looking thinner than I am
 

let's just say I carry my weight well...okay, maybe a little too well. I seem to have very prominent bones & even when I still have weight to lose, I look like I don't. (even when I was at the high end of average BMI, my collarbone, ribcage etc "stuck out" And now that I'm almost at goal...you can only imagine the comments/looks/concerns I'm getting. My spine, shoulders, ribcage, collarbone & hipbones...pretty much all the main "outside bones" show VERY easily. I typically look 10-20 pounds lighter than I am, so people worry way too much too soon.

Has anybody else had to deal with this? Stories, advice, hugs?

Honestly, your BMI is quite low. I'm 2 pounds above "healthy" on the BMI scale and I have prominent bones showing. What are your problem areas that make you want to lose more weight?

biggest problem area?...probably my head.

Uhh... ok.

I mean that I know my thinking is distorted & I'm not sure why I want to lose the weight I want to lose.

Hi hippy!
I understand where you're coming from, honestly. Whenever I have been within 20 lbs of my normal BMI, people start commenting that I am too thin, etc. Of course, right now, I am not even close to that, but people already think that I have lost much more than I really have.

I guess I am a little curious also as to why your goal is so low? I am also 5'6" and I decided on 130 to put me right in the middle of my healthy BMI. I believe under 117 is considered underweight for women of our height. 120 is very close to that. You certainly don't want to have the other problem of being underweight, because then you also have issues with food that can be unhealthy.

I am certainly no one to tell anyone else what to do. I am just suggesting that you might want to look in the mirror and as the above poster asked, "where are the problem areas where you still want to lose weight?" Try to take an honest look at yourself and be kind to your body. It sounds like you have done great and you may be at a good maintenance weight. Only you can decide that though.

Whatever you decide, you've done a terrific job!

120 pounds at 5'6" will be on the skinny side for most people and others around you have not adjusted to your current thinness, so you will likely continue to have comments. You probably look great at your current weight, but, if you really want to go lower, be sure to do it by eating healthily and not starving yourself. You can regain if your goal makes you look too gaunt or it proves too hard to maintain. Good luck.

Maybe you're just big-boned and intended to be heavier than other people your height. It happens. Weight is just a number, focus on how you feel.

I agree, I think you're just big boned. At the weight I'm at now (110 as of today, yay!) you can hardly see any of my bones, and I still have plenty of fat to cover them, IMO.

Also, the people that make comments that you're too skinny are probably just jealous. I've had people say that to me my whole life, and their usually fat, jealous people, at least that's what I think....

Originally Posted by hippy27:
I mean that I know my thinking is distorted & I'm not sure why I want to lose the weight I want to lose.

Hi Hippy,

I am your same height and have your same goal, but of course we have different bodies.

Why don't you take a couple months off from losing and focus on maintaining for a while? You've done a great job -- 25 lbs lost! -- and you are at a healthy weight. Maintenance is a whole 'nother journey (I've been basically maintaining in the low 120s since early July -- my "goal" is more of, "hmmm, I'd like to get there, but anywhere under 125 is fine.") You could maintain through the holidays, and then after the new year re-assess where you are and where you want to go. You have a whole new body to get used to, and maybe living in it for a few months will help you consider if/why you want to lose any more weight.

:hug:

Your weight is nobody's business but your own (whether you're fat/normal/skinny) but what you're expressing in this thread is a little bit alarming. You yourself are saying that you think it may be all in your head. If you realize your thinking is distorted, you may need to take a step back and check yourself. Perhaps there are some underlying issues that have nothing to do with weight loss at all. Perhaps there are some issues with body image and self-perception.

As someone who has a lot of experience with ED-variety issues, it sounds a little too familiar for comfort. I think everyone here wants to be the best that they can be, but no one wants to encourage unhealthy habits or thinking.

First of all, I'm not big boned. If anything, I have a small frame.

Second, as for maintaining for now & reassessing...I'll consider it. I'm seeing an eating disorders counselor & we have been trying to figure out why I want to lose weight.

I don't want anyone to think that by talking to me or supporting me they're encouraging unhealthy thinking. I may be a little disturbed now by my previous ED troubles, but don't leave me in the dark just because I have yet to see the light.

hippy - that's not what I meant at all! In fact, ED-related issues or food issues are inevitably lumped in with this whole weight loss thing, and ignoring them just makes them worse.

If anything, we should talk about them, as much as you're comfortable with. I'm glad you recognize that that's what they are. And moreover, I'm glad you're seeing someone for it, too. Really glad.

Best of luck to you. I know it can be a struggle every day. Like I said, since I have some experience where that's concerned, I'm always willing to listen and offer support. :hug:

Man, I'm jealous, OP. I carried my weight okay when I was larger, but I carry it pretty terribly now. I'm down 40 lbs (with 46 left to go) and all I've done is kinda...shrink a bit in a couple areas. I'm hoping the inches fall quicker as I get smaller (as I'll be losing a larger percentage of my body weight per pound), but I'm kind of afraid it'll never really happen and I'll be "skinny fat." But I'm working out, lifting weights 3 times a week and cardio for 5-7. Hopefully it'll get going soon.

I don't have any stories or advice, as I've never had this problem, but hugs I can do! :hug:

I guess just let people know you are healthy and will continue being healthy. They care about you and will naturally worry somewhat.

Hey Hippy, hugs and hugs to you.

I did that too.
when I lost weight last time (30lbs, 6 years ago) I lost more weight than I needed to just because I was so excited about getting thin. It was just fun to look great in my clothes and be fit.

I didn't have an ED, I was just having fun. Then I gained a little (4 lbs) back and looked better.

So don't worry, but listen to your good friends.