shatteredfallendove, i would suggest you don't do it on you own. I went anorexic during junior high and high school (didn't go to eat in the cafeteria but didn't eat anything else either and my junior high had enough stairs to keep me on a constant workout) until i started having nausea from one bite of toast. i was in denial as well so i just told myself i would get over it on my own,after all, all i needed to do was eat right? I started eating and eating and by third year of college i was overweight. not by much but since i only worked on the eating factor and not the triggers it looked a lot worse. so i started dieting. it was healthy at first but slowly i keep falling off both wagons (healthy diet and no ed). I am still ashamed of it and even if i am seeing a therapist i can't bring myself to talking of it fully. I suggest you get some kind of support. either family, friends or therapist but some kind of support to help with the mental and emotional aspects. had i known better i would have tried that and maybe it would be easier. i am still trying and getting some talks with the therapist. but still, all those things are in the mind. i hope you are doing better and i hope that this part of your life is over and you embrace the beauty that is in all. best of luck to you and positive thought to you.