Sisley...welcome! You are doing a great thing being open and seeking change. It's not easy, as I rediscover every day.

Ellis..your post really struck me --"it's not about punishment the rest of your life". It's hard to maintain that lifelong view of these changes but it's so true. I really need to keep remembering that.

Well, this day wasn't much better but I am ready to start over even now--no waiting until tomorrow. I will be glad to get back into the week. I will be gone this next weekend at a conference so I am wondering how I will do there!?!?

Have a good evening...Rikki

Thanks Ellis, I know what you are saying. I just wish I could get out of the cheat mindframe. Once I decide I am cheating I decide to make it worth the guilt trip.

Sisley, opening up and talking about your problems with food I think really helps. It makes you look at the problem and not just ignore it anymore. Good luck!

Bree, it is weird, isn't it. You thought you were the only crazy one that felt this way. :lol: Knowing the thoughts I have about food aren't just because I am crazy is nice. Nuts are healthy, in moderation. More than 10 or so nuts is probably too much fat. They are good fats, but still too much isn't good for you.

So my weekend was just one big :censored:. I started Friday at 1780 calories, Saturday I was up to 1808, Sunday I did better at 1627 but yesterday - boy I really wanted to celebrate the end of my big bad cheat weekend at 2232 calories! :o Holy crap. Way too much chocolate. I have my follow up appointment with my doctor to see how I am doing without my waterpills. With the crappy food intake and getting my period yesterday I am not sure how he will be able to tell. I am sure I am up in weight and bloat. But it is my own darn fault! :dizzy:

I am, of course, back on plan today. Work days are just much better for me. I am starting to dread weekends because they are such a battle for me. Being back on plan is always harder after you have been off. So I have decided if I can stay on plan until Friday I will get a pedicure. :D

Greetings!
 

Hello lovelies! :wave: I hope everyone is doing well today.

Yes, I wasn't around all weekend and I'm sorry. :sorry: I should be ashamed of myself, really, but I just wasn't in the mood to mess with a computer. :no: I hope I'm forgiven. :?:

At any rate... A HUGE WELCOME to our newcommers - RLK, Bree and Sisley! I'm so glad that you found us! :cb: This thread is such an amazing source of support for me. You can say what you want, how you feel, talk about problems you're having - and of course discuss happy moments, successes and revelations all here! No one judges you, :judge: condemns you or makes you feel badly about yourself :o and THAT, to me, is priceless! :yes:

Leenie - have a fantastic vacation and how adorable that your little one is starting school. :bb: I hope she really enjoys it. I still remember going to the store to get 'school supplies' and to this day there's something about different colored paper, pens and all the 'supplies' that keeps me wandering down the 'school' aisles - even when I don't need a darn thing! **** I even collect pens! :rofl:

Ellis - Welcome back sweetie! I'm so tickled that those 2lbs melted back off like butter. :cp: I'm certain it was just water weight and I wish I would have been here earlier to tell you not to stress! :nono: You and I are sister soul mate worry warts I swear! :lol: The key thing to remember is that even though you may think "CHIPS!" during a time of crisis and eat them, :corn: it doesn't mean that you still haven't made many small but important lifestyle changes. Just think... at least now you are aware of eating the chips and whatever else, and what you will have to do to correct the 'oops' whereas before, at least if you are anything like me, you'd have eaten the chips, then some pie, then some whatever, etc. :hun: and then just felt guilty about it :tired: and eat again to mask the guilt. Now you're taking action and that is SO important and a great achievement! :flow1: Just remember, ants can't take big steps but somehow they always get their houses built - one grain of sand at a time!

Melissa - your post really hit home with me.

Originally Posted by :
Once I decide I am cheating I decide to make it worth the guilt trip.

