I gained so much weight in the past month. I apologize for not being around very much. I developed tendonitis (or so my dr thinks), and so my right hand has been killing me. I type all day at work so it is having trouble fighting the inflammation. Coming home and spending time on my laptop is sometimes not an option.

Anyways, I have been eating badly again, sodas, ice cream, pizza...the works! I'm 324 again, so now I have to change my thinking, kick myself in the butt, SOMETHING!!!

I actually went walking with my sister three times last week, but that's not the miracle cure, and I know that. I need consistency...but most of all, I need the strength to do this by myself. I need to do this for me and stop needing someone to hold my hand. The frustrating part is that I KNOW what my problem is, I know what I need to do, but I am so rebellious against even myself. I am so angry at myself right now.

Have any of you encountered this..It's very frustrating. I am an obssessive compulsive person, and when I really put my mind to do something, I do it. Why can't I do this with my weight?

I think you might benefit from this book I've heard about (the details are vague), I think it's called "It's not what you're eating, it's what's eating you"

You might wish to get a referral from your doc. to a nutritionist, or someone who will hold you accountable for your actions on a weekly or twice weekly basis. (trainer?) there are people who specialize with this but you might have to pay out of pocket or go through a reputable gym. (some insurance plans will actually pay your health club membership)

consider this "hitting the bottom", now you are on your way up.

Hey - I just posted a long reply to you and then something went crazy with my computer and now my post isn't here!

Anyway, I wanted to say that it is very hard to be motivated when you are in pain or don't feel well. You should be proud that you have been walking some - it shows there's still some motivation somewhere!

I also said that I read an article, this morning, that talks about olive oil working like an anti-inflammatory in your body, and that it is way better for you than using regular anti-inflammatories, like ibuprofen. I use flax oil when I am not feeling well and it works great!

Best wishes to you!

Lesley

Yes, I went through the same thing. After gaining weight due to meds, I felt hopeless about losing it. Back in college, I used to be able to develop a plan and stick to it. But when I was in my bad headspace, I couldn't start losing weight, no matter what.

What helped me was changing small habits, and then staying with the new habits, rather than going back to the old ways once I had dropped a few pounds. To be honest, changing my exercise, like a few walks a week, did not help me lose weight. The only thing that did help was changing my food intake. I started limiting my soda consumption, from two or three cans a day to one; eating out at restaurants less, from twenty times a week to ten; eating fewer junk food snackes, from six cookies to four. As you can see, my changes weren't even close to what most people consider "ideal" diets. Four cookies? Restaurants every day of the week? Soda every day? Doesn't sound like those changes would do much good. But for me it wasn't about going from slob to perfect, it was relative changes that worked. I can keep up the habit of one soda per day far easier that I could one soda per week, or a "no soda" rule. See what I'm saying?

I then lost 20 lbs. over two years. Not a big, fast loss, but a loss instead of a gain. Then forty-some days ago, I started counting calories and doing the things most people think of as a normal diet. Now the weight is coming off a lot more quickly, but two years ago I just wasn't ready. I made changes that I new were realistic. After making small changes over a long time, I am at last able to maintain willpower and make more drastic changes.

So my advice to you is to pick a few small changes, changes that are relatively good as opposed to perfect, and stay with those changes for a long time. After having some success with continuing new habits, you eventually will be able to make the big changes. Hopefully it won't take you two years like it did for me. But please accept that sometimes we can't make a bunch of big changes all at once, and you might be more successful if you start small.

Hugs!

Thanks for all of your input. I ordered that book on ebay...I didn't want to spend money on it, but I found it for 68 cents :P Shipping was a couple bucks, so really I didn't spend much. I hope I get more than what I paid for out of it though. :P

I agree with the small changes idea. I have tried that, and it usually helps and makes me feel better. But during the past few weeks, I had found it difficult to stick with those small changes I had made. But I have learned that you can't give up.. I've haven't gotten back to my largest size, and I'm not going to let myself either. I was so proud of myself when I had gotten to 295, and now I'm almost back up to 330. It's strange how easy it is to put on weight, but so hard to take it off.

Anyways, thanks again for your input...This forum helps to keep me focused!