Depressed and not eating
 

I'm bipolar. Typically I'm an emotional eater. The last 2 days I have plummeted in depression and I don't feel like eating. Yesterday I ate 2 meal bars because I wanted soemthing in my body even if I didn't want to eat. Finally I ate a Subway sandwhich (that took a while to eat). Today, it is lunch and I've eaten an orange. I open a can of tuna and have seseme seeds. I've eaten 2 bits of tuna. I believe that we shouldn't starve ourselves. I guess it is good that I'm not emotional eating though.

This week my grandfather died (I wasn't close to him) and the day before the funeral my mom tried to kill herself (they put her in jail). She also wanted to kill one of my sisters and burn down my grandma's house. My mom is Schizo and BP. We can't get her put in a hospital. We've tried several times. She has to go voluntarily. Then that same sister wants to kill her 5 mo fetus. She is undiagnosed and in denial but very much schizo and bp. We have tried to call CPS on her many times for her other 3 children. They do NOTHING. It's pitiful. Then another sister decided to go back to her abusive boyfriend and doesn't think it is a bad thing. I have one sister that isn't caught up in all of this. It's always up to us two to figure things out. We can't do anything and it is frustrating. Now that I have BP (2 years ago), it really brings my mood down.

Wow, you really have a lot going on in your life. Maybe you could contact your local community mental health agency for assitance. Supportive counseling and theapy services may be beneficial to you. Psychotropic medication may be of help to you and other members of your family that are suffering from mental illness. Depending on what state you're in a psychiatrist could petition probate court to invoke assisted outpatient treatment if an individual is found to be a harm to themselves or others (its called Kevin's Law). I hope things get better for you and your family.

Sorry to hear about everything that is going on in your life. It must be tough. I can see why you wouldn't feel like eating. I would suggest that you pick lite foods to eat and just graze. You are right in that it isn't good for your body to go without food. Maybe try carrots, celery, grapes --- just things that you can nibble on.

A :hug: can never hurt so I am sending you one of those.

Venting
 

Yeah, mostly I wanted to vent. I ate an orange, tuna/crackers, sunflower seeds, and my husband will make me porkchops and brocolli tnite. Not terrific, but not bad. It took me over an hour to eat the tuna/10 crackers, but I ate.

It takes so much to be me. It takes so much to hold the guilt of changing. To have to worry about or take care of the rest of the family isn't good for me. I should be blessed that I'm 100x more sane than they are, but just as soon as I am thankful, I am also resentful that they cant take care of themselves. Having BP, I should know it isn't them, but uughh.

I can't afford not to go to work. I'm contract so I don't get paid if I don't go. I really don't want to go tomorrow. I think also what kills me right now is I just moved here and while I like doing that, I don't have a true support system yet. That might make a difference.

I believe in babysteps. I think the first thing you can do to make yourself feel better is to get rid of the sad emoticon. Love You, Tia

Thank you so much! That actually made me feel good. Compared to yesterday, I am doing much better. I know I'm not doing anything except sitting on this computer all day, but making posts all day is making me think about food and eat something. For nutrient sake, I decided to drink my last 2 things (v8 and chocolate milk). I need to have energy for tmw. I go back to work.

Well DefinitelySmart...

I can not offer much advice for you, but I just wanted to let you know you are not alone. I was diagnosed with Biapolar two years ago also. I can't imagine havin to deal with all those family issues on top of my diagnosis. You didn't mention if you are in thereapy or not. I know that therapy can be very stress relieving.

I am an emotional eater too...and since I was hospitalized I have gained 71 pounds in one and a half yeras. EEEEKKKKKKS. SO, your not alone in that area either. You mentioned in a another post that you were reading the bipolar survival guide. One of my favorite bipolar recources.

Again, just wanted to let you know that you are not alone...I know sometimes I feel very alone is all of this. I will be your support if you need one. Please PM me if you need to.
Namaste

Yeah, it IS annoying to be (mostly) successfully dealing with one's own mental illness, and then have family members who can't deal with theirs. We don't want to blame them... but we can't help being angry. Maybe you could use your feelings as motivation to take care of yourself, so that in the future you don't have their problems.

Sorry to hear about all your troubles. :hug:

Kick BP's butt -- don't let it kick yours!