My LIFE, that is SO true! :yes: When I cheat, oh boy do I cheat! :tantrum: It can't be a small cheeseburger or something - noooooooo, it has to be half the damn menu! :cbg: As a matter of fact I'm sitting here this moment thinking about what junk food sounds good and it's all because I got on the scale this morning (and yesterday morning, and the morning before, etc.) and I've only dropped another 3 lbs. :bomb: My weigh in is officially tomorrow, but I'm still mad. A lady I'm computer pals with, who is also doing MF, is losing at about 4lbs a week while I piddle around with 2 and 3lbs. :rollpin: I mean I KNOW that 3lbs is good and that even 2lbs is good but still.. it's like I'm in a race with everyone else :moped: and when I lose, I get mad and think, oh what the ****'s the point? :dunno: Then I cheat, I get ill, :barf: I get mad that I cheated :mad: and even more angry that I could have lost more if I'd only have stuck to plan and around and around it goes. :dizzy: I, too, wonder if this reward/punishment behavior will carry on for the rest of my life. :?: I hope not or I'll be living off of mashed potatoes and jello in a divided plate at the loony hospital. :p

As for me, I'm still on track but having a really hard time with head hunger. :censored: I'm also bored with my program because it just isn't giving me the rush I want or need right now. :shrug: I need to be able to get on that scale, at least ONCE in awhile, and see a 5lb loss instead of 2 or 3lbs. :goodscale I know weight is weight, but I also know that you all understand what I mean when I say that sometimes it just isn't enough and it brings you WAY down. :cry:

I do think that I'm going to decrease my water intake though. :rain: I've been consuming 80oz or more of water everyday, plus my shakes, plus my Metamucil drinks, etc and I just really think it's too much. On the days I drink all my water, I don't really feel any better and I've also noticed that on the days where I don't get all my water in, the scale moves down! It's like I'm still retaining water despite nearly drowning myself in it. So, I think I'm going to cut back to 64 oz a day plus the other stuff and see how that goes. I guess I'm still working to find the magical combination :wizard: that will increase my weight loss, even on such a restrictive program. It's like, if I eat an oatmeal, one snack bar and have 3 shakes, will I lose less or more than if I just have all shakes or whatever. :dizzy: Maybe the people on the MF forum are right and I actually need 6 supplements a day. Maybe my body isn't getting enough and thinks it's starving. :eek: Who the **** knows? :devil: Maybe purple monkeys will fly out of my backside tonight and I'll wake up 20lbs lighter tomorrow. Why oh why I do this to myself ... Why can't I just be satisfied with what IS? :dunno: I guess I'll never know. Ah well... baby steps...

Rosetta - How many supplements do you have each day? I'm just curious because maybe I am getting too few..

Hang in there all and thanks for the vent session! :D

Love and hugs :grouphug:
Alisha :hat:

Melissa, I relate so much to what you wrote, especially that sentence that Alisha also quoted. Surprisingly though, my weekends seem to be better lately, and weekdays worse. It used to be the other way round. Oh, and I guess it's a good thing I got rid of all those nuts yesterday. Well not good that I did, but good they're gone. ;) And you can definitely do this and have a nice pedicure on Friday! :D

Alisha, hi! :wave: Thanks for the welcome! :D What you said ("It can't be a small cheeseburger or something - noooooooo, it has to be half the damn menu!") - that's so me. Not so much when eating out, but when nobody sees me. :o

Today hasn't been too good food-wise again. It usually starts after lunch. I'm okay in the mornings, when I'm at work (lots of food there, grocery store, but I'm fine there). There is a bag of chips upstairs (I live with my parents at the moment, long story), and I had really, really bad cravings. But I couldn't get myself to go have a few, because I knew that I couldn't just have a few, and how would I explain to my mother when she notices the whole bag is gone... that actually scared me enough to keep me from eating it all. Didn't keep me from the chocolate though. On the bright side, I got my workout in today, and tomorrow will be a new and better day. :cool:

I hope everyone is having a good day!

Alisha--thanks for the welcome and boy do I relate to some of your thoughts! It is nice to know I am not alone! What does MF stand for, by the way??

I got way too hungry today because I was at a dr appt FOREVER so I drove through McD's and that wasn't good. I wish I could take it back but oh well. I will start over again.

