TMI Sexy Time Question

  • This is going to be TMI, and I am apologizing up front for it. anyone else experiencing sex in a different way after weight loss, and not necessarily in a good way?

    Let me explain....DH is not a largely endowed man, but nor is he small. He's rather average in both length and girth and I like that. Too much length has always been painful for me so he is just right. And his girth is just the right amount to make me feel pleasantly full.

    And then, I lost 70 pounds. 70 pounds of cushioning fat.

    Suddenly, his length is too long and I find that when sexy time is eminent, instead of fessing up to him, I feign the sleepys. I mean, who wants to tell their significant other that sex with him/her hurts? And as if that wasn't bad enough, suddenly his girth doesn't give me that just right full feeling. Don't get me wrong, I still can feel him, but it isn't the super tight feeling I used to get, it feels more like...I dunno...full but not tight? Hard to explain (and embarrasing too...) So, now, not only is sex painful for me, I am not getting the complete pleasure I once got. Which sucks, but I feel super sexy for the first time in years and am nervous about having sex with my beloved.

    Anyone else have a negative change in your sex life due to weight loss, and if so, how are you combating it?
  • I have not experienced this with weight loss but I for sure did when I gained.

    My honest with your husband. The truth is you guys got used to body position when your body was bigger. Now it is smaller. So try different positions and movements etc.

    Who knows, it may be a boost to his ego to know that now he has suddenly "grown" LOL
  • Yes, what lazylioness said. And do some Kegels as well.
  • Quote: Yes, what lazylioness said. And do some Kegels as well.
    Ditto this.
  • My husband is quite long and sex can be painful for us. It has always been bad from behind but now that there is MUCH less fat between the 2 of us, it can be an issue in any position.

    A couple suggestions - first the easy one - as far as girth goes, that's on you - as others have said Kegels, kegels, kegels.

    For the length issues - first you should be honest. Second - LUBE. Lots and lots. Third - climb on top where you can control how deep.

    Hope this helps!

  • Great advice.

    #1 thing - TALK to him about it!!!