Got through the evening with DH's family. Drama was all around. I stayed back and quieter than normal and let DH step forward a bit - a different role for him. Often he doesn't even answer the door (which bugs me). Today he decided he HAD to run an errand around the time they were arriving. I got irritated and he swore he'd be back in time. His folks pulled up before he did, but he drove up soon after. I don't see these girls ever having any ambition to do anything well.
Food was OP until dinner - I ordered well for my dinner but had a yeast roll at dinner and cinnamon coffee cake for dessert back at home. Also some frosted sugar cookie kettle corn that I'd bought before Christmas to use if we'd had them over then. Get it all over at once, I guess.
Bill - I haven't said it in a while, but thank you for putting a day in history on each of your posts. I really enjoy those.
Scale dipped a bit to 268.6. we'll see what it says tomorrow. Happy the numbers are going down.
Followed my food plan today ingredient wise but ate past full this morning. Disappointed I did that but it was the right food , I just want to keep following what my body says is enough vs. my emotionally needy brain. Credit for self correcting.
I didn't hear from my sister today so I will reach out to her tomorrow. Not worried. I think she is assessing her life right now. But I'll make sure to check in tomorrow.
Tomorrow I am firing the kiln with the commemorative plate I was asked to make in it. I have to go early to make sure the firing is complete before I head off to ukulele class!!! Today I picked up a digital tuner. No idea how that works! Yay for learning something new!
Sunday - RIP Queen Victoria, after 63 years (1901, London)
Diet Coaches/Buddies – Walk, CREDIT moi, was uber non-aerobic since I was jammed between some 175,000 other folks also taking a walk. The sun was bright and the atmosphere joyous and supportive. I've never been on the subway when it was so jammed packed.
Eating sanely had to work around being out during the middle of the day. I had gorp as a survival food which I ate in moderation. I picked up the cherry tomatoes on the way home and made a grand salad for the evening potluck. My new thing is to add fewer ingredients in my salads - I'm too ready to throw in everything that I think is good and mix up all the tastes.
onebyone – The classic battle succinctly stated, "want to keep following what my body says is enough vs. my emotionally needy brain." Congrats for constantly moving into new stuff.
Nature Girl – Kudos for "I have a plan for today and I’m eager to stay on it." Good luck moving into a new phone. I'm six months into mine and still feel like a visitor.
maryann - What a double-sided gift, "All my classes are eager and attentive." [Love being reminded of Beverlyjoy - so many wise posts.]
nationalparker – Kudos for keeping your cool at the family gathering. [Thanks for noting the daily history post. They help me get the timeline of history ordered in my brain.]
Karen (karenrn) - Hidden Figures is on my list. LOL at picking up Otis to get past loud ground crews.
Readers -
Quote:
Chapter 9 Psychological Traps
Reflect and Recommit:
Why I Want to Escape This Trap
You have a choice: you can keep allowing these psychological issues to get in the way or you can use the strategies in this chapter to address sabotaging thoughts.
. . .
If you feel burdened, ask yourself which burden you want: the burden of controlling your eating (but just think of the payoff!) or the many burdens of being overweight?
If you feel a lack of willpower, remember how you were able to persevere in the past when you had an important goal.
If you feel apathetic, remind yourself that you will very soon care greatly if you give in and overeat.
Working on psychological traps will help you plow through the difficult times and keep your motivation steady. Take a few minutes to write one final summary reminder card to help motivate you to make changes now and in the future.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., Deborah Beck Busis, The Diet Trap Solution, Train Your Brain to Lose Weight and Keep It Off for Good (Blue book), pg. 196
I am sitting outside posting from my phone. It's dark and cold. I have a three day run at work and then we leave on our trip right afterwards. I spent yesterday taking care of household chores then drove to Denver to Chevrolet because they didn't have one of my windshield wipers up here. I've started packing this morning my brain seems to want to think about that now. I'm packing a small bag to bring into the hotel our first night which includes done dishes and food, and a sheet for the bed. LOL. Alot to think about traveling with the doggies. The only food I'm going to bring from here is for my smoothies. Everything else we will pick it up at whole foods in Santa Fe. I sure am looking forward to this!
