How long does it take to not want my old life back?
I've been skirting around the issue a bit, wondering why I didn't have more motivation and why I was always obsessing and thinking about food or exercise.
But, here it is:
My old life was pretty good. Before I started exercising, I just felt like a blob -- but once I started Turbo Jam and C25K, I was feeling great about myself, even though I was still eating whatever I wanted: Chick-fil-A, Easter candy, cookies, ice cream, desserts when we went out to dinner (often).
Despite all that, I was maintaining at 135 - 139 and fit well in my clothes -- though my body didn't look as great as I wanted it to look and I didn't love the way I looked in my clothes.
So now I'm still exercising, and I love that (and never want to give it up!), but I'm having so many problems with my diet. My husband and I are used to eating out regularly (at least 4x per week between lunch and dinner). We both love sweets and ice cream, and he's not giving either up anytime soon. (He's worse than me on these fronts, and I am becoming fairly good at turning things down when he's eating them.)
I've changed our diets for the better: we were already on wheat bread, but now we've switched to whole wheat tortillas, brown rice, lowfat cheese, etc. While we rarely ate fast food in the first place (just the occassional Chick-fil-A, which isn't that bad for me if I skip the fries, and maybe a McDonald's breakfast), we've really been trying to avoid it except when absolutely necessary (and I haven't found such an emergency yet). Those are changes that I want to keep.
But there's other things that haven't quite grown on me yet. For starters, I have no idea how to count calories when we eat out. Because I do have an obsessive personality, it kills me to know that there's a huge knowledge gap in my ability to count calories when we're eating out. So I feel guilty about going out, which just ruins the whole experience.
Second, I kind of miss my old life, when I just ate what I wanted when I wanted it and didn't think twice. I know I ate too much and even had the occassional mini-binge, but I wasn't always WORRYING about and planning food.
Please don't confuse these concerns with a lack of drive to make these changes. I know that my metabolism will start slowing down soon -- I'm almost 26 -- and also that I need to eat more healthy foods for ME and for my body in the future.
But I just kind of miss the junk and the freedom. When does that stop?
I read in another thread somewhere on 3FC that it takes 21 days for something to become a habit. I can't remember exactly how long it was for me, but I don't think it was more than month before I felt like counting calories was something I could do.
For me, it isn't so much that I don't miss my old diet anymore, it is more that it is a trade-off I am willing to make. Maybe this isn't where you are coming from, but I was really unhappy with how I looked and had been since I was a kid. From the time I was in junior high on, I don't remember looking in the mirror and being happy with what I saw (except for one short summer when I was dealing with huge emotional issues and practically didn't eat). There were so many clothes that I just couldn't wear. I flat out could not find dresses that fit me and it was getting harder and harder to find pants and shirts that fit. The latest styles just looked terrible on me. Being able to put on clothes, look in the mirror, and feel good about what I see is a trade-off I am willing to make in exchange for my old diet. I thought I was destined to feel like the chubby, dumpy girl forever; I like knowing that I'm not that person anymore more than I miss my old diet. I think I started feeling this way within a couple of months, as soon as the first five lbs came off and I could see a difference in the mirror.
Also, calorie counting can see overwhelming in the beginning but I adjusted to it pretty quickly. Like I said, within a month, it started to seem pretty doable. You get to where you know the calories in all the foods you eat regularly and you also know how many calories you want to allocate to meals and snacks, so that you don't necessary have to log everything right away to stay on track. I know my breakfast is going to be around 200 calories, my lunch will be around 300-400 calories, and dinner will be around 300-400 calories. And, for the most part, I like the foods I eat. I look forward to eating most of them. I'm trying new foods all the time; foods that I'm not in love with, I don't eat again. I'm frequently very excited about what I'm eating.
Restaurants are a problem. I didn't eat out a lot before, so for me it wasn't a big sacrifice to just cut them out. Now, I only eat out for social purposes--e.g., meeting friends for dinner. If it's just my SO and I, I pretty much always make dinner.
One solution is to eat at restaurants that provide nutritional info and/or that have low calorie options on their menu. Many of the nationwide chains have nutritional info available on their website. Visit http://www.dwlz.com/restaurants.html for some of them.
Another solution is to start getting more demanding. Ask the restaurant to give you more information on how your meal is prepared. Ask them to grill instead of fry, serve dressing and sauces on the side, substitute a salad for fries, etc.
My husband and I are used to eating out regularly (at least 4x per week between lunch and dinner). We both love sweets and ice cream, and he's not giving either up anytime soon. (He's worse than me on these fronts, and I am becoming fairly good at turning things down when he's eating them.)
We eat out a LOT too and I've learned to ask to cook my food as plainly as possible, that way if I ask for poached salmon, well it's plain, with no sauces that I have no idea of what the ingredients are, so it's easy to count the calories there. Same with salads, dressing on the side please... baked potatoes are usually soooo large that I cut it in half... Now if I go for Chineese food, which is what is happening this weekend, I'll forget about counting calories for that day. My meals before my Chineese supper will plainer than usual, which is pretty darn plain , and I just do the best I can... I'll eat only the veggies with little or no sauce on them, plain rice, plain chicken... I'll pick at the foods till I have one plate full then walk away...
