Beck Diet For Life/Solution – January 2023 – Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach
 

Welcome to the discussion group, support group, Diet Coach group, Diet Buddy group relating to the two books by Dr. Judith S. Beck:

The Complete Beck Diet for Life

and the first book

The Beck DIET solution: train your brain to think like a thin person.

The Beck Diet Solution is a psychological program, not a food plan. It provides a step-by-step program to learn specific techniques to stay on our diet, lose weight, and maintain our weight loss for life. The program is based on Dr. Beck's clinical research in Cognitive Therapy (CT).

The Complete Beck Diet for Life expands the earlier work and includes a food plan with suggested menus. From the cover:
With The Complete Beck Diet for Life you'll discover the 5 stages of successful dieting and maintenance. You'll learn how to motivate yourself, give yourself credit for every change you make, create time and energy for dieting, and handle hunger and cravings. Dr. Beck eases you into changing one step at a time. You'll master one task before moving on to the next. And you'll learn techniques to deal with challenging situations, such as sticking with our plan at celebrations and dealing with "food pushers." With Dr. Beck's skills, you'll achieve a lifetime of healthful eating and lifelong motivation.

This is a place to discuss the Beck strategies and our daily efforts, to receive and provide support, and, for some of us, is where we serve as on-line diet buddy (coach) to each other.

If you’ve arrived from a search engine, you've landed at the site of 3 Fat Chicks (3FC), a remarkable place for those interested in a healthy life style, including mindful eating, exercise, and weight loss. More about the site, including how to register so that you can post, can be found here.

The books are available on Amazon through the 3FC store by clicking their names above; buying through 3FC helps to cover the costs of running this site.

You can find the list of previous (or more current) monthly Beck threads here on 3 Fat Chicks via:

List of Monthly Beck Threads for Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

Sunday - New Year's Day
 

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Happy New Year to those who follow the Gregorian Calendar introduced by Pope Gregory XIII in 1582 to replace the Julian Calendar. Those of you still using the Julian Calendar introduced by Julius Caesar in 45 BCE to replace the Roman Calendar will have to wait 13 days for the new year. And best wishes nonetheless to those of you using the Jewish, Islamic, Indian, and Chinese Calendars. And Double best wishes to those using the Mayan Calendar since I've not figured out the long cycle thing. Nor do I understand the Persian Calendar dating back to Muhammad's Hegira in 622 CE, because it's a solar calendar with the year beginning on midnight of the vernal equinox in Iran. And special hats off to those who find it fascinating how civilizations have worked to understand the yearly cycle so they could plant crops, administer society, document history, and designate days of celebration.

Our DD picked up the (7 yo) DGD after her overnight. DD had had her car 'detailed' to rid the interior of any memory of last week's throwing up. Every aspect of her car looks brand new. I was impressed. She paid about $200 for a group of people to come to her driveway and work for three hours. She didn't even supply water; they used bottles and jugs of dozens of different elixirs and specialty brushes and "A ton of rags." For about the same price, her local car washes offer a detailing where you bring in the car at 8am and pick it up at noon. That means two trips by Uber or a patient spouse. She's happy. Now I want one.

First thing the DGD did was show her mom the three pages of math work she'd done, carefully explaining each problem. Just love the joy at having done some math problems.



Joy (gardenerjoy) - Such a good idea to watch London's New Year celebration since they do it at such a reasonable time. Just like the British. [Your YouTube video is marked 'private' and doesn't play for me.]

maryann - Sorry to hear that your family was able to get under your skin even as you were actively working to prevent it. Many Kudos for "I do not have to overeat over this."

Karen (karenrn) - Congrats for getting your Christmas decorations down. DW has our tree stripped; today we'll bring it to the front yard ready to go to the curb on Tuesday.

curlyjax - Ouch for a return trip to have your inspection sticker applied - never heard of that one before. Hope the disquiet of the flashlight walking in your back woods goes down with time.

VertOlive - Your harp is just gorgeous. Is it full sized? Kudos for starting a new eating plan using your new book. Love hearing how citizens join wild life professionals to help your endangered Kemp's Ridley turtles.

Readers -

Happy New Year! After posting yesterday, I zipped off to the grocery store and bought ingredients for a healthy lentil soup, plus a baguette and other general groceries. I started making the soup, feeling very proud of myself for getting going so early, when DS tiptoed into the kitchen with the results of a covid test-positve, ack. He had a cold and tested negative for 2 days- I don't know if the other tests were old or if it took awhile to show up. All plans were scrapped, a kerfuffle ensued, and he is now quarantining at his friend's house who gave it to him, as they have a bed and bath in the basement, and our house is tiny. DD has some things she needs to do this week related to her health and her hospital job, and we really don't want her to get covid (or me). It was a long day but ended very well with DD and I having a very good chat,which was a lovely way to end the new year.
I am signed up to watch/participate in the No BS workshop on losing weight in 2023. It goes 5 hours and I don't know if i'll make it that long but it feels like a good way to start the New Year. My friend is okay with me coming over later in the day and hanging outside if I don't have symptoms/test negative, and its so warm out here, so we may end up doing a firepit. I over indulged in sweets but today is a new day and indeed a new year.
Bill-great that DD could get the car done so quickly. I can't wait to take the tree down, i'm done with it.
VertOlive- what a beautiful harp! I'm impressed that you can play.
Karen-fun to see an old memory of a party.
Maryann-I'm sorry you had that fight with your brother. Great job not eating about it!
Gardenerjoy-6 pm is a great time to celebrate indeed.

Good morning coaches,

Happy New Year! Food was on plan yesterday, but in spite of that I weighed in this morning one pound above a year ago at 138, but 7 pounds above my August weight of 131 after the hiking trip. My goal for the year is to get below 130 and preferably to 125. I feel a bit fluffy in the middle right now. I've gotten used to weighing a little less. Dh is down 7 pounds from last year and very happy about that. The other happy news is his sciatica has been much better for the last couple of days after upping the dose of Gabapentin. He even scrubbed the patio yesterday after his 6 mile walk. I was sure he would be sore today.

Each time I visit ds I have to take something for his burger stand. This year it's patty papers for between the hamburgers and maybe basket liners too. I have 20,000 patty papers arriving 1/3. I can take 2 suitcases with up to 50 pounds per bag. I'll see how much room they take up and then buy the basket liners. I guess paper products are much more expensive in Thailand. Sounds crazy, huh? He's a big boy, as in heavy, so I also take him clothes that are easier to find here. I don't think I'll have much room in the suitcases to take much for myself. Good thing I also won't need much. The weather is warm so only warm weather clothing.

Curlyjax Oh darn I'm so sorry to hear about ds getting Covid. I sure hope you two don't get it. It seems the people who I know that have gotten it also have a couple of negative tests before getting a positive test. Maybe the viral load isn't significant enough at first to show positive. You and DD having a good visit is a wonderful New Year's Eve.

Bill A detailed car would be great, especially after dgd destroying the interior last week. I can't imagine driving a car that smelled like vomit.

Waving to everybody and hoping your New Year has you feeling hopeful and inspired.

Happy New Year!

I danced along to the music with the fireworks in London which contributed to going over my exercise goal for December.

I had to look up why they played a snippet of "Sweet Caroline" -- with the crowd adding in the "so good"s just like they were in Fenway Park. "Sweet Caroline" was the theme song for England's women's football/soccer team that won Euro2022. According to Wikipedia, "Chloe Kelly, who scored the winning goal in the final, was being interviewed pitch side after the win but suddenly ran off with the microphone when the song started playing to sing along with the team."

There was also a touching tribute to the Queen.

We slept through any midnight noisemaking, which was a treat. I woke up this morning to streaks of pink in the sky in every direction. That's enough of a celebration of the New Year for me.

Exercise +50, 1720/1700 minutes for December

VertOlive: That harp is gorgeous!

curlyjax: I'm enjoying today as a new day and a new year. So sorry about your son getting COVID -- that's cool that he can recover with his friend, while you tend to the needs of yourself and your daughter.

Good Evening, Coaches.

I had a good cry last night and DH and DS said all the rights things. We had a wonderful day at the Monterey Bay Aquarium which I must say is unparalleled. It was a beautiful sunny day after a torrential downpour. I took a long walk on the rocky coast of Northern California Coast and that is as well unparalleled. I bought DS a stuffed isopod :) https://www.ebay.com/itm/224370747256. We could touch a real one and fell in love. DS hasn't put it down yet. Good Memories.

I am ready to be done holidaying and back to a routine of healthy food and exercise ( says everyone on Jan. 2.)

Wave

All six dogs made it through the Armageddon of fireworks for New Years in pretty good shape; no one even went under the bed! I made it through 100 ounces of water yesterday and am struggling to repeat that today--I have more to go even at 10pm, so we'll see. I was able to finish the year at a good weight and have been reading and thinking about changes I want to make for the new year. Life has been so hectic that I seldom get to just sit with myself and think. That in itself I'd like to change!

To those asking: my harp is an Irish lever harp and it has 38 strings and comes up to my chin in height. For its type, it is full sized. Some may be thinking of the larger pedal harps which have @ 47 strings and can stand as tall as 6 feet. I am smitten with my harp!

We are terribly sad at the passing of Pope Emeritus Benedict; it was he who blessed our marriage the year he was elected and I'm looking at his picture on our certificate now. Requiescat in pace, Benedictus...

Monday-Emir of Granada ends centuries of Muslim rule in the Iberian peninsula (1492)
 

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Fully masked and "Self-declared vaccinated and boosted," we were excited to go to a New Year's Day concert that started with Bach's Brandenburg Concerto No. 6. Would think we'd be tired of that by now having heard it a zillion times. But it was fresh, again. The conductor introduced two facts that have always been so but were new to me: there are no violins! there are two viola da gamba. Apparently, Bach had a generous patron who played the viola da gamba - played it fairly poorly by Bach's standards. So, he wrote a concerto where the viola da gamba not only didn't have a solo part, but had a twin in the next chair, and was squished between the other strings. While I thought I was watching a Double Bass being played, the program notes tell me it was a violone. Deep notes; towered over the short woman playing it; but not a Double Bass. A whole world of music history of which I know absolutely nothing. Hats off to those of you in the know.

Eating was mediocrity, but CREDIT moi because the opportunity was there to be worse. We dropped by a party after the concert that was featuring stollen (German Christmas Bread) in memory of someone's "old country." The stollen was good enough but the fruit cake sitting there unheralded was divine. Had two slices. Done just right. The hostess had said, "Whatever isn't eaten has to be taken home." And I had lusted and drooled. But the party ended and I hadn't managed to politely suggest that I'd help out by putting a couple of chunks into my blazer pocket. So, CREDIT moi for not taking home fruit cake even if it wasn't my noble decision not to do so.

Tree is down. Sadly lays in our driveway until trash day, tomorrow, when the city will pick it up to shred it for mulch in city parks.


Joy (gardenerjoy) - Neat story about "Sweet Caroline" being played in London for New Year's celebration. Would have blown my mind.

maryann - What a terrific young man to appreciate having his own stuffed isopod. Agree, "ready to be done holidaying."

Karen (karenrn) - So interesting what costs dearly in Thailand. Hope you don't get caught up by TSA wondering why you have suitcases filled with basket liners. Such good news that your DH is moving more comfortably.

curlyjax - Ouch for DS's positive COVID test results. Great solution to park him in the basement of his friend's house where he must have caught it. Lentil soup is so good, but lentil soup with baguette is over the top.

VertOlive - Thought I'd quickly look up the difference between a lever harp and pedal harp. Oops ... fell down a rabbit-hole of harp history. You harp players have been around quite a while. Again, yours is quite stunning. My condolences for the loss of Pope Emeritus Benedict. Just amazing that you have that personal connection.

Readers -

I got a lot out of the No BS workshop although it was too long for me, and I ended up feeling like I should have rode the exercise bike for a bit during it. I'm going to keep what is useful and discard the rest.There are some worksheets I still need to go thru with concrete ideas like what are ten small steps you can do to work towards your weight loss, how can you avoid roadbumps etc. Definitely a lot of CBT thinking.
My dad's place called and it sounds like my dad will need more care as he is freaking out and screaming when he wakes up for a nap and is confused,and is now venturing outside his apt like that. But other times he's fine and knows whats going on. I'm sure its very frustrating for him, but gosh its exhausting and depressing for us.
I went over to my friend's for dinner outside on her deck which was set up with candles and beautiful, but we eventually ended up inside. I way overdid it with the garlic bread- there's something about warm bread and butter that is soo good. I was in a glum mood because of my dad but we still had fun.
Today I'm meeting a friend at 10 for a walk which is sorely needed. We haven't seen each other in awhile so it will be good to catch up.Then I have got to catch up on my dad's mail and bills, and make a concrete food plan for the week. I'm telling myself to focus on lowering my cholesterol.
Karen- how funny to bring over so many patty papers! I'm so glad DH sciatica is better.
Gardenerjoy- so fun about the sweet Caroline. The sky sounds beautiful.
Maryann-yay for a good cry and supportive family.
VertOlive-wow, that's a lot of dogs, do they all get walked at once?
Bill-the concert sounds lovely. Yay for not bringing home fruitcake.

Good morning coaches,

Food was on plan yesterday. This morning I'm going to walk with dh who invited me to join him. He walked in the rain yesterday, but I think today it will just be soggy, not really raining. There are some washes along the trail and we may have to change the route a time or two where it is flooded. Our weather was just the worst yesterday. It rained all day long and we even had thunder and lightening in the evening. It will be at least a day or two before I get out on the hiking trail. The Preserve doesn't want people to hike there when the trails are muddy cause it's not good for the trail. Dh is still feeling good today . . . yay!

I took a look at some You Tube videos about plant based eating in Thailand. Last year I wasn't yet on the plant based diet. I'm sure there are plenty of dishes, but I'm afraid it looks like some of them are higher fat for sure. It will be fun to check it out though. I will take old fashioned oats that I can cook in the microwave and buy berries and soy milk so that I at least have breakfast covered.

Curlyjax I'm so sorry about your Dad. I'm sure that is such a worry. I think you said you have a disabled brother that lives in his town. Is there anyway they could both live nearer to you? Enjoy your walk. I always feel better after being outdoors and with a friend is an added bonus.

Bill The concert sounds lovely and the fruitcake sounds even better. Next year I will have some. I think it's a little too late to find any this year. I have made the best fruitcake in the past but I don't want that much around and a lot of people don't like it.

VertOlive I don't think I knew you have six dogs. Are they all the same breed or different? We had thunder and lightening last night and our guy did not like it. He seems to be quite noise sensitive. Your harp does look beautiful and what a joy it must be to be able to play.

Maryann I'm glad you have a couple of great guys who know how to support you. I just hate being so upset that I'm crying only because it seems to be so exhausting. I hope you're better today. The aquarium sounds great. I would love to see a good aquarium again. It's nice that so many will be focused on good health. It makes it so much easier.

GardenerJoy It sounds like you had a good New Year's Eve. Congratulations on again meeting or exceeding your exercise goal.

I got my year off to a good start with some work on my novel and some thoughts and exercises for getting in tune with what I want for 2023.

I chose "DONE is better than good" for my Phrase of the Year. That's from Elizabeth Gilbert's book, Big Magic. She makes the point that most of us don't get things done to put out into the world -- either we abandon them part way through or never start in the first place. So, just getting anything to DONE is a big deal. I've been working with this phrase for years, but I still haven't fully internalized it, so I'm going to play with it in a more focused way for 2023.

Some things that I'd like to get DONE in 2023 for health and fitness -- complete this month's Yoga with Adriene's 30-day-yoga practice in real time, get my weight back down a couple of kilograms and maintain it there, and attain the ability to balance on my left foot for 30 seconds.

Exercise +50, 50/1700 minutes for December

BillBlueEyes: Our trash day is a day late this week, like last week. I just looked it up so I can be as smart as the neighbors.

Monday 1/2/23
 

Greetings,


I liked that gardnerjoy has a phrase for the New Year. I think mine will be something that diet blogs and my harp teacher have been saying all along: "Festina lente"--"Make haste slowly". If a Get It Done guy like Caesar Augustus said that, it wouldn't hurt me to try. I swear, I have Terrier DNA like my dogs and want to do everything all at once immediately!


I did get all the water down for the second day in a row and am already developing strategies to accomplish this more easily.


Today is a fasting day, my single meal comes after work around 11pm. Now that my 16 year old has graduated high school early, he wants to work for a year before making any big life decisions so he is working with me at our Athletic Club. We've been doing this for a month and have to drive together because he is on a learner's permit for driving. So far, it's been working out and he is learning "life stuff".


All the best to everyone here--onward!

Happy Evening, Coaches.

We sent DS on his way with a fancy restaurant sent off that was% of my first teaching paycheck 33 years ago. it was a lovely trip nd now I am getting ready to settle and make some goals. All the books say they must be measurable, achievable, simple and repeatable.

OK This is what I know I can do:
1. No Starbucks for a month. This habit has crept up on me in the last two months and spends calories with no positive health benefits.
2. Food is now a chess game. Food With a healthy purpose are the strongest moves, weak choices put me in danger. I let calorie/ and carb count go for the week.
3. Target 100 ounces of water.
4. Target 100 mins of movement.
5 Target Breakfast: I have four premade breakfasts each with four box checkers ( fage youghurt, gojis berries and dark chocolate blended into a crumble, 2 T. vinegar espresso and chocoalte, 2 T. Flaxseed.)
6. Target Greger: Forum premade lunches of legumes and veggies.
7. No sweets at work.

Many of these I have been doing a lot but never all in the same day. This is my week 1 check off. The measurable goal is back under 180 by Sunday.

Joy: I have been thinking of my phrase for the year. I have been toying with a quote I heard quoted by John Greene:
“As Anaïs Nin put it, “We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are.” What if this year I strove to continually stay in my own lane driving as a loved, fully licensed adult of God driving. Judgement, expectations, and pettiness are strapped in child safety seats in the back. They are the children of fear. Although I can have compassion for them, it is unsafe and unwise for them to take the wheel.

I like it. I will take picture of it to remember when faced with the cookie shrapnel of post holiday Armageddon abandoned in the staff room.

Tuesday - Leonardo da Vinci unsuccessfully tests a flying machine (1496, Tuscany)
 

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Visit from the DS, DIL, and (2.5 yo) DFGD; seems that their New Year's Day also got filled up so they came on Monday. This further contributes to my not being able to know the day of the week. We walked to a playground in the mild temperature; pushed the DFGD on the swing for the longest time. She's bossy! "Nope, I didn't teach her that; came with the package," my DIL insists. She likes to specify who pushes from behind and who pushes from in front. Her parents only insist that she ask "Please" each time and let her know that adults can say "No." Kinda fun with a little one calling, "Higher, higher." She proudly referred to the one-year-old on the next swing as a "Baby." Chatting around the kitchen table later with a cup of tea, my thing was to cut each grape in half with dramatic arm motion. It was then passed to the DFGD who stuffs both halves in her mouth. She's not allowed to have another one until that one is completely swallowed. We're all slow learners, but are all aware of her ability to stuff her pouch with some half-dozen grapes then spit them all out. Just revel in her longer and more articulate sentences.

Eating was on plan, CREDIT moi, although with extra daytime snacks. Dinner was from a huge pot of chili made with one of the vegetarian "ground meats" and the 13-bean soup mix. DW offered DS a small bowl to taste and critique. "Needs more heat; and more spices." He's family, doesn't mince words with his mom. Later at dinner with the two of us alone, we both acknowledged that the heat level was just right for us and the spice level was right up at DW's tolerance. Suspect that tolerance for heat and spice both decline with age.


Joy (gardenerjoy) - Thanks for "DONE is better than good" - I can use that. LMAO at you "can be as smart as the neighbors." I had a similar thought as I double checked that neighbors were also putting out their Christmas trees and trash containers.

maryann - Such mixed feelings to have your DS go while knowing that you're supporting him finding his life forward. Hope you weren't sending him on SouthWest Air; don't know if their problems are fully fixed yet. Many thanks for reminding us, as Anaïs Nin put it, “We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are.”

Karen (karenrn) - Congrats to you and your DH both for hiking in the rain. And Congrats for working your eating plan for Thailand.

curlyjax - Continue to wish you well finding a way to help your dad. It must be frightening to him to not know where he is. Yep, garlic bread is evil; slides down calling for more.

VertOlive - Terrific phrase "Festina lente"--"Make haste slowly". Neat that your 16 yo DS is open to learning life stuff at such a tender age.

Readers -

Very nice walk with my friend. I had a to stop a few times, I was winded and so out of shape. I indulged in half a Panera sandwich and chips and then a nap. Long discussion with DD on next steps for DS; when is it safe for him to come home.I didn't know new guidelines are if you've been exposed but don't have symptoms, wait until the 5th day after exposure. But its hard to say when the exposure actually started. Anyhow, knock on wood we don't get it. I did finally get to my dads bills but can't find the stamps, argh. Clearly I need decluttering to kick in high gear.'
A word or phrase for the New Year-I'm torn between "Let it go" as in let go of anger, irritations and past regrets of what I have or haven't done, and Nike's "Just do it" which applies to picking up, exercise and eating right. Maybe a combo of both. Gardenerjoy-thanks for the idea!
Karen- glad DH is feeling good after the walk. My brother is very settled where he is and frankly finding a group home here would be a nightmare. I could move my dad, but he still has some friends there and is with it enough part of the time, that he doesn't want to move.
Maryann- I like your quote. On my list is no sweets at work unless its a party which doesn't happen very often.
VertOlive- I'm impressed you can work while fasting, i think I would collapse:)
Bill-DFGD sounds adorable with her grapes.