COMMON EMOTIONS that tempt us to eat when we're not really hungry ...
EMOTIONAL UPSETS ~ are any kind of "feelings" that cause an emotional reaction or response from us from the stresses of life. It could be something as simple as being cut-off by another driver on the road, or grieving the loss of a loved one or friend. Most offenses come at the hands of those we are closest to -- like our family members (ie spouses, children, parents, siblings, in-laws, and extended family members), as well as friends, neighbours, and co-workers, etc. [BTW, I am NOT talking about mental illness here; but simply emotional responses to various kinds of stress.]
HURT FEELINGS/INSULTS ~ someone says or does something; or doesn't say or do something that leads to being offended. How do we respond to being hurt -- using food is not the solution. We need to find better ways like journalling our feelings; talking to a friend or anyone that will understand; or, discuss it with the person who offended you, if possible. I think this is esp important when dealing with a spouse or other close family members. Tell them how you feel and what you expect in the future; but don't leave it too long, or the hurt can fester and lead to binge/emotional eating.
SADNESS ~ tears are one of the healthiest inborn ways of handling sadness; expressing our sadness through talking or journalling are very good too. DO NOT AVOID SADNESS -- sadness is a normal part of being a human being in an imperfect world. Some people take meds to "avoid feeling their feelings" -- like feeling sad, or when grieving; and they wonder why the meds don't work.
Many people do not realize that occasional depression is really just sadness that lingers a while; if this goes on for more than three months, seek help. Talking to someone really helps; and counselling is the best remedy. In some cases, there may be a physical/chemical cause that may need meds; see a doctor for this. NOTE: some people ask for meds when what they really need is counselling, and/ to make some changes in their life situations.
FEARS ~ we have many fears in this life; some are founded, but some are not -- often they may be exaggerated too. Talking about your fears with someone & journalling are very helpful; as is facing or acting out against your fears, ie getting back on a bike or horse again after a fall. Deal with your fears as soon as possible.
ANXIETY ~ although anxieties feel very real at the time, they may be unfounded and/ exaggerated (see FEARS). You can talk about them with someone who can reassure you; journal them; or pray about them, but I think the best one is to WAIT THEM OUT -- as in THIS TOO SHALL PASS ... Sometimes, there may be a real or physical cause to anxiety; so check that out too (ie during menopause: caused by a hormonal change in the body) ... In severe cases, you may have to take meds temporarily; as the symptoms often ease up with time, or when your circumstances change. (see also worry, below)
DISAPPOINTMENTS ~ we all suffer disappointments in this life. Some are because people let us down, so that is why the bible says "not to put our confidence in man, but in GOD" ... also life can disappoint us; we can end up jaded or disillusioned when things don't work out how we'd hoped.
We have to be very careful about having "UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS of PERFECTION" -- esp from our relationships, people, work, GOD, and life. Discuss your expectations with others to make sure they are reasonable, to prevent this from happening again. Try not to take disappointments too personal, as sometimes they are caused by things beyond our control. Try not be so hard on yourself & others. Do what you can; but keep believing and trying, no matter what ...
ANGER ~ this is one emotion that people (esp women) often feel guilty about and try to avoid, but anger can be a good emotion, as long as it doesn't get out of control or go on too long. There is such a thing as justified anger. We need to EXPRESS our anger -- talk it out in a rational way; journal it; wait it out; or pray about it, then make a choice to move on ...
WORRY ~ worrying is being anxious about something that may or may not have happened yet. A lot of people worry when they shouldn't, and when they don't need to. Sometimes, there may be a genuine concern about someone you love; but, don't waste precious time & energy on "what ifs" and "what might have beens" ... Life has enough real problems, so don't borrow trouble from tomorrow that will most likely never occur. Praying helps a lot, as does distraction (keeping busy), and talking to a good friend or counsellor.
BATTLE FATIGUE ~ is a kind of exhaustion or burn-out when we've worked really hard (maybe even too hard) to achieve something, but don't see enough results or rewards. You often see this in jobs/careers, or when trying to regain your health or losing weight etc. Sometimes taking a rest for awhile helps, as does utilizing a new plan or strategy -- looking to others for some new ideas & encouragement & support.
FRUSTRATION ~ is hard to describe, yet it is a perplexing feeling that can come from many situations as mentioned above -- when you are trying to achieve a goal(s) and encounter stalls, delays, or even find blocks in the way. Be creative and look for some new ideas, strategies, methods, solutions & support from others who have found wisdom from similar experience. Making the choice to persevere is also very helpful here.
GUILT ~ may be founded or not; often it is exaggerated or even misguided. Either way, I find turning guilt & shame over to GOD is very helpful; the bible says that JESUS took all guilt & shame to the cross for us -- so, lay it at His feet.
Often parents feel guilty, or blame themselves when their children have difficulty, but they have to realize that everything isn't their fault. Sometimes children make unwise choices, but they need to learn from them. You can only protect them so much & you can warn them but ultimately, you cannot live their lives for them.
We must set down healthy rules & boundaries in our relationships (esp in marriages & families). Moreover, we also need to learn to forgive ourselves & others (often), so that we can heal and move on; and we need to know when it's time to let go ...
SORROW/GRIEF ~ is a kind of sadness that relates to a great loss: like having to adjust to losing a loved one or beloved pet, a job, or marriage, etc. This is a very difficult life experience; and it takes time to heal. It is a necessary feeling to help us go on, so don't try to avoid it. GOD gave us a built-in comforter -- healing tears; so don't try to suppress them, as they can help you a lot. Tears help us to release our sadness ...
Prayers, meditations & singing; working or resting; gardening & hobbies; journalling; talking & sharing can all help in this regard. You may even want to join a grief group, or get some grief counselling, as many people find this helpful. While you will never forget, it will take some time to work out all your feelings, and ease the pain of your loss.
There's a lovely saying that goes ... THE BEAUTY REMAINS, BUT THE PAIN PASSES. This is so true; as times goes by, the pain eases and the beauty of that person or pet remains with us, in fond memories.
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NOW, let's get down to the brass tacks, so2speak -- here are several clear, every day examples of major emotional stressors that are very common to us all ...
You have some problems at work (maybe a disagreement with a boss or co-worker); you have a spat with your spouse or teenager, or a friend (or anyone really); one or both of your parents or siblings were overly-critical or even mean to you; you lost a loved one or a beloved pet; you lost your job; you found out your spouse was cheating on you or wants a divorce, or you are going through a break-up or a divorce; you have a rude encounter with someone (say in busy traffic); or a car accident; you or someone you love becomes ill; or you were/are the victim of abuse or trauma of some kind; or you are moving or getting married ... and so on.
The most important thing to remember is -- TO FEEL YOUR FEELINGS ... DON'T EAT YOUR FEELINGS; and don't TRY TO BURY THEM or AVOID THEM with food. Women have great trouble with this -- some where, some how, some way, we learned to stuff down our feelings with food. We may have seen our parents doing this (I saw my mother & my gramma do this). Some people drink or take drugs even; or chain smoke like fiends.
(BTW, this may have started with nurturing patterns or actions when we were babies: upset baby -- shove a bottle in it's mouth). Let's face it -- food tastes good and is very soothing; some people even say that "Food is their drug of choice".
Do we somehow feel it isn't lady-like or polite to be angry? Are we afraid of losing control? Are we ashamed to show our feelings? Are we embarrassed to let others see us cry, or know how much they have hurt us? Are we afraid of looking silly or weak or unstable? Are we fearful of confrontations? Do we feel powerless in our life situations? ...
It's all avoidance, or trying to cover up, or hide our true/real feelings. We must face them & feel them, so we can heal.
THE SOLUTION: We must look for *practical and creative* ways to deal with our feelings each & every day. It does take practice, but in time, you can handle them better. You can learn not to turn to food to console yourself. You can even learn ways to prevent some upsets in the future, as mentioned above (ie, setting boundaries in your life & relationships). Write up a list of *strategies*, using some of the ideas here to help you.
*We need to find healthy ways to deal with our hurt feelings. We need practical solutions (like setting some rules & limits) & real comforts (like hugs) that don't involve food or other substances. Give yourself permission to FEEL YOUR FEELINGS; and then EXPRESS THEM as needed ...
Talking & sharing, finding support from others; counselling (including intervention and/or mediation), journalling or writing (as in poems, stories or songs), listening to music, singing, praying, praizing; meditations & affirmations; sports & exercising; working, gardening; resting and/ sleeping; distraction, walking, reading, playing, crafts & hobbies; making positive changes (including setting boundaries &/ ending unhealthy relationships & making new friends); volunteering; sight-seeing or vacationing; and taking time-out or waiting, can all help us deal with and heal our emotional issues.
I have often seen members here ask for advice on how to deal with real life stressors they encounter each day; and they get some really good ideas from other people's life knowledge & experience. You may have some more ideas too -- expand this list as you like ...
SHIRL ~ glad you found us over here; come on over and visit us in the March Christian Encouragers Chat Thread. Love to have you join us there ... 
Justwant2Bhealthy , 03-16-2011 09:44 PM
fight2winthis , 07-15-2011 09:26 AM
ROSEBUD was from an old classic movie I saw many moons ago, and is a nickname my DH calls me now & then ... 
will fllee from you ...
shine in ... that is, let GOD's LOVE shine into your heart & mind & soul -- through Praise & Thanksgiving, and then you will be healed & transformed! 
Allura Beatu , 11-11-2011 01:37 AM