As for the food that the rest of the family brings in I politely tell them to bring it to the basement and hide it ... IF I find it, it wasn't hidden well enough and I send them to hid it again ...
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I wasn't always WORRYING about and planning food.
It gets easier with time, I don't agree with the 21 day rule though... I have been at this weightloss/maintenance forever it seems and there are times, that no matter how long I've been with my new habit, that I fall off and want my old ways back...The difference is that I have less of a difficult time picking myself and getting back on track....
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But I just kind of miss the junk and the freedom. When does that stop?
I don't think there's a specific answer for that one. I don't miss the junk per se, but there are times that I have the junk and feel so sick afterwards that I think I'll never do this again, but bam a few months later I try it again... The diffirence again from the old me is that those episodes are few are farther between. The last time I had a fast food burger was 15 years ago, a super plain burger, nothing on it... I burped it ALLL afternoon, THAT I remembered and I haven't had one since.... Certain foods seem to make an impact on me more than others...
Second, I kind of miss my old life, when I just ate what I wanted when I wanted it and didn't think twice. I know I ate too much and even had the occassional mini-binge, but I wasn't always WORRYING about and planning food.
But I just kind of miss the junk and the freedom. When does that stop?
Some people can be totally gung ho about exercising and watching what they eat. However, I feel that there are those of us who will always miss the freedom of the old lifestyle (myself included). A few months ago, I started buying doritos and ice cream and doughnuts, thinking I could eat them in moderation. Well, I was wrong and gained back 15 pounds. I've since cut those foods back out of my diet, which did get me more motivated to work out, and I've lost 10 of those 15 pounds (I'm currently around 127).
As sad as it seems, I'm going to have to live like this for the rest of my life. Maybe I can go out to eat and indulge occasionally, but I don't think I'll be able to have those "freedom foods" in my house without gaining weight. I know this isn't very encouraging, but at least you can know that there are others out there struggling with the same issues and getting through it all.
It's funny -- I think the transition is happening already, and it's only been a week since I thought I'd never miss the way I used to eat!
I still think about it once in awhile because I really was healthy and happy despite having a sweet tooth (and over-indulging when we went out to eat often), but I know I can be healthIER and happIER if I stick to a good eating plan.
I've been craving candy less and less and haven't had anything sweet since Thursday. It feels good. When I went grocery shopping today, I was much less drawn into the junk foods than I usually am.
I know it'll always be a struggle to overcome my cravings, but I'm more confident now that I'll be able to make smart choices and only give in on the rare occassion.
Several months ago, I had some thoughts about missing those "carefree" eating days. I think most of us who were never more than 30 or 40 pounds overweight have never really just eaten anything and everything with complete abandon. We've always had some degree of moderation in eating...it just wasn't really something that we focused on, and we didn't wonder and worry about indulgences here and there. It's been a little while since I've thought about those past days seriously...It may surface again...Maybe it's one of those things that happens every once in a while. More time has also elapsed since my last thoughts about reverting to the "old ways", so maybe as time goes on this is less likely...Maybe I'm forgetting about how I used to eat???
Several months ago, I had some thoughts about missing those "carefree" eating days. I think most of us who were never more than 30 or 40 pounds overweight have never really just eaten anything and everything with complete abandon. We've always had some degree of moderation in eating...it just wasn't really something that we focused on, and we didn't wonder and worry about indulgences here and there. It's been a little while since I've thought about those past days seriously...It may surface again...Maybe it's one of those things that happens every once in a while. More time has also elapsed since my last thoughts about reverting to the "old ways", so maybe as time goes on this is less likely...Maybe I'm forgetting about how I used to eat???
Tara D: I gotta disagree with that one. I have only been overweight (it is more where I gain my weight than the weight itself) for about 3-4 years. Before that, I ate whenever and absolutely whatever I wanted...total junk food usually. Poppins, I can relate. I guess I have to attribute mine to age catching up with me. As for restaurants, we go out a lot also. If you're like me, you have the same group of restaurants that you frequent. Pick a healthy meal at each one and just order that every time you go...that way there is no thought about what to order (which leads to temptation). The only restaurant I can't order a low fat option at is the local Mexican restaurant (is there anything low fat in a Mexican restaurant?). Last night we went to a family style burger restaurant...I ordered a blackened grilled chicken sandwich with no mayo (the bread was white bread though) and skipped the fries, onion rings and Coke. It was tough watching everyone eat fries around me, but by the time I got through my sandwich I was feeling somewhat satisfied and only had 2 fries off my daughter's plate!
How long does it take to not want my old life back?
, and I just do the best I can... I'll eat only the veggies with little or no sauce on them, plain rice, plain chicken... I'll pick at the foods till I have one plate full then walk away... 
tell them to bring it to the basement and hide it 
... IF I find it, it wasn't hidden well enough and I send them to hid it again 
...
