I just want to cut. I was a cutter for years but I haven't done it in over a year. My mind's so messed up and I just wish it would STOP. I have no friends, I'm a burden to my family, my bipolar disorder is raging out of control...It's insane and I just don't know what to do. Help. Please.

Have you thought about seeking professional help? Seriously. I would recommend getting your depression in check and seek help. There is a great website called Take this Life (ttl dot com) and there might be some people there that can help support as well. I do not think they will replace a doctor, however, they might help because they can relate

I think Ryeb's suggestion is good. You shouldn't cut. It is addictive and you haven't done it for a year.
Go for a walk--take a hot bath, deal with your stress and emotions in a more beneficial way.
You can find happiness in life, it will just be a process. Make a list of goals, or just write a basic schedule and stick to it.
The world is full of good possibilities that are hard to see when you are having a "dark night of the soul."
You could, in addition to seeking help, find some good self-help books and read them.
I used to cut myself and no longer do that. I know a lot of people who have healed and have happy lives.
Plus, your family loves you and want you to heal and lead a happy, satisfied, whole life.

Elizabeth your quote from Lady Gaga(I think) is so right. Believe it. If you can just get away like take a walk just to let your mind rest for awhile.

I have family members who also have Bipolar, it is not something to mess with. Medication is very important. I am not sure where you live but I would suggest that you check your self into a hospital. They can help you get back on track.

There is one thing about families - THEY ALWAYS LOVE YOU!!!! It doesn't matter what is going on they always do. I am sure they want what is best for you and it may hurt them to see you hurting.

Please seek professional help.

Best of luck,

Sorry you're feeling so bad right now, Elizabeth. It sounds like you feel overwhelmed.

You said your Bipolar Disorder is out of control. Are there things you can do to take control of it? Are you prescribed meds, and are you taking them as prescribed? Have you made, or can you make, an appointment with a psychiatrist for an evaluation or medication adjustment? Are you engaged in, or have you researched, any complementary therapies (group therapy, CBT, etc.)? Have you read the self-help literature that's out there for people who have Bipolar Disorder? Making a plan for getting the Bipolar Disorder back under control might be one way to get your feet back on solid ground. Even if it's not perfect or 100% successful, you'll have something to work from, and towards.

Why do you think you're a burden to your family? Have they said that? If they have, is that true or how things must always be?

Even if you don't have any friends IRL right now, that doesn't mean you'll never have any. And you've got friends on here (hi!).

You've obviously got a strong will (weight loss and no cutting for several years!); you can get through this. Hang in there.

Thanks guys. I think I need to go see my psychiatrist again. I go to see a new counselor next thursday and my doctor said she'll recommend a group therapy for me.

That's great!

Honey I have BPD 1 and i know just what you mean with it being out of control, you may need your meds changed. dont cut even though it will help you short term its not gonna help you long term.
My self hard is pills and overdosing i havent done it for 3 months and i am glad i am not, do the same honey.
GO AND SEE SOMEONE PROFESSIONAL, Bipolar out of control is BAD believe me I have been there many times and pro help is the only way through it.
Remember you are ILL, you do not choose to be like this.
If you had no arms and legs people could see you need help, with mental illness people cant see it you NEED to ask for help darling.

Take care honey and try not to do anything stupid like cutting anything else that will harm you. xxx

I'm so sorry, honey. I hope you have the strength to not cut. Please know you're not alone - I am so depressed lately, too. I wish there was something I could do to help the bad feelings stop - for all of us.