What is wrong with me?
I want to go out in the morning with my son and walk but I just can't bring myself to do, I'm just convinced that someone will kidnap us or we'll get hit by a car. Do I sound crazy?
When my hubby leaves for work at 3 am I often can't go back to sleep because any little noise in the house convinces me that someone has broken in and they want to hurt my son and I. It makes me want to cry.
And the biggest one of all is that I can't drive, when I get into a car to try and learn I start having these panic attacks and I'm so scared I can't do it, I tell my hubby I just refuse to drive becasue I dont want to get into a car accisent that could kill me and my son. This is ruining my life.
Now my marriage and family is suffering from my problem!
My hubby works 12 to 14 hrs a day and since I don't drive he has to spend any extra time he has to do the grocery shopping, take son to appointments. My poor baby rarely gets out of the house becasue I'm too scared to walk anywhere with him or take him to the park, in my mind I'm just protecting him.We can't live like this anymore. I don't what to do.

you really need to go and see your doctor and tell him/her what you are saying here....

trust me...it won't go away by itself...go and see someone and get help with this problem so that it doesn't take over your life any more than it already has.....

Please go see a therapist.

You're not the only one. I'm going to start seeing a therapist next week because of a similar problem. I'm convinced that something bad is going to happen to the house and we won't be able to afford to fix it. I've canceled trips to visit my family because I'm convinced when we come home a pipe will have burst or a sinkhole will have opened up under the house and it will have partially collapsed. I'm aware that I'm being totally irrational but I still obsess over it. Every time it rains I have a panic attack and have to check every inch of our house to see if the roof leaked or water came in somewhere. I have to check the sewer drain in our basement constantly to make sure it hasn't backed up; I'm positive that it's collapsed and will back up at any minute (even though I can do four loads of laundry, run the dishwasher, and give both kids showers within a couple hours and the drain never backs up).

So, I don't have any answers, but I'm hoping a therapist will. And I bet a therapist can help you as well. There's no need to live like this.

tanya

hi shyshy - no you are not the only one and you are not crazy. there are a lot of people that feel what you are feeling.

I want to strongly suggest to you (bec some docs may not) that there may very well be a physical reason for what you are feeling.

Please get yourself to a doc and demand that they do complete and thorough blood work to check every possible physical thing that could possibly be causing you to feel this way, but in particular, have them run these thyroid tests:

FREE T3
FREE T4
TSH
THYROGLOBULIN ANTIBODIES
and THYROID PEROXIDASE ANTIBODIES

If you Free T3 result is not in the upper 1/3 of the range, if may very well be that your Free T3 is too low and causing your anxiety.

You might want to check out the info at:
http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com...mental-health/

Please let me know if I can help in anyway.
take care,
Cathy

Thank you all so much for just being here for me to talk to, it really does help.

One morething though, I dont have any medical insurance right now, I can't get in on hubby's plan till December, are there any options for me?
I know I need to see a doc.

ShyShy - I'm sorry you don't have health insurance. I certainly know how that goes. We only have major hospitalization so nothing to cover regular doctor costs and prescriptions and blood work and such.

If you would like to at least check out your thyroid and make sure it is not the problem, you can order the tests yourself thru www.healthcheckusa.com by ordering the:
1. Comprehensive Thyroid Panel II $85.00
2. Anti-Thyroid Antibodies $70.00

I realize that is still $155.00 but it will be more than worth it if you actually have a thyroid problem and it is found. If you do have a thyroid problem and it is treated with Armour Thyroid, it is less than $20 a month.

take care,
Cathy

Is there a medical school near you? You might be able to get lower-cost mental health care there, or even get in on a clinical trial. I think most therapists have sliding scale fee structures for people who don't have insurance.

Are you a stay at home mom? I got a book from the library on anxiety, trying to figure out what was wrong with me, and it said that stay at home moms (like me) and retirees were most likely to suffer from crippling anxiety, because we don't have anything to distract us from our fears. We can sit and obsess about our fears. I don't know how helpful that is (at least for me, going back to work is not an option), but it makes sense. When I worked I never felt this fearful.

I get insomnia too, I wake up in the middle of the night and my mind is racing and I can't calm down. I've resorted to taking sleeping pills which has its own set of problems, but when I sleep better my daytime anxiety seems better.

tanya

I can relate. Except I am constantly obsessing over dying. I can't sleep at night for thinking I won't wakeup. I have caused myself panic attacks and unneccesary trips to the ER over it infact.
I have anxiety alot.
It's really hard to function when obsessing over things. I am working on going back to the doctor and get back on SOMETHING to take the edge off so I can feel normal, and not constantly worry.

Your county's health department would be a good resource. They very well may have help available on a sliding scale. Otherwise look in the front of your Yellow pages. there are hot lines etc listed there and they may be able to refer you to a low or no cost clinic.

Good luck and you don't have to be scared. There is help out there.

Tanya, I am a stay at home mom and since I dont drive I'm always in the house kind od unexposed to the real world, so maybe this is causing a problem
I do work but it's my own business and I do it from home and will do it forever so I know I won't be getting out and working.

Sock monkey, I feel ya. I have so many panic attacks over rediculous things its not even funny, but for anyone who knows what a panic attack feels like, our thoughts dont seem rediculouse at the time at all.

I guess I will have to call the health department and see if they can help, I can't let this get any worse.

Where I live we have a state sponsored mental health clinic. They work on a sliding fee scale and many of the major drug companies will subsidize their products through your doctor/clinician. In Massachusetts it is called Health and Education Services. Go to your states website and look under the Dept of Health section. They should have resources for you.

Good luck - I battle depression and anxiety also and had - what I consider - a breakdown this past winter. It is consuming and trying to take care of children while this is all going on is terribly difficult. Give yourself credit for doing that and keep communicating with your husband so he knows whats going on. Hugs