3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

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BillBlueEyes 12-01-2013 05:58 AM

Beck Diet For Life/Solution – December 2013 – Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach
Welcome to the discussion group, support group, diet coach group, diet buddy group relating to the two books by Dr. Judith S. Beck:and the first bookThe Beck Diet Solution is a psychological program, not a food plan. It provides a step-by-step program to learn specific techniques to stay on our diet, lose weight, and maintain our weight loss for life. The program is based on Dr. Beck's clinical research in Cognitive Therapy (CT).

The Complete Beck Diet for Life expands the earlier work and includes a food plan with suggested menus. From the cover:
With The Complete Beck Diet for Life you'll discover the 5 stages of successful dieting and maintenance. You'll learn how to motivate yourself, give yourself credit for every change you make, create time and energy for dieting, and handle hunger and cravings. Dr. Beck eases you into changing one step at a time. You'll master one task before moving on to the next. And you'll learn techniques to deal with challenging situations, such as sticking with ou plan at celebrations and dealing with "food pushers." With Dr. Beck's skills, you'll achieve a lifetime of healthful eating and lifelong motivation.
This is a place to discuss the Beck strategies and our daily efforts, to receive and provide support, and, for some of us, is where we serve as on-line diet buddy (coach) to each other.

If you’ve arrived from a search engine, you’ve landed at the site of 3 Fat Chicks (3FC), a remarkable place for those interested in a healthy life style, including mindful eating, exercise, and weight loss. More about the site, including how to register so that you can post, can be found here.

The books are available on Amazon through the 3FC store by clicking their names above; buying through 3FC helps to cover the costs of running this site.

You can find the list of previous (or more current) monthly Beck threads here on 3 Fat Chicks via:

List of Monthly Beck Threads for Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

BillBlueEyes 12-01-2013 05:59 AM

Sunday - World Aids Awareness Day
Diet Coaches/Buddies – Eleventh day on plan, CREDIT moi. Happy little streak going here. We had turkey for dinner; we had turkey for lunch - both same as the day before. (I'm sticking with cereal for breakfast, LOL.) The leftover food is fine eating - tasty and on-plan. The leftover goodies are calling my name, however, and need to find a new home. One guest left a box of top-shelf fudge as a hostess gift; I couldn't find anyone to take it home. Today I'll bring it to fellowship hour where folks of a wide range of ages will consume just about anything.

Not much exercise. At the supermarket I walked past a HUGE display of Christmas candy, already marked with sale prices. The good news is that it didn't look tempting. It was all stuff I've seen in prior years and will see again next year.

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Yep, it's tricky when our excursions weave into our eating schedule.

Cheryl (seadwaters) – That's a huge wad of steps for the day. Ouch for the scale jiggle out of onederland with Kudos for recognizing that sugar is a trigger for you.

Pam (pamaga) – Good guideline this, "nutrient rich, calorie poor." Kudos for being aware of the needs of your own body.

maryann - Ouch for having to witness family drama. Kudos for celebrating a new day.

nationalparker – Boy, do I need this, "Stress is not an excuse to eat." Thanks. Kudos for visiting your own freezer for a pizza of known calories.

Readers -

day 8 Create Time and Energy

what are you thinking?
Connie had an unspoken rule, I have to be the best mother possible. Therefore, she didn't reduce such nonessential activities as picking up her youngsters at school (when they could have taken the bus), taking them to every after-school activity they requested, and spending most of her free time doing things with them.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 105.

nationalparker 12-01-2013 10:16 AM

Well, I have to admit that last night wasn't the lightest - dinner (at home) of leftovers didn't include anything green as green bits in the stuffing don't count. I took one small serving of what I wanted, but could have cut the options down and not reheated everything. DH was trying to tempt me with a half slice of apple pie, but I stood firm. Another late night of job work until 2 a.m. ... up this morning to ensure that there are no issues with the data... waiting for the all-clear.

So my last night wasn't the lightest night, so I'm not adding in a point for yesterday, but will honestly say that five of the last six days I've done well except for that blip meal of too many simple carbs. There should be a warning in my mind: if it goes down easy...beware :)

Mom is still in hospital and looks like she may be released tomorrow. Keeping fingers crossed that she doesn't pick up an infection while there, but that she's released when things are stable, not too soon, thus necessitating a return admittance - I think those are demoralizing.

Goals today are smart breakfasts and lunches and if we go out to dinner tonight for a belated dinner date put off from last week, to eat half my portion and bring the remainder home, eat slowly, and to not go there ravenous.

Bill - thank you for remembering the December new thread. I forgot and went to the old one. MAJOR kudos for 11 days on plan and counting. Through the minefield of holiday food and leftovers and gifts. Wise and generous idea to bring the quality fudge with you to the fellowship.

Was watching the scale make it's minute descents from 172.0 ... 171.8 ... 171.6... but after last night, I think it's wise if I take a break this morning. (She says...)

Enjoy the last of the Thanksgiving weekend, U.S. posters! :)

gardenerjoy 12-01-2013 10:43 AM

My 100%OP Day makes my streak count = 6.

Building a streak of 100%OP days has been an interesting experiment. I lost most of my weight on 80% and 90% days -- that has some advantages of flexibility and reduced perfectionism. But I'm learning, now, that I can shape my day around my food if I'm determined to do it. That's going to be a useful skill for me going forward.

In other news, I met my exercise goal for November while increasing my streak to 134 days of exercise in a row.

WI: +0.4 kg, Exercise: +55 1400/1400 minutes for November, Food: 100%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

maryann 12-01-2013 11:47 AM

Good Morning, Coaches.

Credit walk this morning and OP yesterday. Big Credit for moving the ticker down for the first of the month. 2.2 pounds left to goal - because 149.8 counts :) That gives me three weeks to lose two pounds ( and that does not sound easy knowing how slowly I lose weight)

DH was very helpful and comforting yesterday which I appreciate. The three of us are going out to the ranch to take our annual Xmas card picture. DS will be on his very own tractor. DH said it was the smallest Tenco they make. Whether or not that is still ok for an 11yo remains to be seen. But I am keeping silent. Our family has always maintain the agreement that I am in charge of education and DH is in charge of motorized vehicles.

Pamatga: I agree completely with you. Cravings arise from an insufficient or incorrect diet. For me, I have discovered foods I am sensitive which cause cravings. I have added some supplements and taken out some foods and it has made a big difference.

Seadwaters: I have eliminated dairy for over three months and it has made a big difference. I use coconut milk, and it is yummy in a smoothie as well.

nationalparker: 2 a.m. work nights is not easy. I don't know how you do it.

gardenerjoy and BBE: Congrats on your streaks. Impressive.

pamatga 12-01-2013 12:04 PM

Day Fourteen-Plan for Tomorrow
Welcome December, the final month of 2013!:coffee: :lol:

The only thing that I did yesterday that I "overdid" was watching holiday movies. Three in one sitting. I finally had to "prepare" for today the last half hour of "It's A Wonderful Life".

