Beck Diet For Life/Solution – March 2015 – Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach - Page 9 - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community


Beck Diet Solution A step-by-step program to learn specific techniques to stay on our diet, lose weight, and maintain our weight loss for life.

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Old 03-15-2015, 05:28 AM   #121  
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Thumbs up Sunday - Ides of March (R.I.P. Julius Caesar, 44 B.C.)

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Technically, eating was on plan and deserves a CREDIT moi - technically. Dinner was indeed planned and has been since Christmas. The plan was a seven course tasting menu at an upscale restaurant. It started with an amuse–bouche: Brussel sprouts grilled with maple syrup and spices. Actually Brussel sprout since it was, at most, 3/4 of one. Each dish was smaller than a tapas. All of us left the restaurant satisfied, not stuffed and not even full. The seven courses included three salads, a soup, a tiny pasta with super good ham bits, salmon, and finally a thin slice of superbly rare lamb. Sorbet followed, then the dessert. Then came complimentary kettle corn with the check. Terrific bread was served with butter infused with mustard seed. It was close to within bounds for my plan. I wish more restaurants served such tiny courses so that rich foods could be enjoyed without getting stuffed. On-line reviews include those stating that they had to go out to eat afterward because it was only seven bites.

It rained all day; exercise was inside puttering about. I got more paperwork done on my taxes.


Joy (gardenerjoy) – I wish more places were food-free.

Debbie (Lexxiss) – Yay for accepting imperfection.

maryann - Relaxing shopping is an oxymoron, LOL. Joy to read, "it has given me peace."

nationalparker – Kudos for "dinner was light and healthy" from a guy whose dinner was neither, LOL.

Violette_R - Love the automatically terminated meeting. My experience is that the key issue is resolved in a meeting in the last minutes regardless of how long it lasts. Returning to Week 4 (or Week 3) is a superb way to deal with disappointment - Kudos.

p.a. - We seemed to have had the same exercise day, LOL.

Ani (dailypractice) - Yep, we serve as Diet Coach/Buddy to each other as a group and invite you to do the same. Neat that the Beck Strategies worked for you three years ago - a good omen that they'll work again. Glad that you've joined us.

Readers -
Quote:
day 33 Eliminate Emotional Eating

How to Calm Down

There is nothing wrong with having negative emotions. They're just nature's way of telling us there's a problem. Do you think that you can't tolerate negative emotions? You can! Of course, you don't like feeling upset. But negative emotions aren't dangerous. Nothing bad will happen to you. You won't fall apart. Given enough time, negative emotions - just like cravings - will subside on their own. You don't have to eat. A negative emotion is not an emergency.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 227.
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Old 03-15-2015, 07:50 AM   #122  
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Thumbs up Beginning Again

Bill (and coaches/buddies) - Thanks for the warm welcome. You ask how I found Beck and 3FC.

Beck: I happened upon the book (pink) at the library 3 years ago and found it to be very effective. I've checked it out many times since. THIS time, for this "restart", I decided to order the book off Amazon for a penny so now I OWN the book. In the same way I own the reality that this process of "restarting" will be a LIFELONG process I'm PRIVILEGED to be engaged in.

3FC: I found this forum by googling, delighted to have found such an active group inspired and informed by CBT. It's been disheartening and lonely to tell dieting friends about Beck and to not have found even one person interested in adopting it. Beck gets put in a category of "diet's", when it ISN'T a diet. It's more like a daily visit with a very helpful therapist. LOL.

Thanks all. I look forward to getting to know you all.

Ani

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Old 03-15-2015, 09:35 AM   #123  
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My spring tree allergies have kicked in. Hard to tell if they are better or worse than last year (I was hoping for better since I've been taking allergy shots for a few months). My major symptom is malaise and my best and most direct treatment is to pretend it doesn't exist. But, I also need to take a step back once in a while to remind myself that when I'm not achieving all that I want it's because I don't have the energy, not because I'm fundamentally flawed or that I don't want it enough or that everyone I know is out to get me.

