3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community - May Ups and Downs Depression Support Thread

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May Ups and Downs Depression Support Thread

Welcome :welcome: to our support thread, where you are free to talk, vent, celebrate, share, anything in your life :)

I am cutting and pasting Cinnamonheart's last 3 posts, that were in the April thread, and putting them here.

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Cinnamonhearts (Post 5313469)

Hi Lisa,

For some reason I always pictured Elvira as a little terrier. Is she a lab?

I'm glad that you got outside, even for a short time. I absolutely love the sun. I find even just a short amount of time in the sun, for me, goes a long way in terms of my emotional well-being.

I understand about the gym and comfort levels. I was blessed to make friends with one of the trainers when I first started...we were close friends for a couple of years after. Anyway she made me feel super comfortable with the equipment and gave me a ton of knowledge regarding working out. So I feel grateful that I feel confident in that respect going to the gym...but I've been avoiding it. Partially due to social anxiety. Partially because truthfully I felt self conscious while trapped in cycles of bulimia.

That said, I'm a huge believer in, if you want to increase your exercise/movement, to do whatever exercise you like to do, in a place that make you comfortable. Right now I'm more comfortable going for walks with my husband. I just haven't had the courage or brainspace to go to the gym. I guess I'm just rambling a bit.

I liked your comment about liking the fact that you can still learn new things about yourself after being in therapy for a while. I hadn't thought of things that way, but I like it. I tend to keep on thinking of myself as a broken person in need of repair, but I like your comment because its a reminder that I'm not broken, just constantly learning new things about myself.

I hope you and your animals are enjoying your new home :) It sounds lovely and peaceful.

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Cinnamonhearts (Post 5313533)

Holly - Congrats on getting back on track after a small tumble :) I also like how you focused on things you can change, like yard work, to shift your focus from negative thoughts. I might try this out for myself :)

Kathleen - Thank you for all your previous kind comments. I apologize that I did not respond back for a week or so...

I'm happy to hear that your kids are doing well! What sort of alternative fun activity did your daughter pick out?

I feel that we are thinking similarly about eating. I've been focusing on being mindful while eating and stopping when full. It's not always easy but I am finding with practice I'm learning more and more about myself and food.I might write more later on this.

I really like the elliptical too, although it's been a while. Congrats on your exercise!

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Cinnamonhearts (Post 5313608)

I thought I would elaborate more on how I've been doing lately.

I finally finished the book Brain Over Binge; I had bought it a few years ago (I think) and never finished it. Anyway it's been a pretty amazing read. The premise is that you need to dismiss the urge to binge in order to heal, rather than fix or discover your "issues".

I feel that all of a sudden I understood the premise and I stopped bingeing. It's been 2.5 weeks and I haven't been white knuckling it either. It's been a blessing; a very peaceful new development. I realized that I needed to stop tracking my eating so that I could focus on the urge to binge, which for me was the actual issue. That in of itself was a huge blessing too.

Right now I consider myself fully healed of bulimia and I've been trying to adjust to eating without tracking, without shame. I was afraid I would just eat and eat and eat if I didn't track...but I find that isn't happening at all. It's like I'm uncovering all these rules I have had about food and eating and I'm just...shocked. I thought I was just committed and disciplined to eating heathily. But how can I be healthy while I'm mentally beating myself up and bingeing? Trying to eat more naturally or intuitively is quite interesting...like I said, I'm uncovering all these rules about eating that I'm realizing have been huge weights on my shoulders. And it's so interesting to see that without tracking I'm following my hunger cues and to a certain degree, what I desire to eat. And I'm not feeling deprived nor am I going crazy with eating. Nor am I eating perfectly.

I feel that I have been healed from binge eating, although obviously I'm still learning about myself and overeating and dealing with different problems in my life. There's some painful stuff going on.

I still haven't returned to the gym...It's been so tied to negative feelings about myself and self punishment that I'm a little afraid that if I return, then I'll start having urges to binge or punish myself. I really want to return to the gym and focus on doing my favourite exercises and being ok with leaving the rest behind. I've been trying to get outdoors walking on the weekends but either my husband hasn't felt well and I didn't want to go by myself, or the weather has been terrible. So for now I'm hoping to return, but focusing on overcoming bingeing and overeating first.

Cinnamonhearts - wow congrats on such a breakthrough development! you have really, really concentrated and put thought into your issues. that is amazing! :cheer2:

Hello to Lisa, Kathleen, Monica, JesikaBeth, Coop, Britt! and any of the newbies that we don't quite know yet :) come and say Hi again!

