I am frustrated. I live in a house with people who insist on having ice cream, tortilla chips, apple pie, oreos, and cake around the house. They don't struggle with their weight but I do.
Is there anybody that can help explain to my family that having junk food around the house can be a huge obstacle to weight loss? If so, thank you!
I ONLY pack on the pounds when I have lived in a household with high carb, high sugar foods..... my weakness. When I didn't allow binge foods in my kitchen, I was able to maintain and lose weight. For years, I was never more than 20 pounds overweight. Now...... my weight has climbed, I have 90 pounds to lose. I'm 5'6" and 230 pounds.
My doctor says "Explain how hard it is for you. Your family will want to support you and get rid of the junk food." I have tried many times. They don't get it. My family members are good people and supportive in many ways. But in this ONE area, .....they .... just.... don't .... understand!
I am told "You must work on your self discipline, that is what its ALL about." or "You must not really want to lose weight." or "I can handle being surrounded by all this food, why can't you?"
I can work my butt off and be highly successful on diets... up to a point. I track my food. I stay in my diet calorie range for many days in a row. I walk briskly on the treadmill for 4 to 5 hours a week. I feel proud strong and hopeful. Then...... I blow it, once, maybe twice a week. I'll eat a bunch of oreos and I don't lose weight. Of course, I realize I AM the one stuffing the oreos in my mouth!!! But its darn hard eating healthy soups, salads, chicken breasts, and cottage cheese when I know the pantry is filled with fattening goodies.
This diet... fail... diet... fail... cycle has happened many times. Debilitating and frustrating. Frankly, I've given up and I feel awful about myself. I haven't even tried to seriously diet for 6 months.
I'm trying to convince them to put a combination lock or lock with a key on a cabinet door and throw all their goodies inside. But, they say it is too much of a hassle.
Thank you for reading my l o n g post! :-)
***Any suggestions? Agree? Disagree? All opinions welcome! Thank you!***
They have a right to have the food they want. You have already been given some good advice. You must really want to lose.True. Self discipline. True. It is up to you. It is not the resposnsibility of family members to do it for you. It would be nice if they would but it is unreasonable to expect them to change their ways so it will be easier for you to diet.
I agree with bargoo. See it as a challenge! The real world will always have temptations for you. You need to learn to handle them. The sooner, the better. Losing weight is not easy and it will never be.
There are temptations everywhere. Some are harder than others, but since you really want to do this, you can and you WILL!
#1, stay out of the kitchen if you're not planning to eat.
#2, I drink hot tea, chew gum, or pop a mint when I'm feeling like I want to munch and it's not on my plan.
#3, if the cravings are really strong, go for a walk or go to a clothing store and try clothes on.
Another thing is maybe you want to find different foods to eat that you find more delicious than what you have now. I'm not sure what kind of plan you're on, but if you have particular items you like, find ways to make them in a way that satisfies your taste buds and your waistline.
I agree with the OP, to a point. Eating all that crap is not good for her family either, whatever their personal lack of weight struggles may be. It is just plain unhealthy. So, Holly, I recommend you try to cajole your family into healthier fattening foods, such as organic pie, gluten free or low-carb cookies, raisin-walnut fiber muffins, BAKED potato chips, etc.
-- Not so much for your family's weight, as for their health. Because a healthy eating lifestyle is not just for people who struggle with their weight. It's better for everyone, and removes support from the big corporations who poison us with their additive-laden, artificially flavored, worthless, empty calorie junk food.
Maybe if you frame it as a health issue for everyone in the house, and less of a weight-control issue for yourself. Have them watch movies such as Food,Inc. and Earthlings; maybe they will make healthier choices for themselves once they are enlightened about the junk they are stuffing into their bodies.
Maybe you could bake some healthier versions of the crap they are eating. Ask a family member to bake with you so they can a) learn how to cook/bake healthy snacks, and b) help you stay accountable so you don't eat them all as soon as they come out of the oven.