Food has been OP, excepting for Friday night when I spontaneously ate cookies at an AA meeting. Ouch. I seriously modified my evening snacks afterwards. Credit. I am going to rethink that situation. I only attend that meeting once every three weeks and I don't see cookies any other time. Perhaps it would be better to plan for two instead of gobbling five. Fortunately, I don't have to make that decision right now. We have meals and snacks planned for our trip, mostly. Fortunately, my sister and my friend both eat healthy so I am with good company.
Bill, a very good Beck posted this morning. Thank you. I got a chuckle out of your standard Sunday walk which included 300,000 other people.
I also think of Beverlyjoy often. She had a story of her grandson's dorm room being robbed during daytime hours because the door was unlocked. I keep my doors locked all the time now. I didn't used to before. even if I'm coming in for two minutes it doesn't hurt. To me, it's a great example of how Beck strategies once practiced become habit.
Take care everyone. My time is coming quickly to head out for work. I still need to dress and pack my lunch box. I may not get back here until after my trip. I will be reading and thinking of you all.
Food continues to be sloppy - right foods, wrong portions. I also had the scale gain that is inevitable for starting pilates. I always shake my fist at the unjust world that penalizes for exercise. Nonetheless I persevere. Exercise is the real solution for mood swings and confidence.
Woke up a little anxious. I decided I will start my school work immediately after posting and then take a break. That is better than dreading it for another few hours. Walk outside late. We have had constant storms so outside will be nice. I have planned a ski trip this weekend. It is so important I keep getting out there. I know it is something that will fall by the wayside if I don't keep practicing.
Happy trip Lexxiss. You deserve it. nationalparker: Credit for surviving family with grace and dignity. BBE: Credit for electing to be a salad thereby knowing there will be a salad. KarenRn: Three cheers for Otis' progressing. onebyone: Glad you are holding onto the food plan.
I'm sitting in a parking lot typing this to you guys. I'm an hour early to my ukulele class! Wow. I am never early but I wondered why, if I was late (it was a bit after two) I could still get parking in the driveway. Anyway we both just laughed and I get a chance to post. Oh well!
Food today has been ok. I had an early start as I fired the kiln which was done, in what seemed to be, record time. While there I took pictures of small paintings I want to sell online in my Spring Clearance Sale. Not sure if I'll put them on eBay or Etsy. But, I have good images now and when I get home I will edit them.
So I ate this morning and ate a low carb bun I made the other day before I left. I have water with me. When I get home my meal is planned and I have food for the week, though I must write things out. This past week I haven't done that and I think I have suffered for it. There was a definite difference between my first week where I towed the line to the letter, and this past week where I winged it and coasted a bit and just followed my own path as I felt like "I had this". Next week, week 3, I will tow the line again. My first group meeting will be this coming Friday. I'm looking forward to meeting people and learning more about the program and seeing what kind do results people are having.
I also feel like adding in some exercise. Possibly some swimming. Where I teach there is a wonderful pool. I meant to see if there are any staff discounts for the facilities there. I think I might send off an email about that right now.
I had my greeter duty at Tom's Thumb this morning. It was cold, but not windy and there were lots of people out for a hike, so the time went fast and I enjoyed it. I've just gotten home from taking Otis out for a walk. He was pretty slow to get started, in fact I carried him past the first house and then he decided to go. I want him to be just a little tired for class so he's not too rambunctious.
I went out to dinner with dh and a couple of friends to the local tavern. There really are no good choices but to keep the portions small, which I didn't do. Today is much better so far.
Maryann I just hate that about exercise too. Whenever I kick it into gear I gain some water weight. Luckily it doesn't continue up and up.