WI: -0.25 kg (new low), Exercise: +55 620/1300 minutes for March, Food: 90% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

Welcome, dailypractice! Love this description:"like a daily visit with a very helpful therapist" -- that's exactly what it's like!

BillBlueEyes: I forgot to mention that at my meeting the other night (the first of a series of 10), we voted on whether or not to have snacks at each meeting. Most people didn't have much of an opinion, but there was a strong cadre of folks who had a definite preference for no snacks. We won, not because we were numerous, but because we were committed. I know at least one other person was a recovering overeater. It made me feel like we could change the world, one meeting at a time.
Your supper sounds wonderful! In recent years, I've come to really love doing something like that a couple of times a year.
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Old 03-15-2015, 10:06 AM   #124  
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Default pass on by

Coaches

I am supposed to be helping SIL with the cleaning out of her father's place today but haven't heard from her so.... I am not pushing it. Is this mean? Insensitive? Uncaring of me? This morning I think not. I will help but she will have to ask for help from me today. I can't offer. I am exhausted. I have had an injured thumb for a few weeks now and yesterday it was acting up/in pain as I took notes at a regional writer's group meeting. That was disturbing. And I have begun to do the bodyscan meditations (recommended by Ceejay-thanks Ceejay) and the thumb is cranky. It wants to rest. In fact my hands are tired! Tomorrow is a big work day and Tuesday is a playday with a lot of walking built in as we visit the Basquiat exhibit downtown. All this to justify not wanting to help clean out a deceased person's home.

I'm not going to eat over this but it's exactly the kind of thing I would eat oveer-indecision/guilt/concern. Perfect set-up. Not a solution. Me eating over this will not make that house clean If eating did that my own place would be spotless.

Bye for now.

UPDATE: just made my green juice - 2 servings (drinking my kale!) and texted my SIL. DH said he'd come help too so that made up my mind.

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Old 03-15-2015, 12:07 PM   #125  
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Good Morning, Coaches. This has been a very nice long weekend. I continued to spruce up my spring wardrobe. I have been following Project 333 for sometime now and through donation, weeding and thoughtful purchase have made a 100% fitting and becoming wardrobe of 50 pieces (with a triumphant move away from my perfectionism, I allow myself the extra 17 pieces).

I have most of the day to myself before the boys come home and I planned to do several healthy, low tech and budget minded activities in the hopes of slowing life down a little- less efficient more mindful:

I am currently using the bread maker with wheat my husband grew ( wow, not bad for a girl who grew up in Malibu). Making the bread means I don't have to go to the store.

I will try walking to my gym with my fitbit to do my Pilates routine. I realize how tied I am to my car. What would it be like to not get in the car on days I don't work?

I will read my newly ordered Ireland book to prep for our trip next March.

I have gone through my pantry and put out two cans of artichokes, 1 can of tune, 1 box of organic cranberries. These have been in residence in the cupboard wayyyyy too long and I am committed to using them up this week. Fun to plan the recipes.

I realize that to get to my 2015 goals of under 154 and with six months of expenses in the bank, I have to be radically different. Dave Ramsey says, "I have to live like no one else in order to eventually live like no one else." I agree. Over 65% of us in America are overweight and I bet the same percentage is in debt. It must take a radical change in perspective to change those two things. This morning I am thinking out of the box.

Weight is a pound above ticker. I need to get moving if I am going to get into the 150s by the end of March.

dailypractice: Welcome. I am also impressed with this blog even after four years. Contributors are remarkably high on acceptance and encouragement and low on prescriptive and judgemental.

nationalparker: it is that last 20% that makes a maintenance diet, isn't it? I have proved to myself daily that a full stomach means no weight loss.

BBE: What a wonderful experience! I would love to have restaurants around here that offered foodie fair instead of microwaved, chain restaurant junk.

gardenerjoy: You have reminded me to put "no allergies" on my gratitude list. I don't know how I have escaped. I am in a notoriously horrible area (orchards) and many around me suffer terribly.

onebyone: Thanks for reminding me about bodyscan. Where did you get it? What was the official "buy" title.

