Argh! I'm so frustrated guys!
I'm writing after a really bad unplanned binge and my stomach hurts so bad (I ate too fast and ate too much). I had made it through 4 days without bingeing (which was amazing for me!). I had even been eating a proper amount of food and not trying to survive on some ridiculous crash diet plan. I have a long history of over-eating (or not eating) depending on my emotional state and I just gave in to the craving to overdo it as i had an emotionally exhausting day.
Of course, I'm now thinking 'Ah well, you've totally screwed it up now as per usual, you might as well just eat what you want seeing as you have started'. I know I need to wakeup tomorrow and continue as I was but my eating disorder history means I have a tendency to try cut back food to make up for by bingeing.
How do I make myself do this?? my usual routine would be to wake up bingeing as I started it tonight or else wake with the goal of eating as little as possible (which as we all know inevitably leads to bingeing). I hate my all or nothing view.
Also If I continue with the healthy eating how quick will I return to my normal weight before the binge (I ate well over 5000 calories). Is it a matter of days?
I think I just need a great kick up the bum and for you guys to assure me it is ok to continue with my healthy eating plan without feeling guilty for a binge.