Lexxiss Your trip sounds very fun. I love a good road trip. I didn't know BeverlyJoy, but I sure remember Meg maybe from Maintainers Forum. Does anyone know what happened to her?
[B]Bill[B] It sounds like there were successful peaceful marches all over the world. Probably not aerobic, but very uplifting.
Onebyone How are the ukelele lessons going? It seems to be so popular right now. My sil got one for Christmas and friend Carrie also recently purchased one. I love that ukulele rendition of Somewhere Over the Rainbow.
Nationalparker Good for you for stepping back and dh stepping it up a bit with his family. They are his family after all. I'm saying that because I always seem to be the one who takes more time with dh's family than he does. Each week we call his Mom and he hands the phone off to me as soon as possible saying he can't think of anything to say. What can I say but that he is still in training.
Okay, out the door to buy dog food and then training class.
Need to remember that a few "off" choices today do not fail the whole day, but right now - it seems that's all I can think of - a small square of leftover coffee cake from last night and too many tortilla chips with my chicken tortilla soup, pico and guac tonight. I spent much of the day in food prep - the soup, pasta sauce for the turkey meatballs, steel cut oatmeal, roasted veggies with lunch, cutting cantaloupe, etc. but we start the workweek with a full fridge ready to go. I wanted to do up a pan of cinnamon apples for the oatmeal - just now remembered that - dishes are done and kitchen is all cleaned up, but I guess it won't kill me
Karen - I think this visit I resented that I'm always the conversation facilitator, admirer, photo-looker-at-er, sympathetic ear, etc. and this time I just pulled back. Thanks for not thinking me a wretch. I felt bad and DH asked me in whispers in another room, what's wrong? You're so quiet!
Bill - Three bulbs of garlic would last me probably a bit more than a month. I wanted to bring home the wonderful, large sweet garlic from Italy but DH said not allowed through customs. I'd not thought of that. Phooey. It's hard to get close to true Italian on some dishes with stronger garlic. I told DH that might be something I try to grow from Burpee and see if I can tell a taste difference, because I can't find that in our markets.
Lexxiss - Good luck getting all done you need to in the countdown for your trip ... like that you packed when your brain was "on it" ... smart!
Despite our warm temps today, I didn't get out and enjoy it - just seemed to be standing in the kitchen most of the day. Tomorrow at lunch, though, might be an option.
Monday - Elizabeth Blackwell becomes 1st U.S. woman M.D. (1849, New York)
Diet Coaches/Buddies – Standard Sunday walk with DW, CREDIT moi. It included stopping by a curbside mini-library where we found a book about marriage written by a couple that we know but didn't know that they had written such a book. What we don't know about folks just boggles the mind.
Dinner was a potluck at an event. I had one plate, CREDIT moi, but had more from the dessert table than I had planned. One woman brought a plate of cookies about which she knew I was particularly fond. I could have resisted more, but I was kinda busy sneaking peeks at my cell phone for the score of the New England Patriots football game. We'll be at Super Bowl LI in two weeks against Atlanta. With all the hate going around, it's almost refreshing to be hated because some folks just can't stand our football team.
onebyone – Neat to go looking for a pool to get in some swimming.
Debbie (Lexxiss) – This is the notion that I needed last night, "better to plan for two instead of gobbling five."
maryann - Seems that you always get here, "Nonetheless I persevere."
nationalparker – Kudos for all that food prep to begin the week. [LOL at the thought of you getting arresting for smuggling Italian Sweet Garlic.]
Karen (karenrn) - Love the notion of trying to get Otis to be less rambunctious for his class.
Readers -
Quote:
Chapter 9 Psychological Traps
Getting Off Track Traps
Almost every dieter who has had trouble losing weight or maintaining a weight loss has had a specific kind of sabotaging thought after eating off plan, something like this: "I've blown it. I might as well give up, eat whatever I want for the rest of the day, and start again tomorrow."
