I am a emotional eater and im 19 , it sucks, my life has been a really rough one but right now i am trying to get into shape to gain a confidence that ive never really had. im always so hard on myself and crying or getting angry or eating about it... i am starting a new healthy eating and work out routine tomorrow but having exercise induced asthma my apartment stairs kill me as is.... is this really something i should do. i think the hardest part and the reason i am always failing is my boyfriend he is such a fa a atty and has a awesome metabolism , me i dont digest i bloat and i have ibs so yeah im not so lucky as he is, its just so hard to sit there eating healthy while he is a fatty. im going to try my hardest to have him eat good at home and at work he can have a lil something naughty FOOD WISE! behind my back lol. ive been telling him he is gaining a gut and he wants it gone ..men.. does anyone have tips to stay in control and motivate not only yourself but your significant other...i really wanna be in a bikini and confident this coming summer its my dream... how can i have my man be my rock not the wind that pushes me off the cliff and into a taco bell lol...[/FONT]

Are you serious ? Many women at 5'4" would be thrilled to weigh 115. At 97 pounds you will be underweight.

for someone 5'4" with a small frame (i.e. low end of charts) healthy weight range is 114-127.

....I think the issue is that you're calling your boyfriend a "fatty" and not being supportive of HIM.

I don't know your frame, or what your body looks like, but you're taller than me and I know that at 97 I'd be in pretty bad shape. I'd be killing myself to get to 115, actually.

I honestly think you should go to a doctor and ask their opinion before you continue going deeper into the underweight zone...your body image and goals are your own business, but I can't imagine the weight you're at is good for your body or your health.

Overweight and underweight people have serious risks for heart problems. My dear, you are underweight and I'm concerned about you restricting your eating and increasing exercise, or starting on ANY kind of program. Please see a doctor!

i have i do have a small frame and i have zero boobs so the weight that you have for that i dont , with going over my weight and my my frame my figure im best between 97 and 101 , and that where i want to be then, kourtney kardashian is like a inch or two shorter and has huge fake boobs and is 95lbs and still has a lot of meat on her bones that looks good i dont think you guys realize the many different body types and weight ... i do... ill be happy just to lose ten pounds but my figure id still look chunky and i dont call my boyfriend fatty he eats fatty foods so ie fatty and **** i did too until today so yeah..and i mean i dont think 97 is really my goal weight more like a number im thinking would work for my body i feel that with every pound loss once i can look in the mirror and be happy ill work to keep looking like that not losing weight i want to shed the pounds and then build lean muscle and i have it all worked out everyones weight loss is different as is everyones body

I really don't think anybody meant to offend you...I certainly didn't.

And I wasn't trying at all to discourage you from eating healthy or trying to get fit.

Like I said, I don't know what you look like or what your body type is.

I just think it would be a good idea to consult with a doctor if you're planning on going lower in the underweight range. Its not about whether or not you have body fat, its that being underweight has health risks and can be hard on your heart. The lower you go, same as the higher in weight people go, the more risk you're at for lots of problems including heart attack. Its never a bad idea to get your health checked out before pushing your body to do something.

And I think that the people on this site DO have a full realization of the different body types and weight. Perhaps more than the average person, even.

It's not your job to judge your boyfriend. You need to either accept him as he is, or let him go so he can find someone who does accept him. You can ask him to join you for activities that are healthy, and you can make an effort to cook healthy meals and only cook enough that each of you have a healthy portion, but you cannot make him do anything and you should not try. You definitely shouldn't make negative comments about his weight or appearance.

Just wanted to interject. Kourtney Kardashian is 5'0", thats /four/ inches shorter; so she is a HEAD shorter than you. Kim Kardashian is 5'3"-5'2", she's the one that is an inch shorter and her weight is 120-125 lbs (117 if you believe the tabloids.)

You should check out mybodygallery.com. It reassured me of my goal weight. I think you should browse it a bit? Explore different body types at various weights.

Personally, I think you most likely look fine at the weight range at which you're in. I think you should TONE your body, you'll see things tighten up in no time! Eat healthy, don't starve yourself. From what it sounds like, you care about image but since you're already at your healthy weight, I really suggest working on your muscles. TONING BANDS do wonders in just a few days! Just so you know, muscle burns more calories than fat. Naturally, a person with more muscle mass burns more calories than a fatter person even if they were both sitting down doing nothing. Double win, right!? Get toned AND burn more. Remember not to restrict your diet. VITAMINS, AND ANTIOXIDANTS ARE CRUCIAL FOR YOUR BODY TO LOOK AND FEEL ITS BEST. You'll have a bright glow, healthy skin, and fight wrinkles too, along with many other internal health perks for a healthy life.

As far as encouraging your partner..love him for who he is. Ask yourself why you want him to shed some lbs or get healthy. Ultimately, you should be concerned about his choices for his health but the choices are, in the end, his.

Luna- that website is awesome!