Beck Diet For Life/Solution – July 2014 – Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

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  • Welcome to the discussion group, support group, Diet Coach group, Diet Buddy group relating to the two books by Dr. Judith S. Beck:
    The Complete Beck Diet for Life
    and the first book
    The Beck DIET solution: train your brain to think like a thin person.
    The Beck Diet Solution is a psychological program, not a food plan. It provides a step-by-step program to learn specific techniques to stay on our diet, lose weight, and maintain our weight loss for life. The program is based on Dr. Beck's clinical research in Cognitive Therapy (CT).

    The Complete Beck Diet for Life expands the earlier work and includes a food plan with suggested menus. From the cover:
    With The Complete Beck Diet for Life you'll discover the 5 stages of successful dieting and maintenance. You'll learn how to motivate yourself, give yourself credit for every change you make, create time and energy for dieting, and handle hunger and cravings. Dr. Beck eases you into changing one step at a time. You'll master one task before moving on to the next. And you'll learn techniques to deal with challenging situations, such as sticking with ou plan at celebrations and dealing with "food pushers." With Dr. Beck's skills, you'll achieve a lifetime of healthful eating and lifelong motivation.
    This is a place to discuss the Beck strategies and our daily efforts, to receive and provide support, and, for some of us, is where we serve as on-line diet buddy (coach) to each other.

    If you’ve arrived from a search engine, you’ve landed at the site of 3 Fat Chicks (3FC), a remarkable place for those interested in a healthy life style, including mindful eating, exercise, and weight loss. More about the site, including how to register so that you can post, can be found here.

    The books are available on Amazon through the 3FC store by clicking their names above; buying through 3FC helps to cover the costs of running this site.

    You can find the list of previous (or more current) monthly Beck threads here on 3 Fat Chicks via:

    List of Monthly Beck Threads for Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach
  • Tuesday - Canada Day
    Diet Coaches/Buddies – Eating was on plan, CREDIT moi, except for snacks, Ouch. I'll hang in here until I get back on track. Dinner included yet another big bowl of our garden's lettuce. DW and I continued to sit on the patio after dinner savoring the most perfect evening of the year, reading until the light faded.

    Walked, CREDIT moi, to the hardware store to buy a dozen machine screws of different lengths that I might need while on the ladder. Made progress on the another project that required cutting two holes in the ceiling - thought this was a good time to do it since I was in the habit of being covered in plaster debris. This went well. The expensive Dremel tool that I borrowed from my DS to make the hole burned out its cutting drill in a quarter of the circle. I had to resort to more old-fashioned brute force techniques that worked just fine. Apparently, my optimizing brain will happily spend an hour getting the perfect tool for a job that would take only 15 minutes using brute force. DW just uses the brute force method and moves forward. Mixed marriage, this.

    onebyone – Yay for using that fancy planter that had previously been designated to go away - from a guy who throws away nothing and looks for reinforcement that that's an OK way to live, LOL. A 45 minute private raptor experience is just about the best birthday present I've ever heard about.

    Joy (gardenerjoy) – Yay for lettuce from seed; I'll have to consider your seed tape since those seeds are so tiny, tiny. Kudos for such careful analysis of your data.

    Debbie (Lexxiss) – Hope your new tenants arrived, are ensconced, and are happily paying rent.

    silverbirch – We call it Water Cress. Wiki calls it Garden Cress. Just plain Cress is new to me. When we were kids, fancy sandwiches cut into triangles first had the crust removed. We kids loved that - a whole plate full of sandwich crusts with pimento cheese salad oozing out for us to scarf.

    Woodland - Congrats for having an elliptical for exercise when the winds are up.

    nationalparker – Kudos for buying salad but NO pizza from a pizza joint - not sure that I could do that. When our kids were little I had memorized the phone number of the local pizza place. This seems like useful advice for many situations, "Why worry now when I don't even KNOW."

    Tricia (AZtricia) - Ouch for "achy" with Extra Kudos for being on-plan anyway. Scales, like kids, seem to have a mind of their own.

    6crowsgold - Ouch for sick; Yay for a pound lost forever, anyway.

    Readers -
    day 18 Change your Definition of Full

    what are you thinking?
    Are you feeling resistant about recognizing that you have to eat less? Then read the following sabotaging thoughts and create Response Cards based on the responses below.

    Sabotaging Thought: My diet plan says I'm allowed to have unlimited amounts of certain foods. What's the harm of eating lots of them?
    Helpful Response: I'm going to have many, many experiences in which I don't have access to these unlimited foods: at restaurants, buffets, and social gatherings. If I haven't repeatedly practice eating to normal fullness, I'm likely to eat too much of the foods I have to limit in those situations.

    Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 160.
  • Contracts signed!

    Today has been a 'wanting' day. I had breakfast and left the house for a haircut where I wandered through a deli and wanted spinache and cheese rolls (hot). I peered at them but remembered I had eaten breakfast and didn't need them. I then went to the hospital for tests and had coffee to fill time, and kept looking at toasted sandwiches (you know what cheese, ham and tomato smells like). I only had coffee. I then went to work and seriously thought about getting food from the cafeteria but ate the lunch I had brought with me. And on the way home I decided "da*n it I am having fish and chips" so stopped at the mall with a good fish shop and they were closed (running late tonight again), so bought healthy meat for the oven which will feed me tomorrow as well. So my resistance muscle has had a painful workout today.

    I signed the contract today and will know next (not this) Wednesday if it is a done deal. I think it is but... So I may have sold my house but no celebrating yet

    BillBE - Good to see progress with the fan, and keeping up the ongoing battle with sneaky snacks. How do you know how much produce to take from the community garden - does each person plant their own stuff??

    Debbie (Lexxiss) - another on-plan day in your run of on-plan days. I need a list of go to meals like you seem to have (I keep saying this I know - still a project!) I also love that we have such great support from a bunch of 'strangers'

    Gardenerjoy - I have some seed tape to try (in my tiny garden) so it is good to read a good report. Love cress and rocket and the spicy mustard type greens. I still can't get excited by cold roast veggies in a salad - may be 15 years as a vegetarian and always being confronted by roast veggie stack wherever I went

    Tricia - the pounds will go as you are on plan - it is disappointing so credit for hanging in there to you too!

    Waving to the rest of you - running very late

    - Checked in
    - Logged my food
    - Ate mindfully most of the time
    - I stopped eating when satisfied
    - Used distraction and resistance techniques (definitely tolerated non-hunger without eating)
    - Weighed myself
    - Made opportunities for incidental exercise
    - Gave credit for positive behaviours
    - Made a food plan for tomorrow
    - Made a schedule for tomorrow
  • Hi Coaches!

    Yesterday OP, even though the new tenant didn't wasn't a reason to eat. Credit. I'm giving them today but am already doing the footwork to locate someone else. I countered my thoughts of nibbles at work yesterday with the statement, "I'm not eating____today because I'm trying to lose more weight. It helps me when I remember I "choose" not to eat off my written plan. Credit. DH is stirring and I have yet to burn some of my weed my weight they tend to spiral out of control without consistent mindfulness and associated action.

    Cheryl(GosfordGirl), kudos for super rigorous resistance on a day when everything seemed to be calling your name. Really, nothing tastes as good as being thinner feels.

    everyone! I've got to keep moving here.
  • I read through Day 7 of The Diet Fix again. This is my least favorite day even though, on the surface, I agree with pretty much everything he says. My objection starts with the chapter title "Indulge!" I swear, I think that word is triggering for me. And it's not a trigger for the very controlled sort of thing he's talking about in this chapter, it's a trigger for wild abandonment around food as if I didn't have a care in the world related to it. A nostalgia for a by-gone day when I actually could do that without consequences -- probably one day when I was sixteen or so.

    What he actually advocates is being aware of every special calorie you're about to consume and asking yourself if it's really worth it and how small the amount could be to make you happy. That's probably what I'll use going forward for things like birthday parties. For run-of-the-mill desires, I think I'm better off with the Beck principle: I can plan this treat for tomorrow.

    WI: -0.15 kg, Exercise: +50 1400/1400 minutes for June, Food: 100% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

    Thanks, silverbirch! I just rewrote my lunch plan...We're going to England in September. I worked out our Bath itinerary last week ( and the Birmingham itinerary a couple of months ago ( I'm still working out the plan for 10 days in London to finish our trip.

    BillBlueEyes: We have Water Cress in Missouri -- an invasive that grows in all our springs. People seem less concerned about it than other invasives because it's so delicious. The cress I'm growing in the garden is different because that Water Cress only grows in running cold water. Similar in that it's a spicy green, though.
  • Hello Coaches

    Warning- skip over if you are not in the mood for my misery.

    I am posting even though I don't want to and even though I doubt anyone wants to read this. My weight has gone from 286 back up to 290. Sigh. How many times am I going to do this? My weight loss efforts inevitably end up like this. Do great for a bit, then start to slip and then just eat whatever cause I am (pick an excuse)- busy, tired, stressed, going out, etc. That ends up with feeling horrible physically and emotionally and then feeling depressed. I don't know if this makes sense but everything to do with losing weight is just starting to feel like one big drama, including this post. I have a horrible feeling that this is not going to happen for me and am attributing that to all sorts of negative thoughts about myself and my abilities. I know that sort of thinking is not helpful.

