I've binged as long as I can remember, my dad was an alcoholic and I turned to food to deal with the emotions and it just became a way of life. After my parents divorced when I was 14, my mom was working a lot, so I was home alone to binge most of the time and didn't have to worry about hiding it.
I have thought about it and come up with a binge that I'm really ashamed of: I was around 15 and my mom was in the hospital; she had surgery to remove scar tissue but was bleeding internally and they weren't sure she was going to make it. She survived, but at the time, I was obviously scared, stressed, and depressed, so I took around $20 to a vending machine and spent it on candy bars, snack cakes, and brownies. I stashed it all my purse and went to the restroom where I sat in a stall and ate every last bit.
I've done the lie of "there's really someone else I'm ordering for too" as well. I used to buy double Value Meals from McDonalds all the time and eat them. I also used to eat entire pizzas in one or two sittings within the same day.
I have problems keeping any kind of snack food or sweet in the house. If I know it's there and I'm at home, by the end of the night the entire box will be gone. When I get anxious and I'm at home, I'll do what I call a walkaround - I'll sit and do something then get up and eat something in the kitchen and keep doing it until I fall asleep basically.
My most shameful binging was when I was really upset and I consciously turned to food hoping it would really hurt me. I ate so much, I can't even remember, but it involved lots of takeout and whatever else was in my house. The consequence was that I got my wish - I was violently sick for several days. BUT it also made me very aware that I had a serious problem. I still have issues with binging, but it's not nearly on the scale it used to. BUT it's still there and I still know I emotionally eat, so progress needs to be made!
I've binged so many times in the past, but the sad thing is that I would never try to hide it or be ashamed of it. I don't know why but I'd even used to brag about how much I would eat.
One day I ate 9 krispy kream donuts for breakfast and I told everyone about it!
Another time a bunch of friends and I went to Sheetz to get fast food and I only had $5 to spend. So I told everyone I could get the most food for only $5. That was 2 hot dogs, 1 cheeseburger, a side of mac n cheese, and a bag of fries. I said jokingly "this is to share guys, I'm gonna share!" Then we went back and I ate it all like no ones business.
I guess I never realized how fat this was making me so I wasn't as embarrassed as I am now looking back... YIKES! just thinking of it makes me never want to binge again
I've had a binge problem for nearly as long as I can remember. But being alone in my car was the main trigger for me. OMG...remembering the piles of fast food boxes, cups and wrappers shoved under my seat makes me uncomfortable even today. My main rule for binging was to do it alone and so naturally once I had children I was rarely alone. I NEVER would want them to see me in that feeding frenzied state I got into. So naturally I had less and less binges. I could easily pack away 5000 calories+ in a binge...and then go to the gym for 3-4 hours (that was my purge). It took getting sick and tired of how it made me feel for me to stop. I deserve better than to be a garbage pail. It is such a burden to be a slave to food.
This all came to a head for me a little over a year ago. I really hadn't had many binges in the prior few years, but this day I did binge at home with my girls (although I doubt they noticed) and it was probably the best thing that could have happened!
I had made oatmeal raisin cookies with them during the day - about 3 dozen cookies. We had a great time making them and then I couldn't stop eating them. I forced myself to put 3 away for DH. The girls each ate a couple. I thought about throwing them away because I knew what was brewing. But no. I ate 2+ dozen cookies. Of course when Dh came home the girls were so pleased that they had made cookies and he obviously opened the cookie jar. There were his 3 cookies. He asked where they were and I lied and said we only baked 1 sheet. OMG! I realized in that moment that I was an addict. A junkie. And food was my drug. I was lying about it. And lying was the first thing that came to mind. Covering the truth. This broke my heart. I haven't binged since. Sure, I fallen off the wagon - but not what I consider binges. A few mindless hand to mouth moments and then I realize and STOP. Food will not be my master!
I also had to stop putting foods in "bad boxes" and "good boxes". Tell me I couldn't have a tortilla chip and by G-d I would eat an entire bag. Tell me I couldn't have a candy and I'd eat a King sized version. Once I allowed myself to eat the foods, yes even the "bad" foods that I enjoyed, but in measurable and reasonable amts I continued to stay free from the binges and even the thoughts of binging. So I knew there were tortilla chips (ok, together with salsa they re my FAV food!) at home and that I could have 1 oz of them if I needed to. And once it was like that then it became a challenge to see how many days (or hours!) I could go without having 1 oz.
I cannot say that I peacefully co-exist with food today. Some days are effortless and others are a struggle. I'm learning what works for me as I go. I'm enjoying more whole foods and like how they make me feel. Balancing out my diet (I loosely follow the Zone diet) helps to keep me satisfied. I do struggle with my weight but have been in a steady-slow loss mode for over 1 year now. It may take me another year to be at a healthy weight. Who cares. It's about the journey and finding out way and what works for us.
Well I gained weight back by eating huge pizzas and drinking Fat Tire beer, they call it that name for a reason. I guess you'd say I went on a 2-3 month binge and gained 20 lbs...
^when I was younger my favorite thing was to order the big new yorker pizza from pizza hut and drink a 6 pack of Corona beer. I shudder to think how many calories were in all of that.
as i look back ( which it is not that far back) i have soo many different stories.. here is one...
i am super addicted to food.. so usually when i USED to go out to eat ( mcd's or fast food) i would almost always do the two meal things.. both super sized with a drink... i would often eat the first meal before i even got home.. then i would go inside with everyones food and usually the kids had the happy meals.. but they never finished it so they would bring it to me while i was eating my second value meal! my ex didnt think anything of it at the time... my fiancee grew smart quick to this and decided that if i needed two sandwhiches then i would have to make one a grilled chicken sandwich and only one super size fry. i was so embarrassed that he busted me out and i denied and denied and he said ... duh.. i seen the receipt! lol there was also another horrible thing i used to do... i am a bored eater.. you know watching tv or whatever.. so before i would sit in front of the tv i would make a frozen pizza and get a bag of doritos and a few sodas.. i would eat that crap til the pizza and chips and soda was gone and then fall asleep.. **** sometimes i would fall asleep between bites!! i have also done that whole buy a new box thing.. but i did it with snickers ice cream bars... i ate the whole box and i had to go to sams and buy a new one so my ex didnt know...
