Finding the balance...Can you help me with this?

  • I see that I have the same issues as alot of you in here, either go all out and eat, and eat and eat. Or eat nothing. Of course naturally to complicate things, I go on binges thinking I can purge, gotta love the Bulemia tendencies shoved into this obsession with food...seems it's not at fun as Hollywood portrays.

    Anyway, I want to start and I want to do this right. I've read so much stuff about if you restrict your calories too much you won't lose weight, but I find it really hard to balance this? How much is too little to eat, from your own experience, or how do I stop myself from going in these massive binges which make me not care, and then want to spend my evening in the bathroom...

    Anyway, any words of wisdom as to how to find the balance would be great

    Thanks!

    Xx
    S
  • If you have any tendency towards food obsession or an eating disorder...calorie counting will ONLY make it worse.

    I promise you! I'm 19 now. I havn't eaten normally for 5 years, firstly being anorexic, then a periodic binge eater, then slightly/very bulimic.

    With bingeing/bulimia, weight/calories/actual food eaten is not the issue. What IS the issue is composed of the following - low self esteem, feeling out of control, how you got to be where you are at.

    The solution is nothing to do with dieting or counting anything. Its to do with

    1) Building your self esteem
    2) Learning about proper nutrition
    3) Having the self-love to put 1) and 2) together

    and therefore

    4) Naturally eating less, and slowly and naturally losing weight.

    Of course, this does not have the allure and promise of a diet or rigid set of rules - but I truly believe the only way to kick a food obsession is to make YOU more important.

    Love,
    Emily
  • Hi SilverIris,

    I totally agree with cousinrockingchair on this one. Esp. coming from just being a binger ever since I was little. I found that I would eat in order to gain some control in my life.
    So I heard it's really helpful for you to track when you eat in a journal and how you were feeling at the time. When you do this, you will find out what in your life makes you binge or not eat at all. I found this to be very helpful and it also kept me in check b/c I would have to write about it.

    I wish you all the best : - )
  • Okay, well Emily has it right on the money.

    But, I know how you feel, it is really very difficult to strike the right balance. It is almost frightening to eat more, because it feels as if it will lead right into a full on binge. And when I restrict I feel so much more in control and "happy" with myself. And when I eat even over say, 1500c. I feel as if it is the end of the world.

    I am working on the principles that Emily has posted, because they really are fundamental to being healthy and happy. And it is the most balanced way to go about eating.
  • I agree with Emily that going on a plan that counts calories, points, etc. can make things worse. Of course, these plans work for some people, but they definitely lead me to binge more. Once you've figured out if those plans work for you or not, I think if you find that they don't, the journal that mnms suggested is a great idea. I write what I eat in a journal but I don't keep track of calories or exact portions. That way if you aren't losing you can look at your food journal and see if you need to change what or how much you're eating. This allows you to eat more naturally and keep from feeling deprived, which can lead to fewer or less severe binging episodes. I also totally agree with losing weight more slowly and naturally, so it will stay off for good!
  • Thank You,

    It's not that i have low self esteem overall...just about my size. But it depresses me so much and sometimes I just don't want to leave the house...(and yeah, I'm all of a size 8...)

    I think the secret for me may be exercise. It's worked for my aunt, and as I'm also quite petite naturally I think that toning may help my body confidence. I figure if I focus on building muscle, I have to be eating appropriate amounts of protien, carbohydrates etc etc...

    Argh I don't know! Going home tomorrow. so It's time to get my *** into gear and sorting myself out.