I lost control-again.
 

I had to go to a family lunch, and it just went downhill from there.
I have eaten about 8,000 calories today, and I just hate myself for it. I reached a new low weight today (the lowest weight I have been at since 2006)
and I just had to binge. I just couldn't stop myself.
And right now it is all I can do not to go clean out the freezer.
But I came here instead, so I think thats progress.
My tummy hurts so bad though. I don't know why I do this to myself. I'd been feeling so good, so "in control" lately, I felt so gorgeous this morning, and I just lost it.

*Sorry to be so whiny- I just feel like crap.

Try to focus on how bad you feel right now. Remember that feeling!!!


Now put it out of your mind and focus on how you are going to get on the wagon tomorrow. Plan plan plan for tomorrow and for the week. One bad day will not put all the weight back on.

I have had those kind of days too, and I know how it feels. Don't be too hard on yourself, just get right back on to your eating plan tomorrow.

By tomorrow you'll be empty again and ready to get back on plan. Don't beat yourself up, one day of binging is not such a big deal, just use it as a lesson learned... it didn't make you feel happy. Being in control makes you happy and so from this moment you're taking back control.

thanks mimzy

self-sabotage is one of those things we really have to fight and get over. I have done it too, especially in the "old" pre 3fc days, I would see a small loss of the scale and think automatically, "oh good, now I can over eat, have a treat, cheat." and I would, a good overstuffing binge. ack.
Right now, the thought of that is repugnant, but I HAVE been there.
You can stop now, and get back on. It wont be impossible to control this now.
YOU can do it

Hey, I think most of us here can identify with what you did. You can do this--you have already proven that. Just dust yourself off and jump back on the horse.

I'm so sorry to hear about your struggle, but this makes me feel better that I'm not the only one whose done this. We are all human and we all make mistakes. I really can't offer any more advice than anybody else on this page. Just keep up the good work and don't let it ruin your whole day.

We wouldn't be reading these if we couldn't identify. I feel your pain... when you can write about it or talk about it though, it helps. I think the answer is don't let two months go by before you are in control again. Let it be tomorrow and then next time let it be in a few hours..etc. Now.. how about I take my own advice!

Oh goodness. I know how you feel. :[
Sometimes I go to debate tournaments, and there is nothing but junkfood around. So I pretty much rack up a ton of empty calories.
But whats important to remember is that you can't just give up.
Even if you've had a horrible day, make things better by eating an apple if your hungry.
And remember tomorrow that you can start over. :]

Been there done that many of times....

Just wanted to give you a hug dear. :hug:

I completely feel your pain.I wish I could give you advice.Actually I find myself reading these posts and see others winning the battle and wonder what the answer is???I would give anything at this point to find out.I can do well for days and then blow it....completely blow it.Funny thing is, I have many friends that have the same problem.Most of them in the same profession as me.I have always believed I have an addictive personality.Is there a cure????????????

ibleedlipstick, I worry about that too. I often feel the need to "let loose" after I've reached a new low weight and with my history of binge eating, I think it's quite possible I could just fall right back into my old bad habits. It's a strange self-sabotage and I think indicative that these bad eating patterns will never go away, we just need to do what we can to prevent them and to move on when they do happen.

Everyone else's advice is right.. look forward and move on.

I can't help but be concerned about your goal weight, however. 5'8 and 110 lbs is a BMI of 16.7... that's in the underweight and unhealthy range. Even 120 lbs is too low. I hope you reconsider your goal weight... unhealthy dieting can often create reactionary binges. You don't want an eating disorder... they're horrible.

:hug: I'm sorry.
I did the same thing last night. I'd been eating crap all weekend because I'd been with my boyfriend and I came home yesterday to a big family meal for my grandpa's birthday and from there i just ateateate.
And today I started off healthy but right now I want to run downstairs to the kitchen and eat cake and cheese. I feel like I'm pushing with all my might against a brick wall, and its so tempting to just fall back and lay down in the comfort of where I've always been but I know there's another world on the other side of that brick wall so I'm going to keep pushing even though it feels like the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I'll move it, one way or another.
Sorry about the flowery metaphor but I absolutely know what you're up against and I hope things get better, for the both of us.

I like cake and cheese. I so know how you feel. Felt the same way on Saturday big time. Good thing to come here instead. Good job for that. Try and stay strong

What kind of feelings do you have just before the binge?

I find that sometimes - I have to tell myself - Ok If I wait 15 minutes and think about this, will I still have it 15 minutes later? Most of the time I find out that i'm not really hungry..

Yes, I do find that putting off bad food makes a big difference. If I am strong enough to say, later, not now, I can usually avert the whole binge. It is having the strength to say no in the first place. I have it more often than I used to, but not often enuf yet.
here's hoping we get stronger!

i totally know where you are coming from - and i hope you don't beat yourself up too much. Put the effort you put into self-loathing into doing something positive (like planning what you are going to do for the rest of the week and avoid another binge).
for some reason, when i finally would see a little bit of weight lost, i owuld do the same thing - i'd almost try to sabotage myself because i guess mentally i wasn't ready before to actually lose the weight. As a result, I pretty much stopped weighing myself because the numbers drove me crazy. i weigh myself maybe once a month now?
when you feel like you're going to binge... honestly i dont have any advice because i struggle with it, too. just being on plan for a while helps you to barrel through the times when you don't feel as strong because you get used to healthier habits. when you are on for a few days, then way off on another, the back on... the roller coaster is hard to deal with. you just have to try to put your foot down once and for all.
best of luck to you.

I've been a "secret binger" for years, and absolutely I have been where you are, uncountable times. And I think the collective wisdom you see in these posts is proof that NOBODY has had the perfect journey. Take a deep breath, look back at how far you've already come, and go back to those plans that have made you successful. The dirty little secret that I can add is that when you have been eating rationally and correctly for a long period of time, and you lose it totally and overeat ... your metabolism will tend to shift into overdrive (did you notice if your heart was pounding? It's not just the stress of pigging out!) The body is a wonderful creation, and it will forgive a rare, occasional lapse. Hang in there!

Someone on 3FC posted this and it really helped me understand my body and why I just want to eat after the weight I lost. It may be helpful!
http://articles.latimes.com/2008/jun...lth/he-regain2

I ate a box of Girl Scout cookies. The whole box of Thin Mints. What's crazy is that I added up the calories as I was eating them (160cal/serving * 8 servings = 1,280 calories). I decided it was worth it and will simply move on tomorrow.

I have been on plan for 5 weeks and figure my body needed the snack. I think the key is to move forward and not dwell on it.

rachinma-Eating the cookies sounds like a mindful binge.You actually looked at calories and decided to eat them.This would be major progress for me.When I binge I have no idea what damage I am doing at the time.Good for you.