I realized I might be a binger
 

My post is more of a "come clean" moment than an actual question but I would still love to hear from other bingers on the topic ;)

I kind of had a "light bulb" moment tonight while reading through the "chicks in control" section. I never thought of myself as a binger, just a person who was overweight since childhood and who became obese through poor food choices. I always assumed that I had a slow metabolism or something because I didn't really eat a lot more than the average person during the day except for.... evenings :^: I have always considered myself a real snacker when it comes to bedtime. Looking back, I realize this is more of a problem then the average case of the munchies. Until recently, I would sit down at night with a huge assortment of foods and eat until I felt so full and sick. I knew I was full but it tasted so good and I could just not stop. Usually my foods consisted of any leftovers from the day, always at least half a large bag of chips, cheese and other snacks all combined into a large meal. I would intentionally buy too much takeout for dinner when we ordered so I would have extras and I would actually feel excited that I had that food to eat later. Even as a child, I would hide large bags of chip in my bedroom and usually eat the entire bag. I remember vomiting after eating a large bag of corn tortilla chips and I wouldn't eat them again for years after that.

I tend to get defensive about my food and feel frustrated when my husband eats something that I was saving or something I bought for myself. I try not to say anything because he needs to eat too but I feel angry, then guilty for feeling that way. Even now, since I have started my healthy lifestyle, I save the majority of my calories for the evening. I have found myself eating very little throughout the day so I could sit down to an entire bag of microwave popcorn, cheese and fruit. Granted, these are way better choices than what I used to eat and I usually manage to stay close to my calories but not always, yet the behavior is still there and its an issue.
Do I sound like a binger, or just someone who enjoys snacking? I am having real issues with limiting my night time foods but I am still losing weight so I figured I could work around it but sometimes I am not so sure.
Thanks so much for your feedback :^:

It does sound like you have some traits of a person who binges. You sound alot like me, I also eat til I'm sick and I'm never hungry when I start binging, I just get fuller and fuller, It just tastes too good to stop. I don't binge at night though, cause that does more damage as far as weight gain goes. I'm a daytime binger, either after I eat breakfast or lunch. You should try to eat a healthy breakfast and lunch. Maybe you wouldn't crave the foods you eat at night so much. Hope this helps

The way I've heard and read this is that people can gorge themselvews on food but did so in the ancient past because they never knew when they would get more food. The gorging mechanism is still there. The only way to logically stop it is to ration the food you eat. Don't buy cheese, popcorn, chips, candy, anything has a flavor that will trigger binging. I like to eat totally bland yukky food because I hate it and can't eat much of it.

Try this, get some stuff used for toothaches, and put a tiny amount on your tongue. Nothing will taste good then. This will exhaust and deaden your tastebuds and make everything taste horrible.

sweetnlow - i'm a compulsive/emotional/binge-eater and many of the food behaviors you mentioned are what I do/do have done.

there are definitely some binge-eating disorder red flags in the episodes you describe: esp. eating until you're uncomfotably full or sick and stashing food to eat in secret.

is your evening eating the sole outlet you have for de-stressing, relaxing or comforting yourself at the end of the day? perhaps that's why it's so important to you to structure your day's worth of food in that manner.

Thanks for your replies :) Yes, evenings are my time to unwind and relax. I think the eating has become so routine that when I try to limit myself to a small snack, I become restless and can't sleep. Since I started my weight loss journey, I have forced myself to eat breakfast lunch, small snack and dinner on schedule every day. The thought of food before 10 am used to make me feel ill but I am getting better about it. I usually try to eat light until dinner when I start to increase my intake a bit.
I might try changing my evening food to veggies and a bit of low fat dip. That way I can't do as much damage if I go on a binge.
I have already started making some changes by choosing healthier foods, taking all the snacks from my bedroom and making a serving of my food that I eat it in my bedroom so I am away from the kitchen. Most nights I can resist venturing back down stairs for more food. The problem is that I have a hard time limiting myself when I make my snack to take up. If I leave the kitchen with not enough food to keep me snacking for an hour, I feel very panicked and uneasy. Any suggestions how I can change this behavior? I think it's gone past the point of just "suck it up" and eat something small. I know everyone here can relate in some ways.

[QUOTE=sweetnlow28;3200337]If I leave the kitchen with not enough food to keep me snacking for an hour, I feel very panicked and uneasy. Any suggestions how I can change this behavior? /QUOTE]

It does sound like there are underlying anxiety issues or even PTSD issues from past trauma, maybe. I would suggest that you try a support group like Overeaters Anonymous or maybe a professional counselor to discuss what's going on. Other than that, I'm not the pro on these issues as I can relate so I'll let others give you pointers on behavior modification ideas. Good luck! :hug: