Workout buddy issues.
 

Ok. So a friend of mine works out at the same gym as I do and the problem is that she seems not as committed to working out. I want to lose weight and know this is the only way to do it, but I rather enjoy working out when I'm in the middle of it. I like doing weights after as well. The problem is that I am not a social workout person.

I want to work out, concentrate on that. It's not social hour for me. Today was the first time she waited for me to get done with my cardio and she was so chatty that I got annoyed and cut my weights circuit so I could get away from her.

I know that this is my own idiocy. I should have been up front and just said I am going to do more in the gym, I'll see you tomorrow. I guess the moral of this story is that I should grow a spine.

Maybe you could just be upfront with her and say that you enjoy her company but like to focus without chatting while you work out? Do it at a time when you're not immediately confronted with the situation though so you don't seem like you're just blowing her off. You could give a semi-legit excuse like you want to keep your heartrate into a zone where talking is precluded. Soften the blow by arranging to hang out with her another time or perhaps right when you finish working out. Like, you could plan to work out separately and both finish at 7:00 PM and then hang out in the smoothie bar or whatever to chat for 15 mins.

Quite frankly, I don't blame you. I could chat with anyone when I am lifting weights. I have to concentrate on what I am doing, on my form, breathing, etc. This is not the time for social conversation. Perhaps you may have to start hitting the gym at different times than your friend. Or tell her that you don't like to chat when you exercise, but that you would be more than happy to have coffee [or protein shake] with her afterwards (for example).

Thanks for the input ERHR and Tomato (love your username!). See, I feel guilty to a degree, even if it is to my own detriment. She sort of looks to me for motivation and that's a lot of pressure on me.

She's spouting off tons of, oh you're not supposed to lift weights slowly. Oh you're not supposed to do this, or that or blah blah blah and I think my bristling at her blabber is due not only to my nature as a person (solitary) but also because I don't want to shoulder the responsiblity of being her inspiration (though it's sort of flattering.)

Also she is significantly overweight and is constantly throwing out barbs like, well, you don't need to lose as much weight as I do as if my quest is somehow less worthy than hers?

I will most likely not say anything to her and sort of not talk while she keeps talking and hope that she gets the hint. Thanks again for the input ladies.

I think just saying "hey I love working out together but I don't want to talk much, I hope you don't mind..."

And if she does mind then you'll have to cut her off. I did the same years ago- my workout buddies wanted to talk rather than work out. But when my sister and I work out we just do our thing side by side- now and then we might make a comment but other than that we don't say much cuz we are there to WORK.

As for not lifting slowly I'd tell her you are working on form and controlled movements and that's why you do them slowly.

I am so sorry! I love my ALONE time at the gym. I had a lady try to start working out with me and didn't like it one bit. I was so realived when she quit. I a not a social work outer either. Not sure how to help you solve the problem- just wanted you to know it is okay to want to work out alone. Could you put your IPOD on and tell her you just want to listen to your tunes?