But just think: What if, every single time in the past you had made a mistake with your eating, you had immediately recovered and gotten right back on track? What if you had automatically said to yourself, "Oh, no big deal," and continued to eat in a normal controlled way? Wouldn't you be much better off now?
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., Deborah Beck Busis, The Diet Trap Solution, Train Your Brain to Lose Weight and Keep It Off for Good (Blue book), pg. 197
Phone checkin. Nice day with boys. Credit for restraint when sermon was on a topic that splinters me from the herd. Rather than venting anger this time, I held my boys hands and prayed. The church has had persecution policies for hundreds of years and yet The message of love remains. There is always the possibility of change. Maybe I'll be around when it happens. Maybe I'm wrong. I'll pray for love and understanding.
Credit for not eating over the emotion.
Food is made. PT in the city today - never pleasant but I'm grateful for the help.
I hate to say it but I'm glad it's Monday. I'm hoping for a good reset day. The past few days have started out just fine, but by the end of the day I'm over what I should have eaten. I chose a lower calorie breakfast this morning, hoping to leave more calories for later in the day. It's going to be a rainy day today so I'll get out for a few walks with Otis between showers and get the ironing caught up and the vacuuming. I will admit it is harder to stay on plan when I'm home so much.
The puppy training class yesterday ended up being a no go. The other dogs were much older, bigger and louder. Otis was terrified. We spoke to the trainer and now have some private lessons set up. We'll have to work on the socialization part on our own. Dh is even more protective than I am, so we were in total agreement, especially since Otis had a death grip on his arm when the dogs started barking.
Maryann I hope the week gets off to a good start for you. This week will finish my PT for my shoulder. I've been tempted to have dh check my back for bruises where she does some myofacial something that about kills me. I hope it is helping cause it sure does hurt.
Bill Congrats on your football team's win. I've almost been glad to have some football to focus on.
Nationalparker Family, what can I say. Our niece and her husband are coming down and my brother and his wife at the same time. Now I think our nephew is also coming. Whoo boy! What I'd like to say; but it's just as much my brother and sister in laws fault as it is theirs. More of the feast or famine and yes it's me that shuttles them around, cooks the food, whatever. We both paste on the smiley face, but sometimes it gets a little hard being the free hotel in the sun.
Onebyone I need to tow the line too. Let's start today.
Well I guess it's time to pull out the ironing board and get the basket of ironing done. Glad I don't mind doing it.
Scale bounced up again today: 271. It likes 271. Maybe it is an easy configuration for the electronic readout to show in that little window or something. I will think of it that way as I know it is fluid retention.
I'm going to do myself a favour and change the Official Weigh-In days to Tuesday. Realistically, the weekend is where DH and I may have a bit more of something during dinner, which is ok on my foodplan but the scale goes up. Mondays are a fast day, unless it's a heavy activity day, so whatever I weigh on a Tuesday morning is more likely closer to my true weight.
I hereby declare Tuesdays, in the a.m., Official Weigh-in Day
I am pondering this from BBE's Beck excerpt this morning. It's as if I've never heard or read this before...
Quote:
What if, every single time in the past you had made a mistake with your eating, you had immediately recovered and gotten right back on track? What if you had automatically said to yourself, "Oh, no big deal," and continued to eat in a normal controlled way? Wouldn't you be much better off now?
"...made a mistake with my eating" I think that's the line that caught my attention. You know, people always say "everybody makes mistakes ... we all make mistakes... it's just a mistake, it's ok, move on". I guess this is sticking because I feel like I made a mistake by eating too many carby things yesterday and eating too much of them and not planning on paper (which I still need to do for today and this week) and I knew I shouldn't do all the time I *was* doing it.
So how do you handle such willful, determined, self-sabotage ?
Beck's statement tells me this isn't an extraordinary event. I'm not flawed or damaged beyond repair or determined to fail. I am normal, and human, and I will make eating mistakes, even when I know what is right I may still do what is right for some reasons and wrong for others. One meal doesn't destroy EVERYTHING as my emotional mind wants to put it. I can self-correct. My foodplan shows me how to compensate for heavier meals one day (eat lighter on others, or a few others) and look at the big picture.
I need to expect these ups and downs. I do not need to attach my self-identity to any "mistake". What is more helpful is to know it is not a fatal mistake that ends everything, all my good planning, but is an opportunity to practice recovery and to get back on track and by truly flexing that resistance muscle by resisting to throw it all away.
I know this and yet I don't. Such a basic thing. Am I allowed to make mistakes? Of course. Seems I need to believe it at a deeper level than I actually do. Time to add that to a Beck card.
Back on the eating plan today - carb heavy day. All meals/snacks according to plan. Ordered a slow-cooker that will actually fit in a meal for two, and it arrived today. Dinner plan for tomorrow is chicken arrabbiata - all ingredients on hand. We'll see how it comes out. I love the excitement of a new recipe, but then feel like a failure when it's mediocre. On our Air France flight, one of the dishes was an orange infused lentil salad (not lettuce, just lentils, peppers, onions, cranberries, etc.) I've not had any luck finding a recipe for it, but will try to wing it this weekend, I think.
Cold weather returned, along with brisk winds. A rude awakening that it IS still January. Phooey. One workday down ... four to go. This might be a long week.
Bill - Yes, congrats to you on the Pats advancing to the Super Bowl. Now keep a close eye on the inflation level of those pigskins. Been there... (just sayin'. of course, I doubt the outcome would have been different that year for the Colts.)
Diet Coaches/Buddies – The gates on top of both flights of stairs are installed in preparation for the DGD visit tomorrow - all done by DW, our master craftsman. They make the narrow second floor hallway look like a prison, LOL.
I've ordered the books that I need for next semester's courses. In twelve weeks, I'll learn the history of the Middle East. I'm psyched; I know so little and get dazzled each time it's explained why coexistence and reconciliation is not possible. I caught up on some reading on a dreary day here. I can hear rain outside as I type now. Local gardeners will be pleased.
onebyone – Thanks for "One meal doesn't destroy EVERYTHING as my emotional mind wants to put it. I can self-correct."
maryann - Kudos for being able to rise above a sermon to think "love and understanding."
nationalparker – Had to google chicken arrabbiata to learn that it means angry birds. Kudos for ordering a slow cooker to help with meal planning.
Karen (karenrn) - Interesting that Otis is challenged to socialize with older, louder dogs. Congrats for the mentality of not minding to do the ironing.
Readers -
Quote:
Chapter 9 Psychological Traps
Getting Off Track Traps
Making a mistake can derail you for a day, a week, or even a year, but it doesn't have to. Once you learn to see a mistake in eating as just that - a mistake and not a license to eat wholly out of control - it will become much easier to get right back on track.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., Deborah Beck Busis, The Diet Trap Solution, Train Your Brain to Lose Weight and Keep It Off for Good (Blue book), pg. 197
Nationalparker: I'm a big appliance girl. My rice cooker will be steaming away while my new pressure cooker is hissing with vitamixed reconstituted dried tomatoes for chili. I'm the mad scientist😀
I hear Karen and onebyone. I have slipped back to maintenance. It is insidious. Change means strengthening my resistance muscles and going to bed hungry sometimes. That is the bottom line.
Fun day is AP. The reading was so complicated I told the kids I had no idea what it meant and had no answer key. I told them we'll use our tools together to dissect it. The other teacher just bailed on it. I wonder how many times they have heard a teacher admit she has no idea. Nabokov "what a good reader is" is going down😀
Short note
Sunday - RIP Queen Victoria, after 63 years (1901, London)
I think Mondays are my Saturdays
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