Day 14: Plan for Tomorrow: Today ends the two weeks of "prep" work before actually culling all of the BDS skills to apply to both my food plan and workout program. As I have said I did a jump start when ForMyGirls "challenged" the group in seeing how long of a streak we all can go. It appears that all of these seasoned "coaches" can "go the distance". I don't know about anyone else but I am feeling the internal pressure of having to do this in a perfect way so I am also fighting that tendency as well. However, I have had 6 consecutive days of being OP with my meal plan as well as working out. I like to do either yoga or Pilates on Sunday for my arthritis. Hatha yoga is recommended for arthritis and I have returned to that after decades of not. I feel so much better afterwards when I do.

As for "planning for tomorrow", I have been logging my food daily for 324 days this past year. Five and a half months of that time I sent my food plan to a food sponsor. That was an added pressure since I felt like I had to explain every nuance of what I ate. It was always more about me than her but again that perfectionist tendency :devil: seems to rear its ugly head and I have to "let go" often enough until it disappears.

gardenerjoy I just noticed that in your photo you are "all green": your tomatoes, your sweater and your bush behind you. TG you have red hair or you just might "disappear". :D I am :p with envy on the size of your produce. I too am a gardener but I battled squirrels all summer for my tomatoes. I am part of a community of organic gardeners and we all were saying that we don't mind the squirrels taking a tomato here and there but don't eat two bites and then leave it on the ground to rot. Doesn't their mother squirrels tell them this when they are growing up?;)

BBE I too have had lots of leftover turkey, cold in sandwiches, along with a glass of skim milk and an apple. This year we bought a half-bushel ( 20 lbs) from an apple orchard in Blue Ridge, GA, which is near the base of the Appalachian mountains, right on the border of TN, GA and SC. Wow, the best apples that I have eaten in ages. I think we are going to take a drive and get more. We are almost finished with 20 lbs and we haven't even had them three weeks.

I did remember that you start a new thread every month. That is a great idea, especially if the group is active. I remember wondering where everyone went last time around. This time I remembered! :carrot:

BTW, great job on your streak. :cp: You are the longest in the group thus far. I am sure passing on fine chocolates has a great deal to do with that. Great job in exercising the most important muscle in our respective bodies: the resistance muscle.:strong:

nationalparker I totally agree with you on "if it goes down too easy, beware!" Isn't it interesting that most of the "former offenders" are just that? No coincidence, I am sure.

I am sorry to hear about your Mom. You and your family are in my thoughts and heart. :hug: Let's hope Mom's healing can "stick" and she doesn't have to return. I have always believed the speediest healing happens while at home and surrounded by our own familiar surroundings.

Take care all, Pam :comp:

P.S. ForMyGirls, my OP streak for both my workouts and food plan is now at 12 points for this past week and counting.

CeeJay 12-01-2013 02:48 PM

Hope everyone is well this fine Sunday afternoon. I wanted to get here to do personals but just can't fit that in today.

Thanks for the encouragement. I am now on Day 4 on plan which feels good. I am not giving up. Ever.


GosfordGirl 12-02-2013 02:41 AM

Dear Coaches

Thanks Maryann - coconut milk is great and a really good fat. I am going to avoid it as a drink for a bit as it is too calory dense for me at the moment I think. I need to reduce energy in for a bit! Happy to have it in a meal or a soup but a bit scary everyday in a shake. Great work BillBE to be 11 straight days on plan and to pass up fudge. Great streak gardenerjoy - one I want to copy. Ceejay - great work 4 days on plan - must feel good

Today was an on plan day. I took my lunch and ate only that, and had the apple I had packed for a snack. I didn't walk as much today - lots of meetings so the usual Monday. But I made my 5000 steps which is good. Only 2 flights of stairs though. The scales were a little kinder today

Checked in 3 days in a row - credit
-1.4 lb (today) (goodbye takeaway food) / -1.4 from tracker
3.46 / 3
Had a plan and followed it - no sweets, no wheat, no sneaky carbs
Packed lunch for tomorrow
Logged food

BillBlueEyes 12-02-2013 05:39 AM

Monday - New Moon
Diet Coaches/Buddies – 12 day streak on plan, CREDIT moi. Boy, that feels good. When I was first losing weight, this happened all the time. It's beginning to feel right again. We took most of the fudge to a dance class DW and I are taking in preparation for an upcoming family event where there'll be dancing. With video cameras everywhere, there's always the fear that someone will conjure the notion that someone dancing poorly would make a good YouTube contribution. Reminds me that the whole family used to like to watch 'Candid Camera' back in its day. Avoided snacking at fellowship hour, at the dance, and in the evening when stuff in the house is calling. DW kept some of the fudge for herself - wish she hadn't - but it sits marked with her name just as clearly as if with a large black marker. Both lunch and dinner were made from leftover turkey for the third straight day. It's a badge of honor since DW and I are at odds about the size of turkey to buy. I think 20 pounds is the proper size; she bought a 13 pounder. We have ample leftovers with that; she insists that it'll spoil before it gets consumed.

Exercise was a pair of walks, CREDIT moi. It wasn't exactly raining, but wasn't exactly not, either. Walked without an umbrella (that was in my pocket) but had to hang my coat, hat, and gloves to dry when we got home.

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Congrats on meeting your November exercise goal as well as for that exercise streak of 134 days.

CeeJay - Yay for the uplifting, "I am not giving up. Ever."

Cheryl (seadwaters) – Great line, "Had a plan and followed it - no sweets, no wheat, no sneaky carbs." Even with only two flights of stairs you still passed your walking goal of 5000 steps.

Pam (pamaga) – Really good point that it's worth fighting the tendency to be perfect. As Joy (gardenerjoy) noted, she lost her weight at 80-90%. I need the streak right now to break some bad habits that have built up and because it serves my contrarian mind to be rigorous doing the eating season when it's easy to add a few pounds. Jealous of your late fall apples.

maryann - I want my own tractor for Christmas. Doesn't matter that our city yard is measured as a few hundred square feet. Or that I don't know how to drive a tractor. Congrats on that ticker down.

nationalparker – Here's hoping that your mom gets released in good shape. Ouch for the super late night work (from home, I presume). Watching the scale in detail can be deadly, particularly since water weight and GI track are much larger than the short term changes in muscle, fat, and tissue.

Readers -

day 8 Create Time and Energy

what are you thinking?
John also had a rule: I have to keep my home in perfect order. Since his wife was busy with other things (and just didn't care as much as he did about how their house looked), much of the household chores fell to him. It wasn't until John relaxed his standards that he finally created enough time and energy to devote to dieting.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 105.

ForMyGirls 12-02-2013 05:59 AM

Hello coaches,

A collective total of 41 points today. Go team.

My personal contribution is back to zero after not having achieved all my "health and Wellbeing" activities today and yesterday. Oh well. I am giving myself credit for staying 100% OP on food these days even when the other stuff didn't happen. I have had a couple of nights where I didn't meet my bedtime goal too - which is always the thing that holds all the rest together so I will be getting to sleep on time tonight no matter what!

Interesting comments from Pam and Joy about perfectionism - i hope my challenge hasn't caused trouble for others! For me it has really helped - so thanks to those who are participating - and I am looking forward to having a point on the board again tomorrow :-) and if it is causing strife for any who are participating there is absolutely no obligwtin to keep going!

