I'm going to a Wellness Fair for cancer survivors with my brother today. I'm a long term survivor. My brother (the same one who lost his significant other in December) was diagnosed with follicular lymphoma in July. It turns out that's a quite low key form of cancer, so he's not sure that he wants to be part of the survivor community in any significant way. Accompanying him to this Wellness Fair is a way to help him check it out to see if it would be helpful.

They're serving us lunch. It would seem like I ought to be able to count on a healthy lunch at a Wellness Fair wouldn't it? But I think I've seen on their flyers that they serve cookies at meetings, so I'm going prepared to leave half of my entree, focus on vegetables, and eat a tiny amount, if any, dessert.

WI: -0.3kg, Exercise: +70, 295/1550 minutes for March, Food: op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

Tgif
 

The Good :angel:
- Throughout the day, I identified satisfaction vs fullness while eating, and I stopped eating when satisfied - credit!
- Throughout the day, I identified hunger vs non-hunger before I ate – yep!
- Eat mindfully, enjoying every bite – credit!
- Give credit throughout the day for every positive eating behavior – yep!
- Tolerated non-hunger without eating – credit!
- Used resistance techniques – credit!
- Spontaneous exercise – yes!
- I posted here – yes!

The Bad, and the Ugly :no:
- Read the pink book – nope

Kim (bennyhannamama) I use this group as my diet coach. I know Beck thinks a single person is more effective, but I find this group is perfect for me. I too have anxiety issues as well and have used CBT to deal with it, but do need to take an anti-anxiety drug to sleep through the night. Since you have anxiety issues, it might reduce your anxiety to choose one item to ‘work’ on at a time. And once, you are no longer anxious about that item, pick another one to work on. It’ll be slower, but the skills might become more ingrained if you master them well. Just a thought…

gardenerjoy I love Japanese food... Hope the Wellness Fair is fun and useful.

shepherdess Kudos for continuing to work the Beck strategies and planning even after reaching your goal weight!

CeeJay Leaving work an hour early on Friday – happy weekend indeed! I like how you make walking a social event.

Nuxmaga Good luck at the craft show – both on the sales and food front. Can you get much exercise in when you are at a craft show?

Beverlyjoy I hope your back feels better today. Kudos for the drool-worthy restaurant meal! And for continuing to work on feeling full.

Bill Nominal on-plan day – sounded more than nominal to me… Kudos for resisting the food-pusher. The on-gong battle between the two of you never grows old…

Just wanted to report in and tell you that this morning I hit 20 pounds gone. Finally!!!

So I need to find a reward. And I need to take a few minutes to think about the fact that new lows often result in days of struggle for me. I have the weekend's eating planned out and lots to get done, so I am trying to just carry on.

Credit today so far for:

weighing in
reading advantage and response cards
eating a healthy breakfast of oat bran and berries.

:grouphug:

Ceejay, that is BRILLIANT! Well done! And of course you can get through the next few days - you have the tools and you know how to use them.

Hi there. Just reading through the new posts to this thread since my post of yesterday. Positive energy in this thread, my friends. We have many things to credit each other and ourselves for. Wow what a great way to start the day. Sending you all positive energy for the day (can you feel it coming up through your keyboard?:) ).


Midlifecrisis57----where are you?

Susan

Snow started falling in the late morning and didn’t stop until late afternoon. It’s not enough snow to get us stranded out here, but it was a good reminder that spring is here and I’m not ready. I stocked up on canned and frozen veggies and made sure the pantry is full of healthy staples, so I’m ready for whatever spring brings. I’m glad the snow came yesterday, since I wasn’t planning a run anyways. I did a quick weight workout. I was pretty tired and my rule is that I do about 15 min and if I’m still feeling tired I can quit. Usually I get in the zone and finish the workout, but yesterday, I was still feeling tired so I opted for some gentle yoga. I have discovered a new and interesting way to get spontaneous exercise. The ranch recently bought a “new” truck (it’s a 1970) that is basically the missing link between my husband’s ¾ ton truck and a semi. We’re using it to feed hay—we used to pull a trailer with my husband’s truck, but in the spring weather you spend more time going back for the tractor to pull the truck out of the mud/snow. I’ve been driving the hay truck, mostly because it’s so much fun to drive something so huge and my husband thinks it’s funny to see me behind the wheel. I get a leg workout on the stiff pedals; an arm workout trying to put it in gear; and because the seat doesn’t move forward, I get a surprising ab workout bouncing around on the edge of the seat.

I had a good food day yesterday. I’m trying to remind myself that my main Beck goal was to feel in control around food. My mind and body have always had an antagonistic relationship. My mind was like the overly-strict parent and my body was like the rebellious teenager, sneak out behind the parent’s back. Over past several months, working the Beck program, I felt like I was moving towards a more cooperative relationship and was beginning to learn that I don’t need to go on food benders if I actually feed my body. The Diet for Life meals were larger than what I was used to. I was sure I’d never lose weight on the program; so this was a huge revelation. Oddly, reaching my goal weight has brought back a lot of old food-fears and those old feelings that I need to be restrictive or I’m going to gain weight. So I’m back to working the Beck program in hopes that it will lead to a better mind/body relationship. I have to remember that food-fear and restriction is not control. It’s never worked for me in the past.

CeeJay, yay for another Beck day and getting away from work an hour early. Great job with a long list of credits. Huge congrats on 20 lbs gone forever!

Nuxmaga, great job avoiding snacking while exhausted. Always a huge challenge. Good luck on your next show—that pastry cart sounds dangerous.

Beverlyjoy, great job on a healthy day, with enough leftover for a second celebration meal. Ouch for the backache. Hope you’re feeling better soon.

BillBE, kudos for a “nominal on-plan day.” Yay for a sane thought that heads-off unplanned eating. Do you think those sane thoughts come quicker and more often the longer you maintain?

Gardenerjoy, you would think a wellness fair would offer healthy lunch choices, but good job being prepared. Congrats on being a longterm survivor.

ChinaMaine, yay for exercise and an on-plan day. I hate it when my dh is away as well, although I always use it as an excuse to watch super-girly movies. I don’t actually like them, but somehow it seems appropriate.

Hikegirl, thanks for all the positive energy. This is a great site—lots of good problem solvers and positive attitudes.

Just Checking In
 

Coaches/Buddies:
I've been very out of whack today and don't really have time or mental capacity for a very thorough post, but I won't let that stop me! That's been my problem in the past-- my perfectionism. If I can't do it "right", then I don't do it at all. Well, that isn't working so well for me.

What is working (so far, day 1) is having someone else I'm accountable to, to make sure that I'm posting. Thanks, Joy! :wave:

I did decide that even if I'm resistant to the whole planning thing, and not sure how I'm going to handle it all, I'm not going to let myself get hung up there. I am formulating some ideas in my head and hope in the next couple of days to make it more concrete and report it here.

So for today I will report that I:

- have read my Advantages before I've eaten
- tried to combat negative thoughts
- sat down while eating slowly and consciously (for the most part)
- stopped myself multiple times from picking at food while standing
- checked in with my coach (both here and via email)

I need to work on:

giving myself credit

Thanks for listening and being here. I definitely feel a boost after doing this-- the feeling that I did something "right" and that I took an important step in the right direction.

Sunday
 

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Directed my walk to get a haircut; CREDIT moi. Wish I remembered to get my haircut more frequently. Went to a big catered event - with multiple feeding troughs: Chinese, Italian, and carving with the best asparagus ever. And then over-the-top too much desserts. I did OK, because I have a generous allowance for major events. But I'm disappointed because the food wasn't particularly good - except for the asparagus. Left some food on my plate, so CREDIT moi for that. These things with waaaaaay too much food confuse my thinking; I want it all.

ChinaMaine - Yay for the full stint of exercise. Ouch for a full week without your DH.

Susan (hikergirl) - Yep, I'm feeling the positive energy you sent. Good stuff, that.

Kim (bennyhannamama) - Yay for getting a "boost" from taking a step in the right direction.

Joy (gardenerjoy) - Kudos for helping your brother get in contact with the survivors group; even if it doesn't click now, it might set the bit for when he does feel the need for it. Congrats for being a long term survivor yourself; I'm so old that when my grandmother died we only said the " 'C' word " - like Valdermort, it wasn't said out loud.

Shepherdess - Love your monster truck workout diet, LOL. What a neat toy. Thanks for the reminder that the goal is to "feel in control around food." Yep, it's that out-of-control feeling that I'd like to fade away.

CeeJay - Congrats on the twenty gone. Yep, think of a good reward - one that you'll savor.

silverbirch - Waving back.

Readers -

Hi Beck folks -

Yesterday was a healthy day.:) I enjoyed my leftover fish for lunch. We went out for supper with friends and I was willing to ask the waiter "What would you recommend for someone watching their choloesterol?" Actually - my choloestrol is good, but it's great way to find out what's healthy at the restaraunt. He pointed out the pasta with red sauce and veggies. (I hadn't noticed it!) Perfect! I ordered a half portion and was willing to leave some on the plate because I had eaten enough. CREDIT! :) I am so grateful.

My back is really hurting today - ugh....I need to take meds and rest it....phooey. :p Thanks to all for hoping it gets better soon.