    So I start again. I am going on a trip on Friday for a week to visit relatives and need to muster some enthusiasm.

    Anyway today I have a plan:

    -don't eat any sugar
    -read response and advantage cards and listen to motivational app
    -do second set of leg/knee/ankle stretches and exercises tonight
    -eat a big salad at lunch with half cup of carbs
    -eat yogurt and berries for snack tonight
    -eat dinner at the neighbours and keep to protein and veggies
    -check back in tonight and see if I did these things

    Hope everyone is having a good day and Happy Canada Day to my fellow Canucks!

  • Good Morning, Coaches.

    I thought today would be a feeling of defeat and a bummer. It is July 1st and "change the ticker day." I have officially gained seven pounds since March, but I don't feel defeated. I have read through the posts for the day and realize that no matter what one weighs, peace with food comes just for today. That means today can be a success.

    I am one month away from my anniversary date on this blog. I am going to take this month to rework the pink book. I have learned so much on this journey. I know what food I can't tolerate, what food causes addiction that makes it nearly impossible to lose weight. Now I am back to my behavior. I am failing on a daily basis even the most simple tasks like sitting while eating and stopping when full. So I have searched and found my pink book (that took some doing and a lot of dusting where I found it.) I am taking my Vitamix up to the cabin for the week and leaving it there (per DH order) because he wants me to buy a new one for down here. Then I will have one both places.(My cheapness says it is a waste but what price can I put on my health? The cost is seven family meals out.) I have several more hike and pack trips planned in the next two weeks. It is a perfect time to work on behavior and not be tied to a specific meal plan.

    Grateful for new beginnings. Grateful this journey has led to the rest of the family eating more healthy. (DS is finishing his smoothie right now for breakfast.)

    Thanks for everyone's continuing support. Welcome back, Woodland.

    BBE: Chasing the perfect tool reminds me of chasing the perfect meal plan. Both seem a little less important than good old fashioned gumption.

    GosfordGirl: Your first line really struck me. This is a wanting day. So many wanting days when I first wake up - mostly wanting to not be a compulsive overeater and therefore to be free of any discipline. This is a powerful thread that runs through my life and it needs to be counteracted by "acceptance of the the things I can not change."

    Lexxiss: Thxs for the example of using your thoughtful mind to counteract reactionary feelings. That is a biggy.

    gardenerjoy: Focusing on "how little can I eat to be satisfied." That is in direct opposition to my "eating eating all tonite for tomorrow I diet."

    Ceejay: I know our numbers are different but the feelings are the same. I am starting all over again today as well. I am focusing on "Look at how much I have learned about myself through this journey." Posting is never a waste becuase it is truth. I hate to write a cliche but "The truth will set us free." Compulsive overeating is a disease of isolation. It wants us to think we should NOT talk about our pain. It makes us more likely to leave alone in the shadows.
  • Not my best day to date ... hoping for an attitude change on my own part, which I completely control, so ... Not bad until an email came from sister, which soured my whole outlook today. I honestly can say that down the line, I will not choose to interact with her much if any at all. I cannot stand the martyr/victim role she derives such great pleasure from. Dad is now in hospice care with his care team changing to their drs/nurses, etc., but at home for hopefully quite a while. My hopes - no insight.

    Finally faced the dang scale this morning to find I'm less than 1.5 pounds from ticker and okay with that ... tonight's dinner will be mexican burrito bowls with lettuce, tomato, onion, hot pico, black beans, cilantro lime rice (requiring a marketing run on the way home for lime and cilantro) and seasoned chicken. This will score a few meals for us this week, though, and ones with ample veggies. The trick is to start with small servings of each item in the bowls and not create ginormous bowls. Will set the table on the patio this evening and enjoy a cooling trend.

    Bill - I like your description of your mixed marriage. Mine is close as well. I use anything handy as a tool - the heel of my shoe, whatever, while DH finds the right tool for the job. I drive him bonkers with that. Hope you get our cooler weather in a day or so - nights in the mid-50s to come.

    CeeJay - Credits for a good, solid day one plan. Sounds like you've picked yourself up, dusted yourself off, and are ready to go. What helped me was to not restart with another day one if I get sidetracked in a week or so - it's just another day in my journey. I know one of my journals had the line, "How many Day Ones can one have?" I hated that. I liked it when it was a fresh start, reinvigorated, but then dang it, I always strayed a bit. Now I see that it's going to happen to everyone. Life's that way. It's the coming back that matters.