And thanks Pam for:
"part of developing your resistance muscle is also trying to put "pleasing others" in its rightful place. The Golden Rule is you can't give away what you don't have to give"

gardenerjoy 12-02-2013 09:35 AM

My 100%OP Day makes my streak count = 7. I'm finding this very helpful and interesting, ForMyGirls. Thanks! The thing about a streak is that you can always start over again. I broke two of my streaks over the weekend, but they are happily back up to 1 right now and I'll start building from there.

WI: -0.2 kg, Exercise: +45 45/1400 minutes for December, Food: 100%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

nationalparker 12-02-2013 12:21 PM

I had an on-plan day yesterday, so back at it for me - count +1 on my side. Struggled to not snack and had eaten a very light lunch, anticipating a larger dinner, but we went another route - so it was on track and ate 60% of it and left the rest for tomorrow's lunch, I hope. Forgot it in the fridge today when I was prepping my lunch (very light, hopefully not TOO light). Dinner will be out and I plan to enjoy all of the salad and half of the entree. I think DH will take the remainder in for his dinner tomorrow night, as he heads into working nights now.

Testing continues on my mom; hopefully they can identify what the issue is. Perhaps a skeletal crew there over the holiday weekend meant less speed on results? I don't know but am keeping fingers crossed that they can figure this out and her pain dissipates.

Anticipate checking in with credits from smart eating tonight. Indulgent - a bit, but not supremely so. Won't see DH for a week after tonight. I leave him with reminders for all of the basics. Be sure to snuggle the cats. Be sure to fill all pets' water bowls. And food bowls. And...and...and I'm sure he's thinking he married a dingbat.

maryann 12-02-2013 12:24 PM

Good Morning, Coaches.

Happy for a beautiful, sunny day. Sad that we have no rain here. It is very troubling to DH.Yesterday I marked a milestone: the first time time I have driven a tractor. if DS was going to do it, I would do it, as well. OP yesterday even though my salad after a movie was larger than hoped.

Credit step class today and a food plan. I want to be really disciplined for the next three days because Wednesday evening I am taking a girl's trip to Disneyland to celebrate my 50th bday. I want to enjoy every minute without worrying about my deadline date on the 20th. I have been mulling over options. The first was to take my small blender with me for smoothies. When I called the airport to see if I can take it as carryon, I received a rather nebulous answer. DH who was listening suggested I didn't call it the "Magic Bullet" :)

So now I am going to the health food store today took look at protein supplement options. I know I can't take liquid. But I really want to replace at least one meal with a smoothie/shake and one meal with nitrate free jerky, fruit and nuts. One meal at a restaurant is all I can safely do. i know that from experience. Well I have a few days to plan.

BBE: Thoughts of you as DS and I cracked pecans at the barn. I will be dry roasting them today for my trip.

Wave to all.

LoseToAll 12-02-2013 12:45 PM

Totally lost it during the holiday weekend but I am back on track today. Just said oh well and make a plan for today.

Fast day today. Will have healthy 500 calorie meal for lunch.

Reading response cards. Helps so much.

Hope you are all having a good day.

pamatga 12-02-2013 01:08 PM

Day Fifteen-Monitor Your Eating
Day Fifteen-Monitor Your Eating: Now, in the pink book, this is the point where Dr. Beck feels that all of the prep days leading up to this day allows you to start your food plan and exercise program along with the skills she has shared thus far. Well, since I wanted to have an "OP" Thanksgiving, I jumped the gun and started last Monday along with counting my points.

As I shared yesterday, I have been logging every day this past year. It is a habit that I began in June 2010 and although I have ceased doing it for as long as six months at a time, I always return to it. I save all of them on a zip drive. What I am going to do with them, I have no idea, but I have them. My initial rationale is different than Dr. Beck's. I am a recovering food addict and one hallmark character defect of mine is denial and lying to myself about "what, when and how much I eat" so in order to work on that particular defect of mine I log every single bite that I eat. I measure everything. I always and only measure one single serving. I want my stomach, eyes and mouth to know what a single serving of any and everything is.

I put it on a "normal" dinner plate (this goes against conventional weight loss wisdom- large vs small plates) because my rationale is that not every place I will eat at will have the option of a smaller plate and short of bringing my own, I feel that it is absolutely necessary that I know visually what food looks on a regular sized plate. This is immensely helpful in restaurant or social gatherings.

This may sound extreme to many of you but it is something that has allowed me to go from 301.8 lbs to my present weight and although I have had a rocky six months prior to rejoining this group, I continued monitoring my food even though I wasn't on plan the majority of the time. If it went into my mouth, it got noted on my daily meal plan. If I had a binge, every bit of it got logged. I was not going to put my head in the sand and ignore what was going on. I liken it to watching someone you love suffering and you feel helpless to ease their pain. I have learned also to love "that person" (me) and although I was suffering emotionally I never lost my love and respect for "that person" (me).:hug:

So, I want to say that I am grateful and at peace that I have picked back up consciously this BDS. I did not realize that I had been practicing some of the skills. I feel lead to be here. I am grateful that I listened to that small inner voice to admit that there "is a better way" and here it is. :cp:

Do I get tired of doing some of this stuff? Yes, I do! Will I stop? No, not if I can help it. I realize that each and every one of us has a different personal history with food so some of this may resonant and some may not. For me, this is not just a number on the scale but I was food-oriented for half of my adult life so I have a lot of underlying issues that come to surface once I am not eating to cover them up.

My life is still the same struggles that I have been going through the past six months but I am working both my OA program as well as using the BDS to move through them until they get straightened out. That is the difference between today and back then.:D

CeeJay Good Job on being OP for four days. :bravo: You can do it!

seadwaters Great Job on getting your personal goal of 5000 steps in. :running:

BBE I took dance during my childhood and youth. I miss dancing but with the need of two new knees on the horizon my only outlet is vicariously watching DWTS. I applaud you taking dancing lessons. I have held this over my DH that once I get my new knees, he is coming along. He is afraid of making a spectacle of himself as a non-dancer but he does watch DWTS with me. I love him for that.:love:

Joy(gardenerjoy): Congrats on making your November exercise goal.:woops:

ForMyGirls: I only shared about my struggles with perfectionism because that is one character defect that I have been working on for some time. My DH is the same way so you can only imagine our household at times. Lots of discussions on how to do things from time to time. Thank you, Joy, for sharing what works for you. I agree that our bodies can sometimes be strange creatures where what we think works doesn't and what does work, we didn't think would.

I will continue to be a part of this streak challenge because it also does double-duty in forcing me to do what I can over and over again; it is building on daily successes "one meal at a time and one day at a time" which is clearly on my own personal radar.

I can add one more point to my first seven days so my weekly count for Monday-Sunday is 7 pts for food plan and 6 pts for working out. 13 pts for Week 1. Although I had regained a couple of pounds the week prior to that; I managed to lose overall 4.2 lbs. :goodscale since last Monday when I began actively staying OP as well as working out.

Granted, this is water weight but what is even nicer is that I feel like I am personally back "on track". My "fat head" is under my thumb. That makes it a winning week for me! No yo-yo up and downs now that I am actively practicing BDS.