Last edited by maryann; 03-15-2015 at 12:29 PM.
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Old 03-15-2015, 04:03 PM   #126  
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hey coaches!
i have been using a different laptop for a few days that did a systems upgrade and now this forum looks very different. I can't see anyones avatar or ticker on the side, and i don't see anywhere to sign in. Why does computer stuff have to change constantly!! this was updated to yosemite on the mac and you can't take it off and go back to the lower operating system, i wish i could for many reasons!!

anyhow- so i've been reading at least! not much going on-i continue with weight lifting at the gym but less frequently, and it will come to a grinding halt soon, what with DD starting a daily spring sport at the high school and me needing to pick her up, juggling the timing would be tight (plus she's been the one to push me to go!). I am glad for her that she is doing this, but it is going to throw a big curveball into planning/making dinner. the pick up time seems open ended, which is the difficulty- if i knew it was promptly at 5:00 that would be one thing. I know i have been lucky not having to do this until now, but everyday is a lot!

It throws a bit of a wrench into planning healthy food/dinners that are quick- i will have to put some thought into this.

Anyhow, that is my exciting life!
welcome to newbies, and waves to all- i will get back to personals but there is too much to catch up on now.

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Old 03-15-2015, 05:57 PM   #127  
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Welcome, Ani! Sorry to have missed your join post yesterday. I think I started mine early evening and then added to it and uploaded without refreshing!

With the influx of new members, I need to get off my duff and get back to the basics here. Redid my list of reasons to lose and while it's not much different than others - some of the same appear this time that I'd achieved in 2014 (notably the white skirt and the zip off hiking pants - neither of which are worn all the time but are apparently key ones for me).

Major miscommunication with DH last night - odd. He got up from the dinner table and said, "Oh, I brought you something that you might want." It was a flyer from his work for WW membership up to 50% off for employees and families. I looked at it and looked at him and asked, "Were you joining?" (thinking we were doing it together...) "No. I thought YOU wanted it." I looked at him and my eyes filled with tears and not sure WHY but I thought it was something we'd do together. He said, "You're always saying you wonder if you should rejoin..." I said, "NO - I said that ONE TIME, but I don't want the focus on points, but on nutrition!" He snagged it back and put it right in the shredder and hugged me, etc., I love you as you are, etc. I don't know WHY I got upset.

Got out and worked in the garden this morning, clearing leaves and overgrowth and gunk from my lamb's ear and tulip and daffodil bulbs coming up. Then in the afternoon, about 90 minutes cleaning back gardens and raking some leaves up. A trail walk with my pooch late afternoon, did the full trail, albeit slowly while she sniffed everything that has thawed out, growled at dogs larger than her, and ignored those smaller than her who growled at her. Decided since it was a meandering walk, I could call my brother and we caught up for an hour - I do love our conversations. Nice to enjoy the walk, the talk and not just ticking it off my to do list.

DH finishes his last shift of days this go-round tonight. Our schedules are completely opposite here again. Didn't do a great job with planning our week's menus ... I think I just bought oddball things we needed instead of planning the weeks out.
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Old 03-15-2015, 07:02 PM   #128  
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NationlParker Night shift for your DH? Ouch! We only had that for a very, very short time and with a baby or two, I didn't get sleep anytime and he probably didn't either. Gardening sounds familiar, isn't it great to see those daffodils !!!

CurlyJax next time you check in it may look more familiar. One time I had same experience without changing anything on my computer, then the next day all was back t normal.

BIll Loved hearing about those 7 courses to really get to try bits of delicious food. I'd love something like that and bet no more food would be needed.

I had to laugh, Beck says to eat every single bite sitting down. Yesterday I was taking a pill with water, but stopped long enough to find a chair, sit down, even prayed the blessing, then took my pill. Then I really discovered I've learned ONE of her must do's very well. Thank You Dr. Beck.

The second one that is full absorbed is to eat slowly and enjoy every bite. I'm really enjoying my food now, and eating less, too.

Exercise is largest problem. No time available when weather is good, then when it is rainy or cold I seem overwhelmed with work needs.