Sometimes when I was at college, I'd get a bus back from the city and then I'd wait around for half an hour for the bus from town to home (in a village). Luckily, haha, there was a Tesco supermarket near the busstop with a seating area!
I'd buy a bag of those huge bakery cookies, 5 in a pack, and often eat the lot along with a sandwich or whatever. Then I'd get dinner at home later.
I was never over 140lbs though. In retrospect, I was very lucky. The way I ate, I should have been larger than 2 houses.
For some reason, I though about food all morning/afternoon.
For Breakfast I had a good bowl of Fiber 1 before leaving for school. Around 12 I had a cut up apple with a bit of granola for a snack..
For lunch I made a really good salad and added a Veggie burger for protein and filling... but that wasnt enough.
I had 1 low carb tortilla
3/4 of a low fat fiber bar thing
2 very generous bowls of cereal
and another tortilla.
Its been hard to keep my eating under control the last couple of days (even though I never really gave into anything, it was just hard to keep control)
I just moved back in with my parents to finish school without having to worry about a fulltime job. But now I'm lonely because many of my friends go to school far away, Im having the worst luck finding a job, and after having a "cheat" night on Friday I've been carrying about 3lbs of water weight and it has been frustrating me.
Reading this again... I'm remembering that I have ordered delivery food before and right after paying the person as they're walking away, I'd call out loud enough for them to hear "Hey guys, food's here!" to the empty house.
Yep done that one too!
As well as almost all the others. Ordering for two, ordering kids meals, fake conversations on the cel phone, party list, saying I hope this is what they want or he'll only eat it that way. Hiding food, the halloween candy thing did that just this past Halloween.
The only one I havent done is going out and buying something to replace something else but just b/c I was never smart enough to think of that.
And I ate what I want at sit down restaraunts b/c I always went out with other fat people. But I do remember going out with one of the higher ups from my job and his wife and I didnt get what I wanted then.
Okay reading this thread makes me feel better Im not alone but also it makes me realize how ridiculous doing all those things are.
My most recent and memorable were not too long ago when my husband would work late or overnight and even though I hate to be alone Id get excited. Id go out with the baby and buy either a $5 pizza or the buy one get one small pizzas and a 2 liter of pepsi, stop at the store and get cupcakes and maybe some chips. And Id go home and just eat like it had been days since I had eaten.
I could never finish everything and hated throwing it away so sometimes I had "evidence" left over but I didnt care. It was a high to just sit and eat like that and I knew I could never do it AND ENJOY IT with him home.
I got to where I looked forward to his not being home instead of dreading it.
Last week he had one of those days and it was the first one in a long while and after dropping him off I was so tempted to go thru the pizza place but I didnt do it.
Gosh, this is sad. I can't believe food is so close to a drug for so many people. I have so many binge stories they're countless. Here are a few:
When I was in Junior High and high school I ate like there was no tomorrow. My grandmother bought me anything I wanted when we went shopping so of course the bill would be like $300 and half of it was for me. LOL It runs in the family. My Granny calls us the gravy family because we all love food so much! Anyhoo: On the weekends I had nothing to do but eat and watch movies from morning til night. In a matter of 5 hours tops I could devour cookies, brownies, franco american spaghetti (in the can) with 1/2 bag of shredded cheese and 1/2 bag of nacho cheese doritos, a banana, ramen noodle soup, a cooler ranch dorito sandwich with miracle whip, AND a can of corn beef hash!!!!!! I am not lying to you. My best friend watched me do it one weekend and she almost fell over. She couldn't believe that I could down that much food and not be sick sick sick. She is twice my size and always has been. I guess I was lucky because I should be the size of a house!
There were a few times I would go to the grocery store and have a list and end up buying $50 worth of extra junk I had no intentions of getting. Grocery shopping is a weakness to me so I try to do it on a full stomach otherwise I want everything in sight and when I get home I will eat a little bit of everything I bought. I just did this the other day. I got home and ate 1/2 jar of baby dill pickles and then 1/2 the jar of my sweet gherkins. Then I made myself a GIANT bowl of noodles with butter, pasta sauce, and parmesan cheese. And topped it off with a cupcake! It's terrible. I honestly don't know where all of it goes. I know I have alot of weight too lose but I should be a lot bigger than I am. Gosh!
I hate it. It is so hard to break this vicious cycle. It seems impossible sometimes. but I have seen others do it so I can too. I just have to keep believing that I'm gonna change my life for good.
donuts and candy were always my big thing, and I'd eat chips or other salty things as a way to balance out the sugar side effects.
There have been plenty of times during which I've eaten a dozen donuts in a day, several quarts of ice cream, or two family sized bags of candy.
been there, done that!
Anyhoo: On the weekends I had nothing to do but eat and watch movies from morning til night. In a matter of 5 hours tops I could devour cookies, brownies, franco american spaghetti (in the can) with 1/2 bag of shredded cheese and 1/2 bag of nacho cheese doritos, a banana, ramen noodle soup, a cooler ranch dorito sandwich with miracle whip, AND a can of corn beef hash!!!!!! I am not lying to you. My best friend watched me do it one weekend and she almost fell over. She couldn't believe that I could down that much food and not be sick sick sick. She is twice my size and always has been. I guess I was lucky because I should be the size of a house! 
