At the start of January I started a calorie controlled diet and fitness programme on the first 3 days I was absolutely fine, enjoyed what I was doing, completed the exercise, never went over my calorie limit and was loosing about a pound a day but on day 4 I woke up with a negative mindset and went straight to the chocolate then binged all day and gave up.

Then 2 weeks ago, I started again but the same thing happened, on day 4 I woke up, saw a bar of chocolate, ate it, felt sick then kept on eating (eventhough I had lost 5lbs that week and was feeling positive).

I hate being fat (165lbs, want to loose approx 40lbs) and really want to be a healthy weight and cut out all the takeaways (this past week mon, tues and thurs evenings we had takeaways) and I always feel really bad afterwards.

I want to start my diet again but I dont want to go to the effort of planning out a whole week, buying the food and then wasting it because I give up on day 4, I know it would probably help if I banned all fatty foods from the house completely and made everyone eat what I was eating so there were no temptations and never order anymore takeaways and start a routine where I go shopping the same day every week, but other than that I dont know what I could do to stop failing on day 4, any suggestions

If you are good more often than you are off-plan ... it'll still work. The trick is to stop in time. If you start to mess up on that 4th day ... stop, have a drink of water, go for a walk, come here and read. Stop it in it's tracks. One bad day or a part of a day gone bad won't hurt you.

Tell us what you've been doing on the good days. Maybe we can help with some tricks to make that 4th day more manageable.

Don't buy your trigger foods. If you don't see them, and they are not handy, you won't be able to eat them.

You were losing a pound each DAY? Is that a typo? If it isn't, how few calories were you consuming daily prior to binging on Day 4? I mean, it seems that weight loss was water and muscle tissue. Seems like slow and steady wins the race with weight loss. If it's any indication, it has taken me 5 months -- yes, i said five -- to lose ten pounds, but I've done it through lifestyle changes that have now become second nature. I would binge on Day 4 too if I had to follow some unrealistic caloric restriction, or if I had an all-or-nothing attitude about things. You can do this, but it does take some planning! If you've purchased ingredients for a week's worth of dinners, for example, there'll be no excuse for picking up takeout.

It wasn't an unrealistic it was 1400 to 1500 calories per day.

When I eat something I am not supposed to I just seem to think "ah well I have failed now" and then carry on eating

I usually plan the week ahead keep to the following:
Breakfast: 200 (usually porridge made with water or weetabix with milk)
Lunch: 300 (I find this the most difficult to plan and usually have chicken and salad, a sandwich, soup or jacket potato with beans)
Dinner: 500 (a tesco healthy living ready meal if I am busy otherwise, chicken and veg, risotto (ediets recipe) prawns etc.)
Then 400 calories for fruit, cereal bars, low fat yoghurts/mousses etc.

You take lunch with you to work or something like that? It is hard.

I wish you had some extra protein instead of the sandwich or cereal bars ... um ... big big salad ... buckets of green leafy stuff????

I work from home, the problem with the lunches is I can never actually think of anything for 300 cals that will fill me up and stop me wanting to snack.

I dont really like leafy stuff, I eat lettuce when its in a sandwich or with other food so I cant really taste it or lettuce when its mixed with mashed potatoes/other vegetables. The only nuts I like are peanuts and if I start eating them I eat far too many.

Nuts and peanut butter are a killer for me. I don't want some ... I want them ALL!

There's nothing wrong with snacking, provided it stays within your calorie range. Do you have to have lunch at noon? You could have two 150 cal snacks instead.

I just bought snow peas for supper but I might have to go back and get more. They are good raw!

I usually try and space my meals 4-5 hours apart. It would probably be easier for me to jsut have 1 300 cal meal as I wouldn't know what kind of filling 150cal snack I could have.

Try having a look at the food lists here
http://www.bodyforlife.com/nutrition/foodlist.asp
Simple, plain, real food. Simple is best for me

Keep asking questions and read read read ... We're right here to help.

The whole point of counting calories is that you can eat whatever you want.

I would not stay on plan if I was eating every 4 or 5 hours. I eat every 2 -3 hours.

I also work at home. All my lunches are less then 300 calories.
- Morning Star farms chick pattie - 150 calories with a ton of steamed cauliflower and green beans. Sometimes I eat their Spicy Bean Burger (140 cals) instead. They have lots of varieties. You can find what you like best
- a 3oz. can of tuna in water, a sliced red pepper, a sliced kirby, 2 - 17 calorie brown rice cakes and 5 almonds.
- A grilled chicken breast (200 cals) cut up and put into a huge salad with romaine lettuce, kirbys, scallions and red peppers.

As far as snacks my favorite is Danon Fat free/sugar free yogurt (60 cals) with a tablespoon of Fiber One Cereal - it adds crunch and tastes a lot better then it sounds. Very satisfying. Sometimes I'll just cook up (advantage of working from home) a huge bowl of veggies for a snack. You've got to think outside of the box. It doesn't have to be the usual snack foods.

Robin, pardon my stupidity, but what is a kirby?

I agree with susan more days on program than off will be ok. Also if you know by day 4 your burning out why not build in a day where you allow a choclate bar? Or whatever it is that your craving. Eventually you can ween yourself off, but I think just being consistent in whatever you decide would be a good first step.