I know that you are a college student, like myself, and prone to making bad food choices. I know that you are 100lbs overweight yourself, and aren't really working to adjust your eating habits at all. I know that I can't force you to change. So will you please stop trying to keep ME stuck on my own old habits?
Can we NOT go out to eat all the time? Do we HAVE to go wherever YOU want (which is always Mcdonalds, not Subway, the healthier option.)
When we go to the steakhouse to celebrate Christmas, that's fine. But do we have to do it on the same day as the campus's food-driven Christmas party? Can you please not berate me for counting calories before, during, and after each meal, snack, and drink? Can you please not encourage me to NOT work out when I whine about it?
I know we've talked about this before, and I know it really upset you. So I guess I'll just post this to a lot of strangers. At least THEY understand the boat that I am in, and how mad and disappointed in myself I am upon seeing that gained two pounds this morning.
Sounds like you need some new strategies to deal with this friend...like...
"Oh, McDonalds doesn't really sound that great...how about (X healthy place where a better choice can be made)?" And if the response is something along the lines of "But I want McDs" you can say "OK then - I'm going to pass. See you after lunch!!" or preferably, if there is something nearby, "OK, you go into McD's and I'll go get my lunch at Subway and we can meet on the bench in the park to eat".
or
"That night isn't good for me, since I'll be catching up on some things after the Christmas party. How about next Saturday?"
or
"I'd love to have dinner with you, but I already bought groceries to cook and I don't want them to go bad. Why don't you come over and I'll make dinner for both of us!" (and then you make something tasty and fabulous AND on plan, and you never mention it being low cal or on plan to the friend, you just serve it up).
And when I was in this situation, I had to stop discussing eating/exercise with a few people. Period. No whining about the gym, no discussing calorie counts, nothing anywhere in front of them that would give them something to complain about.
Sometimes you just have to say no- and sometimes you have to cut or tone down friendships.
I have a great friend- but he loves to eat out- when hubby and I started eating healthier we'd always give in and go eat out with him- now we just keep saying "oh no we already ate" or "oh well we have dinner planned but you are welcome to join us." One day I also told him we aren't eating out like we used to- he's welcome to come over AFTER he eats his dinner- we haven't seen much of him since then and I totally understand he likes to eat out so he probably is doing it with someone else now lol.
I'm sorry, that totally sucks! Before I realized that I needed to lose weight (although I knew, I was just in denial) my mom and I would go out to eat all the time and eat like crap. Then she had weight loss surgery and had no appetite and never wanted to go out to eat anymore. It hurt that she was losing weight and I wasn't and she had self control and I didn't. So maybe that is what your friend feels like. I finally saw the light and now I feel awful for trying to sabotage my mom. So my advice is to hang in there and stick to your guns and you may end up doing your friend a favor too.
I have had friends like that in the past. You need to remember that just because she wants to go to McDonald's, you don't have to. Try to not spend meal times with her, try to find other things to do when you hang out that doesn't involve food.
Ahh sweetie=/ I understand completely <3 I have a couple of friends who are similar >_< They eat alot of junk food, and so when they offer it to me and I turn it down, they continue to try and force it on me¬_¬ I know that it's like, kind, and they mean well, but it's hard to say no. Last week she bought me a double snickers bar because she was having one herself; a nice sentiment...but 500 calories D: For chocolate! I put it in my bag and gave it to my dad when I go home >_<
Ahh, I rambled, sorry~
Back to you problem; Mandalinn had some very good points; just use excuses to gently push your friend away until she understands that you are doing this for YOU.
Feeling self-hate and sabotaged!