Hope everyone is having a great day!! Rikki

Ah - so many new posts and so little time! Welcome to the newbies. We are all struggling to tame the food demons. I think I reached a turning point this weekend. Was daunted to face a long weekend without the prospect of food and drink. Kept tempting myself. Rationalizing that it was only a small slip and I could get back on the wagon. But as opportunities came my way to break the fast, I kept thinking: Is it really worth it for a biscotti, for a processed turkey sandwich, for a bag of popcorn? I just couldn't come up with a good reason to break the fast so I didn't. By yesterday evening, I was happy with myself (especially since the scale shows a good loss). Now I think I can get through the 2-day weekends easier. But it all comes down to constant decision-making.
Alisha - I have 5 100-calorie supplements a day. I actually tend to consume close to 700 calories because I'm using milk and sugar in my tea (won't give that up) and having a small apple now and then.
Gotta run - time for my weigh-in at the clinic.

Hey everyone--just thought I would share that I lost 1.2 lbs. It's an exciting start for me!! Have a great Wednesday...Rikki

Rosetta - Fantastic job staying on plan. That is a huge accomplishment. I know how hard it can be to battle the demons in your head. It is not your stomach that wants food, but your brain! Weird, isn't it! :devil:

Alisha - It is so great that you know exactly what I mean about the guilt trip thing. I do have days where there is a small cheat and I just get back on track. It's like once I pass the 1500 calorie mark though, all **** breaks loose. It is fabulous that you are still on track with your plan. The 2/3 lb losses are great! I know it is hard though, when other people are losing more than you. :wizard: Stay on track, it will happen!

Manu - I am glad so many people understood my guilt trip comment. It was just one thought, but it helps us all know we aren't the only people with these food problems. Keep going with the workouts, your food will catch up. I always find that if I exercise, it is easier to stay on track with my food. If I am going to drag my butt out of bed to exercise then I better stay on plan! :D

RLK - Yay! Great Loss! :cp: Ya know, McDonald's doesn't have to be a bad choice. If I am starving and have to get something I will get the Apple Dippers (w/o caramel) or a Fruit/Yogurt Parfait. At least one of those will tide me over until I get home to eat something better for me. Also, if you have to eat there, a McGrill chicken w/o mayo isn't that bad either, especially if you only eat 1/2 the bun. I know exactly what to get at each fast food place to stay on plan.

So.... I stayed on plan yesterday. Go me! I am up to 166lbs today. I know some of that is bloat from my period, but at least 1/2lbs is probably from my bad weekend. I did see my doc and my blood pressure was fine. My hands and feet were a little swollen, but with my period it is hard to tell if it is a problem. He is not worried though, he said he will see me in December, before I run the 1/2 marathon, just for a check up. I went to the gym this morning and will be on plan for the rest of the day. :crossed:

Happy Wednesday!
 

Hi everyone and good morning/afternoon! :wave:

Manu - I know exactly what you mean about the "when nobody sees me" thing. :o MY problem is that I live alone so, other than my 3 cats, no one EVER sees me and that is BAD! :yes: I almost wish I had a roomate just so I wouldn't be able to eat crap at home. I guess this is one demon I'm just going to have to beat one day... :devil:

Rikki - believe you, me... you are NOT alone with your thoughts. :no: I think just about every single one of us on here has issues with food or has had them at some point. That's why I'm so glad to have found this place :cp: because it's very lonely when you have no one who understands your problems. I think social support is just as important as psycho therapy. So... vent at will. ;) And what a fantastic loss! :cb: I'm very proud of your accomplishment!! :cheer: Oh.. and MF stands for Medifast, which is the program I'm following.