Hope everyone else who is reading or checking in has a great day as well.

Take care, Pam :comp:

MikeB 12-02-2013 04:59 PM

Good Evening, Coaches,

We all aim to read our Cards. Do you Coaches read them just when things are quiet, when you have time, when you're not under stress? If so, then how do you respond, or react, to a sudden challenge? For instance, suppose - without warning - you're offered, or find yourselves looking at, a favourite delicacy. Do you reach for your pack, shuffle through it, find the appropriate card and recite it, like a charm to ward off evil? And, if so, does that work? Or do you have a different tactic? Do you perhaps pick from a memorised list of slogans? "NO CHOICE" would be an obvious one, but do you have any others?

:congrat: to all you North Americans who survived Thanksgiving. Hope you get some R&R in time for Christmas!


GosfordGirl 12-03-2013 04:54 AM

Good evening coaches

I almost didn't log on. I turned off the computer to get away from work and have to log in on my iPad. I have logged on 4 days straight -credit moi.

From tomorrow I will post in the morning because I think it will suit my lifestyle better.

Mike B - I use the cards to note important aspects of my program and approach. By reading my RC etc I am planting the seeds for desirable behaviour so that when I am confronted by a tricky situation I can call to mind a useful response - without having to drag out the actual cards. It will be interesting to see what others say to your question!

I am currently trying to abide by a fairly extreme version of my diet plan to entrench the behaviours again. I was reasonably successful today but found myself having a teaspoon of coconut sugar after dinner! Otherwise on plan.

Checked in 3 days in a row - credit
+.02(today) / -1.2 from tracker
Planned food and ate 90% according to plan
Planned but didn't pack lunch for tomorrow. Am having a canteen lunch that I have planned for. Hamburger plus salad, no bun. Apple
Logged food for today and plan for tomorrow

ForMyGirls 12-03-2013 05:56 AM

Hello coaches,

I am back on the score board today. Giving myself lots of credit for doing my exercise even though it was 9pm before I was able to! I so couldn't face posting a zero streak AGAIN tonight.

Team total today is 42! I wonder if we'll crack 50 this week?

Maryann - I loved your driving a tractor milestone. Worth putting down as a "thing to do before 50" I reckon :-)

Pam - what you said about the "being on track" being important so resonated. While the number on the scale matters the reward of it is so transitory. The bit in this process where I get real contentment is when I know I am "in the zone".

MikeB - I try to read my cards every morning (it is one if the 'exercise and Wellbeing' tasks required to be OP for the day. Like Seadwaters - I don't physically pull out the cards when faced with tricky situations - but daily reminders of my responses means they pop into my brain more easily. Sometimes they do pop in as the words on the cards but more often it is something pretty generic (but crucial) like "this matters" or "you're worth it".

I have a work function tomorrow evening that requires "frocking up" - which is a rare occurrence in my life. Was nice this evening to pull out the few fancy clothes I have and discover I had options, rather than just one that fitted. My girls had fun helping me decide which one to wear (though I declined their recommendation to wear the red shoes (which they were right, look great, but are crippling)).

BillBlueEyes 12-03-2013 06:27 AM

Diet Coaches/Buddies – 13 day streak on plan, CREDIT moi. Also completed four straight days of left over turkey for both lunch and dinner! That was fun. I do love leftover turkey. Finished off about five containers from last Thursday; the fridge begins to look normal again. Afternoon and evening were the difficult times when I heard the cry for snacks. It was telling that the cry wasn't for a specific, small snack, but rather for my hand in DW's jar of tree nuts - the whole hand.

Exercise was a pair of walks, CREDIT moi, as well as a walk to the library to return David and Goliath. As I expected, I was annoyed with his redundant writing style as well as his know-it-all style. Perhaps I should take pleasure that his book reminded me that many people grow from adversity.

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Yay for seamlessly starting streaks over again.

Cheryl (seadwaters) – Kudos for trying different diet plans to find what you need. Neat that you can make eating out work, "Am having a canteen lunch that I have planned for."

Pam (pamaga) – Thanks for the thoughts about plate size - interesting that one goal is to learn what moderate portions look like on the plates we'll face outside our own homes.

maryann - LOL at don't "call it the "Magic Bullet"" at the airport - although it seems appropriate to take your Magic Bullet to the Magic Kingdom. Drooling at the thought of a pan of fresh dry roasted pecans. (Noting to myself that I'm not drooling for a moderate serving, but for a pan, LOL.)

nationalparker – Kudos for "ate 60% of it and left the rest" - stopping can be hard. Hope your mom's tests are going well.

ForMyGirls - Thanks for doing this collective streak thing. Perfectionism is a problem for me, also; particularly the point when I fall off the perfect path and then have to sheepishly step back on. Beck speaks eloquently about getting back on track; we call all read that if we get skunked by falling off our streaks. Hope you made it to sleep on time last night.

MikeB - It works for me to read my ARC's in the morning. When challenges arise, I have to work from memory. "NO CHOICE," and "Not About Me," are my weapons of choice.

LoseToAll - Back on track are, indeed, the magic words of success.

Readers -

day 8 Create Time and Energy

what are you thinking?
If you, too, have set unreasonable rules for yourself, you might find it difficult to make changes. Ask yourself, Do I truly have control over my schedule? Am I over burdened with responsibilities? Do I feel as if my life is just too complicated? Don't decide that changes are impossible, though, until you've consulted with you diet coach. While your best shot at weight loss is to do the Beck Diet Solution program as suggested, you and your coach might decide that it's better for you to incorporate the steps more gradually.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 105.

gardenerjoy 12-03-2013 10:00 AM

My 100%OP Day makes my streak count = 8.

I wrote a Christmas treat on my plan for today, so we'll see how that goes.

I have an event tonight, but I'm going to pretend they aren't serving food. I love that I go to these things for something other than the food, now. That used to be the main event for me.

There's a big exciting, but currently under wraps, thing going on in my life right now. Credit for not eating over it. And for getting the work done when I tell people I'll do it.

WI: +0.15 kg, Exercise: +45 90/1400 minutes for December, Food: 100%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

MikeB: I read my cards every day and, over time, they have sunk into my brain so they come up at the odd moments I need them. It helps, too, to read how other people use these slogans in our group. Sometimes I'll have a moment that reminds me of what someone else experienced here and I'll remember that they said NO CHOICE or Hunger is Not an Emergency or That's Not About Me.

Lexxiss 12-03-2013 10:15 AM

Hi Coaches!

I continue to read here daily, and most important, I continue to work my Beck program and stay as close as I can to OP. Not much advance planning these days, but I make it a priority to have our home stocked with healthy foods which makes the decision making process easier. I weigh everyday and stay within my maintenance range. credit. I continue to focus on Veganbefore6 and have noticed it has really curtailed unplanned snacking at work. I havent had a bite of any of the holiday goodies being brought in because I really "think" those items through. Yay!

I am enjoying following the progress of our "streakers" here. Credit to all.

GosfordGirl 12-03-2013 01:50 PM

Wednesday AM
Good morning coaches

This is a quick check in to switch posting to the mornings where I can report on the day before and plan for the day.

