[nationalparker]

Another long day at the in-laws' wrapped up! We realize we need one more dumpster for the last junk and debris. I'll call to order that on Tuesday and determine when best to drop it. We did (what now was) the next-to-last recycling metal trip with another 1,200 pounds. The formerly gruff guy has turned really helpful so that has been a bit of a relief. After that, I got to work upstairs and with no AC, the temp was easily 10 degrees hotter. I had my neck fan with me and that was a lifesaver. I stripped off bad flooring and piled that up, and cut up carpeting that was two levels high! Brought that all downstairs, along with bags of leftover debris and now the living room is about 1/3 full again. The rest will be tackled on Friday - we're taking off tomorrow and Monday and I'm relieved. After that, DH taught me how to drive one of the riding mowers and he got on the other one and we mowed the three acres. I felt like I was riding a horse wrong, bouncing up when the mower dipped. But, done and it cut the time in half for the job. We got home about an hour ago and I just claimed the first clean-up slot.

Food was OK today. I realize that I'm retaining water the days I'm working out there, I think ... weight jumps up a couple of pounds the next mornings, and I just have to suck it up and keep on. I did comfort eat a slice of toast tonight. Finding plant based butter before Thanksgiving was probably not a great find health-wise. I hadn't bought any butter in nearly a year.

Welcome, Mrs. Calypso! I'm completely with you on being challenged by the mental aspect of weight loss! I hope you enjoy this forum!

Penny - Thanks for the nod to Ina's flowering chives. I had to look it up - how beautiful!

Maryann- I hope the concert and time with DS was superb and will be great memories. I worked a championship that UCLA hosted a while back and DH joined me for a few days and we did the Griffith Observatory on an off day and thoroughly enjoyed it.

Bill - Your dinner made me think I could use the Beyond Sausage product to do the spicy Cajun red beans and rice dish that DH loves!

Joy - Thank you for the link to the recycling of the wind turbines! I read the NPR article to my DH on our drive. I hope conversation with DN was smooth enough and not aggressive or accusatory.

Karen - I hope you enjoyed the movie! We did, but I went in hoping for a super soundtrack and while not bad, I wasn't blown away. Good luck getting DH to more flicks this summer! We have an art cinema here that is the only source for us to watch The Duke, which looks very good to me. (Not John Wayne connected ) I think they're $7 Mondays and Tuesdays, so I might see if DH will go there with me on Monday. And then to Barnes & Noble.

CurlyJax - Good luck with DD's last-minute planning style. My whole career was planning and managing a lot of stuff at once and I'm not a last-minute person at all. That would drive me bonkers. Good luck with your eye!

OneByOne - I hope you are well and just busy! Looking forward to hearing how the pottery sale and judging went!

[BillBlueEyes]

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Excitement was "repairing" the overhead unit in a bathroom. The light worked sometimes. (The fan always worked letting me know that electricity was there.) The bulb tested as working when screwed in to other sockets. Finally just accepted that this old fixture just couldn't accept a new led-based bulb. Replaced it with . . . don't tell . . . an old-fashioned, incandescent bulb. The only difference that I can see that the fixture can detect is that the tip of the led-based bulb is larger and flatter. It might jiggle away from contact after repeated use of the fan. Maybe. It's the first time I've had an led-based bulb not work.

Eating was on plan with no daytime snacks, CREDIT moi. Dinner of grilled chicken was enjoyed at our kitchen table because we'd just had an afternoon burst of a half-inch of rain. Muchly desired rain. The gardener was delighted. Didn't object to being driven indoors for dinner. I ordered several things on Amazon that are predicted to arrive Monday - Memorial Day. Can't believe that's going to happen. I long for Amazon to have a button that says [Not that much of a hurry]. I was hero of the day because of the arrival of the book that I'd ordered for DW, Late Migrations: A Natural History of Love and Loss by Margaret Renkl. Apparently, plants, caterpillars, family, and grief in one collection of essays.


