[baristamon]

Every time I think about this statement, I wonder what kind of an idiot would be embarassed to have their weight loss acknowledged. Then I remember that its me! I work at a coffee shop, and have a lot of regular customers who think its cool to say "hey, you've lost a ton of weight!" instead of feeling good, i feel awful. embarassed. i want to avoid the conversation, the person, the questions (did you do it on purpose? what's your secret?) The UPS delivery guy said something today. I was mortified. When a close friend says something, after an hour or so of spending time together, I feel good, like my friend has validated and empowered me to continue to do well. When a stranger says something, I want to binge my face off until i get fat again, will they say something then? "hey, noticed you gained 30 lbs. what's your secret?" I hate when they want to know exactly how much I've lost. Or when the same person makes the same comment every day. I actually saw a regular that I haven't seen since I've lost the weight, and while we were talking, he asked me about my family, I about his, he gave me a quick up and down, and without saying more, continued talking about whatever we were saying. I was incredibly relieved that he didn't comment about the weight loss, even though it was acknowledged.

I am still 20 or 30 pounds overweight. I have lost about 40 pounds since May, bringing me to my pre-pregnancy weight, where I have stalled for the last month or so.

I don't know why I feel this way. I should be proud of my accomplishment. I still have a long way to go, and i need the encouragement, so why do I loathe it?

[skinnymel]

I totally feel the same way when someone notices I've lost weight. And when I gained some weight back I feel self conscious about that, too, like they are sizing me up again. For some reason people think we need to hear "Woah, good job, keep up the good work!" like we need this validation to keep going. My favorite is... "You're getting too skinny." Wait until that happens! That'll send you into binge-mode faster than you can say "binge." That's why my weight is up again. I can't handle being constantly looked at as just a body who has lost weight. We must have all the answers, we must be a different person, too! I'm still the same person with the same feelings of 200+ lbs me was, but without the protective padding. We hold on to our padding and binge to keep it on when we start getting noticed. I kind of like being overlooked now that I'm not "so skinny" anymore. I'd rather be passed up than sized up by others. It's almost as if people can see through you. Ugh, people just don't understand what all we go through with our bodies, do they?! My advice: don't lose heart and stick with what has been working for you. Comments are just that, comments... those people are probably jealous, or think you're really hot now.... which I'm sure you are. It can feel like you are getting oggled more from men, which I find disgusting. Luckily I'm with a guy that I was with when I was heavy... I would hate to find a guy now who wouldn't have given me the time of day when I was fat. So superficial! Sorry about this rant. I just wanted you to know that your insecurities are felt by many!

[Athendta]

I like it when people, even strangers, notice I've lost weight. Sometimes they notice me hitching up my pants a lot, and figure it out that way.

But I can understand why you might be embarrassed. Noticing that you've lost weight means they noticed you were fat before.

But look on the bright side. I've had people think I was pregnant, and congratulate me on that, and ask how far along I was! Nope, sorry, I'm just fat.

[baristamon]

Oh, I've had the too skinny comment - as if! I'm sorry, but this bowl of jelly around my belly is NOT an indicator of too much anything, except fat! People should really think before they say something like that, cause then i feel like I have to tell them, "no, I'm still fat..." I am also lucky that my boyfriend loves me no matter how big or small I am.

[baristamon]

I had a customer ask me how far along I was. I looked at him and said "oh, about 2 years ago." boy, was he embarrassed. Of course, I did the same thing to a lady, by asking if she was ever going to have her baby. her response? "i did, about a year ago" oops! open mouth, insert foot.