I had every intention of having a snack and being done with food for the rest of the night. However thats not how things went down. After my snack i had a can of clam chowder that is 130 calories per serving and 2 servings in the can. I ate the whole can and then had 2 small chocolate bunnies. I am at 1435 calories after everything is said and done. I feel horrible about it and am on the verge of going into the kitchen and eating anything i can get my hands on. I didn't go over my calories, actually am a bit under, but i hate that i ate the clam chowder and chocolate. My stomach actually kind of hurts and i am so sad that i didn't go out and grab some veggies instead of the chowder.

You made what you consider to be a bad choice. Really, though, how bad of a choice was it?

You regret not having gone for veggies, but you are still under your calorie limit having eaten the chowder and chocolate. While there are obvious differences between the choices, you didn't violently fling yourself off-course by going with the more calorie-dense option this time around. In fact, you're still on track.

So, while your choice wasn't great, it wasn't particularly bad. What is worrying, though...:
DO NOT BINGE.

Obviously, the solution to feeling horrible is not to raid your kitchen - that will only make it worse. You've already stopped yourself before ruining your day, and your stomach already hurts.

Right now, you have no real reason to be upset with yourself. You made a not-so-great choice, but it didn't throw you off - no harm is done. All that binging will do is perpetuate the upset-eat-upset-eat cycle, and you are both stronger and smarter than that. Don't let it get to you.

EDIT TO ADD:
You are not going to make flawless food choices for the rest of your life. That isn't what life (or, more specifically, calorie counting) is about. What you're looking to do is stay within certain limits in order to meet your weight loss goals. When that number on the scale reaches the number you seek, you redefine those parameters in order to stay in that desired weight range. I'm sorry that you're unhappy with your choices today, but that never makes the day a waste. Life happens. Learn from the mistakes you make along the way, and remember that mistakes are okay.

This is not easy.
You will have good and bad days.
Sometimes, you will be discouraged.
Sometimes, you will be elated.
You are going to make mistakes...
...and you are going to learn from them.

You can do this - there's no doubt it my mind. And yet, you have to believe that you can do this, and keep your goals in sight. Stick around the site, even if you're mainly a lurker like myself. These people will encourage, inspire, and enlighten...and they will also kick you in the butt when you let yourself down.

Good luck to you. Do not let yourself give up control. You've got this!

Thanks, yes i am still under my calories but i can't shake the feeling that i did something bad. I seem to have this idea that it is all or nothing. I can't go off track, i need to be on the diet 100% and can have no mistakes. I KNOW this to be wrong, because we are all human and make mistakes. I think i am over the "need to stuff my face" feeling...at least i hope. I'm going and throwing all of the chocolate away right after i post this. There is no need to keep it, my children are so young they won't even notice its gone.

Food isn't bad. Food is good. It's life-sustaining, it's tasty, it's satisfying. It isn't a mistake to eat food, even food that you may tell yourself is "bad"--because unless it's literally spoiled or contaminated, there is no such thing as "bad" food.

Was it the absolute best, healthiest choice you could make? Maybe not, but neither was it a terrible choice to eat soup and follow it with some chocolate. You're under your calories for the day; why do you feel as though you've done something wrong when you haven't exceeded your calories?

One thing that I didn't quite understand from your post: you were at 1435 calories which was "a bit under" your daily intake even with your soup and chocolates, yet you were going to "have a snack and be done with food?" It sounds to me like you're technically aiming for 1500, but actually aiming much lower and punishing yourself for actually approaching your caloric limit. I'm asking because I've fallen into that trap once or twice myself--the trap of thinking, "if 1500 is good, then 1200 is better!" and deciding to leave some food off my plate. It can rebound on you in some very bad ways, including a desire to eat everything in sight for a day or two after dropping calories too low.

If you're aiming for 1500 calories (and I'm guessing you are, as that'd be a bit above your actual caloric intake), then why are you sweating 1435? Was it that the meal was unplanned? Was it that canned soup and chocolates seem like "bad" foods? Was it that you're trying to watch your dietary intake of something else as well as calories--sodium, sugar, carbs--and something in your extra food didn't mesh with that?

Calorie counting does NOT follow the "if a little is good, then more is better" philosophy. If a little cut in your daily calories shaves a pound a week from your body, doubling your caloric reduction does NOT necessarily mean you'll lose two pounds a week. I know how hard it is not to pat yourself on the back for coming in under your calorie limit--I do it myself sometimes, though I know I shouldn't--but it really isn't praiseworthy. It isn't something you should punish yourself for either, but try to break free of the "less is better" mindset; it's not a healthy or sustainable way to think.

It's tough to break away from the all-or-nothing thinking, too, but once you do, it's SO freeing to be able to say, "You know...I feel like eating cheese and crackers and following it up with some chocolate!" and knowing that you can have these things and still be on your plan. It's the beauty of calorie-counting, so relax and enjoy that fact.

I was pretty much going to say exactly this, but Nola Celeste beat me to it (and said it much more articulately than I would have!).

DON'T fall into the trap of over-restricting. It sets you up for a vicious cycle of binging and restricting, and messes with your mind. Calorie counting is NOT a way to punish yourself for being overweight. It's way to lose weight in a slow, sustainable, healthy way that leads to lifetime good habits.

No it's not bad. You didn't kill anyone, you didn't kick a dog or slap a baby. You made a food choice. You may find (I certainly did) that taking "bad" out of the food equation actually helps you make better choices and maintain stronger motivation the long run.

For me, taking the moral judgement out of dieting has been instrumental to my success (I don't think it's coincidence that my only long-term success has been achieved with guilt-free efforts). When I felt "guilty" for eating mistakes (whether or not it's a true mistake or just a vague guilt-for-no-reason feeling), I also tended to give up or decide that "I've already blown it, so eating more can't do more damage."

But the fact is while every bite "counts" there's no reason or need to feel guilty. In my experience the guilt is counterproductive.

It's true that every bite matters. Every pound (every ounce) matters. Maintenance matters as much or more than weight loss, but I can believe all of that without a single second of guilt.

An added benefit, is that weight loss/dieting/exercise is a whole lot more fun, when it's guilt-free. And it's a lot easier to stick with something that doesn't have an unpleassant association. Guilt-free weight loss is easier weight loss.

And anything that can make the process easier is a good thing.

Some people say guilt keeps them on track. If that's true for you, if guilt works for you both in the short and long term, and you're happy living under the guilt umbrella, then more power to you. But if guilt doesn't help you succeed, then get rid of it, especially if it makes you stressed and unhappy and tempted to binge because of it - which by the way makes no sense 9even though we're all "taught" to do it, because it's how we see so many people do it. But the logic isn't there - it would be like feeling bad for kicking a puppy and deciding that because you're such a horrible person for kicking that puppy, you might as well (and probably should to get it out of your system) kill the puppy tonight so you can start fresh, promising to be nice to puppies starting tomorrow.


If the guilt doesn't work for you. Ditch it. Guilt may not feel like a choice, but it is. It's self-talk. And just as you can choose what to say to others out loud, you can choose what to say to yourself inside your head (even if you have to argue with yourself for a while, in order to do it. Choose to drown out the guilt-voices with your logic-voice. Eventually you'll believe whatever you tell yourself most often - make that logic-based, not guilt-based).