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Old 08-19-2008, 01:23 PM   #91  
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Hey guys!!

Troo - How was babysitting?? Are you still hoping for children in the future? A friend of mine and her DH had problems and used AI for each of their 6 children. Then, at 41, WHAMMO . . . she got pregnant naturally. It was a surprise to say the least.

Enygirl - Remember how tired you get when you're first pregnant?? Get rested now and let things calm down. Pregnancy will happen when you're ready. When things are crazy around you, just focus on the moment. Worrying about the past or the future only causes anxiety. Breathe . . . just breathe and get centered. It helps, I promise!!

Shay - You've been awfully quiet lately. Whazzup??

Blue, Crissy, mrsaugie - I started over yesterday, too. And you know what? It really felt GREAT to be on plan. I mean, it was hard. I'd used all my points and wanted wine or ice cream, but I drank iced tea instead and it felt GREAT to go to bed knowing I'd stuck to my plan.

I think a lot of the depression that comes from slipping up and gaining some weight just snowballs. I feel badly about my behavior so I behave badly. In the end though . . . what I put in my mouth is one of the ONLY things I CAN CONTROL.

Every one of us know we feel better when we eat properly and get some activity. WHY IS IT when we fall off we have such a hard time getting going again?? (Just a rhetorical question, I guess.)

BIG HUG! We all deserve to be healthy, happy, and beautiful!
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Old 08-19-2008, 01:25 PM   #92  
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Look what just landed in my in-box!!

http://www.oprah.com/article/omagazi...k_improvements
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Old 08-20-2008, 10:16 AM   #93  
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OK - i'm doing a little better. I'm just SO overwhelmed right now! My eating was completely off for 3 days, but yesterday was MUCH better. I still haven't worked out. I just feel SO tired and overwhelmed. I'm going to work on that though. I need to get through level 2 & 3 of 30DS! And I've heard they're killers! I'm planning on tonight starting level 2. I'm retaining a lot of water right now... and I know the amount of salt I've eaten in the last 3 days hasn't helped.

I didn't let myself stray for long. I really need to get control of a lot of aspects of my life right now - but I'm climbing back on the wagon - and still UNDER #190! I Swore to myself NEVER AGAIN!!!
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Old 08-20-2008, 07:59 PM   #94  
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Crissy--Don't dwell on it. That makes it easier. I'm telling you it works!

gg-I'm here. I'm currently obsessed with getting my hair healthy and I want it longer. I've been researching and I've found a forum and I've been posting on it.

I've been listening to Inside Out Weight Loss podcast each morning as I soak in the tub. I love taking baths! Anyways you can goggle it and the website will be the first thing listed. It has been so helpful. I can't even start to tell you everything but there are two things I wanted to mention here.

1. Success journal--Most people use journals to express how they feel which can be quite depressing sometimes but she suggests you right before going to bed focus on your successes and write them in this journal.

2. Have you ever wanted something so bad that it became your entire focus?It dominates your life but for some reason you strive and strive for it yet you never get there? Sound familiar??? Let it go! Stop obsessing over it and you might just achieve your goal.

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Old 08-21-2008, 11:12 AM   #95  
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Shay - I read an article just last night on hair masks to help make your hair healthier. I'm going to try the Chemistry Repair Heat-Activated Hair & Scalp Masque from Walgreens. ($10). The Garnier Fructis Strength & Repair Melting Masque looked good, too and is only $4. There were a bunch of others that were more expensive, like $30 - $52. I don't even know if I could find the brands they mentioned.

It is Thursday morning and I have consumed all of my Flex points!! All of them! Every single one gone in only 3 days!! I haven't worked out all week and my goal is to work out 4 times so I'm going to have to get my fanny moving and keep it moving for the rest of the week.

Today is registration at the high school for my oldest son. UGH. I hate registration. Tomorrow is my youngest son. Lovely, two days in a row at the high school!!
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Old 08-21-2008, 06:40 PM   #96  
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gg--Thanks for that information because I definitely plan to deep condition my hair.

Here is another one from Inside Weight Loss. A delimiting belief is something that keeps you in a box. It keeps you from trying things and most times this belief does not have a lot of evidence. What is a delimiting belief about weight loss? That it is hard. Why is it hard? Could it possibly be easy? How? What makes weight loss hard is if you have inner conflict. Something is going on within that makes you want to hold onto that weight. Is it serving a purpose for you? What is overeating doing for you? If you have inner alignment then weight loss is easy.

I really identified with this because bingeing does serve a purpose for me. I without a doubt have a lot of inner conflict. So I am currently working on inner alignment.

