Stuck in emotional eating mode
 

Hello there!! Hoping to find some wise folk...

My weight goes up and down within about 3 stone. Almost always linked to work stress and relationship issues.

Thing is, I get big and I sense 'the time has come' for about 2 weeks I eat like a moron then BAM! I'm in sensible mode, the weight comes off, everything's luvverly.

But I went in to over-eating phase at Christmas and er... it's not yet passed. I'm pretty constant with my weight but I've a couple of social occasions coming up and I'm getting grumpy and angry. I'm having less sex, getting undressed as little as possible, yet still taking out my emotions by punishing my body with food.

I know it's because work is more stressful than ever and I'm doing 50-70 hours a week, and my boyfriend might have to move away to find work, but these aren't reasons, they're excuses.

I really do need to kick my own arse (not difficult right now - big target). I'm being my own worst enemy. Does anyone have any tips for stopping the circle of self-loathing and procrastination??!

Thanks in advance for anything :)

Welcome to 3FC =)

Emotional eating can be tough to change, but not impossible. It's a learned behavior that's unfortunately reinforced naturally by the good taste of food, etc.

First on your list, may be learning a new way to deal with your stresses. Coming up with a list of things that can also calm you or give you some peace while you're frustrated or annoyed or just going crazy because of how much you need to do.

Some of those things might mean planning. For example, saying to yourself that no matter WHAT kind of a day you have, you will be taking 15 minutes completely for yourself and having a good soak in the tub while music plays or 30 minutes at the end of the day to get another chapter read in that book you like.

To move away from emotional eating you might have to strongarm yourself just a bit in the beginning by questioning why you're going to food each and every time you get a meal together.

HALT is an expression you might've heard before.

Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired

Basically, it's a quick phrase that you can say to yourself before you chose any food.

HALT - Am I really hungry? Yes = Okay, have a healthy meal. No = what emotion am I feeling (and stress can be included) and what's a better way of dealing?

Or as I always read it "HALT - Am I Hungry? Or should I find an ALTernative?"

Tackle your emotional eating, by beginning to only eat when you have the physical symptoms of hunger and then as time goes on you can build up and make even healthier steps. :)

Best of wishes!

I go through phases like this, too. What has helped me recently is to break it down into smaller tasks, instead of just get 'back on track.'
I started with something easy, like 'drink 2 bottles of water today.' I still tried to diet (or at least not binge), drink tons of water, get some activity in, etc. But if that didn't pan out each day, I still made an effort to have the 2 bottles of water.

Then I added 'eat some vegetables at each meal/snack/whatever.' I was still having good and bad streaks, but the bad streaks were getting shorter. Being able to meet a small goal, even if my main goal of not binging wasn't met all the time, helped me to feel like I had some control.
I'm still adding in other goals, like get 10 minutes of exercise, which later became 20, then 30. Or eating some protein with each meal.

This was honestly hard for me to do at first, because I had a specific diet plan in mind that I've been able to stick with in the past for long stretches of time, so I really felt like I would eventually just snap out of binge mode and get back on track. I'm kind of an all or nothing sort of person. :^: But being able to see myself as successful despite the emotional eating has really, really helped. I feel kinda silly, because I know 'make small changes' is nothing new or revolutionary in terms of dieting advice. I just didn't think about it in terms of binge eating, I guess.

Lovely was good to mention HALT. It's what they use in AA or OA, and refers to some of the things that make you try to self medicate (with alcohol, if you're an alcoholic, drugs, or food if you're an overeater).

One of the things that I've learned is that dieting can actually be more medicinal than food. I also eat to control my emotions and stress, but I find that committing myself to a diet works in the same way, if not better, to lift my mood and decrease my stress as eating did. It always gives me a little boost to see that I ate well that day, or lost some weight, or exercised. In the long term, it's actually much more effective than food in stabilizing my mood or stress levels, because it creates pride rather than shame and self-loathing.

This is great advice. I'm kind of stuck in a similar rut of "comfort eating" and focusing on doing one healthy, good-for-me thing a day (rather than thinking that I have to fix the whole problem all at once) seems to be working. Granted, I'm only one day in, but still... Gots to hang on to that hope.

Lovely: That is fabulous advice. I really like your version of HALT!

Kelly: Also great advice

Thanks!