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p.s. I too think that's great Vanessa!! I'm proud of you! I wish I had that testimony. I was a druggie which led to other things with it, that I am not proud of at all, but I do believe that the way I was in growing up made me who I am today. I thank God for deliverance and change! (now if I can just accept His freedom from living in bondage with food!) :faint: <----really love that smiley! (lol)
skippy oxo |
one more p.s. Whenever I tell my testimony of how I used to be a druggie, I alway like to clarify that 1)I'm not now and 2) when I became a Mom I wasn't.....I always worry that someone might not know that and being the worrier that I am, I always think I need to include that. :faint:
skippy :) |
About a 1/3 less nauseated today. Took my pills when I left work so I think I am sleeping through the full blast of the side effects till I can get past this. I just hope it doesn't take 3-4 weeks. :p
Well I have been a druggie and a slut. Call it my low self-esteem or my proclivity for addiction. And I have been both while I was married and had a child. No I wasn't always present, and I definitely would have made a few different decisions, but thats the thing, everbody's life is a journey and its all their own. What things would I change? Maybe the hurting other people part, other than that not much. I had to learn my way. I am one of those no matter how many times you tell them the stove is hot, I got to touch it anyway. A tactile learner :lol: Or in other words to get anything through my thick skull I gotto mess it up. Skippy-Are you eating cause you miss your kids? And what is a safe diet pill? Christy- You are freak. JK! :lol: I think thats awesome that DH was the only one. Hot dogs? I hope they are the identifiable parts :p Vanessa- I think thats amazing. No one in my family has kept their virginity past 15. My mom said, "I just don't understand why you girls are so horny". Dead Like ME is TV series. I am not sure who writes it but the background is that its about working as a Grim Reaper. It has Jasmine Guy and the very sexy Mandy Pantikin. Glad you enjoyed Resident Evil 2. I will probably wait for video, cause it softens the gore part for me. I love horror I hate gore. Kat- How did positive self thoughts go today? Jenelle-Did the doc say why he was scheduling one before 40? Reminder ya'll Breast Cancer Awareness is coming up in October. Tracy- I got those warts from my ex-husband Scott. Ugh! Gross. They said I might have outbreaks again, but I never have. Have you? (Good soapbox about what we all should have our yearly and don't forget to come and whine about it like me ;) ) On that note I have work to do. God Bless US! :love: Chris |
(((((Chris)))))))
I wasn't sure if I wanted to send my last "p.s" or not because I didn't want to offend anyone, but worry and fear talked my insecure self into sending it anyway... :?: I lost my virginity at 15 also. I became a druggie at 15 also. I ended up doing hard drugs at 15. Started out smoking pot, ended up doing cocaine all the time, lsd, and ended up a green bean. (pcp) I was totally in the drug crowd, pretty much lived with them, and then God sent my husband to the drug house, he was on drugs too, but somehow, I immediately felt a connection to him (even though I hardly knew him). I got pregnant right away, and as soon as I found out, I stopped doing all the drugs and everything else too. We got married about 2 months later and have been married for 17 years. I am convinced that God sent us to each other. Our first child we feel like was our miracle to get out of that life we were in. My bridesmaid went to prison for a very long time (years) for having a crack house. She was a mother too, and lost her children. Several of my friends ended up in jail or prison. I look at that and I think, Thank-You God for setting me free of that. I love my kids so much(!), I am so glad that I was able to be set free of that life before I had them. However, in saying that, I want to make sure I say, I don't think I am any better than any of my friends I hung out with. They just weren't able to find the freedom when I did, but some found it later, and some never have. It's a very hard thing to let go of things that have such a hold on us. Where I used to be more judgemental of that, I no longer am, because I know that no one "wants" anything to have a hold like that over them, and many try, but they lose that battle. But I have faith and hope that one day we will all win our battles, through God's help and deliverance. Someone told me that maybe I traded in my drug/alcohol addiction for food (sweets). Knowing that I wasn't going to do them anymore when I became a Mom (married), I traded them for sweets, which has led to addiction in "that" now. That makes sense to me actually. So why can't I find that same freedom? Maybe because I don't think it effects my family, although it does if I die from a heart attack from eating bad. :?: Anyway, it's my hope and prayer that everyone, no matter what their addiction, finds freedom and deliverance from bondage in our lives. Thank God for forgiveness, grace, mercy and His Love. :love: Chris, maybe we met up somewhere before! You never know! ;) I agree with you, maybe a few things I would change, but basically, I'd probably do things the same, because I learned the things I did through my experiences. I hope and pray I pass down positive things through those experiences to my kids, so that they will be filled with love, hope and peace for their own life. :) Sorry to go on and on! :faint: I drank a bunch of coffee and I can't be quiet when I drink a lot of coffee! :coffee: Love, skippy oxo |
Vanessa - good for you!! If I could undo my premarital activities, I think I would (well, mostly ;) ).
Skippy - hugs to you. Would you believe annoying neighbor brought me chocolates last night? I'm going to throw them away in a dramatic fashion right now. |
Good morning! It is a bee-utiful, cool morning here. I love it!