More of what she talked about today--success sabotage!!!!! I am there! I do it all of the time!! When she said that I said out loud "THAT"S ME!!" She must have read my 8/14 journal entry....

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Old 08-21-2008, 07:55 PM   #97  
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Self sabotgae huh - well that's me to a T! At one point in this journey I was at #180.6... remember GG? And now I've been bouncing betwee #185 and #189 for over a MONTH! There's NO reason that I should keep this weight on. I know what I need to do! Exercising 30 minutes isn't HARD... so Why am I not doing what I need to? BECAUSE I'M SCARED! I've never been below #170ish in my adult life.. heck since I was 15!!! So it SCARES THE HE** OUT OF ME! I know I want to be healthy... i want to get my cholesterol down (203) and I DO NOT want to die of a heart disease at 35!!!

What if Joe doesn't like the way I look skinny? (he likes "bigger" girls)
What if I don't like the way I look??
How much attention will be brought to me if I lose the weight? (THIS IS A BIG ONE!)
Does my sisters' and mothers ridicule and snide comments about me losing weight (because they're jealous and overweight and not doing anything to fix it) really bother me that much that I won't work for what I so desperately want?

These are things CONSTANTLY on my mind!!! (crazy huh? )

One really nice NSV today - I went to dinner w/ my mom, step-dad, sister, DD, neice & step-brother and my neice (who is to bluntly honest for her own good) said, "Have you been working out because you look skinnier". It made me feel good to get a compliment from an 8 year old!!!

I WILL work out tonight as soon as DD goes to bed! I Will not let myself give into the laziness ANYMORE!!! MY TIME IS NOW!!!!
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Old 08-22-2008, 10:07 AM   #98  
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Hi Ladies!

I, too, can relate to the self-sabotaging. (Lots of inner conflict here!) I wish my head would just shut up somtimes (ok, most of the time)! But I learned something about myself the other day and about the way I've been approaching weight-loss. It's really simple, like "why couldn't I see this before" ... Here's been my problem ... the difference between losing weight and not losing weight is doing something about it and not doing something about it.

I was explaining elsewhere that I'm a perfectionist and this is how I've related to weight loss too. Got to have all my ducks in a row. And if something goes wrong it's instantly calculated as "failure" in my head. (And there's been lots of "failures" added up over the 20-25+ years I've been trying to lose weight!) So, for me falling off the wagon and binging on "bad" foods was my way of making up for it. Kind of like "well if I was going to be right back where I started at I could have been eating this stuff all along" or "well, as long as I'm not on a diet at the moment, I might as well enjoy myeself." It's always been "all or nothing" with me and I hate that!

One of the kind 3FC ladies in the Faith Based Support Groups forum said something that woke me up. She said: "This isn't about doing without." Wow! A few simple little words have totally changed my perspective on this journey. It made me realize that my "all or nothing" mentality was why I kept yo-yoing. There was an imaginary line in my head ... either you're being good and you're on plan or you're being bad and you're off plan. And the pain of failing over and over at losing weight (and watching my weight balloon over the years) has kept me hurting to the point that I was seeking comfort. Not comfort in food, but the comfort of not putting myself thru the pain of trying to lose weight. So I was either doing something about it or doing nothing about it. But the problem was that the something I was doing about it had to be perfect. Nobody's perfect, so why do I expect to do things perfectly?

So why would I go and eat like a piggie when not doing something about it? It wasn't the food itself that comforted me. (You've heard of "comfort food.") But it was the comfort of NOT failing at dieting that kept me going back to the food. Like "Ah, now that I'm not on a diet, I'm really going to enjoy this _________ (fill in the blank with restricted food of choice)." The pressure was off. How could I fail if I wasn't trying? I see it so clearly now.

I've been learning how negatively my perfectionistic ways have influenced my life for the worst for a little while now. But only now do I understand how and why it's plunged me into this vicious cycle of neverending dieting - always raring to go but never getting anywhere! I also see now exactly where the self-sabotaging comes into play. But more importantly, I now see how to deal with it and stop the cycle! Praise God!

Sorry to run on so long, I don't even know if this post applies to anybody else here. I realize that we're all different with different reasons for being overweight and different reasons we struggle. But it just thrills me to finally be able to see this for what it is and I just felt like sharing because I can relate to you ladies when it comes to self-sabotage. (And if it helps anybody then I'm glad I did share!)
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Old 08-22-2008, 10:13 AM   #99  
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WOW! Great conversation!

Wish we were all sitting around a table with some coffee.

Enygirl - You've got a LOT on your mind. All that family stuff can really mess with your head. It takes a LOT of courage to break habits and forge a new path. You're heading out alone into the unknown. Maybe your family will follow you, but maybe they won't.

