Question about times I struggle...

  • Hello Beckies,
    I have a quick question. I have noticed during times I'm struggling with eating, I don't have the right mindset to read my cards and abide by them. At that point in time I feel like I don't really care and I am almost "out of control". Do you all have any tips for these times? Does anyone else experience this? It's very easy to read the cards when I am of sound mind, but when I need them the most I don't use them

    Thanks,
    Oriana
  • I think even beyond the scope of Beck, this is a common problem for me. I'm a terrible procrastinator and when in school I would let things pile up until the point that I was making myself crazy and staying up until 4 am trying to finish two papers, homework, projects, etc all at once. It got to the point that in the middle of these crazy moments I would just have this attitude of wanting to stop and just forget about whatever I was doing and take a 0 for the assignment. I know it was the complete wrong attitude to have and luckily I managed to grit my teeth and get through it but that's probably the best advice I can give - just DO it.

    I suppose the line of thinking for me in a time like that would be "Even though I don't care right at this time, I will care later on that I went off plan." I can think of a thousand times individually when I just said to heck with it and ate whatever it was at the time and didn't care but now that I look back on it I do care and wished I had strengthened my resistance muscle by saying no and staying in control.
  • Hi,

    The question you ask is the one that was most important for me to answer. I knew that even if I understood what to do, the motivation to do it sometimes went out the window.

    My journey using Beck skills has taught me that Beck skills will work to solve this problem. Where I used to give in on a daily basis, then a weekly basis, then every few months, to now it is hardly ever. It took time, and what really helped me was to do these two things each time I gave in:
    ~ examine it afterwards - really think about what happened. How was I feeling, what triggered it, what did it feel like to overeat, did it solve the problem?
    ~ then forgive myself, get back on track as quickly as I could.
    Good luck on your journey.
    Woodland
  • Great suggestions by both Michi702 and Woodland.

    I have days when my resistance muscle is very strong then days when it's much weaker. I've been working with the Beck tools for over a year now and I certainly can see progress. For me, the best thing I can do is to keep committing to myself to practice these skills and when I don't, "get right back on track."

    I have put short mantras on my screensaver. Right now it says, "It's Serious". I change it periodically and it's just an extra reminder for me that it's so important that I keep using the Beck tools.
  • Thank you all very much. I see that with practice and patience it will become easier to turn to the Beck skills and be like "second nature". I will keep working on it! Thanks again
  • Well, this is something I write down in my journal daily. If I am willing to use these tools, it really helps.

    I have 'abbreviations' to approaches to not eat unplanned food. It's:

    The Six D's and ISNIR May seem silly but it helps me.

    Six D's:

    Distractions
    Drink Water
    Deep breathing
    Distance yourself from the food
    Don't Drive (to get the food you are craving)
    Destroy - I sometimes squirt dishwashing liquid on extra or food I can't resist

    ISNIR:
    Identify - is it hunger, desire or a craving
    Stand firm - put you foot down. Strengthen resistance muscle
    No Choice - you might not think your can resist that food. You are anxious about wanting that food. But, of course you can. No Choice is equal to RED LIGHT: would you go through a red light... no, of course. That is what no choice means too.
    Imagine how you'll fee after eating unplanned food.
    Remember why you are doing all this.

    Using these abbreviations, it helps me remember the techniques to get through it. I sometimes go through each 'letter'. By the time I repeat all these things, sometimes the craving goes away.