hi everyone. been a while. had visitors and been trying to be "normal." my sister left today and my mom's cat, who we took in after she passed is very sick. feeling pretty awful today and wanting to binge really badly. trying to remember that today is day 56....8 weeks without a binge. as i am still trying to gain weight, the binge monster is trying to justify a binge as being not that bad. it doesn't help that eating a bit off my normal clean foods the last few days has left me feeling bloated and retaining water....my mental state just isn't that great. i have a feeling i'll still make it through today, but it just sucks to feel like this...
tyla- Thanks, I do feel much better. Congrats on 3 weeks!! Yay!
Day 7- Had some sugar free ice cream, noticed it isn't addicting like the stuff filled w/ sugar. I'm choosing sugar free from now on, I definitely won't binge on it. All in all it was a good day!
I'm so glad to say that my stress level has gone up now that I've started school and I have not gone off the deep end with my eating. Yes, I have eaten things I shouldn't have but NO, I have not even come close to binging.
May I join you? I've been looking for a thread that would address my "issues"...and this one seems just right.
As an introduction, I am re-losing for the umpteenth time, the same weight that I've been losing since my 20's (I am in my mid 50s). Whenever I've lost a substantial amount of wt., it was by starving myself. As a former athlete who could pretty much eat whatever she wished until about the age of 14, my eating habits have been horrendous and "THE BINGE" has been my downfall and the start of every minor and eventually major wt. gain. In 2004 I decided that I had enough and lost a considerable amt. of wt., reached my goal of 130#, proceeded to take care of the ravages with two cosmetic surgery interventions and spent the following two years regaining about 90% of the lost wt. Since then I've been fluctuating by about 30#s at a time.
Despite my disastrous history with eating and wt. issues, my health has always been excellent despite a problematic family history. As of about 2 years ago, my cholesterol and BP are catching up to my habits and genetic history. I am currently taking cholesterol lowering medication and see my MD quarterly for the script. Before seeing her I panic. EVERY TIME!
Recently I saw the CNN special (by Dr. Gupta) and I had an epiphany: not only do I need to lose the wt. but I can no longer eat the foods that I love the most (re. the ones to which I am addicted, such as sugar, saturated fats...you know the lot).
Now I am in a situation in which I need to change everything at the same time: lower calories, healthy choices (which are completely unappealing to me), reduce the incidents of overeating and no longer binge at all! I have no clue how to accomplish all those things at once, so momentarily I am concentrating on food selection and keeping my calories at a level that will probably limit my wt. loss to one or two pounds a month. Once I experience some success with that, I will limit my calories.
Thank you for providing a forum to share my story and congratulations on your successes. I will definitely use you as role models.
Oh, I forgot something. I know we all have our own definition of what constitutes a binge. I consider mine to be an incident (which may stretch into days, weeks, etc.), during which I feel out of control and it is in no way eating that I do in response to being hungry.
Based on that definition, I have not had a binge in 6 days.