I used 'stop fooling yourself' and 'oh well' when I wanted to eat to eat from the stress of my back hurting. I was having those conversations in my head about wanting to do some unplanned and compulsive eating. I am so, so grateful I was willing to push through the feelings. I reminded myself that food doesn't make pain go away....so,I'll take some drugs today and it should be improved in a day or two. I hate taking medications that make me loopy :dizzy: - but, they always seem to work, so I'll just do it.

I had a good 'beck' day-
made a new response card
logged food
gave credit
used many beck principles
no seconds
fork down
left a bite of food - most of the time
read arc/rc/no choice - 2 times
slow/mindful/tasting eating - most of the time
read beck book

oops
no exercise
no spontaneous exercise


My friend who told me about the Beck book because it had helped her - said to me via an email - that when she feels like she can't slow down when eating. She will take a day or two or more where she consciencely waits thirty seconds between bites. She used the second hand on her watch. I think it's a good idea that I could use now and then too. Thought I'd share. By the way, this friend has lost nearly 100 pounds with Beck and Weight Watchers. (I am a calories counter)

I will come back for personals...it hurts to be sitting at the computer for extended times.

Saturday
 

The Good :angel:
- Throughout the day, I identified satisfaction vs fullness while eating, and I stopped eating when satisfied – except for the chips – partial credit!
- Throughout the day, I identified hunger vs non-hunger before I ate – except for the chips – partial credit!
- Eat mindfully, enjoying every bite – except for the chips – partial credit!
- Give credit throughout the day for every positive eating behavior – yep!
- Tolerated non-hunger without eating – except for the chips – partial credit!
- Spontaneous exercise – yes!
- I posted here – yes!

The Bad, and the Ugly :no:
- Read the pink book – nope
- Used resistance techniques – nope

CeeJay :congrat: 20 lbs gone is fantastic! All your hard work is paying off.

Susan (hikergirl) :wave:

shepherdess Your story about the new-to-you truck made me smile. I wish I could see you driving it… It’s interesting to read your reaction to reaching maintenance weight; I think your plan is a good one… I like girly movies, and I too use his absences to watch them. It was Mamma Mia on Friday, but last night I watched Enchanted April. It’s definitely a girly movie, but not really a romance. It’s more about self-discovery and female bonding (with a bit of romance for good measure). But I always end up dreaming of spending a month in a castle on the Amalfi Coast – it’s vacation porn. :)

Kim (bennyhannamama) Sounds like you’ve got a plan – congrats on getting a diet coach!

Bill Isn’t it the case that food at those big events tends to be mediocre? At least the asparagus was good, but it’s too bad about the rest. Kudos for staying within your plans for the day.

Beverlyjoy Hopefully your meds will make you feel better today and help you recover in just a few days. Kudos for using resistance techniques so successfully! And for having so many credits when you are not feeling at all well – impressive.

The Wellness Fair was fun, although the information for the most part was too basic for our needs. I didn't do quite as well with the lunch as I'd hoped, but credit for skipping the pasta salad that I didn't like anyway, but would have eaten in the past because it was there. Minor rant: why would you put a pasta salad in a box lunch with a sandwich? Isn't two pieces of bread plenty of carbs for anyone at lunch?

One of the breakout sessions I intended was on exercise and I did pick up a few tips there, especially that the way I stand probably causes some of the problems I get in my shoulders and hips. No standing with hands on hips or arms crossed in front (rounds the shoulders forward) and no standing with all the weight on one foot, hip jutting out (since we tend to have a favorite foot to do that, the hips get out of balance over time).

WI: -0.05kg, Exercise: +30, 325/1550 minutes for March, Food: off, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

CeeJay: congrats on 20 pounds down!

ChinaMaine: the tilapia sounds wonderful! Good job throwing the chips away.

Beverlyjoy: take care of your self! Back pain really effects every part of life. Glad you know what works for you. For me, generally it's ice and careful exercise. Things tend to get worse if I sit too long -- especially, like you, if it's at the computer.

BillBlueEyes and Shepherdess: I read a book (I think it was _Changing for Good_ by Prochaska, et. al.) that outlined the steps it takes to overcome addiction. The last step was maintenance and they talked about how to tell if you have fully recovered or if you need to continue maintenance. If you knew you were going to die tomorrow, would you indulge in your addictive substance today? Apparently, most smokers and some alcoholics will eventually reach the point where they will say that they would not want a cigarette or a drink on their last day on the planet. However, most alcoholics and nearly all overeaters never reach that point and always are in a maintenance mode of continuing to have to consciously exert control over the desire to drink or overeat. But, as Beck tells us, it keeps getting easier.

Hi to everyone else!