Credit for being back on the scoreboard FormyGirls. I will be pleased when I want to "frock up" again. That is a great streak that both GardenerJoy and BillBE have going. I need to keep focus and maintain consistency to get up a head of steam. Not sure I am aiming for a turkey streak though. That might send me to the nut jar as well.

Checked in 4 days in a row
-.4(today) / -1.8 from tracker
4.4/3 (same as last night);
Planned food and ate 90% according to plan
Having a canteen lunch that I have planned for. Hamburger plus salad, no bun. Apple

LuLu01801 12-03-2013 03:24 PM

Blast From The Past!!
hi there, does anybody remember me?
I pop in and read your posts from time to time.
enjoying seeing some of you putting perfect OP days together.
I wanna do it too!!
can I join you?

p.s. just dusted off my pink book and I'm re-reading it.

pamatga 12-03-2013 03:37 PM

Day Sixteen: Prevent Unplanned Eating
Day 16: Prevent Unplanned Eating: I see that Dr. Beck's food plan has a model of writing out your food plan first and then at the end of the day checking off the foods that you didn't eat and then adding in the foods that you did eat.

I don't do my food plan that way. Like many of us, I am a creature of habit so I pretty well know ahead of time what I will eat for most meals. However, when I depart from that to a certain extent is when I dine out. The way that I have learned to handle that is to frequent the same restaurants so I know their menus really well and I know exactly what I will eat prior to ordering. However, yesterday broke my streak. :( I had my food plan already configured and I went to a restaurant we have frequented for ten years.

Since we were eating between lunch and dinner menus, what I had pre-planned was not available for another hour so I had to make a change in my meal on the spot. It caused me to go over in my calories for the day. The primary reason being how the food was served and not having pre-configured the calories in them. I have been thinking today how I might have handled that differently since this BDS is also about problem-solving.

MikeB I do not physically read my ARC cards (from 18 months or so ago) simply because I have them memorized. I did reread them recently and nothing has changed in both my reasons for losing weight, the problems that I still encounter that are probably unique to me and how to go about losing the extra weight as well as maintaining that weight loss. I am sure that many here would echo that. I am "home alone" all day so I know enough to stay out of the kitchen unless it is meal or snack time. I have to create structure into my life because it is a blank page. I am semi-retired, which I love, but it does bring its own particular challenges.

Like many others here, I have a couple of chosen phrases as my "mantras" that I use. "No deep fried, no bread or rolls and no unplanned dessert items." is the one I use the most when scanning a menu. I now need to add, "no sauces or cheese." as well. Or I was thinking that maybe the four Bs " Baked, Broiled and Bare Bones." That should help make the food choices easy to make when in a pinch. So, this is (like so many things in life) a "work in progress".

My strategy is keeping myself on a "short lease". It is boring and sounds lackluster--no magic bullets here I am afraid. I once read a quote about war but I think it also applies to the "battle of the bulge" : "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." I have accepted that this is something that I will do until my dying breathe although I may skip logging my food plan the day before my last day...we'll see..:D

So, ForMyGirls, I am back to square one with one point. I did do my free weight workouts while watching "Santa Clause" with Tim Allen last night.
I love to exercise, even sore muscles, and I got DH to join me since he too is now experiencing arthritis in his left knee. It is an occupational hazard I am sure.

All, great job on keeping on task, no matter what that might be.

Take care, Pam :comp:

P.S. :welcome3: Lulu. I too have returned after a long while. It now feels like home. Great group of Beck enthusiasts here. I too am re-reading the pink book. I am about 2 weeks in.

nationalparker 12-03-2013 09:30 PM

Hey LuLu - good to see your smiling face back here! Darn, I sure would have liked to be able to say I stuck with it and am close to my goal :) But still plugging away...

LONG workday today for me. Rushed home, scarfed down some leftovers from last night (did good at dinner, eating more than a third but less than half of my entree ... but in all honesty, it was LARGE) ... still have more leftovers remaining from the dinner, so will leave those for DH. Packing and doing laundry and worrying about my trip. Tomorrow looks fine but they're saying it's dicey getting out on Thursday due to the winter storm. I'm a big one on not borrowing worry, but boy oh boy I want to get home to my family in Florida. Mom was discharged yesterday evening and sounded okay when we spoke for a few minutes, then she got sick all of a sudden.

Flight is at 6 a.m., so alarm is set for 3:30 a.m. to get rolling and to the airport by 5, so just a brief note here.

+1 for me - stuck to my plan of leaving much of my entree last night - and today it's been a no-snacking day!

maryann 12-03-2013 09:38 PM

Good Evening, Coaches.

Well I proved two Beck principles this week. The first is that it DOES take tremendous amounts of time to eat healthy. I searched and searched the health food store to find my breakfasts and second meals for my trip to Disneyland. I literally bought an item, took it outside and tried it to decide if it was tolerable. I am hear to tell you, lots of "health" foods are yucky! Finally I found a terrific, airport friendly alternative to my usual breakfast: a travel pack of Justin's almond butter on top of a Kind bar - 10 grams of protein, fiber and tasty. Second meals will be nitrate free beef jerky, dark chocolate and homemade roasted pecans. It took me another hour to put everything in individual servings and then group in ziplocks. But it is done. Now I can relax and know two meals are already committed everyday. I can enjoy a fresh fruit snack and a restaurant meal everyday, as well.

Second Beck principle:The more you exercise your resistance muscle, the stronger it gets. I was desperate for sweets to take the edge off at work. But I resisted for hours. usually a craving will dissipate. Not this one. Five minutes before I left, I told myself "Well now you are leaving, you can take some with you." Good gravy. I did not and I can say I was OP today. No way would that have happened three months ago. I couldn't put two sweet-free days together.

Mike: I have my advantage cards typed in my reminder ap on my phone. They pop up everyday.
Pamatga: I like your other definition of Magic Bullet and agree there are none to be found with me and food.
LuLu: Of course we remember you. Welcome back.
Lexxiss: Huge credit for staying away from the ample holiday offerings being brought in.
BBE: Now, I find leftover turkey dry. What is your secret?
Formygirls: I bought a new "frocking" item and it is in my lowest size ever - fabulous silvery pants. Quite exciting.

BillBlueEyes 12-04-2013 06:55 AM

Diet Coaches/Buddies – 14 day streak on my eating plan, CREDIT moi. First day without leftover turkey since Thanksgiving. I miss it already. DW told me that Whole Foods had a sale on turkey parts, "Do you want any?" Of course not, for now. But I don't regret those four days of lunch and dinner of turkey. I only regret that we ran out of her homemade cranberry sauce - an uncooked variety made with an old hand grinder with whole oranges.

Did gym, CREDIT moi, including the exercise class with the Zumba instructor who tones it down for us non-Zumbanians. Can't believe that I don't tire of working out to 'Y-M-C-A' in the background; she makes the hand motions part of the movement.

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Neat idea to "pretend they aren't serving food" - can't wait to hear how that goes.

Debbie (Lexxiss) – This planning thing seems to make a difference, per your, "I really "think" those items through."