That's what I would do. JMHO
Last edited by shr1nk1ngme; 10-21-2011 at 12:29 PM.
Reason: spelling... DOH!
Can you segregate the kitchen into healthy/unhealthy areas? It's relatively easy to do with pantry areas. You can have one cabinet that is junk-free. I know it's harder with the fridge/freezer (from personal experience). But can you have one shelf or section of shelf that is junk-free? Then you have to get in the mindset that the other stuff is off-limits for you. Either it "belongs" to someone else, or better yet, try to reach the point where you don't even think of it as food, just some artificial substance.
It's great if you can get family members to join you, but you can't expect that they will. I have a very supportive husband, and he is losing weight too, but even he eats things that I can't. And we have a very active teenage daughter and I really do not expect her to limit herself to the healthy meals that we cook for her (she has ice cream and some treats in the house).
As someone who lived with 3 other kids in the house almost teens and a single mother who has a sweet tooth and myself being the only one overweight... everyones right they dont have to diet with you! sucks yes it does i know ive been there... my suggestions have one cupboard cleaned out for yourself and maybe a section in the fridge just for your food!
if its a matter of self control and you just cant help yourself everytime you see it right in front of you thats only something you can fix not them... whether the food is there or not your going to find it. you need to work on self control. Theres always going to be that stuff everywhere right.... when you go to a restaurant are you going to ask the people at the table beside you to order something else cause it looks to good and you cant have it? no obvs not lmao....
Just work on self control ... and get your own space! good luck!!!
As soon as a new package of snacks enters the house, dump them down the toilet when no one is looking.
But place the wrappers in a waste basket in your room.
They will figure you ate them all. Don't tell them where their treats went, even if they yell at you.
Then they will start hiding the treats from you.
Optimism is inevitably the last hope of the defeated.
~ Albert Meltzer ~
I agree with the OP, to a point. Eating all that crap is not good for her family either, whatever their personal lack of weight struggles may be. It is just plain unhealthy. So, Holly, I recommend you try to cajole your family into healthier fattening foods, such as organic pie, gluten free or low-carb cookies, raisin-walnut fiber muffins, BAKED potato chips, etc.
-- Not so much for your family's weight, as for their health. Because a healthy eating lifestyle is not just for people who struggle with their weight. It's better for everyone, and removes support from the big corporations who poison us with their additive-laden, artificially flavored, worthless, empty calorie junk food.
On a related note, instead of thinking about what you're doing as dieting, which many people (maybe not you) think of as being temporary and painfully self-denying until their goal is reached and they can eat "normally" again, would it help you to think about the evolution of your eating habits as part of a permanent, healthy lifestyle change? There are a huge number of foods that can be incorporated into a healthy, varied, balanced diet. If you're bored with what you've been eating, go look for new foods and new (healthy) recipes to try. And unless they're really a trigger food for you, eating a single serving of Oreos that fits into your calorie plan or whatever ('cause you are using some method of tracking how much you're eating, right?) once or twice a week isn't going to hurt you.
I think finding one's personal balance is key. Self-deprivation (and self-discipline, for that matter) are overrated. It might be best if you completely avoided all the junk that your family keeps in the house, but even if you can't do that right now, you can still figure out how to minimize the impact of those foods by keeping yourself to portions that won't blow your calorie count for the day, giving yourself options that are healthier or lower in calories (healthy homemade goodies or those 100-cal. pack type snacks), and reminding yourself when you feel tempted to indulge that you do have a choice in what to do. Choosing not to eat the Oreo does take some self-discipline, but you only need it until you've made your decision and move on to something more productive.
Although it sounds like your family isn't the most supportive or understanding, it's not really fair to try to force them into changes they're not ready to make. Stay focused on your choices and your solutions to the problems you encounter while trying to lose weight - it'll probably be more productive for you.
I disagree that it's necessarily "bad" for her family to eat those foods. If they are all at healthy weights, it's more likely that they deal with those foods in a moderate, healthy way. Just as people who don't struggle with their weight can't understand how hard it is, people who have always struggled don't understand that some people are naturally thin because they naturally have good, moderate habits. There's nothing wrong with that, that's how it should be!
