Body Image and Issues after Weight Loss Including discussions about excess skin and reconstructive surgery

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Old 02-02-2012, 12:34 PM   #1  
Suck it up, buttercup!
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I know it will take a while to get used to being at a normal(ish) weight but sometimes I feel really odd. Especially with people who didn't know me before I lost all the pounds.

For example people talk to me about exercising and sports now. People never talked to me about that. I guess assuming (right for most years) that I don't do sports. Now they ask if I am a runner
I am still totally amazed that I can talk about it without feeling odd or guilty (because I don't workout) or that I don't know what to say because I have no clue!

Another example is going shopping and asking for a too big size (still happens) and the retail person's odd looks. Like "what do you want with a large size".

It is also really strange when people just don't recognize me! I don't think about my different appearance every minute of the day so it really baffles me sometimes when I meet somebody on the street and they have no clue who I am at first.

Anybody else have awkward moments or great experiences like that? Please share :-)
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Old 02-02-2012, 12:41 PM   #2  
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Yes, I've had some awkward and interesting comments. One of my favorite comments, which I took as a compliment, but was slightly odd- even though she meant it as a joke, was a woman I met on the playground. We were talking about our kids....how old, how many, and when I said that I have 6 kids she looked me up and down then said, "I guess you just don't have time to eat!"

She didn't know me in my previous body, so she just saw a slender me. I like meeting new people without having all the weight loss issues brought up. So many of my friends and family keep bringing it up, and I fear I'll always be the woman they're watching for a fat relapse. They'll watch what I eat, what I don't eat, if I gain a few pounds, if I lose more pounds- it seems never ending sometimes.
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Old 02-03-2012, 01:05 AM   #3  
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lol not having time to eat. sometimes i wish i didnt.

oh yes i do believe some people are watching for a regain. in fact, i didnt worry so much about it, because i was so worried about losing. i could never get to "maintenance" so it wasnt like i worried about "maintaining" where i was. i was always trying to lose. well, i went back to my old church, and someone goes "and you've kept all that weight off!!!!" omg(( like it was the surprise of the centry. i had no idea that they assumed that oh she will just gain it back. i dont do the crash diets because i'm hypoglycemic, and i don't do the low carb stuff either. so it's not like i'm starving and not eating and then going to gorge. on a regular basis, anyway. but its amazing how people just assume you will not eat ice cream for however long and then you'll give in and gorge on ice cream again. well i didnt gain off of ice cream anyway so i get really hacked off at some of that stuff.

even today i'm working at a new location, trying to be nice and professional with everybody, and somebody goes "oh didnt you used to go to such and such church, etc? " so i had to say yes. she goes "and you're looking good!" so i just said thanks and walked away. i didnt remember her and had no desire to discuss my looks with her or the work associates omg. she did seem sensible and try to be tactful about it though, but it was so unnecessary. she could have done it privately some other time if she thought she had to say soemthing.
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Old 02-03-2012, 01:10 AM   #4  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by josey View Post
I know it will take a while to get used to being at a normal(ish) weight but sometimes I feel really odd. Especially with people who didn't know me before I lost all the pounds.

For example people talk to me about exercising and sports now. People never talked to me about that. I guess assuming (right for most years) that I don't do sports. Now they ask if I am a runner
I am still totally amazed that I can talk about it without feeling odd or guilty (because I don't workout) or that I don't know what to say because I have no clue!

Another example is going shopping and asking for a too big size (still happens) and the retail person's odd looks. Like "what do you want with a large size".

It is also really strange when people just don't recognize me! I don't think about my different appearance every minute of the day so it really baffles me sometimes when I meet somebody on the street and they have no clue who I am at first.

Anybody else have awkward moments or great experiences like that? Please share :-)

I feel exactly the same. A few weeks ago I was at my old high school. I was in the bathroom with one of my teachers, I greeted her and I was stunned when she didn't greet me back. After a few seconds she regognised me. She was like "What? Is that you??? You're sooooo small!"
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Old 02-03-2012, 05:54 AM   #5  
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There are a number of people who I have met here who never knew me anywhere close to my highest. It's funny because many of the other moms where I live has always known me as a relatively fit mom who spends a lot of time in the gym. I've even had some ask me for workout routines!

That being said, sometimes I feel very strange with they get into the "diet and exercise talk". You know the thing where women talk about how much they gained over the holidays, how they need to exercise but don't and then they go into intimate detail about what delicious foods they ate? I feel kind of awkward because it's not something I participate in, anymore so I just stand there feeling a bit out of place. I don't mind that they talk about those things but I'd feel pretty odd interjecting with "nope, I ate well during the holidays but still exercises a lot and maintained my weight by listening to my body when I was full. I actually ended up losing weight shortly after the holidays were over". I think I'd be flogged alive! So I just keep my mouth shut and smile and nod.

On the other hand, people who knew the former me we sometimes be absolutely shocked when they her my husband and myself talk about hitting the gym or pick a meal at a restaurant by its calories. I think it's probably a bigger switch for them than us because we've become used to the new us whereas if they haven't seen us for awhile it's got to be a pretty drastic change!!
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Old 02-03-2012, 10:46 AM   #6  
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What I absolutely hate is when somebody introduces me as "the one that lost so much weight". AAHHHHH!!! Or when somebody mentions it in a conversation with somebody I just met. Like it is the achievement everybody needs to know me by. I mean I am proud of what I lost but I am not proud that I have to lose over 70 lbs to be normal.
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Old 02-05-2012, 05:36 PM   #7  
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omg i know exactly what you mean((((
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Old 02-05-2012, 09:59 PM   #8  
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I love your story runningfromfat - I also no longer participate in holiday binges. This past year I ate very well, worked out and lost a few pounds over the holidays, so it was weird to talk with people saying that they had to work off their holiday pounds! There was no way I was going to say "I have no holiday weight gain!"

My weirdest moments have been with guy friends that I've known for a long time. I find that they don't really know what to say when they haven't seen you in a while. An old friend from my church said "Wow, you look....so different! That's awesome!" So funny! Then a month or so ago an old friend of my husband's said "I haven't seen you in so long. You look...better!" Weird...but I don't think they know how to respond without saying the wrong thing, so I didn't mind. Haha!
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Old 02-13-2012, 08:49 AM   #9  
Suck it up, buttercup!
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I just noticed something else. I still think I can't squeeze by people on the train. Apparently I "feel" way bigger than I am!
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Old 02-15-2012, 08:59 AM   #10  
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The strangest thing for me is the but you don't need to lose weight.
You know the type of talk we gave to skinny girls when they went on about the pizza they gorged on? Honey, you can afford it.
Now that I've started hanging out with people who didn't know what I looked like before, I'm getting a lot of those comments. When I reveal how much bigger I used to be, they're always in awe which is still nice
It took me about two years to fully get to where I am right now so I've gotten used to the little changes and now I don't find it so weird anymore because I have become that person- the one who talks about exercise and grabs a size small in shirts. It's just about getting used to it, I guess.
The only thing that bugs me is the whole competition in sports thing. I never played sports when I was fat because I was afraid I'd fail (and I did). I've never played during my weight loss and I don't play now. A really fit male friend told me he wanted to play tennis with me and I really want to play. I'm just scared to. That's what bugs me.
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