Rosetta - thank you so much for the heads up. :thanks: I know your program is different than mine, slightly, but I just had to get an idea if I was actually starving my body. On a good day, where I only eat supplements, I'm getting between 450 to 550 calories a day, give or take an extra 20-60 cals for my Metamucil. I guess 450 really isn't much, so maybe I should throw in an extra supplement and see how it goes. :dunno: Either way I really appreciate your input. :D I'm also SO very proud of you for saying no to all the bad food! :encore: You really should pat yourself on the back because ANY time you do that, it is a HUGE step in battling food demons. Weigh to go Rosetta!! :goodscale

Melissa - Heh, I think just about every single one of us feels that you hit the nail on the head with your comment! :grouphug: I love when someone (and even myself, from time to time) can put feelings into words that really ring true. I think when that happens, we all read it and it causes us all to self-reflect, which can be an important tool in fighting our food foes. :rollpin: Please hold back on the praise for me, however, because I did exactly as I was sure I would - although not as bad as I thought... I had crap again to shut the voices up. :cry: You would have THOUGHT I'd have learned my lesson before.. in fact I was certain to the core of my very being that I'd learned my lesson before, but noooo... :tantrum: I just had to do it. Although I will say that I did not go through a fast food joint. For some insane reason I wanted picnic/bbq food! :censored: So, I got some hot dogs, some chili for them, potato salad and macaroni salad, some Tostitos and of course a damn pie. :mad: HOWEVER... I ate only 2 hotdogs, left the buns, ate about 3 tablespoons of each salad, about 2 tablespoons of pie, about 4 chips and that was it. I was so scared of making myself ill that I stopped! But, I guess not soon enough. So, AGAIN, I was up all night in pain from my IBS, :faint: vomited everything I ate back up around 3am :barf: and rolled around my bed in agony until I got up at 6:00am for work. :yawn: So no, I really don't deserve any praise. In fact, I think I'm just insane! :dizzy: Thank you anyway though. But weigh to go YOU for sticking to your plan! :hyper: It also sounds like you have your blood pressure in check and after your period passes, I bet everything will be much less swollen. I'm so happy for you!!! :cloud9: I bet your doctor is proud too and he/she should be!

So, other than my stupid, idiotic, ******ed debauchery last night, I forced myself to get on the scale regardless. Amazingly enough I'm down another half a pound for a total of 3.5lbs this week. :shrug: There's no way what I consumed had more than 3,500 calories in it so maybe, just maybe, it won't show and I'll carry on. I'll cross my fingers. :crossed:

Anyway all, I hope the day is going well for you and keep on keeping on. Despite it all, we'll get there!

All the very best.

Alisha :hat:

Hello everyone! How's your day going? I am having a GREAT day which I attribute to the "weight loss high". I feel motivated and when does that happen??

Alisha--you are so funny. :rofl: I do enjoy reading your posts! We all screw up in one way or another and fall hard off plan but the true test is if/when we rise again. Right??

Melissa--Thanks for the fast food advice. I know I could make a better choice but the cheeseburger and fries cry out, you know? :burger: I will work on that.

Well, I forced myself to drink a jug of water but I am still hungry :hungry: so I guess I will have a small snack. I wanted to save all my points for supper at my parents' house but I guess that won't be possible. I don't want to show up starving because the snacks there are BAD! :devil:

You guys really are inspiring to me so thanks for letting me join you all.

Later everyone! Rikki :woo:

Hi, all. I had a good weigh-in last night and decided to change my avatar to reflect that. (The man who had lost 30 lbs gained 2 lbs this week (tee hee :devil: ). Anyway, I'm energized by the latest loss and that will keep me going for awhile.
Melissa - glad your blood pressure is in control without drugs. All those gym visits will help.
Rikki - water doesn't really fill me up either, but I need to drink more than I do. Why not have an apple? I find that satifies my need to crunch something and also fills me up without using up a lot of calories.
Alisha - Don't wish for a roommate to keep you on program. All the roommates I ever had were partners in crime. Whenever we got bored it was right to the junk food. :p Congratulations on the half lb and for at least controlling the binge. I've gotten cravings in the past and have eaten myself stupid.

I didn't do great at my parents house--had way too much taco salad. But, I did say no to a blizzard afterwards so that was good!!!