Joy (gardenerjoy) - Hope the visit with your DGN went well. You're one kind aunt to keep working with her. Thanks for the link to turbine blade recycling; disposal of the worn blades is high on the list of folks who claim that wind power is faulty. And also thanks for the link to your Alan Turing blog.

nationalparker – So neat that the "formerly gruff guy has turned really helpful" - with all the pounds of metal you're hauling in a bit of helpful seems warranted. Three acres is a lot of mowing; glad that you're going to take two days off.

Karen (karenrn) - So interesting that the shift in the day gives you the challenge to plan differently. Congrats for making Top Gun a family excursion.

Penny. - I, also, had to google flowering chives. They'd certainly be an attractive addition to a salad. I don't know if Beyond Meat will ever be cheaper than beef; it just lost points with me by hiring Kim Kardashian as "Chief Taste Consultant." Just doesn't compute in my brain. I still haven't figured out why I'm supposed to even know who Kim Kardashian is.

MrsCalypso - Welcome to our Beck group and welcome to 3FC. We'd be very pleased for you to join us. Starting from Day 1 is just the best - we all need the review. Seems to me that you've got a serious head start by already knowing that "wt loss is all about the mental game." We have no expectations and will support you finding your own way to participate. I do like to warn new folks to avoid trying to write too many personals at first; writing personal responses can come to feel like a burden that can hinder reporting in - the part that Dr. Judith Beck so highly recommends. Glad that you've joined us.

Readers -

Chapter 6 Stage 3 - The Challenging Situations Plan

For example, one day you may forget to prepare your snacks in advance (putting yourself at risk for snacking on unplanned foods). Another day, you might sleep late and not have time to eat breakfast slowly. Check off your Stage 3 Success Skills Sheet every night to keep yourself on track.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Complete Beck Diet for Life (Green book), Pg 128.

[gardenerjoy]

Thanks for the good thoughts for my conversation with DN. It went as well as could be expected. I'm not sure if some of the news will hit more strongly later, but when I left, she was in a good place for moving forward. She's been so alone for the last couple of weeks that, mostly, I just let her ramble about books and world events.

We sat on the ground for two and a half hours and I'm feeling it this morning, mostly in my lower back. I'm just drained this morning from too much sun, too much driving, and too much being the wisest aunt that I know how to be. Possibly my best line: "It took 60 years to get myself to this place, but I ultimately discovered that there's only one person in the world who is capable of loving me the way that I want to be loved. It's me. I'm the only person who has enough knowledge about myself to do the job."

Exercise +20, 1410/1500 minutes for May

Welcome, MrsCalypso!

BillBlueEyes: We've started using the Amazon Day Delivery option for packages we don't need right away and are kind of embarrassed to get on a Sunday or holiday. The chosen delivery day can be changed with every order, which doesn't seem to be quite what they intend, but it's close enough to function as a 'not that much of a hurry' option.

[curlyjax]

This weekend is all about prepping for the big move next weekend. I hauled some stuff around and threw some trash out, to make room for packing/organizing. In the process I also did a quick sort of my own clothes in the closet, switching over to warmer weather things. I’ve kept a few things in the hope that I will fit into them again, but was realistic with others.
DD is slowly realizing that we can’t fit all the furniture she wants to bring in her tiny bedroom, so we’re making progress with making lists. Today we will continue and I will look for things in the house that we probably already have. I’m hoping to get out for a quick walk with a friend too. I’m mad at myself for not dealing with some stuff around the house before, but realize that I definitely work faster with a deadline!
Gardenerjoy-glad the conversation with DN went well. I hear you, I can’t sit on the ground anymore.
Bill-that book looks really interesting. DW should be pleased, it definitely poured here!
Nationalparker- that sounds kind of fun to drive a riding mower! Your body must be getting stronger with all the work you’re doing.
Karen-I wish you lived near me, I would hire you to help me sort my house Do you have any at home hobbies you can get into? Eye is just at monitor stage and seems to be getting better. I suspect it is stress related. I’m also having heart burn and I’m sure that is stress related too.
Penny-I ate a lot of the farro dish too, with lots of garlic. The chives are a great idea.
Welcome Mrs. Calypso, we are indeed an active and supportive group.

[Penny.]

Good morning!

Yesterday was on plan and l'll need to claw my way through day two again.

Yesterday's activity was cutting and sewing fabric squares for the family TP. I've made five separate piles to be sewn so the family can help, all except the 11yo. She said no, and I don't feel like teaching the unwilling. My 15yo balked that I let her off too easy. It's true the baby of the family gets away with a lot.

Bill, that's funny about Kim Kardashian. Maybe the first bite wasn't a good take and that was her max for the day.

MsCalypso, welcome! Good luck with your weightloss goals!

Nationalparker, it sounds like you're getting closer to the end! Yay!

Joy, sitting on the floor is rough. I do like your wise statement, although it feels a tad lonely. It would be nice to think we could count on at least one or two people, but I know what you mean.

Curly, good luck with the organizing. It will be all done soon!

Waving at Karen. I hope the movie was good.

[maryann]

Happy Sunday!
Welcome back, Mrs Calypso.

Just drove DS to the Hollywood airport. Sad. But it was a great visit. My aging parents are doing great for 87 and 91 but there is definitely a need to Shepard them around and keep them mostly apart. They have been divorced for over 30 years. So this morning was breakfast with Dad and DS. My father wanted to sleep in the parking lot of our hotel. Who would pay $100 he says? I convinced him to let me treat him. Then he wandered around taking pictures of the breakfast buffet and business center repeating several times how luxurious it was. No smartphone, just a camera slung around his neck and a flip phone. Still hiking up to 7 miles with his retired men’s group.

Now I am taking my mother to church than back to sister’s. Food has been disastrous but I did not make myself sick or feel shame. I have taken care of my mental health in a situation that would usually throw me into a depression. Three cheers for our side.

Concert was great. DS and I sang every song.

wave to all.

[karenrn]

Good morning coaches,

Food on plan, weight pretty much the same. I got out for a 2 hour hike this morning before it got too warm. Dh and I loved the Top Gun movie yesterday and we're going out to lunch today. He can't get in the pool yet, but I'll probably get in after lunch. He doesn't have a dressing on his hip incision anymore, but showering is what he can do. I'm sure a person wouldn't want those dissolvable sutures dissolving before they should.

Maryann It sounds like a busy and fun couple of days. It's great that your parents are still healthy and active at their ages. Good thing to take care of your mental health, the food plan is a quicker fix.

Penny Glad you made it though day one again. Please tell me the fabric TP is only for number one.

Curlyjax I'm glad you are getting things done with a deadline. Maybe dd just likes an even tighter deadline. Yes I have a number of at home hobbies, I just don't really want to be at home by myself as much as I am every summer. It's what happens every summer here and more so since Covid. I'll get used to it or get out of here like I do every year. I wish I lived nearby and I would love to come over and help sort your house.

GardenerJoy Such wise advise for dn and for all of us. I can imagine how exhausting it must have been. Take care of yourself today.

Bill The books looks great I was able to borrow the e-book from the library. I'm glad you got the light fixed even though you had to use the older light bulb. Oh I do wish you could send some of that rain my way.

GardenerJoy I love the picture in my mind of you and dh each on a riding lawnmower getting the lawn mowed. I'm so glad it is getting closer to the end of that big job. I can not even imagine.

Welcome Mrs Calypso. For sure the mental part is the most difficult part of weight loss. One of the reasons I like our group so much is that although we have different eating plans we all have the mental challenges that the Beck Diet for Life helps with. I'm sure I've been on at least half a dozen different food plans since joining this group.

[nationalparker]

Not the best eating day, and I triggered it all MYSELF by getting on the scale when I KNEW it would be up several pounds from working so hard the past two days, despite the food being ok. So then I went into, "Oh Well" mindset and not the Beck kind. I stayed busy all day, though, so wasn't doing any boredom eating. Little positive to report and now just feel bloated and bleh.

Our weather could not have been better, one of the most beautiful Memorial Day weekends I can remember. Firecrackers are going off and it's still light out *which I always think is a waste of money, but I'm glad it's fireworks and not gunshots this time) - our dark doesn't fall until 10 p.m. in mid-June and we're edging closer to that.

CurlyJax - One side of us stopping eating dairy or meats was heartburn was eliminated nearly overnight. DH had it for a long while and I'd just started getting it now and then. I wonder if anyone else here who went plant based had ever had it before but not now? Like you, I think I had it from stress/foods.

[MrsCalypso]

My new coaches! Thank you so much for the warm welcome. I appreciate Bill's advice to limit personal responses at first. I'm just going to focus on getting started.

Yesterday I followed Day 1 and wrote my Advantages Card, which I did as a note in my phone. I have reviewed it today.

Today, is Day 2. I already have a basic food plan in place, Mediterranean with no/very little processed foods or refined grains and caution with dairy and sweets. I don't have a back up plan at this point.

My goal is to avoid emotional eating, overeating, and foods that cause blood sugar spikes and drops that lead to cravings.

[BillBlueEyes]

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Eating was on plan with no daytime snacks, CREDIT moi. Dinner happened on the patio in the cool evening. It was the second dip into our dish "burger, beans, and rice." The burger still met my needs to taste like hamburger even though it was composed of pea-based protein. I did have to work to keep the image of Kim Kardashian out of my mind. A special treat of leftovers is that kitchen cleanup is easy.

Resistance exercise was removing the bag of mulch from the trunk of DW's car to place it in the spot in the basement from which she doles it out. I'm comfortable carrying a 40-pound bag over my shoulder, but not comfortable opening doors and gates at the same time. DW had to run interference. The alternative was to use the two-wheel cart which would could sit while I opened doors and gates myself. Not as macho!

The real excitement was resolving that we agreed to have BBQ for dinner tonight. For us, that means takeout from our favorite BBQ place. Glitch in the system: they expect to be so swamped today that wait times are predicted to be very long. Solution: We ordered and picked up our half-rack of short ribs yesterday in the bright sunshine when their business was low and pickup almost immediate. Dinner happily sits in our fridge to be warmed this evening. BBQ reheats well. I'm already drooling.


Joy (gardenerjoy) - Kudos for being a good aunt, and Super Congrats for being able to sit on the ground for two and a half hours. Keep being reminded that finding a path through life is just a lot harder for some. Thanks for the reminder that Amazon Day Delivery can be used sort of like a [Not that much of a hurry] button. I'm now curious to try that for the next time that we have a handful of packages in the works.

maryann - So neat that your Dad came in to have breakfast with you and his DGS. Sounds like he's doing OK - Crotchety is earned at his age. Kudos for making your mental health your first priority. I share the thought, "Three cheers for our side."

nationalparker – So good that you actually gave yourself a day off from the house resurrection. LOL at being annoyed that fireworks are going off while it's still daylight. New Year's Eve does have an advantage there.

Karen (karenrn) - I continue to be impressed at the speed of your DH's recovery. Kudos to you for being able to keep him out of the pool.

curlyjax - Congrats for a productive day. Good news that your DD is getting more realistic about what will fit in her Boston apartment. Upping and Downing the stairs in Boston with a non-fitting piece of furniture would be the pits.

Penny. - Neat that you're training your whole gang to sew. It's still on my Bucket List to get comfortable with minor tasks on a sewing machine.

MrsCalypso - Kudos for charging ahead with your Advantages Card and then reviewing it. Just marching forward, you are. Neat that you're aware that there are foods that cause you cravings.

Readers -

Chapter 6 Stage 3 - The Challenging Situations Plan

Summary of Challenging Situation Skills

Jot down this list of skills in your Diet Notebook under the heading "Challenging Situation Skills" so you can easily refer to it in the future. You will learn more about these skills and review this list many time in Stage 3. . . .

Before the Event:
1. Change your mindset.
2. Consult your Memory Box.
3 Develop an eating plan.
4. Review your Advantages Deck.
5. Create new and review old Response Cards.
6. Imagine the aftermath.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Complete Beck Diet for Life (Green book), Pg 128.

[gardenerjoy]

We're observing Memorial Day with spaghetti and meatballs. I'll declare it to honor the 92nd Infantry Division of WWII, black soldiers in the segregated US army who fought in the Italian campaign in 1944 and 1945. Over 700 of them didn't return home. My book group read Miracle at St. Anna by James McBride, historical fiction about the 92nd Infantry Division, about a decade ago. It's been made into a film, too.

It took us a while, but we now have a recipe for turkey meatballs in tomato sauce that we really like. It's way too much sauce for the number of meatballs, but DH discovered that he likes extra sauce in the fridge to make mini pizzas for a snack. So, it all works out for us. We serve it with a small portion of linguini and a big portion of roast broccoli.

Exercise +35, 1445/1500 minutes for May

[curlyjax]

I didn't get that much done yesterday but I did sort through some more things. DD has had boxes of stuff from her freshmen year lying around in my tv room, so i'm seeing what she has and trying to organize things into categories like bathroom etc. I'm not sure how much communicating there has been between herself and the two roommates as far as setting up wifi etc but they need to figure that out too. I'm so glad to have a non stressful job at times like this, I'm going to be very busy this week. Eating hasn't been great but not terrible either. I ended up eating ice cream with my friend instead of a walk- we sat in the shade with camp chairs and had a very nice chat. We agreed we both want to go to Italy someday and we could go on a group tour together- maybe a 3 year goal from now, depending what's going on in our kids lives.
Nationalparker- that's interesting about the heartburn. I know mine is stress related, and the omeprazole i'm taking seems to be working.

[MrsCalypso]

Good morning, Coaches. Thanks for the supportive words as I get started here.

Today is Day 3 , commit to eating sitting down. I need no convincing. I actually started this in earnest yesterday (I read ahead). I know looking at a meal in front of me, I can generally tell, when in a calm state, how much is going to be a good amount of food.
'
If I:
1. Put the rest of the food away, if I'm the only one eating
2. Sit and really look at the meal I am about to eat and take in and enjoy how it looks
Then:
It's much more peaceful to complete the meal and calmly be satisfied with the meal


I think I'm going to skip ahead a day, since I really didn't need a day to consider a meal plan and I read ahead.

Day 4 Give yourself credit

This is an area of particular struggle for me. I have picked up a perfectionist bent, and come from a Protestant German American background. I married into an even more culturally bound Protestant German American family. In DH's family, "SPS" stands for "Self Praise Stinks" and is a common reminder not to congratulate ones self. Part of this is the idea that we are taking credit for something that G-d deserves credit for, not us. Pretty heavy-duty, let me tell ya!

Lately, I have been struggling with feeling like a failure across many areas of my life! It makes no sense. I'm really not prone to self-pity or negativity, and while I have ADD and some depressive traits, symptoms have been at tolerable levels for many years. In recent months, however, this kind of morose self-loathing thinking has become more of a problem.

So, Beck is saying that we need to give ourselves credit. Maybe that's why Bill's posts say CREDIT moi so regularly? As a reminder?

I know this self-loathing mindset is not healthy, but I'm scared of being less hard on myself, too. I'll probably stay her today and tomorrow and really give it some thought.

[maryann]

Good Morning, Coaches.

Just got back from a many hour drive home. Weight is higher than it has been in twenty years. Boo! I will start my five day Prolon fast tomorrow. Last week is always pretty miserable at school so I might as well get all the miserable stuff in at once.

I am just going to rest today. I'll get to school early tomorrow to plan final reviews.

I ordered two different kinds of amphibian water shoes for my trip. Hopefully my big toes ( one with a toe nail missing and one with the ingrown surgery still healing) will be ready to take them.

Wave to all.

[karenrn]

Good afternoon coaches,

Food is on plan and weight is the same. I thought sure I would be down a bit today, but I wasn't so good with drinking my water yesterday. Who knows if that might be why, but I'm trying to get it all in today. I woke up way too early today so I've kind of switched meal times a bit and took a nap. I had breakfast at 4 to be at the trailhead at 5 and then ended up eating lunch at 9:30 and a rest/nap after that. Instead of having a morning stack I had a noon snack. I have a new YouTube I watched called Nutrition Made Simple. I can't remember his name, but he is an MD and PhD. He leans more plant based, but I was mainly watching the ones on lowering cholesterol.

The yard guys just left so I'm heading out to the pool. Personals tomorrow.