever made negative comments about her appearance in front of me, they'd get a shoe in the face. |
I'll be honest, I have never been unhappy with my body. Annoyed that I let myself gain a bit, yes. But for some reason I don't see the skinny tall airbrushed models and want to be like them. Like I said on the last page, I have a "compact' figure with a lot of stuff crammed into a small amount of space :) interventionn I have a very similar body type to Hayden Panettiere (I think I also mentioned that on the last page of this thread, sorry for repeating so much) and I also see TONS Of people trash her body in online forums- she's too fat, her arms are weirdly short and thick (we seriously have the exact same arms, it's crazy), her thighs are too big, etc. I don't know why but for some reason I really couldn't care less. I love having a short small frame with muscles and feminine curves. I could stand to lose a few pounds and tone up a bit more, but my body shape and all of its quirks (I'll always have short thick arms) has never been a concern for me at all.
I almost feel bad posting things like this on 3FC because I know a lot of people struggle with body image and I'm prancing around saying how content I am. I guess I feel like the more people who openly say how much they like their own unique body shape with its quirks the more mainstream it will become to see the beauty in your own self and others. |
indiblue, you have nothing to apologize for. :hug: Yours is the attitude we all should have and also extend to others as well! The idea of "I'm okay, you're okay" seemed to die with the 1970s, but it's a viewpoint that I think is sorely needed in this day and age!
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