Sooo...when I saw my new doctor a month ago, for my pre-surgery physical, he asked if I thought I wanted to wean myself off my antidepressant. I said I would give it a try. And I have. I haven't had a dose now in weeks. I think I feel fine about it.

Been doing incredibly great with my exercising almost daily (only missed 4 days out of 31 last month!) not incredibly great with eating but better!! progress, not perfection, as Kathleen reminds us! :cheer2:

We have had rain for a couple days now :tantrum: I was able to do some lawn work on Sunday, I was weedwhacking the thickest grass in preparation of mowing, and it started hailing :rolleyes: I continued :devil: and it did let up, but since that day no more yard work. Frustrating!

You will think I am nuts but tomorrow afternoon I will work for the RB for 4 hours, I like the $ and I can deal with seeing him only briefly :devil: then tomorrow evening we have our monthly motorcyclist meeting, and we are selecting the recipient of our $3000 scholarship awards.

I was trying to make our thread title Bold and now it looks dumb with the tags :devil:

ETA: Fixed by magic. cheers..BillBlueEyes

Hi Holly,

thanks for making the new thread. I've been really lazy about posting lately. I am starting to feel a little better, not 100% but i have made some improvement. How's your time off going? What have you been doing for fun? I hope you got your bike out.

cinammon, you have made wonderful strides. You've put in the work and are getting great insights into yourself and how you tick. Yes, Elvira is a 70 lb black lab. She's a beautiful doggy. I'm very proud of her.

I am still doing small things around the house. I am still taking care of my hygiene. I am due for a hair cut, a trim actually. I am washing clothes and always wearing clean clothes. It's so much easier to take care of myself in this house.

I just watched Twister. It's one of my favorite movies. I am still so incredibly sad that Bill Paxton passed away a couple months ago. I enjoyed many of his movies so much and always thought he was sooooo handsome.

The wind is so bad here today. The lake is choppier than it has been, since i moved in.

I went to the Dr yesterday and got cortisone shots in both knees. I go back in 3 months for more.

I've been getting headaches daily. I have one now.

I have been posting pictures on instagram. my name is lisa.4141 if you want to add me.

I hope you all are well. Much love to you all.

Lisa - luv your pic of Elvira!!!! adorable shiny black girl :)

hope the shots help your knees!! does it hurt when you're getting them :eek:

yay to you for keeping up on stuff you need, in your own house :)

Oh gosh I know, how sad it was (still is) about Bill Paxton! so young!

I have only been out on my bike 2 times, then yesterday I took it to our local Vocational/Tech center, they have a PowerSports-specific garage, the kids love the course, the instructor is a certified Harley Davidson mechanic (I don't have a Harley but they work on everything) and the labor is like $8 an hour!!!! instead of $60 an hour!! I need a new speedometer/odometer sensor or cable or sumpin :devil: I did wear my new-to-me Tourmaster textile jacket ( a lady sold it to me for $5! they are $179 new!) and it is freakin awesome, so warm and waterproof and windproof and technical :carrot: my old Cupcake leather jacket is gonna get jealous!

I took care of an eyesore (another one :rolleyes: ) on our lawn, a DirecTV satellite dish that was mounted on a pole. Well I took care of it, in the way that I asked my husband to take it down :devil: but I am taking it in my car to the Transfer Station tomorrow, along with a box of clothes I am admitting I am too big for.

So yes I am enjoying my time off but also trying to make it productive.

Quote:

Originally Posted by VermontMom (Post 5313639)

Thank you for copying my comments into this thread and for your sweet comments as well :)

Wow it sounds like you have a lot of exciting stuff going on! Congrats on the exercise - what types do you like to do?

I always laugh when you talk about the RB lol....I mean the name, not the frustrating situations he causes. When does your summer job start up?

Quote:

Originally Posted by lisaloveshearts (Post 5313692)

I haven't watched Twister but I do like Bill Paxton. His death was such a shock :( He had such a nice smile and yes was very handsome!

Good for you for taking care of your clothes etc. I fully understand how difficult that can be sometimes. I know my mom deals with that.

Today is a down day.My son who is 23 may be starting a schooling on Monday.....the problem is he has no job or money and would need to pay $70.00 per week. I'm anxious over finances because of this. We would have to help him out until he seeks employment and then he complained that he wouldn't have money for himself. I took 2 naps today. I don't really feel needed much anymore. I have transportation sometimes. My husband prefers I don't work outside the home. My boys are getting older and need me much less. There must be more to life than scrubbing toilets, dishes and making supper before my husband goes to work. I do enjoy bird feeding. I asked my husband to fix my treadmill but he didn't. My dog chewed the cord.