Before long, I shall get the exercise under control, too. CHECK: I am doing spontaneous exercise during commercials most evenings for at least some movement. CHECK: Food healthy and on plan. CHECK: Plenty of sleep at night and scale shows I'm going back down instead of up.
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Old 03-15-2015, 10:35 PM   #129  
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Maryann: the bodyscan, and several other meditations are on the CD that comes with the book called The Mindful Way Through Depression by Jon Kabat-Zinn. He has, to me, a very pleasant voice. I haven't even started the book yet! So far the CD is worth the price of admission!
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Old 03-16-2015, 05:46 AM   #130  
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Thumbs up Monday - Freedom of Information Day

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Last night's 2.9 inches of snow put Boston over the top - 108.6 inches (9+ feet) - to break the record season's snowfall since records started being kept in 1872. It's a good feeling to be recognized for our long hard dig. But, I didn't have to eat about it, LOL. Eating was on plan, CREDIT moi, including taking nothing from a spread that included home baked goodies and two quiches.

Walked, CREDIT moi, the standard Sunday walk. It drizzled a bit on the walk home but my jacked had a hood. More sidewalks were clear - enough that I didn't even once have to walk in the street. What a joy.


onebyone – This is the kind of refrain that encourages me, "I'm not going to eat over this."

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Ouch for the allergies - even in the face of the joy that they herald spring. Congrats for setting up meeting without snacks. Love the optimism in "change the world, one meeting at a time."

maryann - So neat to make bread from your own wheat - that's on my Bucket List. Congrats for choosing the wardrobe items you wanted instead of perfectionism.

nationalparker – My DW would be so jealous of your 90 minutes of gardening time; our yard is still deep under snow. Congrats on the recovery in marital communications.

curlyjax - Good luck conquering your new browser. I agree, it's tiring to be forced to change the stuff that's working. Hope you find a way to exercise and parent at the same time.

love2garden - Congrats on a scale that's going back down and Kudos for taking the sitting down strategy so seriously.

Ani (dailypractice) - Neat perspective, " a LIFELONG process I'm PRIVILEGED to be engaged in." Love getting a bargain on a book that's wanted.

Readers -
Quote:
day 33 Eliminate Emotional Eating
Food can be an effective distractor - temporarily.
.But eating doesn't solve the problem that led to
..............your distress
in the first place.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 228.
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Old 03-16-2015, 06:39 AM   #131  
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Arrow Completed Day 1: Record the advantages of losing weight

Day 1: Record the advantages of losing weight

Sunday was Beck restart day. I completed Day 1. Since this isn't my first time through, I know the drill and what's ahead, so that's good. And I know without a doubt that I am CAPABLE of accomplishing this.

Of all the advantages I wrote, I've found in the past the one that is most powerful at moderating my OE is: "This is my DAILY PRACTICE, not unlike a Buddhist monk's meditation practice. It is a PROMISE I make to myself that I am loathe to break,". This advantage holds firm when others (involving health and vanity or what other people think) are shaky.

[+] I (re)wrote out my list of advantages.
[+] stayed on plan for breakfast and dinner
[+] made it thru a birthday party lunch making reasonably good food choices.
[-] oops ... I'd planned "no cake". Didn't follow the plan.
[+] water instead of soda with dinner (I'd forgotten how satisfying water can be).
[+] no evening snack
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Old 03-16-2015, 07:20 AM   #132  
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Smile Thanks everyone for the welcome. Nice to meet all of you.

Everyone/coaches/buddies: Thanks so much for this forum and venue. I'm already learning so much from each of you by your examples and by the way you share your journeys, your struggles and your creative solutions to problems and especially in the way you support each other with empathy and gently coaching.

NationalParker: I like that you give yourself credit for being "80% on track". Excellent philosophy. And kudos to you for the healthy meal. You've given me some good ideas: salmon on salad, homemade dressing.

Bill: Kudos to you for staying on track with “only seven bites”. I LIKE that idea, even for at home meals: tiny morsels of wonderfully healthy food. And thanks much for including the helpful morsels from the Beck book.

GardenerJoy: Sorry about your allergies and hurray for you for initiating snackfree meetings. That is a big challenge for me too.