(((skippy and Chris))) -- You two have done an amazing job at turning your lives around! That takes more strength and determination than I think I possess. One of the reasons I never dabbled in drugs or sex (of the premarital kind!!) was that I feared I would become so caught up in it that I wouldn't be able to let it go. I've always known I have addictive tendencies, if that makes sense. But the only ones I've indulged are food (obviously) and retail therapy. It hurt my heart to hear you refer to yourselves as "druggie" or "slut" though. Those are such harsh, judgemental words! Then I thought that maybe you were just stating your facts. For example, I will refer to myself as "fat" not to down myself or anything, just because it is the word that describes the state of my body. Make sense? Anyway, I admire you two a lot! Big hugs coming your way this morning... Gotta go get ready for church. BBL! Love and hugs, Christy |
Hey girls! Such a beautiful morning! I really don't know what persuaded myself to remain a virgin, though I believe it was my faith in the HP. No one ever lectured me to be safe or remain abstinent, my friends were quite the opposite of me LOL My parents never talked to me about sex either. But my brothers are the same way too, so who knows. Maybe it was just growing up in solitude, big farm, small community, church, etc. Kudos to Chris and Skippy for their positive changes!! Being in the field that I work in, I know it's super hard to change your lifestyle and not wanting to go back. I pray that all my patients will see the light and freedom. I'm just super glad that you guys did! I'm proud of you guys, it's really inspirational.
Tracy-Chocolate?? I haven't had chocolate in ages. LOL What was your dramatic fashion like?? LOL Chris-Does that show have Anthony Michael Hall in it?? What station is it on? I'm really interested in this! I'm glad your feeling better! Just remember I have a stockpile of rolaids and nyquil and I can send some your way! BTW, what is your fave horror film? Skippy-How many cups did you have?? LOL I never tasted coffee before?! Weird? I'm like that when I drink alot of diet mt. dew.. Diet pills are not safe sweetheart! I have faith in you that are strong and can overcome this! Keep your head up sista! Christy-Hey there! I think I have addictive tendencies also, maybe that's why I have OCD? Retail therapy?? LOL Mine is ebay therapy!!!! Glad your doing ok, my thoughts are with this morning! Hey to Jennelle(please get your check up! :)) Kat, Linoleum, Sandi, CeeJay. The morning is here and I believe I will read the sunday paper. May the day be blessed ladies and we shall enjoy it to the fullest! love Vanessa |
Chris...I've never seen "Dead Like Me." Is it on HBO? I don't have HBO. And I thought I was the only one who thought Mandy Patinkin was sexy! I used to watch Chicago Hope just 'cause he was on it! :love: (And of course, my husband watched it to drool over his honey, Christine Lahti.)
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Morning all
DH and I are going hiking today. Since nature is my church, I am really looking forward to it. I just hope it's not too hot.
I can't relate to waiting for marriage or the abuse of drugs - dabbled in both ;) but do not regret a thing. We all have different paths to take. I'm very happy with my path (minus the COE - but that's still a part of my path so I must accept it). I hope any of you who are upset by the choices you made learn to accept them and move on. Easier said than done, I know. :) :grouphug: Vanessa, I thinks it is great that you are waiting for marriage since that's what you want to do - good for you! :) The more we listen to ourselves and live the lives we were meant to live, the better off we'd (general we) all be. :) Today's affirmation: 1. I will remain in touch with HP all day, keeping an open line of communication with her. |
Well, scratch that
DH didn't get a good night's sleep so we are bumping our hiking day to next weekend. Or maybe on Thursday since I have the day off.
We used to hike a few times a month but haven't done it regularly in a year or 2. We decided the other day to make it a part of our lives again. |
Meditation
Hazelden Meditation Series
I am more than my weight. Whether I am size extra small, small, medium, large, or extra large, my poundage is only one aspect of the total me. We are each a child of creation. Every one of us is special. We each have an important contribution to make. We have the opportunity to discover our potential, the totality of our being, which transcends size and weight. We can accept ourselves just as we are, at this moment, whether we are thin or fat or in the middle, because the body we have right now is the one in which our complete self lives. Nurturing that self is what we are doing when we follow the Twelve Steps along with our food plan. We are unlocking our potential as complete human beings, as we work in recovery to develop our spiritual, emotional, and physical sides. A Higher Power directs the unfolding of our total personality. * I can be assured of my individual worth and dignity, whatever I weigh today. |
"...the body we have right now is the one in which our complete self lives."
That's the part of the meditation that spoke to me the most, Kat. :) |
Evening!
Just wanted to stop by again and say hello. :) DH and I did not hike but we did go for a walk in a nature reserve. It felt really good to be surrounded by trees and wildlife.
Jennelle, I love that line, too! |
I feel horrible I can't possibly catch up. but our summer season is dying off and I'll be able to post more soon.
Skippy I just wanted to comment on your "druggie" clarification so to speak. I know exactly how you feel about that because I am the same way. I know how some people say once an addict always an addict but that is BS as you and I both know :) ((((((HUGS )))))) to you sweetie. Chris I love that new avatar, it makes me want to do ballet ;) which would be extremely comical to watch, I promise that if I decide to try some ballet (inspired by your avatar) then I will tape it so you can all have a good laugh, even better perhaps I'll record myself singing opera which is pretty funny as well ;) ok I'm off track sorry girl lol, Chris how are you doing? Vannessa way to go on the sex issue I think that is great!! Jennelle and Christie how is school going? Iknow I've missed someone and I"m so sorry. But hello to you as well! I have to get ready for work I'll TTYL!!!! Love to all Michelle |
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