Rosetta--I thought I would try the water but I definitely needed a snack. I ended up having some carrots and a wasa cracker with that laughing cow cheese--all that for a total of 1 WW point.

Well, my kids are getting cranky so I better go...Rikki

Darlings, I don't even have time to read! Just wanted to send you all hugs as I'm rushing out the door... will try to get back in this evening if I can keep my tired old head from hitting the pillow too early... :grouphug:

Good morning girlies! Nice to see you ellis! Stop back and chat soon.

Alisha! :nono: Be carefuful, Please! The binge/purge track you are on is nothing but bad for you. I know you are not purging on purpose, but it still hurts your body just the same. I am very happy for your weight loss this week. :D Hopefully, it will keep you on track. Hang tough! You'll make it.

Rosetta, yay for getting to change your ticker! It is such a little thing, but makes you feel good. :p

Rikki, parents houses are tough. My mom praises my weight loss, then tries to force dessert on me. Very weird! :dizzy:

Since there are so many newbies here, I thought I would throw in a little info about me. I am 34, married, with a beautiful 3 year old daughter. I work for a steel manufacturing company. I have lost my weight by calorie counting and exercising. As they like to say around here... EAT LESS, MOVE MORE! I stay between 1200/1300 calories during the week and 1500 on Friday/Saturday. I do at least 30 minutes of cardio four times a week and 2 sessions each week of upper/lower body strength training. I have been at this for just over a year.

I did stay on plan yesterday. I have to get through today, then tomorrow and I have earned my pedicure.

Hello everyone! :wave: I'm sitting at work pretty bored out of my mind so I thought I'd drop you all a post.

Rikki - What a super job at saying no to a Blizzard! :cp: I can't imagine that there was much in taco salad that would hurt you, so I'm sure you'll be rewarded the next weigh day! :yes: I know what you mean about the water thing too. I just never feel full drinking water. As I mentioned in a previous post, I'm going to bring my own intake down to 64oz (plus my other fluids) instead of drowning myself with 80oz and see how that goes. :shrug: A lot of people think water makes them feel full but I just feel like I've ingested too much pool water. :p I hate that sloshy feeling. So, I think having a small snack was the better choice before you got overly hungry and went hog wild :ink: - something I'm VERY familiar with. You're doing an outstanding job!!! :bravo:

Rosetta - Your weight loss is fantabulous! :cheer: You should be smiling from ear to ear with that kind of loss. These programs you and I are on are NOT easy by any means (with all the temptations out there) but truly they work so well! :flow1: Heh, and you're probably right about the roomate thing! That's all I need is a chocaholic living in the house! :fr: On the bright side at least I'm not temped by my cats' kibbles! :flow2:

Ellis - Big hugs! :grouphug: Take one moment at a time and I hope to see you back here when you're able. You're always so full of nice things to say! I hope whatever you're doing, you're having a good time! :cloud9:

And Melissa dear - thank you very much for your concern. :thanks: Believe me when I say that being sick is NOT something I want - I guess that's why I get so frustrated with myself for doing something that makes me ill! :tantrum: I'm the kind of person who will do whatever they can NOT to toss their cookies but, for some reason, I just can't seem to eat anything and not get sick. :barf: I think a lot is stress, :stress: some of it is because it's probably a shock to my system when I go off program :sp: and then it's my IBS on top of it all. :faint: I guess it's a lesson to stay on plan which I must force myself to learn. :o I really appreciate your concern though! I will promise to be better. I guess it's like Yoda says, there is no try, there is only do. Do or do not, but there is no try. :nono: And please let me say again how proud I am of you for your dilegence. :high: You have lost SO much weight and you have done it off your own back in a very hard way. Calorie counting and exercising are just things I can't stick with and I so admire people like you who have so much strength to do it. You really are special. :woo:

As for me, I'm down that pesky .5 of a lb that was keeping me away from a 4lb loss yesterday. :D It sounds so silly, but I'm really glad. I'm back on track for this week so I'll see how it goes. :crazy:

Anyway, everyone take care! I'll post again tomorrow.

Alisha :hat: