Hey there...I'm pretty new to this site and have been looking around for some threads that might be a fit for me and I'm certain this is one...I am for sure a binge and compulsive i eater and I could relate to almost every post I read...this has been a problem since I was about 11 years old...

I eat all the time for every emotion then feel extreme guilt and shame because of it...if I'm not eating food I'm thinking about it...I even force myself to eat when I'm feeling bad or some type of way that's negative cause that's whet I usually do to feel better but it of course never works...

I just want to be rid of this craziness ...I hope this is the beginning of that

I realize that was a bit of a rant

@hopesfull Welcome! This thread is basically for rants that you don't want to make into a new post so don't worry about that. You're going to encounter negative emotions for the rest of your life, come up with a way to deal with them that doesn't involve food, take food off the table as a potential response.

Today is Day 6 for me and all is going well as far as I'm aware. I like counting numerical days instead of days of the week, it takes some of the pressure off of Sunday being the day to binge and stops me from feeling like I need to 'restart' every Monday. Still, I anticipate this weekend won't be easy, I would ecstatic to make it through 10 days. I haven't gone that long all summer.

I hear you, hopesfull! I can so identify with what you are saying. I too am hoping to find some answers and a way out of this craziness I've experienced most of my life. Best wishes to you. Cat

So today makes a week for me. I was initially happy about it but I've gone from feeling very accomplished and happy for myself to self loathing, insecurity, and apathy as staying on plan has allowed me to shift focus from staving off binge eating to other issues in my life. Throughout today I have been very critical and nit picky about my body, more so than I have been all week, during which I felt a sort of comfort from the knowledge that I was working on it and making progress. Suddenly a week free of binge eating no longer feels like much of an accomplishment and I look down on my former self for ever succumbing to it (it has ONLY been a week!). I question what things I truly expect from achieving my goal figure and whether those things are actually attainable, whether or not I counted calories strictly enough this past week to constitute staying on plan, and how long it will take for apathy and anxiety to prompt another binge to distract myself from life again.

I don't have physiological cravings anymore, those pretty much stopped when I started getting proper rest and stopped eating carbs, but I still have the psychological craving once in a while to buy a bunch of junk (Chips Ahoy have been advertised as 'on sale' for weeks now and every time I walk past that aisle in Walmart I think about buying a package) and eat it all because I'm used to it and because why not, junk food tastes good and I'm not worth all of the attention I give to diet and exercise. I bought an iced coffee today as a sort of reward but it tasted like it had extra cream and sugar to the point of passing the advertised 140 calories mark, I drank it all anyway. I'm not sure if I feel guilty about drinking it or not but I felt the need to mention it.

Well, that has got to be one of the most melodramatic posts about reaching a goal on this site. It felt good to write it all out at least.

Binge free for over six weeks now. Which is good, but so far fom my all-time record of 19 weeks. But feeling somewhat optimistic I can break my record...fingers crossed..,

I need to join this thread again as I had some binge issues this past weekend. I want to gain control and get back to losing weight again. In the past, this thread has helped me to gain control of my eating. I was feeling lonely and I was really tired over the weekend so I turned to food for comfort :(. Today I feel AWFUL from all the junk I ate. I'm trying to turn it around and get back on track. I WILL make it through the day binge free. I am following the Weight Watchers plan so I have logged every bite so far.

granola- i hope you're doing ok. one week is an amazing accomplishment, you're finally breaking the pattern.

kitty-woohoo on 6 weeks. keep it up.

hopesfull- we've all been there, done that. wish you luck and welcome.

so i've been thinking about binging a lot lately but i haven't succumbed yet, i'm just waiting for it to happen. so far i've been strong and i resisted, though the urges weren't that strog, but still. this is going to be tough week, i just finished with my last exam, i have 5 days to pack, move all my stuff to a new apprtment in the biggest heat wave and pack again to return home for the summer. i can't wait to go home, in about 4 weeks i'm suppose to attend a wedding where all my family is going to be who hasn't seen me in a few years. some saw me when i was skinny but most of them saw me when i was at my heaviest. right now i'm somewhere in the middle and i feel so nervous seeing them after a long time. they will be critiquing me a lot, and i'm working my hardest to lose at least a few pounds till then but my scale is protesting and it hasn't budged over a week. i'm not giving up, i keep telling myself it's a water retention from "exercising" . here's to a positive and successfull week!
man am i happy exams are over :)

@Gettinfit Good luck!

@misssunshine I'm doing alright now, thanks, I've got 5 weeks until school starts back up again so we're on a similar weight loss timeline.

I guess I binged today, it was bad in terms of all the food but not bad psychologically, I'm not really distressed or too upset about it.

I did a sort of pen pal like exchange with someone abroad (planned for probably a month or more), we both sent each other a box of candies and such, my package came today and I kind of decided to just eat all of it at once (Had to run out the house this morning for an appointment and skipped breakfast and I really wanted to eat breakfast at home so waited until I got home (about 7 hours after getting up) to eat anything and there was the package).

I'm not really mad about it because there's no way I was going to throw it all out (lots of foreign stuff I haven't tried, too) or give it away after all of that planning, so it was going to get eaten (by me) eventually and I didn't want it in the house temping me all day every day so that binge was sort of inevitable. It's all I've eaten all day. I've been trying, generally, to not do the whole starvation after a binge thing but I'm not really hungry and it was A LOT of candy, also I want an empty stomach for breakfast tomorrow.

And I've finally come to terms with the fact that I've got to cut back on my salt intake, even though it doesn't have any calories the bloating is becoming a real problem making me want to binge to 'empty' myself and drinking an obscene amount of water to combat it doesn't actually work. My crazy salt intake is the last unhealthy part of my diet so I'm happy to finally be doing something about it.

Eh, tomorrow is a new day, I guess I'll call it Day 1.

one week till the end of the month girls! how're you doing?
it's so hot here it's driving me crazy.
i'm hanging in there, it's hard but i try to resist a little bit more.
the scale is not moving at all!! i've been on 1300-1500 cal for a few weeks now and i walk a lot plus do some strength exercise and nothing. :/ i'm worried that i totally screwed up my metabolism with gaining -losing the same 10 pounds the last two years? at this point i have no idea what my bmr is...i always thought it was about 2000 cal, but obviously it's not. i don't want to spend the rest of my life on 1500 cal when i reach my goal :(

I've been good since Monday, it can be hard to tell sometimes if I'm losing or not, sometimes it's clear that I am but at other times I feel the same size as a week ago. It's like I feel the same amount of fat but I seem to look better. I'll give it another week and then re-evaluate, I really don't want to have to cut daily calories.

Made it to 7 weeks binge free then binged. I was in the hospital and got out a day early, which I think caused me some distress. I have had to be on a special diet for the treatment I was hospitalized for, and I was so excited to go back to the foods I wasn't allowed to have.

I think I could have managed the food thing, but I'm realizing that it is the emotional loneliness and total isolation I'm feeling that set me off. I have to be isolated from others due to the radiation exposure; I can't even be at home to see my cats so I'm at a hotel. I feel totally alone, and in unfamiliar surroundings, I feel like nobody cares about me and that I'm totally on my own in life. I hate the leader I support at work because he makes me feel like crap even though I put in an unbelievable amount of effort to help him succeed. I am taking a two-week vacation in early September and he is angry that people would even consider taking time off when there is a big work project going on until October. Jerk. But it makes me feel guilty.

So I'm alone, isolated, overworked, and completely unhappy with my life, and totally disoriented due to my hospitalization and recovery. And I have been binging.

I will start off on a fresh slate tomorrow...

Things didn't go according to plan and in response I lost control; I need a plan B for next time. Here comes August.


EDIT: Ugh, I want to be sick. I'm so disgusted and angry with myself, I was doing really well and to think of all the points I could have stopped by didn't, why? I wish I could stay inside and fast for a week but I have to go work, I wish I could call out sick, I hardly slept and feel terrible.

EDIT2: And I'm continuing to binge today, at this point I guess it's just from a lack of discipline or concern.

I'm still binging. Can't stop. Worst binge episode since I started therapy eight months ago. I feel sick as I look in the mirror, I'm so fat and bloated.

I want to die.

Hope you're doing better, Kitty. I think I overate a little today but I wasn't really counting, dinner was sort of disgusting, ugh I hate disappointing meals.