Hi ladies,

Welcome petitemommy!! Welcome to the thread. We are so glad to have you here with us. :)

I just got done eating an early supper. I am fat and sassy now. I think I ate too much.

Pioneer Woman is on now, my favorite cooking show. I dvr her so I don't miss any episodes.

Jennifer texted me last night to tell me that Feelix snuck into the dryer last night and took a small tumble. Yep, he sure did. He's not hurt but freaked out for a short time. He's ok now. I texted back that I would bet he would never do that again. Dumb kitty.

This is Jennifer's Fee.

http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b1...psahbnomoc.jpg

I went out last night. The first night in over a year. It was ladies night at the gay bar, they served food. Serve me food and i'm there. I'm not really going out to meet someone, if it hapens great but I'm really just going to make new friends. I bet I met 10 people last night. I got a text from a really nice guy I met, his name is Cody. He texted me today that it was nice meeting me. He is gay so he's not hitting on me. He's just a really nice guy.

That's about it for now. I hope you all are doing good. :)

Hi guys! I thought I should pop by with the new month and say hi! :wave:

I only realised the other day how long I must have gone without stopping by - sorry! I'll have a lot of catching up to do!

There's nothing much to report. We've been decorating and doing a gluten free cookery course, and just generally keeping busy. I like being busy.

Having a few issues with OH's Gran at the moment - she's still having memory slip ups. Nothing on its own is an issue, but add them up, and we're worried. The latest is forgetting to pay her phone bill. We can see she's trying to cover for her memory mistakes, so while we're looking at the disconnection notice, she's telling us she's settled her bills up to June :dz: but she lives 100 miles away, and I don't know how we'll cope if it's a serious memory problem.

Anyway, I'm going to try to catch up with you all over the next few days - big task I think!

Cinnamonhearts - I am hooked now on Leslie Sansone's Walk away the Pounds routines, I've been doing her 5k (3 mile, 45 min.) routine at least twice a week for a month now. Other online exercisers I like - Paula Bee and Shelly Dose. I can finally use some weights ( I just use one, 3.3, 5, 7, 9 lb dumbbells) it's been long enough since my surgeries that its OK now.

The summer job officially opens on Wed. May 17th, but I will have my first day there next week, on the 10th. I will work a few days, have off for Mother's Day, and then full days for the next week. I also have committed to a few more days for the RB :devil: Yes, he has earned that title :devil: but hopefully mostly I laugh about it.

Once the summer job starts I hope I don't put anyone here in a snacky mood by describing the pastries and cakes I will be making :)

Lisa so glad you went out and had a good time!! and met lots of people, and made at least one friend :) Isn't it hard to make new friends once you're not a kid! and what a cutie kitty Feelix is! so glad he wasn't hurt in the dryer!! :eek:

Coop HI and good to hear from you! oh gosh that is worrying about your OH's Gram :( that she lives so far away that you can't keep an eye on her. Any other family members near her??

Keeping busy is good, I agree!!

cool about the gluten-free cooking course also!

:welcome: to petitemommy! like Lisa said we are so happy to have you here :) I'm sorry you are having a down day though. Worrying about finances is horrible I know! and you are worried about your son..well it is a good thing for him to make the decision about schooling, isn't it?

and yes, there should be more to life than housework! you like feeding and watching birds? so you must like nature, do you like to plant things and grow things?

we hope you can find some interests to keep you happy!!!

and HI to everyone else :)

Chicks we had sun today!! :sunny: :sunny: I had to put it in bold and big, because it was such a big deal! :lol: and I took full advantage of it, I transplanted seedlings into bigger pots, and i counted over 70 :eek: it is too clumsy to work with gardening gloves, so I just used my bare hands, and my fingers and nails were so packed with dirt :devil: and then after the re-potting, I bravely tried the lawn mower, and it started after only 4 pulls! so I mowed the lawn and it looks so nice. The smell of the fresh cut grass is so lovely too :) The seedlings are - flowers (petunias, pansies, sunflowers) and veggies; squash, pumpkins, and gourds.

I am working 8 hours for the RB tomorrow, 'cause they are desperate :devil: and because I want the money!! I got the surgeon's bill for the first eye :eek: I put it on a credit card but I will make big payments to get it down.

So I always have to thank you all that I can use this space to 'talk' to you all, I don't have any close friends that I can talk to, so this is vital for me :)