I hear you about the "attention" thing, too. It can be uncomfortable when people make a big deal of the fact I've lost weight. My sister has helped me a lot by saying, "These people are your FRIENDS. They're proud of you. Accept the compliment and move on." She's right. As for men saying anything . . . I avoid eye contact and turn and walk away. When my dad brings it up, I change the subject, IMMEDIATELY.

As for Joe, if he loves you now, he LOVES YOU. If he doesn't love YOU, then don't you want to know before you get married? I'm betting he loves YOU and will be attracted to you, no matter your size.

I'm wondering how much of this mental baggage is keeping me at this weight. I lived most of my life around 170 and when I've gone lower, I haven't been able to maintain it. I'm scared, too! But you know what, I posted on here just yesterday about it and there are a LOT of people that once they made up their minds, got lower and STAYED LOWER. It may take 6 months to break through this plateau, but if I keep working on it, it will happen. I'm still clinically obese. I hate that word.

One thing I learned from "A New Earth" is that we can spend a lot of time worrying about stuff that hasn't happened yet, or we can STOP the negative thinking and focus on this moment. What is healthy for us at this moment.

It sounds to me like we've been worrying about the future instead of making today the healthiest day we can make it.
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Old 08-22-2008, 10:15 AM   #100  
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Blue - you and I were posting at the same time!

Yes! It isn't about being perfect! It isn't about doing without. It's all about balance.



Making good food choices, MOST of the time. Adding more activity. Focusing on US for a change instead of putting everybody else's needs first.
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Old 08-22-2008, 12:05 PM   #101  
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See this is why I keep posting in the Ultimate Challenge... I may be posting on this thread for the next 2 years, but DANG IT I WILL HIT MY GOAL!

GG - i too hate the "Clinically obese" phrase. I really need to push past this plateau. I'm #24 away from being "overweight". ugh.
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Old 08-22-2008, 01:06 PM   #102  
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Hi ladies! I want to respond to everyone but I will do that later when I get home. I'm leaving work in about an hour, going to the beauty supply store, then will get on the treadmill before I begin making excuses. Once I settle down, then I will read and respond.
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Old 08-23-2008, 04:38 PM   #103  
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Hi ladies, hope you're having a great day!

Just a quick check-in for me ... It would appear that adding calorie counting to my plan has helped me tremendously! I can hardly believe it but I've made my August goal! (And I say that quite cautiously because right about now is when I usually go and do something stupid to mess it up! So I'll be ecstatic if I can make it thru the weekend to Monday's "official" weigh-in.)

See y'all later!
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Old 08-23-2008, 09:47 PM   #104  
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Way to go Blue! I think I need to revamp my plan. I'm staying with in my calories (except for a few odd days) but I'm still not seeing results. I know that my exercise needs work, and I'm getting better at it. But I would like to see some rewards... maybe I need to stop focusing on the scale and focus on the strength I know I've gained, and my attitude change, and the fact that my clothes are fitting better. I know the number on the scale isn't the only way to determine success - it's just the most convenient!

I'm going to keep going at this.... I have to make these changes. I have to stop making excuses!!!
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Old 08-24-2008, 12:18 AM   #105  
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Eny--The attention is an issue for me too. I think you weren't paying attention to me when I was fat. Why now? I didn't like it when I was smaller. Men were more willing to help me or hold the door, etc..shallow! Also when I got down to 150 my BF was like you are too small. I told him this is not about you. This is about me.

Blue Serenity--I've always been an all or nothing person too. No grays. So I definitely identify with what you said. I'm very organized with my "ducks in a row" too. Weight loss has driven me crazy bc no matter how much I organize, journal, plan, etc it has been kicking my behind. Letting go has eased my burden and I feel so much better now.

gg--Is clinically obese and morbidly obese the same? I'm right there with you. I definitely agree one moment at a time.

Well yesterday I got home, got on the treadmill, and afterwards fell asleep. Same thing today. I went for my bi weekly ritual of mani/pedi, fell asleep, then got up and got on the treadmill. I can't wait for my vacation to start next week will be a whirlwind because I have a ton of stuff to do at work.

The topic today for Inside Out Weight Loss. Learned helplessness. It is a huge limiting belief for weight loss. It is the belief you can't lose weight. That you are powerless. This is the main reason I will not join Overeater's Anonymous (OA). They operate with the belief you are powerless over food. Not me. I will never believe that. Learned helplessness is not an issue for me. I know I can lose weight. To identify if it is a limiting belief for you finish the following statement:

I can't lose weight because....

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