Cheryl (seadwaters) – Kudos for four days in a row checking in as well as beating your steps goal of 5000 steps. Love reading, "Hamburger plus salad, no bun. Apple" after reading that as your published plan from the day before.

Pam (pamaga) – Thanks for "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom" applied to our eating plan. LOL at "may skip logging my food plan the day before my last day" while wondering how you're going to manage to figure out when it's that day.

maryann - Just an amazing Sabotaging Thought after a day of sanity, "Well now you are leaving, you can take some with you." Blows my mind. Kudos for seeing through it. What a superb job of panning and constructing meals that will make your Disneyland trip an eating-plan success. [The secret is to grow fond of dry turkey, LOL.]

nationalparker – Waving toward your plane on its way to Florida. Glad to hear that your mom was discharged - hope that's the beginning of recovery. Kudos for leaving more than half of your entree.

Lulu (LuLu01801) – Of course you can join in. We particularly welcome your re-reading the Pink Book since we all benefit from fresh perspectives.

Readers -

day 8 Create Time and Energy

what are you thinking?
Here are some other common sabotaging thoughts and helpful responses. If any are similar to your own thoughts, make Response Cards to help you.

Sabotaging Thought: I'm a spontaneous person. I don't like to schedule my time.
Helpful Response: To lose weight, I have to give up some spontaneity. I wish I didn't have to, but that's the way it is - at least for now. Until I've developed a routine, I can't rely on spontaneous shopping and spontaneous food preparation. But that doesn't mean that I can't be spontaneous in other ways.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 105.

gardenerjoy 12-04-2013 10:16 AM

My 100%OP Day streak count is back to 0. :( I probably should have known that we would go out to eat after the event no matter what I wrote on my plan. Lesson learned.

The event was our member night at the Missouri Botanical Garden annual Christmas show. New this year, they have lights out in the garden. So pretending there was no food was easy. I was out walking and playing with my camera, far away from the food.

WI: -0.4 kg, Exercise: +65 155/1400 minutes for December, Food: 80%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

Welcome back, LuLu01801!

LuLu01801 12-04-2013 11:58 AM

Thanks for the warm welcome back!!
I read chapter 1, The Key To Success.
and I took the following notes from that chapter:
  • A slip is a temporary mistake, not a sign to give up.
  • Expect rough patches, plan for them, and persevere.
  • Challenges will gradually diminish until eating differently is just a way of life.
  • I can learn how to talk back to my sabotaging thoughts convincingly.
  • A cheat can be just a little unplanned eating that can be no big deal at all.​
  • To use appropriate eating behaviors consistently and permanently, ya gotta change your thinking.
  • Prepare for challenging moments and have "helpful thoughts" prepared ahead of time, written down, of thoughts I can think to myself when the challenge is here.

These are the things that jumped out at me as useful to have handy.
I hope they help you too!!


pamatga 12-04-2013 01:14 PM

Day Seventeen: End Overeating
Day 17: End Overeating As I said earlier that some of these days were going to be easier than others. The past three days in the pink book says it all about my whole reason for being here. For me, eating mindfully and slowly is easy. However, how I define "overeating" has changed quite a bit over the past several years, which makes me wonder if this is one area that I am going to have to tweak right up to my end goal weight as well as into maintenance. I am beginning to think so. So, I definitely like Dr. Beck's definitions at the time being because they can be taken into account the physical sensation of being full vs. a specific amount of calories. However, it really does mean being in touch constantly with your stomach, your appetite and your desire to continue to eating beyond the feeling of fullness. This is definitely about self-awareness in a way that many major diet plans do not even scratch the surface on.

I had a major meltdown yesterday regarding one of the darkest clouds that has been hanging over my life for the past six months and I had the most frightening realization that it may take longer than I had previously thought before it moves on. I was angry, scared and confused. Up until I rejoined this group, I had allowed this 'set of circumstances' derail me with my food plan. I love to exercise, in spite of my RA, and I kept that up for the majority of that time but my food plan was so hit and miss. I was really feeling demoralized when I arrived here. I had not lost a pound since mid-June although I also had not gained more than 2-3 lbs. either. Credit moi for that.

However, with this 'a-ha' moment last night, I realized that I am going to be in for the fight of my life regarding both my ability to hold it together and continue to lose weight as I both need and want to. So, I have also come to the acute realization that I need this BDS more than ever. :book2: I am exactly where I need to be. No doubt about it!

I credit myself for making a much better choice for dinner last night and doing my cardio later. So, ForMGirls, I now have 2 points since I had to re-start over this past Monday.

maryann You said it so well about how to both exercise your resistance muscle as well as the importance in doing so. I also belong to a couple other online weight loss support threads/groups and, time and time again, I keep coming back to those who "fail to plan, plan to fail." We can not allow ourselves to be like innocent sheep going to slaughter simply because we did not understand the significance of this concept. Those people who have successfully lost weight and kept it off know this deep in their bones.

Joy(gardenerjoy): Your night at the Botanical Gardens sounds just lovely. I so agree with what you said about just pretending the food doesn't exist. It is using "denial" in a positive way. I have done the same thing when faced with such insurmountable odds in my life that I thought I would never be able to overcome them. I call it putting "blinders on" (like how horses wear) and keeping my objective always in mind, looking forward, not back nor sideways.

Debbie R (lexxiss): It all starts in our mind; both the defeat as well as the success. Think. Believe. Act. You got it down. Good job!:yay:

Cheryl(seadwaters): Great Job on the stepping :running: as well as 4 days of OP.

lulu Thanks for all of the insights. I agree with BBE that all of you are both my peers as well as my teachers. :welcome: back again. I was here about two years ago, tried other things, learned some things, and ready to really push to my end goal weight: maintenance by Thanksgiving Day 2014.

Take care all, Pam :comp:

ForMyGirls 12-04-2013 03:04 PM

I typed this up last night but it didn't send so trying again ...

Hello coaches,

36 points on the board for us all tonight. Yay to us all.

It was touch and go for me today but I squeaked it in for an OP day. Had intended to have 2 of my weekly indulgences available tonight so that I could have a glass of wine and dessert at the function tonight but the plan was scuttled by last night's gelato expedition with the kids. Spent the drive there tonight debating inside my head as to whether I could edit my plan to increase my "indulgences" and thereby be OP???? Because I really didn't want to report in with zero tonight. Fortunately I was greeted on arrival by a drinks tray with orange juice at which point Joy's "alcohol OR dessert" strategy surfaced and I remembered how much more I like dessert than wine. So very pleased with myself for having a booze free night and being OP.

Also very stoked that tonight that I won an award for my work:-) Even more stoked that it comes with a small amount of cash attached. At any other time it would be the recognition that mattered most but it has been a very difficult year financially so it is huge relief to know that my little people won't have to wonder why Santa suddenly got so stingy!