OP, we live in the world. It's wonderful when we can arrange our world to reflect our goals, but it's not always possible. It would be lovely if your family would support your efforts by keeping out the foods you have problems with, but it's unfair to expect them to. They don't have the same struggles, they can eat these foods in moderation.
Are there other snack foods you can keep in your own space? So you don't go into the kitchen looking for grapes and find yourself eating ice cream? Maybe you could get a small fridge and a shelf to keep healthy choices for yourself so you don't spend as much time in the kitchen.
OP, I totally support you in your efforts, but the answer is not changing how everyone in your family eats and making them give up things you have a problem with. It's learning to manage your exposure. I think you kind of have to admit to yourself that this is your issue and then you need to brainstorm some ways around it. You can do it!
(it's weird writing that. I'm another holly, and it feels as if I'm writing a letter to myself). It sounds like you are a really tough situation, and I empathize completely. I'm also part of an naturally slender family, who while being very loving and supporting don't actually understand what it's like to constantly monitor what you eat. Im a diabetic, and so when living at home when I was growing up was stressful.
What worked in my situation was picking a couple if foods which I found were my weaknesses. For example, I loved icy poles (which are full of pure sugar, as all you fellow carb counters would know). I then asked my family if they could maybe restrict THOSE FEW FOODS. this way, they weren't changing their diet or lifestyle, but it made a huge impact on me. Plus, it's just a little change too, so it helps them feel as if they are actively helping you with your weight loss, positivively reinforcing the message.
I'm going to disagree with martini on this one. Moving out is a huge change, and the transitional period may make you more stressed out and prone to overeating. Plus, you mentioned that your family is generally loving and supportive, but has just a couple of issues. Moving out over something like the food in the house may be taken as a deeper insult to them, and you may loose their support in other areas.
.... dump them down the toilet when no one is looking. But place the wrappers in a waste basket in your room....
Maybe the trash can and not the toilet..I have visions of having to call the plumber and having to explain why there are 2 pounds of oreos and a bag of chips in the pipes plugging up the toilet.
Unfortunately life is not fair. It sucks living with people who don't have to watch their weight. It sucks that they can eat whatever they want and all you have to do is smell it and you gain weight. It sucks that they won't help you in your endeavors to be healthy.
So, how to deal with all this suckage? Take a deep breath and figure out how you are going to do this. It's going to be you figureing out how to make weight loss work for you in the environment you are in now.
In the long run, I imagine that being exposed to all the junk on your weight loss journey will make you stronger in the long run once you do figure it out. Which I know is not really helpful right at this moment.
I can work my butt off and be highly successful on diets... up to a point. I track my food. I stay in my diet calorie range for many days in a row. I walk briskly on the treadmill for 4 to 5 hours a week. I feel proud strong and hopeful. Then...... I blow it, once, maybe twice a week. I'll eat a bunch of oreos and I don't lose weight. Of course, I realize I AM the one stuffing the oreos in my mouth!!! But its darn hard eating healthy soups, salads, chicken breasts, and cottage cheese when I know the pantry is filled with fattening goodies.
I am also a calorie counter and this what I have found helps (because I'm in a similar situation).
Decide in the morning what treat you are craving. Look at the calorie/serving of that treat, whether chips or oreos, etc. I then work that into my calorie allotment for the day so you know that when you are really tempted you are able to have a couple oreos or a handful of chips. I try to keep the treat under 150, sometimes, I'll go higher if at the end of the day I still have some spare calories. That helps me stay on track during the day because I know I have that to look forward to in the evening.
Also, change up your meals. Diet fatigue can really drag you down if you're eating the same thing over and over again.
Family Won't get rid of junk food!!!
It sucks living with people who don't have to watch their weight. It sucks that they can eat whatever they want and all you have to do is smell it and you gain weight. It sucks that they won't help you in your endeavors to be healthy. 