    Cheryl/GosfordGirl - I'm going to borrow that "wanting day" ... I find I have those on weekends quite often. I can just picture and smell what you've described. It makes me feel less alone that we all face challenges, it's not just in this country.

    Lexxiss - GREAT job for not eating over the stress of the MIA tenant. I need to realize that eating will not solve the issue that sends me into the kitchen. A good reminder that eating after reading my sister's emails only further hurts me.

    GardenerJoy - Oh, your trip sounds wonderful. I love trip dreaming and must ask DH weekly if he wants to go here or there. (Always a yes from him.) We're staying close to home now while my father is not well, but fun to plan for one day.
  • Hi,

    Yesterday my sabotaging thoughts won, but I'm back on track again. It felt lousy to give in, but maybe I had to feel that to know (again) I didn't want to live that way.

    After reading your posts, I heard a number of you echo the "re-group" theme. I'm there with you! I have a plan for tomorrow, even though I need to figure out the nutrition for my broccoli casserole.
  • Hungry but OP for today. Yucky day. Pup made a mess in the house. Sons were cranky. I didn't feel like doing much and forgot to start the bread-maker twice, ds finally started it. I am already tired of summer. I really need to add my DVD exercise back in but don't want too because I'm hot. Off to walk the dog one more time and "good-night" all.

    Beck FB Tuesday Reality Check: It’s important to keep in mind that emotions aren’t harmful, and nothing bad will happen as a result of experiencing them. If something sad or stressful happens, it’s appropriate to feel sadness or stress! And, you don’t need to do anything (like eat) to make negative emotions go away – they always pass, 100% of the time.

    And forgot yesterday: Monday Motivation: If you feel discouraged thinking about how much weight you have to lose, keep in mind that it’s not as if you have to lose all the weight before you start feeling good. EVERY pound you lose along the way feels better and you can experience significant improvements both physically and psychologically long before the last pound has been lost.

    Woodland Kudos for a plan and getting right back on track.

    nationalparker Sorry your sis is being difficult still. Your dinner sounds great.

    maryann Kudos for working on your healthy behaviors and for letting dh take care of you and be thoughtful.

    CeeJay Thanks for checking in and for keeping on. Don't give up.

    gardenerjoy I don't like the day 7 DF title either, it gives the wrong impression.

    Debbie/Lexxiss Best of luck with finding a tenant, so sorry the first is a no show.

    Cheryl/GosfordGirl Thanks, needed the will power today for a hungry day and discouraging to have no loss for two weeks now. Hoping your resistance muscle workout strengthened you.

    BillBlueEyes Totally relate to the "mixed marriage" wishing you wisdom in analyzing/fixing your snacks.
  • Coaches

    A fairly mediocre day - I ate my lunch with no other temptations around and I got Thai take-away I had planned for - but wished I hadn't. I stopped before full but just didn't like it really. Busy at work and very late home again so a brief check in

    BillBE - great planning to buy a screw for all occasions. LOL at mixed marriage

    CeeJay - good to see you here with a great plan for the day. Hope it went well

    Maryann - Credit for not feeling defeated and just taking the numbers in your stride. Great idea to rework the pink book. Glad your DH is supportive of what you need to do

    Nationalparker - your mexican burrito bowls seem delish. Glad your dad's care is being sorted out

    Tricia - thanks for the FB quotes - as ever very relevant. Chin up - you sound weighed down by summer and routine and I haven't heard you so down. That's OK - we all have bad days but it just seems to be unusual for you

    - Checked in
    - I stopped eating when satisfied
    - Used distraction and resistance techniques
    - Weighed myself
    - Read my A&R cards
    - Rewrote my A&R cards
    - Read my Beck book
    - Gave credit for positive behaviours
    - Made a food plan for tomorrow
    - Made a schedule for tomorrow
  • Wednesday
    Diet Coaches/Buddies – Planned to get a task done in half a day; completed it before lunch. Yay!! I celebrate because I'm usually off by a factor of 2x to 4x estimating how long it'll take to get something done. One walk, CREDIT moi, to one hardware store was included in that.

    Meals were on plan, CREDIT moi, snacks were off - Ouch. Sounding like a theme. I drank more water than normal. Working in my hot attic sucks moisture like crazy. I did, finally, haul up a compact floor fan to reduce the impact. Today's the day my drill bit arrives from Amazon - ya know, like anticipating my tenth birthday. I'm easily pleased.

    Joy (gardenerjoy) – Shall spend my work time today cogitating the notion of "run-of-the-mill desires" - could be that always thinking that this moment is special is tripping me. I do admire the thoroughness of your planning via the links you provided silverbirch.