Lulu - lovely to meet you and delighted to have you join in the streaking. My elder daughter's in utero name was Lulu so seeing your name brought a special smile to my face :-)

LuLu01801 12-04-2013 03:45 PM

am I missing something?
what is all this mention of earning points?
do we have a point system in place for our streaking?

nationalparker 12-04-2013 04:24 PM

Checking in from Tulsa, OK. Work is done for the day, and folks here have been really urging me to try to fly out tonight before the ice tomorrow, but I cannot rig up a flight to get out to Florida, via ANYWHERE, apparently. So ... I will keep my fingers crossed and get the rental car gassed up, returned and to the airport early tomorrow morning for a mid-morning flight. I'll be the silly person who shows up HOURS before her flight because I'm nervous about driving on icy roads. :) I am trusting that my good karma will hold out and I'll get home to my folks tomorrow.

I'm struggling about feeling that I deserve something indulgent tonight for dinner. That's been my thought this afternoon ... WHY do I think this way? I've counted up my calories today (lunch with the people I had to meet with was Mexican - left part of it, which was hard). If I go light tonight, I'm STILL on track. But it has to be pretty light :) I will have enough difficulty remaining within my calorie goals while at home. Food is all around, and I seek out what isn't. A slice of American cheese? Sure. ... Hmm... what's this? Oh, I'll try that. My mantra will be, "I'm here to help THEM, not help myself."

I weighed this morning and was up but feel confident that my choices had been wise with limited snacking, just the restaurant meal that was split into three, and I'm sure was sodium-filled.

Thanks, Lulu, for those "takeaways" ... I needed to see them today. I've put them on a computer sticky note to read when I log on. The points are for every day that we are OP (whatever we each decide is OP - some are +1 for eating OP and +1 for activity ... others are 90% or more OP is +1, etc. - whatever works for you) ...

Bill - You've been the mad streaker - good job! Our leftover turkey will probably now spoil because I forgot to freeze it and DH is prepping his own meals, none of which will include the turkey, but rather Trader Joe's frozen meals while I'm gone. I teased him to not buy several at once, because everyone who saw the cart would think I didn't make him good meals.

PamAtGa - I have thoroughly enjoyed your review of each chapter - I've not had the time to pull my book out and commit to reading each chapter, so your check-ins have been invaluable.

GosfordGirl 12-04-2013 09:33 PM

Checking in a little later than morning - but 5 days in a row!

My food yesterday was on plan - and my food logging showed I was 89 calories over - good enough. My exercise also reached the goals set. So a good day. Today is shaping up as on plan but more of that in the morning

Welcome LuLu - I will leave it to ForMyGirls to explain the streak challenge - her great idea. Essentially it is about trying to achieve a streak of successes in one or several goals without being overwhelmed by perfectionism. Great job maryann in preparing for travel - I would do well to be as thorough. Had to smile at BillBE lip and hand synching to Y-M-C-A - that would be one good workout. Great 14day streak. Commiserations Gardenerjoy - I am sure your 100% streak served the purpose of realigning your plan. Christmas lights and snow sound so exotic to us Australians. Hang in there Pam (pamatga) - seems you have all the tools you need for that fight of your life. Ouch that you can't trust your usual restaurant not to provide your usual menu. Congratulations ForMyGirls, for the award AND passing up the wine to celebrate it with. Major kudos. Hope the trip home goes well nationalparker.

Checked in 5 days in a row
-.4 lb again (today) / -2.2 lb from tracker (in onederland again :) )
4.3/3 (same as last night);
Planned food and ate according to plan

BillBlueEyes 12-05-2013 05:19 AM

Diet Coaches/Buddies – 15 day streak of on-plan eating, CREDIT moi. I am so grateful for this streak diversion. It helped me last night as I spent two hours with friends around a table laden with eight (I counted them) different snack foods and six beverages. I chose to take nothing - not a thing - partially feeling smug that I could report my streak unbroken. I didn't even take the bubbly water since I wasn't thirsty and was happy without servicing my desire to constantly put something in my mouth.

Exercise was two walks, CREDIT moi. I dressed warmly for the bitter cold; it wasn't cold so I overheated. When I think of myself as outdoors, I wear the kind of layers that are easily shed into my backpack. When I think of myself in the city, the layers aren't as easily shed. Oh Well.

Joy (gardenerjoy) – You always make the Missouri Botanical Garden sound fun. Kudos for enjoying it sufficiently to ignore the food - I gotta remember that.

Cheryl (seadwaters) – Congrats on "in onederland again." Kudos for on plan with both food and exercise.

Pam (pamatga) – Sending supportive thoughts as you face the reality of "one of the darkest clouds" with Kudos for recognizing that your eating plan must also continue as you face it.

nationalparker – Waving toward Tulsa, OK hoping that you're on an airplane out of there. Love your mantra, "I'm here to help THEM, not help myself." Super Kudos for recognizing that you're making wise choices rather than worrying about scale jitter.

Lulu (LuLu01801) – Thanks for the notes. Today I'm struck by the big obvious, "ya gotta change your thinking." Need to remember that it doesn't seem obvious when I want to waddle about my old ruts. Yep, ForMyGirls is maestro of this streak business. I'm using it to help counter a recent excursion into off-plan snacks.

ForMyGirls - Congrats for that award for your work. A little cash always seems to increase the credibility of the recognition. Kudos for making the choice between wine and dessert.

Readers -

day 8 Create Time and Energy

what are you thinking?
Here are some other common sabotaging thoughts and helpful responses. If any are similar to your own thoughts, make Response Cards to help you.

Sabotaging Thought: I don't have the time to do the steps in this program.
Helpful Response: It might be more accurate to say that I'm not willing to make the time. If I had to get a blood transfusion every day to keep myself alive, obviously I'd find the time. While being overweight isn't necessarily life threatening, I still need to make a serious commitment if I want to diet successfully. I need to look at my Advantages Response Card again and judge whether I really want to lose weight.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 105.

ForMyGirls 12-05-2013 06:08 AM

Hello coaches,

I am not sure whether pavlova is known outside Australia - but for those who do know of it I think you will be as proud of me as I am proud of myself for saying "actually I'll just have some fruit salad" and my work Xmas party today. I did eat past full at dinner tonigt which means sadly I am back to zero even after declining wine and one of the world's top 5 desserts. But hey - 6 months ago I would have had all 3! Plus it is kinda cool that being past full feels uncomfortable now and not just normal.

Another credit also for getting my morning walk even though I "really didn't want to" and despite that our heat wave suddenly turned freezing and it would have been very easy to say I'm too cold.

Despite my transgressions out group tally remains wonderfully high - 38. Go team. Looking forward to helping it climb some more tomorrow.

Lulu - the others have done some good explaining - but just to add my two cents worth - the deal is if you want to be in the streaking then you pick a habit you want to create - it is really up to you what you set and how much wriggle room you want in it. Then when you post you let us know how many days in a row you have achieved your goal. I then add up everyone's points to see what our total points are. The theory is we're each working individually so stay on track but at the same time contributing to a collaborative goal. Does that make sense yet? I think the tentative plan is to keep it going till early January. Speaking for myself I think it will be good to have this extra incentive to get me through the constant stream of 'events' that is the Christmas season.

gardenerjoy 12-05-2013 10:13 AM

My 100%OP Day streak count is up to 1.