The roads were a muddy, muddy mess yesterday, so I skipped my plan long run. Instead I did my strength workout (both the truck workout and the one involving recognizable home-gym equipment). I haven’t done my full workout in almost a month—just a few exercises here and there. For the most part, I was able to pick up where I left off, and even increase weights on some moves. It’s good to know that even though I’m not doing the formal workout, I’m still getting a workout from my day-to-day activities.

We went to a Mammoth Ball last night—a fundraiser/celebration of a recently excavated mammoth. One of our neighbors discovered a mammoth bone while moving dirt for an oil well. It wound up being a pretty exciting find. It is the largest intact mammoth skeleton in the state. The paleontologist is a good friend of ours and teaches geology at the local community college. DH and I went out to the site last summer when they were excavating the tusk and just discovering the skull—the tusk is about 9 ft long.

The event was a lot of fun and I was able to stick to my plan. Skip hors d’oeuvres, leave half my entre, and enjoy a small portion of dessert. My calorie intake was no doubt higher than my usual day, but within my plan for a special occasion. As a bonus, I was able to fit into a dress that I bought back in college. I loved the dress, only wore it once or twice, and for years it was too tight, but I didn’t have the heart to get rid of it. I actually ran across it in the closet not too long before starting Beck and was thinking I just needed to get rid of it since I’d never be able to wear it again. It’s a pretty big reward to be able to wear it again.

Bennyhannamamma, if you have the time and energy to read this, huge congrats on just getting in here and posting. That perfectionist, all-or-nothing attitude has been difficult for me as well. It is so much more helpful to try to make the best choices for the given circumstances.

BillBE, kudos for a walk with a purpose and congrats on successfully navigating the feeding troughs. I have a difficult time avoiding overeating at events where the food is plentiful but not that great. I don’t know if I’m trying to make up for the lack of flavor in volume or if I’m sampling everything to find the one good dish. Thanks for your quote—I’m working on this one right now!

Beverlyjoy, what a great restaurant strategy! I have such a difficult time being assertive at when ordering, but you are an inspiration. Ouch for the back pain, but good job recognizing that eating won’t help.

ChinaMaine, ouch for munching on chips “like there is no tomorrow.” I know all about that. Good job throwing them away. I need to get my dh on board with a “no chips in the house” rule, though I buy them too thinking I’ll be able to control myself. LOL at “vacation porn.”

Gardenerjoy, I loved your line “credit for skipping the pasta salad that I didn't like anyway, but would have eaten in the past because it was there.” If I wonder how many lbs I would have saved myself if I didn’t eat food I didn’t really like. . . That’s an interesting point about weight maintenance. I have to admit that I would definitely take that “last meal” and it seems I’m always looking for an excuse to have one.

Good Day to all of you. I am well. Look after yourselves for today and I look forward to reading your posts tomorrow.
Susan

Hello everyone:

Nuxmaga- credit for not eating when exhausted. Resisting is so much more difficult when you are tired.

Beverlyjoy-yay for staying on plan during your meals at the restaurants. You are doing fantastic!! Hope your pain is less today.

BillBlueEyes-good for you for resisting the chocolate coffee beans. I find it hard during meetings when everyone else is eating the treat of the day. For morning meetings I bring my regular morning snack, yogurt and berries, in with me but sometimes I have to fight the deprivation feelings. And also yay for your self control at the catered event.

gardenerjoy-credit for skipping the pasta salad. I know all about the tendency to eat whatever is there, just because it is there.

ChinaMaine-Yay for having a plan for meals. Oh well about the chips.

silverbirch- waving hello.

hikergirl-thanks for the positive energy- sending some your way too.

Shepherdess-sounds like a good plan to deal with the issues you are experiencing upon reaching your goal. It is so helpful for the rest of us to read your posts about how you are feeling so when we get there, we will recognize that these feelings are normal. (Whatever normal means :D). What a wonderful feeling it must have been to get in your dress from years past.

bennyhannahmama-kuddos for your list of credits.

For me- thanks to everyone for your congratulations on the 20 pounds. I was happy seeing no scale fluctuation today so I got to see the same number again.

I am having a good day so far. Planning on a walk with my mom and then she is coming over to watch the Oscars. This is a yearly tradition for us. Most years that meant making very calorie laden snacks. This year I am making a chick pea dip- mom can have crackers, I am planning on dipping veggies.

Credit today so far for:

weighing in
reading advantage and response cards
posting here
eating on plan so far
eating mindfully and slower- this is getting just a little bit easier but still a work in progress

:grouphug:

Checking In
 

Coaches/Buddies:
I'm fighting the voices that are telling me that there's no point in posting if I'm not going to "do it right". Well, I'm not going to skip this. This is important and helps keep my accountable.
I had a difficult weekend mentally. I just felt off. I'm not sure why. I think the most important thing I can do for myself right now is go to bed. I will do that shortly.