    CeeJay - Kudos for dumping all the negative to your Diet Coaches then marching forward with a doable plan. Yep, a week with relatives requires planning ahead for those situations that you can't control.

    Debbie (Lexxiss) – Ouch for a no-show tenant. Here's hoping that Plan B works out. We have the same problem here - wish Dr. Beck would write a 'Solution' book for weeds, LOL.

    Cheryl (GosfordGirl) – Kudos for developing a Resistance Muscle that's strong enough for a good workout. I so identify with that notion of "a 'wanting' day" - like our four year old bursting out. [The community garden is divided into 10 foot by 10 foot plots. We each sow and reap from our own plot. It's considered bad form to snitch. The big raspberry patch on the end challenges me there.] Double Kudos for "stopped before full" with that Thai take-out.

    maryann - Congrats for choosing a DH who insists on a second Vitamix recognizing that the cost is swamped by the benefits. Love the fragment, "peace with food comes just for today."

    Woodland - Kudos for "I'm back on track again" - the key step for success is getting back right away.

    nationalparker – Such a stress for your dad to have to change all doctors and nurses - glad that you have a care team in place to help him through that. Supportive thoughts to you for continuing to face the created drama. Drooling over your burrito bowls eaten on patio. LOL at, "not create ginormous bowls" - my first thought always.

    Tricia (AZtricia) - Ouch for hot! Up here we claim that your low humidity makes you hot bearable. Extra Kudos for op plan despite hungry.

    Readers -
    day 18 Change your Definition of Full

    what are you thinking?
    Are you feeling resistant about recognizing that you have to eat less? Then read the following sabotaging thoughts and create Response Cards based on the responses below.

    Sabotaging Thought: What if I end up feeling hungry before it's time to eat again?
    Helpful Response: I learned on Day 12 that hunger is not an emergency, that I can tolerate the sensations of hunger, and that, if I don't' focus on it, the hunger will dissipate. If I still don't feel confident in my abilities to tolerate hunger, I should repeat the Day 12 tasks (pages 121-126) in addition to completing today's task.

    Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 160.
  • Hi Coaches!

    Went to visit relatives this weekend and had 2 brownies and a cookie by Sunday night. Tortured throughout. I recently (6/2) was diagnosed with a dairy allergy: off the charts on the iGg and iGa blood tests. I had suspected a wheat sensitivity and had gone gluten free. Well when wheat did not trigger an inflammation response, I added it back. Slowly at first but then fully. Piece of toast with breakfast, sandwich at lunch, roll on my hamburger etc. Im now feeling the effects of adding the gluten back! aaack. blood sugar spikes, sugar cravings, and strangely, sinus headaches and post nasal drip. Those last two I had forgotten all about until they hit again and I had to dust off my sinus headache medicine. So goodbye gluten again. Not sorry to see it go really.

    Im also an "all or nothing" kind of gal. If I can't do my plan perfectly, then not at all. My plan needs to be more flexible. Counting exchanges means you know exactly what and how much is in every food. Eating out and at other people's houses means you do not know. I will work towards more flexibility to make my plan fit my life.

    Back to my Beck book: Day 8 Create Time and Energy
  • I made a very American version of an egg-and-cress sandwich. Fried egg, a little mayo (no butter), and cress, on a grainy bread with the crusts very much intact. I didn't even cut it in half because it would have made a mess of the yolk. Yummy!

    WI: -0.05 kg, Exercise: +50 50/1400 minutes for July, Food: 100% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

    CeeJay: always love seeing you here. I've definitely been there. What's helped me recently is Dr. Yoni's advice to "diarize" everything. For about two months, now, I've logged even the bad stuff (and even when I have to estimate) and I'm surprised, in the long run, how much that has helped. I get back on track more quickly and with less drama. And, now, I can report that I seem to be going off track less frequently. Of course, I've seen that advice before, but Dr. Yoni's friendly and non-judgmental attitude really helped me finally do it.

    BeachBody: yep, figuring out how to make a plan flexible enough for outings is definitely a key to long-term success. My normal plan for pot-luck with family is "no snacks, focus on the vegetables, tiny servings of everything else."
  • Good Morning, Coaches.

    Packing up to go to Tahoe for a week. A step class is planned this morning before I go.

    Completed Day 1 in the pink book. My first advantage on my card is new for me: I will feel nourished and loved when I stay ON PLAN.

    Mostly I feel deprived and depleted when I stay On Plan because I am refused the "high" I look for in food. How much peace I will have to feel comfort when I practice discipline.

    Wave to all.