It was a weird day, though. I didn't write my plan until mid-morning, which happened to be after a big disappointment. So, I wrote an unusual lunch and snack on my plan, treats. It worked in that it compartmentalized things so it didn't trigger binges or cravings. But, at the end of the day, I decided I would have been better off with a long walk and my normal food. Good to know.

WI: +0.65 kg, Exercise: +45 200/1400 minutes for December, Food: 100%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

pamatga 12-05-2013 12:14 PM

Day Eighteen:Change Your Definition of Full
Before I make a comment about this day I am "working"; I wanted to share with all of you why I started doing this in the first place. First of all, believe or not, even though I still remember many of you from my stint before a couple of years ago, I felt somewhat tongue-tied just jumping back in the dialogues mid-stream so for me, it just started as the proverbial "ice breaker". After I hit the last day (which I think is Day 41) then I will just post which skill I am working on at that time and how I am doing with it; although, by the looks of it already it might be a handful I will be juggling.

Day 18: Change Your Definition of Full: I was just thinking about this last night and this morning. In the distant past, I have joined many different weight loss programs, some costing in the thousands with no guaranteed results either. The one thing that strikes me as I am re-reading this book is how so many of those programs hand you their plan (usually one size fits all too) and then the expectation is that you will lose weight on that, showing up once a week for a weigh in.

Now, I am speaking from my experiences in a decade or so ago so things may have changed but I do not recall anyone ever giving me the tools (and that is what BDS does) to deal with the different kinds of situations that I might find myself in. I remember asking this once while following a nationally known weight loss program (that advertises on t.v. all the time with famous celebrities) and the contact person just told me "do as we tell you to do". I did but it did not guarantee that the weight that I did lose would not return, which it did.

Repeated banging your head against a wall is very demoralizing and I have done my share of that. It reminds me of the definition of insanity, " doing the same thing over but expecting different results." Well, the day the "insanity stops" is the day you start to do things differently. If I can pinpoint one specific thing that I like about this book and what Dr. Beck outlines is that if you want "different results" (which, of course, we all do) then we need to do things differently. Then, she sets about showing what that is.

The first time that I read this book I was taken aback by how direct and almost blunt Dr. Beck "comes across" but since reading other books on the same subject, I now really appreciate her "no nonsense, tell-it-like-it-is" directives. Many of these other books are even on the best sellers list; however, they hem and haw and try to obscure some of the truths that are self-evident in this book. I think they are just plain afraid of telling people that the primary and only function that food should have in our lives is to fuel our body to perform at its best. It reminds me of a couple of lines from the movie "A Few Good Men": "I just want the truth" whereas the other character says, "You can't handle the truth." Well, Dr. Beck believes we can and we must.

I want to say that I have tried to incorporate these principles in diet groups that I have lead. I have not had the success that I had thought I would but I think that conversation says it best. It takes a certain level of wanting to face the truth about ourselves that many people that I have come to know, some very well, do not want to face about themselves. They would rather remain "where they are at". Period. I respect that although knowing that some of them are risking their health and that they are good friends makes it tough for me to watch. Still, one thing I learned in my 18 years of working the 12 Steps; we are all at different points in the same journey, some of which we may see on the other shore and can only "wish them well" once we "cross over". When this happens, I am always saddened by it initially but I have learned to let go their "recovery" to embrace my own.

I have come to a crossing where I am willing to give this program my absolute best. I will admit that when I read it before I didn't work the entire program as Dr. Beck lays out so I had "partial success". She addresses this early on and reminds people to not skip around using a hit or miss approach. I didn't listen then but I am now. It is also at this time, and it has been a long time in coming unfortunately, that I also want to face another equally persistent and troubling "addiction"; one that I also practiced "half-measures". I am really being tested and tried right now. However, I plan to use this BDS to navigate my way through so I do lose weight while I am dealing with the other "addiction". I can't wait to lose the weight and then deal with the other. The stress of not doing something is worse than dealing with it. Dr. Beck talks about the stress of debating on whether to give in vs not giving in and this is no different.

I will skip personals today since this has already gotten longer than I had planned. The past several days in her book are the key areas that I know I need to work on. This day in particular. However, I am here to say that it is doable and I have done it on more than one occasion.

ForMyGirls: I can add another point for working out: 3 thus far since Monday when I started over. My food plan has been healthy but I am still going over on calories so for me that means "off plan". It hasn't impacted my weight because I am working out. However, today I have decided that I am going to have to eliminate some food items from my meal plan "moving forward". Like others here, what "on plan" means for me does evolve over time. I adjust it when it is no longer meeting the objective that is at hand; which also changes from time to time. Now is that time.

Take care all, Pam :comp:

MikeB 12-05-2013 12:57 PM

Came across this, which seemed to fit me:

"If you’ve labeled yourself as a food addict, I suggest you retire this psychologically toxic concept from your mind. You’re a seeker of well-being who is still mastering the learning curve of moderation."


LuLu01801 12-05-2013 02:25 PM

Happy Thursday everybody!!
It's good to be back.
I read my ARCs this morning and hope to every morning.
Food is on track, feels good.
I'm doing damage control before the christmas damage!! :)
For today, I feel good, I feel on track and it's good to connect with you Becksters.

I'm so excited!!
Tonight is opening night at the high school for my son's play (he's a senior).
he's in A Streetcar Named Desire and he's playing Stanley.
they have been working hard on this for quite a while now and I'm anxious to see it tonight, proud mama that I am!!!!

nationalparker, Why do you feel like you “deserve something indulgent tonight”? It sounds like you are just craving. One of my ARC says “Craving. . . When I am craving, my mind is focused on getting food, not on getting thinner. That’s why I have to cement the reasons in my mind by reading my list every day”. Maybe you need to get out those cards and really sit with them and focus hard on your goals and visualize giving in and how you will feel and how much further you will be away from your goals.

seadwaters, Good job with reaching your goals!!! Question . . . what is “KM” in your stats?

Bill, 15 days straight of OP!!! WOW!!! And you had nothing to eat at that food laden table? You sure mean business!!! You are very motivating.

ForMyGirls, Good to see you giving yourself credit even though you are “back to zero”. I find it difficult to give myself credit unless I’m perfect and I want to change that about myself. Thanks for clarifying the challenge and point earnings. So I should pick one thing I want to focus on? Only one thing? And then each day that I do that one thing, I earn a point?

gardenerjoy, Congrats on 1 perfect 100% day!!!! Yeah, it usually turns out that a day of normal food is much more satisfying than a day of treats. I have an ARC that says “Satisfying Hunger . . . I will NEVER satisfy my hunger by eating junk food that provides no nutrition, so cut it out!!!” I'm sorta yelling at myself in this card!!! haha

pamatga, Years ago I was in OA myself. I lost 100 lbs there and have been gone for 10 years and have kept it off. I went to one meeting recently just to revisit it. Not quite sure I belong but it’s a wonderful fellowship.

mike, I would love to believe that I will master moderation. I always say I don’t have a moderate bone in my body. I’m either 100% or 0%. Even though I’ve been maintaining a normal size body for quite some time now, I’m always battling and it’s exhausting. I’m hoping to change my thinking with Beck Solutions so that I can have more peace.

have a great day, my friends.
I'll check in tomorrow!!

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