OneByOne: Your mantra is inspiring "Me eating over this will not make that house clean". So true. Good for you.

MaryAnn: That's so cool that you make bread with wheat your dh grows. Thanks for mentioning the idea. I'm going to get up as soon as I finish this post and get my bread machine going (with store bought wheat LOL). Oh.. and I envy your Ireland trip. It's on my bucket list.

CurlyJax: Thanks for mentioning strength training. I get in lots of walks, but strength is an area I need to work on. I wish you the best on finding the time alongside your other duties.

LoveToGarden: I had to laugh at your sitting down to take a pill. Kudos on your "spontaneous exercise during commercials". Great idea.
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Old 03-16-2015, 09:17 AM   #133  
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Thumbs up Official

Good Morning Coaches

Official weigh-in resulted in the official result of 2lbs down this week.
My guy gets to come back. May he live long and have many friends!

Yesterday I did go, with DH, to help BIL and SIL clean out her father's 2 floor, 3 bedroom, townhouse-condo. I wasn't overwhelmed having had to clean out places of residence for my mother 4 x now and my own 3 bedroom townhouse with basement when we moved here 4 or 5 years ago. DH and BIL were wearing rubber gloves as they moved stuff. hello? A bit dramatic if you ask me.

We hardly spent any time there at all-only 2 hours. I told SIL to take advantage of having the boys there, to make sure they move big heavy things together. DH brought his almost-completely-useless handtruck that he loves. This was one of the times it was useful. Credit to DH to ignoring me dis the handtruck. I spent the time focused on one room with SIL. The "theatre" room. So many media things-all just a bit too old to be wanted except by the collector. I brought some boxes with me which was something she has not had. These were the first boxes. I guess they have just been filling up garbage bags and out it goes. So difficult. I was ok through it and we went out to Swiss Chalet afterwards where I also did ok. Today I have a long day at the potter's guild completing my part of the commissioned project the guild is doing for our town council. I figure it'll be 3 or so hours and then I have done my bit. If I do it today we will be way ahead of schedule as well.
Many people will be pleased and relieved. I have already packed my lunch for today and I have had my green juice. I am ** out of kale! That is the first time I have ever said that! So after the guild my reward will be buying more greens.

DH and I are going to check out the rent on the two houses beside us on the street that are for lease. They may be a bit more than what we pay here for rent, but with the studio rent and my locker rent, they may be comparable. I'm going to call and take a look at them if they are reasonable, but my gut tells me we can maybe buy something next year. I am squirreling some money away and if I get myself into the big xmas show I think I can put us over the top so we can maybe buy our first house. THAT is the TRUE BENEFIT of having done our taxes. Looking forward to getting them done again.

Guess that's it. I'm hoping to get into my studio soon and at my prints and my paintings. I need a break from the ceramics.

Bye for now. Have a good OP day.
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Old 03-16-2015, 10:21 AM   #134  
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Welcome to the new folks.

Dailypractice: I've always been drawn to monastic life. Not being Catholic or Buddhist is probably the only reason I never entered a monastery.

Question for all: If you've memorized your ARC, do you think occasionally just saying them in your read is an acceptable substitute for reading them? I have a reminder app set for doing it and sometimes when my phone buzzes at me, I just don't feel like interrupting my work to dig my purse out of my desk drawer and my ARC out of my purse.
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Old 03-16-2015, 10:22 AM   #135  
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The world conspired in such a way that I didn't make a plan for the week, like I usually do on Sunday, or today, like I do each evening. The biggest hurdle was a flat tire yesterday -- which, of course, has to be repaired and put back on the car today. We've had a AAA card for 25 years and I used it for service for the first time yesterday. It worked!

The flat happened on the way home from a tea tasting. I was pleased that a tea tasting is not accompanied by food. I had that possibility written into my plan but preferred the version of my plan that meant I ate everything at home.

I was determined to get to the half-way point on my exercise goal yesterday and I managed it with a late walk.

Okay. Off to get some breakfast and then plan my day, including the food.

WI: -0.35 kg (new low), Exercise: +30 650/1300 minutes for March, Food: 100% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
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